


Caramel Frappuccinos and Silly Texting

by Schiffsgefangnis



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Anal Sex, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-11-13
Updated: 2014-03-22
Packaged: 2018-01-01 09:10:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 115,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1043042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Schiffsgefangnis/pseuds/Schiffsgefangnis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Reiner was tricked by Eren into switching dorm rooms with him, thinking he would be sharing with Connie. Instead, he's paired with a tall, shy boy who likes caramel frappuccinos. Maybe Eren deceiving him wasn't such a bad thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Eren, you lying little shit! You said I would be paired with Connie!”

Standing in the center of his dorm room, with his schedule clutched in one of his hands (the paper held his classes, along with the room number of his dorm, and who he would be sharing it with), Reiner has his mouth curled back in an angry grimace as he holds his cell to his ear. He can hear Eren snicker a little bit, and it makes him crumble his schedule in his fist with escalated irritation.

“Hey, I would much rather bunk with Armin, than that kid. If lying that Connie would be your partner if we switched, then I would take the chance of inflicting damage on our friendship.”, Eren casually retorts, brushing off Reiner's clear agitation. Reiner huffs, and then lets out a deep exhale, trying to clear his thoughts of kicking him in the side later.

“Look. I am not kidding, Eren. If you don't switch back with me, I'm going to tell Jean every class you go to, what day, and what time. Including your dorm room number.”, Reiner snarls. He really hated having to deal with sharing rooms with a complete stranger, especially seeing as the majority of his freshman year were people he knew. And out of all of them, he was stuck with a new student.

“Don't you even dare, Reiner. Why not just give the guy a chance? He may seem like an okay roommate! Sheesh.”, Eren says, no doubt trying to save his own ass. Reiner rolls his eyes when he realizes Eren hung up after that. With a sigh, he slides his phone back into his jean's pocket and then smooths out his schedule to re-read his room partner's name.

Bertholdt, eh? How does he even pronounce that?

He stares at his name as he contemplates it. Maybe he could give it a try, meeting the guy. Maybe Eren was right. Maybe he should give him a chance. If Bertholdt turns out to be intolerable, Reiner would have to convince Eren somehow.

Reiner folds his schedule into a square and puts it in his pocket alongside his phone, before he grabs his duffel bag off his floor, and lets it fall onto his bed. It bounces before settling. Then he yanks it open to begin pulling his things out. First, he'll put his clothes away.

After ten minutes of folding pants and hanging up shirts, he hears the door open. Glancing over, he finds a shockingly tall boy, with a demure expression and a backpack slung over a shoulder. Reiner looks at him, taking note of his dark hair that parted in three ways, his skinny jeans with a long sleeved t-shirt that had an album cover from The Police on the front, and his face that looked really...perspired. And nervous.

“Hey”, Reiner simply greets, and returns to stacking his jeans in his dresser. He barely hears a mumbled greeting. It was a simple, shy 'hello' that Reiner had to pause to process it. Raising his honey colored eyes to him again, Reiner notices him lingering at the door, face remaining uneasy.

“Plenty of room in here, I assure you.”, Reiner jokes, giving him a small smirk, and then returns to his duffel bag to pull out his various personal items that he bothered to bring with him to Uni. Just some books, and his laptop with the appropriate cords and such. 

Bertholdt, presumably, doesn't reply, only paces into the room after quietly shutting the door behind him. Already, Reiner has an impression of him. That he will be a trouble-free, probably-non-existent roommate. Reiner was relieved, but also a little disappointed. He was hoping for a more...he didn't know. A more 'open' partner, he muses. Someone that wouldn't be so inside their own shell that it would make things awkward. He assumes Bertholdt is the type that makes things awkward. Well, he'll have to see, then.

They unpack in silence. Reiner had a head start, so he finishes after organizing his things on his own personal desk. After setting his bag on the floor beside the dresser, he turns and looks about the room with a sigh. Bertholdt is on the opposite side, by his bed, looking through his own bag, back to Reiner. Reiner notices the horrible paint job of the walls, but it doesn't really bother him. It was more an observation. What a bland yellow color.

He hums and then looks at Bertholdt again. Would it be considered rude to just leave him here to go hang around with his friends? Wouldn't that seem...asshole-y? Reiner wouldn't want to have a bad impression on the kid, so he speaks up.

“I'm Reiner, by the way. You probably saw on your schedule, though. Just thought it would be proper to introduce myself, rather than a paper.”, he says with confidence, pulling up and down on the zipper to his thin grey jacket. Bertholdt glances at him, turning his way a little bit, with a book in his thin hands. His eyebrows are raised, his expression no longer hesitant.

“Oh”, he says, and looks down at the book in his hands, “I'm Bertholdt.”

Ah, so that's how he pronounces it. Bert-hold. No 'thhh' sound then. Reiner gives him a forced grin when his olive green eyes are drawn to him once more. “Well, then, Bertholdt, hope you don't find me as too much of a prick.”, Reiner says, ceasing his fiddling with the zipper to cross his arms.

Bertholdt gives a light smile, his eyes resting on Reiner, “I doubt I will find you that way at all.” Reiner gives a laugh, genuine, and nods, “Cool, that's good. So, uh, I'll let you get back to your unpacking. Hope you don't mind me leaving you here with the horrid wall paint.” He claps his hands together randomly as he approaches the door. Bertholdt mumbles something, and Reiner only gives him a brief look, before opening the door, saying a quick 'see ya' before striding out. He shuts the door gently behind him before he begins down the hallway, towards the room number that he knows is Eren's. Oh, he wasn't going to beat him up. He just wanted to get Connie's room number. Connie tended to humor him with his stupidity.

\----------

“So, how'd it go?”

Loitering in the lounge area with his pals, Reiner lazes in one of the couches, and watches as Sasha and Connie battle it out through table tennis. Eren, Armin, Jean, and Marco are sitting around with him. Jean was staring at the sports channel playing on the flat screen, while Marco was reading a book, feet drawn up onto the couch so his knees were raised by his freckled face. Sometimes, Reiner wonders how he manages to keep track of the page he's on with one hand. Whenever Reiner tries to turn a page with a single hand, the book flips out on him and slips away. Somehow.

“Hnn?”, Reiner makes a noise in response, turning his gaze from his friend with the eye-patch and single arm to the friend with the striking emerald green irises and always-seemingly-tense face, quirking one of his thin eyebrows. “Your roommate? How'd he turn out?”, Eren repeats, brow furrowing.

“Oh. Yeah, he seems alright.”, Reiner says over the loud conversation of some other few college freshman sitting at the table a few feet away. Eren raises a brow too. “Really? So you're not going to bite my ass over switching rooms?”, he asks with amusement. Reiner gives a nod and returns his attention to the boring sports channel. It was on soccer, so Reiner didn't really care for it.

Eren gives a light laugh, “Sweet...you still aren't gonna give Jean my classes, right?”

“I don't even want to know your classes, Jaeger.”, Jean calls from the other side of the wide sofa with boredom lacing his tone. Eren snaps at him to shut it, and Jean retorts saying that he was an angry little dwarf that should go back to his dwarf cave. Eren growls and stands, but Armin and Marco protest to it. Reiner sighs and drops his head back into the cushion of the couch. He was tired. Maybe he should go back to his room and nap.

It had been about four days since the starting of the semester, and he was already exhausted from trying to figure everything out. He was still processing he was in college now. Shit, he actually has to be responsible, with adult responsibilities. That sucked.

With a groan, he sits up and pushes from the couch, ultimately separating the view between Jean and Eren. He declares, “Well, I'm heading back to my room. Catch you guys later.” He hears Marco pipe out a good-bye, and to have a nice evening and all that like he usually does, and Reiner appreciates it. Eren mumbles a good-bye as well.

“You too”, he says over his shoulder before leaving the area to shove out the door.

 

When he returns to the room, he finds Bertholdt on his bed, laying back with a book raised above his head, dark hair drawn out across his pillow. He was wearing his light blue plaid pyjama pants and a dark grey t-shirt. Reiner greets him as he shuts the door behind him.

“Welcome back”, Bertholdt says quietly as he turns a page. Reiner smiles lightly as he removes his leather coat, before draping it over the back of his chair to his desk. “What'cha been up to, Bertholdt?”, he muses as he plops down on his bed, to begin removing his boots.

“Reading.”

“What?”

“Reading.”

“No, I mean like, _what_ are you reading?”

“Oh. Uh, just a book for my lit class.”

Reiner hums as he yanks off his last boot, before tossing it aside like his previous abused shoe. Then he begins to change into his pyjamas. Which was simply sweat pants and a white tank top. He refused to call it 'wife beater'. Who even decided to call it that?

He takes a heavy seat on his bed with a sigh and looks over at his roommate again. Bertholdt's eyes are drawn up to his book. His elbows are resting on the bed, with his hands supporting his book above his gaze. Bertholdt's arms sure are slender.

“Hey, what classes do you take anyways?”, Reiner asks as he rests against the wall beside his bed, arms draped lazily in his lap. Bertholdt's eyes avert to him. Then he says, “Interpreting Literature, Honors English, European history, uh and Calculus.”

Reiner hums. “So you planning on doing something regarding literature?” He scratches at his cheek as he looks over at his taller roommate. Bertholdt gives a shrug, lifting his gaze back to his book. After a moment, he sets his book on his chest, leaving it open. He is quiet for a moment before saying, “I've considered being an author, but the interest left me after tenth grade... I guess just wherever I land, I hope that I'll be satisfied with it.” Reiner stares at him, momentarily awed by his words. That seems pretty fucking legit. Reiner wish he had that same outlook for his career.

He doesn't know what to say, so he just hums. For some reason, he finds himself wanting to learn more about him. Maybe Bertholdt is one of those people where you have to let them grow comfortable with you before they're more themselves. Bertholdt glances at him then, earning Reiner's attention once more.

“Reiner...where are you from? Your name..sounds Germanic.”

Reiner gives a light grin, and nods a little bit, “Yeah, I'm from Germany.”

“Which city?”

“I was born in Hamburg, but lived in Berlin. Well. Until I was about eight, then moved to America with my family.”, Reiner says, raising his gaze to the ceiling as he thinks about it. He can remember Berlin a little bit, but not so much his hometown. He was about to ask the same of Bertholdt, but he speaks out before he could.

“So..do you speak German?”

“Not as fluently as I used to. My family doesn't really bother to speak German anymore. Only during family holidays, I suppose. Anyways, yeah, I do.”, Reiner blabbers, and then laughs a little bit. Bertholdt is quiet momentarily, so Reiner asks, “What about you? Where you from?”

“I was born into a German family, thus my name, but I haven't lived in Germany. I want to visit though. I've lived in the U.S my entire life.”

“Oh, I see.”, Reiner says, and then that's that. Bertholdt merely nods and returns to his book. Reiner thinks about it for a moment, staring up at the ceiling as he fiddles with his fingers in his lap, before he feels a vibration from his phone by his side. He grabs his phone and opens the text.

It read: “From Baldy: _kicked Sasha's a$$ in table tennis. She's sobbing in the corner now_ ” Reiner snorts and replies with few swipes of his thumb, “ _don't be a dick, say she put up a good fight or s/t_ ” Following him sending it, he receives a separate text.

“From Sasha: _connie's bald head was distracting. that's all. and no, i'm not sobbing_ ” Reiner laughs at that, and shakes his head. Bertholdt is looking over at him, he can tell by the pause of the pages turning. Oh, that reminds him. He's been meaning to ask.

“Hey, Bertholdt, do you have a phone? Gimme your number so I can text you during class and get you in trouble.”, he calls as he swipes out a reply for Sasha. Bertholdt says in a soft voice, “Yeah, and sure. Are you ready for the number or..?”

“Go ahead”, Reiner says as he goes to the menu to open the new contact option.

\----------

The first text Reiner sends Bertholdt is the next day (the fifth day of Uni) during his break between classes. And during Bertholdt's break, as well. Reiner was able to sneak a peek at Bertholdt's schedule when the paper was innocently resting on his roommate's desk, so now he knows when he can harass him.

“ _what's up? I'm already dead from class, so don't expect me to show up at the room. Also I should have a nickname for you. I have nicknames for all my friends, pretty much. Haha I just thought of bagel for you. Be glad I'm not gonna choose that_ ” Reiner laughs at his own lame humor as he sends it, and then trudges closer to the Starbucks on campus, hoping for a coffee to warm him up. Sometimes, he hated late fall, and sometimes he liked it. He liked it cause of the typical crunching of the leaves under his feet, and hated it because cold. Just cold is all the reason he needs. After about six minutes, he's given a reply.

“ _Hi, Reiner. And okay, I'll keep a look out for your corpse, then. Don't call me Bagel, please. I don't mind what you make up, just don't call me a breakfast food. Or a dog breed that suspiciously sounds like Bagel._ ”

Reiner snickers to himself after reading the text, standing behind a few grumpy college students in line.

“ _Damnit, you figured me out. how about Bertl?_ ”

Bertholdt takes less time to reply.

“ _That sounds fine, Rei Rei._ ”

Reiner is mildly surprised to find that Bertholdt is more confident and _sarcastic_ when its not face to face. Reiner laughs aloud at the dumb nickname, earning a brief glance from the person in front of him.

“ _you just dug up unpleasant memories of a girlfriend back in eighth grade. I had a full-body shudder just then_ ”

“ _see you back at the room, Reiner.”,_ is the response he's given only a minute later, and it makes Reiner smile a little bit. He notices he's second in line when he begins to put his phone away. An idea comes to mind. Hurriedly, he begins to type out a new text.

__“_ can't get rid of me that easily. what's your fav coffee? _”_ _

Bertholdt takes a moment to reply, and Reiner stresses over if he'll answer in time before he's next.

__“_ Don't laugh, but caramel frappuccino. Please don't ask if i'm a hipster high school girl _”_ _

__“_ oh don't worry, I never doubted it _”,__ Reiner types back just as the girl in front of him steps aside for him. The cashier asks what he would like as he grins and slips his phone in his pocket. Bertholdt is so going to be spoiled with caramel frappuccinos this year.


	2. Chapter 2

It was one of those special sunny, warm days in the late fall. The sun peeks in from behind the cloudy sky, casting a glow upon the unsuspecting college students. It was after his classes for the day when Reiner noticed. Upon spotting the rays of sunshine outside the dusty window of the dorm room, he leaped from his bed, struggled to pull on his jeans (stumbling once or twice, and he could have sworn he heard Bertl muffle a giggle), before darting out the room in search of Connie's room number. If anyone knew how to appreciate a good day when one came, it was Connie. Sometimes Eren, and sometimes Jean. Marco no doubt would want to tag along. Unless he had studying or work to do.

Reiner considers who would want to go out with him and Connie as he screeches to a halt before his friend's room. He gives quick knocks. The door is opened a long moment later after some grumbles and loud footsteps come from within the dorm room. When its drawn open, it reveals a grumpy Jean with a hella messy head of hair.

“Reiner, what do you want that must be so important as to disrupt my mid-day nap?”, he says with a croaky voice, rubbing at his eye and yawning not a moment later. Reiner breathes a bit too heavily from his running as he replies, “Connie here?” Jean rolls his eyes, used to that question whenever he answered to Reiner. 

“If I didn't know any better...I would have thought you were gay for the kid”, Jean mumbles before calling over his shoulder, “Ey, idiot, Reiner is here for you!” Jean simply walks away to return to his bed and collapse. Glancing in, Reiner takes note on how messy the room is. Bertholdt had grown accustomed to where Reiner put his things, so he had started cleaning up anything Reiner had forgotten to deal with. Reiner was clean to an extent. But this room was ridiculous.

Connie disrupts his thoughts a minute later by appearing in his vision as he emits from the bathroom with a towel around his waist, steam rolling off his arms and shoulders. Reiner mentally slaps a hand over his forehead at the bad timing. Whatever.

“What's up?”, Connie says as he trudges over to dig for his clothes on his bed amongst his clutter of things. 

“Did you even look out the window, dude? There's sunlight! It's warm! You know what that means?”, Reiner begins with excitement, beckoning to the window with it's ugly drapes drawn. Connie was in the midst of pulling on a wrinkly t-shirt, and stopped to turn to him, looking at him through the neck hole that was lodged over his bald head. 

“Shit, really. What does it mean?”

“We can go outside without freezing our balls off!”, Reiner exclaims, earning a pillow weakly thrown at him from Jean. Connie curses again and rushes to pull on his shirt, struggling really badly as he does so, getting his arms stuck above his head. In his excitement, Reiner begins to laugh until Connie was laughing too. 

“Damnit, help me”, he says between chuckles, and Reiner enters the room to yank it down in one pull. “You can't even dress yourself properly. Funny how your head is too big for your shirt, but barely holds anything within”, Reiner teases as he watches Connie attempt to smooth out the wrinkles.

“Hey, don't be a dick. And if you don't want to see mine, I suggest you leave so I can get dressed to go outside.”, Connie retorts as he grabs his jeans off the floor. Reiner laughs again and then turns to leave the room, shutting the door behind him, satisfied with the confirmation. He pulls out his phone to ask if Eren, Armin, or Marco wanted to join.

 

In the end, Reiner, Marco, Connie, and Eren had agreed to grabbing some light food at the deli, before heading to the spacious grassy area in the center of the campus, to throw a ball or just walk around or something. Bertholdt hadn't really put in some of his own input. He just went along with whatever the group of buffoons wanted to do. Excluding that describing word from Marco. He wasn't a buffoon.

When Reiner had returned to his room to grab his football from his bag, he noticed that Bertholdt was watching him from his bed, his knees drawn up and arms wrapped around his shins. He looked rather bored. Reiner noticed he had discarded his book by his side. 

“Hey, Bertl, wanna hang out with me and my friends? They're cool, I'm sure they won't mind if you came. It would suck to stay in a stuffy room during a nice day. We're gonna eat and then head to the grassy area.”, Reiner had spoken as he approached his bag by the dresser. Shit, was it considered the quad? He didn't know what the students called it. A moment of pause passed before he heard Bertholdt say, “Are you sure they'll be okay with it?”

Reiner nods as he grabs the ball, before lifting his head to look back at his roommate, “No doubt! C'mon, it'll be fun.” Bertholdt smiles meekly at him, and gives a nod before he lowers his knees from himself and stands. He was already wearing his daily clothes, so all he had to put on was a light coat and a navy blue scarf. He tied it all fancy around his neck, and Reiner thought it looked good on him. It matched his dark hair nicely. 

“Sweet, let's go.”, Reiner says with a genuine grin, pumped now that his sort-of-maybe-friend/roomie was tagging along. He could get to know him better through this, perhaps. They leave the room, and Bertholdt makes sure to turn off the lights first before locking the door. Then they hurry down the hallway to Marco's room, closest to the staircase, where everyone is waiting. 

When he introduced Bertholdt to everyone, they all were kind. There was a 'what's up, tall guy?' from Connie, a 'Hey, nice to meet you' from Eren, and a 'Oh, Bertholdt, nice to see you again!' from Marco. Reiner had paused at that, and Marco explained they had a class together. Bertholdt seemed relieved to see Marco there, and gave him an almost unnoticeable smile. He said a quiet hello to everyone in general, before Connie ushered them all to the staircase where they had to clamber down three floors to get to the warmth of the sun.

At the deli (it took about eight minutes to walk there), Connie and Reiner were loud with conversation, while Bertholdt and Marco were discussing the book they were reading for class. Eren was just amused watching it all happen, content with his texting conversation with Armin. Reiner and Connie got the exact same sandwich (Connie typically copied other peoples' favorite things to try it out for himself), Eren had a bagel (Reiner laughed at that and Bertholdt smiled), and Marco ordered a small basket-like thing of fries. Bertholdt had a pretzel with cheese.

They sat and ate/talked for about thirty minutes. Reiner, Connie, and Eren lead the loud conversation and debates, while Marco and Bertholdt were the more observant ones. Marco occasionally commented on something or cracked one of his unintentionally clever jokes, whereas Bertholdt was silent. He seemed entertained enough, seeing as he was smiling a little bit due to Reiner yelling over Connie's claims of him previously having a hopeless, deep crush on Christa in his senior year of high school. Which may or may not have been true. Eventually they were asked to be quiet after their heated argument became too boisterous. 

Marco was snickering as Connie and Reiner solemnly ate at their matching sandwiches. Bertholdt was hiding an amused smile as he picked at his pretzel. Eren was already done with his bagel, and was simply watching the two with amusement, brow raised mockingly. 

Following the request of silence from the student employee, they soon left to the grassy park. Of course, Bertholdt had fallen behind to clean up after Connie, being the polite (maybe slight OCD) person he is. When he caught up, Reiner simply told him he didn't have to do that. Connie was just slow in the mind. Connie heard that and smacked Reiner on the arm, earning a laugh from all of them. 

Once in the park, under the comforting warmth of the sun, Reiner had removed his coat to reveal his tight t-shirt. He challenged Connie to throw the football as far as he could, with a teasing smirk upon his lips, because there is no way he would not be able to catch it in time. Bertholdt was sitting with Marco on the bench as they watched Eren, Connie, and Reiner run around the field. Eventually, Eren had paused to, no doubt, text Armin or Mikasa.

“How's Reiner for a room mate? Hopefully he isn't this demanding as a roomie.”, Marco speaks with a light tone when Reiner tackles Eren jokingly, after the brunette had returned to play the game. Bertholdt winces for Eren before he says, “He's fine. I'm just glad he isn't messy. That's all I was hoping for. And...he's really kind.” Marco hums and then chuckles, “Yeah, he does seem to be more thoughtful of you!” 

Bertholdt is quiet for a moment, before saying hurriedly, “I meant, like, in general. He seems like a nice guy. I don't know.” Marco gave a little laugh, breath slightly visible in the air, and Bertholdt hates how his own cheeks fill with blood instantly. The scarf is making him sweat more, too. He removes it with his long fingers and drapes it in his lap.

“Who are you sharing with?”, he asks, glancing over at Marco. Marco's effected side (Bertholdt doesn't think it would be proper to think of it as the _damaged_ side, because in all honesty, it didn't damage _Marco_ ) was facing him so Bertholdt looks quietly at his eye patch and the scars around it, before Marco turns to face him more. 

“Oh. I'm with Tomas. He's an alright roommate. I..was hoping to bunk with Jean, but we don't get what we want all the time, do we?” , Marco begins, and then his tone of voice becomes softer. He turns back to the display of Connie and Reiner sprawled out on the grass, panting like dogs as they fought for breath. Eren was nudging Reiner's leg until Reiner grabbed him by the ankle and attempted to knock him off his feet. Eren jumped away in time with a shout.

“I'm sure you could speak to the administrator. Or something. Request a change to Jean's room. If Jean put in a word, maybe they would see into it.”, Bertholdt speaks gently, looking at Marco's furrowed brow and forced smile. Marco looks at him, and his smile extends to one that shows his dimples. He nods, and seems to be honestly grateful for the words.

“Yeah, maybe I will. Thanks, Bertholdt.”

Bertholdt returns the smile lightly, and then looks back out to watch Reiner sit up with grass all over his blond hair, a wide grin on his lips. Bertholdt sighs. 

“Hey!”, Eren calls suddenly, earning both of their gazes, “I'm bored, let's go back!” Reiner and Connie leap up then and dash towards Marco and Bertholdt, challenging each other again. Reiner had won, but he stumbles a little bit and nearly crashes on top of Bertholdt. Bertholdt had put up protective arms around himself and clenched his eyes shut when Reiner's chest was right in his face, but Reiner caught his footing. He laughs breathlessly when he steps back and apologizes, honey-colored eyes on Bertholdt's anxious face.

Marco stands and offers him a hand. Bertholdt looks at Reiner's flushed face for a moment, wary for any sudden “friendly” punches to the arm, and then he takes Marco's hand. He stands, and then realizes his scarf fell from his lap to the grass. He tsks and bends to grab it, but a hand beats him.

“Here you go, Bertl. For almost crushing you.”, Reiner quickly says with a grin, joking, of course. Bertholdt nods, offers a perk of his mouth, and accepts it. He secures it around his neck after brushing off any clinging blades of grass. Eren is approaching by then, having taken his time to regroup with them unlike the other two. Connie is still catching his breath, wheezing as he supports himself by his hands on his knees.

“You got weak game, Connie”, Reiner calls over his shoulder, eyes still on his roommate. Bertholdt feels nervous, but is mildly comforted by Marco's light smile directed towards him. Then Reiner steps past Bertholdt to grab his coat from the back of the bench.

“Whatever. Let's just go back, I'm tired as hell. You're a beast, Braun”, Connie breathlessly says, and Eren laughs with agreement. Reiner begins towards the pathway, and everyone else follows. From behind, Bertholdt can't help but notice how Reiner would be an excellent leader. Which was a random thought.

\----------

“Shit, I'm beat.”, Reiner groans as he collapses onto his bed, the springs groaning in return under his weight. After everyone had split up at the break between the hallways, Bertholdt and Reiner walked together towards their room. They were silent through the brief walk, and as Bertholdt unlocked the door.

“You did run a lot.”, Bertholdt says in reply as he sets his scarf on his desk, after folding it neatly. Reiner hums, eyes closed as he lazes back onto his bed, limbs sprawled. He hears Bertholdt move about, and then the sound of him taking a seat on his separate bed urges Reiner to open his eyes to look at him. Bertholdt is briefly looking at his phone.

That's when Reiner realizes, throughout the opportunity he was given, he only learned that Bertholdt previously knew Marco. And he likes pretzels. Well, then. 

Oh, but he had been wondering one thing when he was playing around with Eren and Connie on the field.

“Do you play any sports, Bertl?”, he asks, letting his head fall back onto his pillow. A pause follows. It was longer than usual, so Reiner lifts his gaze to him. Bertholdt's phone is discarded to his side, and his knees are drawn up like before, with his slender arms secured around them. His chin is resting on his knees.

“Well..”, he begins, olive green eyes falling to Reiner, “can you promise not to mock me about it?” Reiner scoffs, “Of course I won't mock you.” Bertholdt gives him an unamused look. Then Reiner nods and says, “Yeah yeah, I promise.” Bertholdt sighs.

“I am into gymnastics. Um. Yeah. I've been doing it since I was ten.”, he sputters, face hiding behind his knees. Reiner blinks a few times, not expecting that. He thought he was going to say like, basketball or something that would be based on his height. Maybe that just meant he was flexible. Reiner hums, and looks away from Bertholdt, “Never met a gymnast before. Well, that just means you have to show me your skills, then. Hell, you've been doing it for a long fucking time then. You should be able to show off once in a while.” He props up on an elbow at the idea of seeing Bertholdt doing....whatever gymnasts do, and stares at the boy across the room.

At those words, Bertholdt draws his head up to give him a horrified look. “No!”, he gasps, hiding his face behind his hands, “No, no, nononono!” Reiner stares, shocked, and thoughts of 'oh my god that was really strangely cute' zoom through his mind. 

“Oh come on, its no big deal right? Just some like..gymnastic stuff couldn't be so bad, right? I won't laugh, I promise. See, you didn't even have to ask me that time.”, Reiner says gently, and Bertholdt shakes his head harder, ears burning red. Reiner smiles a little bit, “Bertl...come on...if you don't, I'm going to start calling you Bagel!”

Bertholdt yanks his hands from his face at that and builds up the most non-threatening glare he could possess. Reiner could tell he was really trying to look mad, but it was just really amusing/cute. Reiner couldn't repress a snicker at that face. Bertholdt huffs, “Don't! That's so unfair of you! Reiner, you're so..” He trails off, trying to think of the most accurate and insulting word he could come up with.

“Handsome? Kind? Reasonable?” 

“Pushy! Now leave me alone!”

After that, Bertholdt falls to his side to hide his face in his pillow, hands gripping the sides. Reiner laughs aloud unintentionally, and can't breathe after a minute of laughing. Bertholdt ends up throwing the pillow at him. Well, at least Reiner now knows he is a gymnast, and he gets really embarrassed over the most random things. And he was cute as heck, which is something that he _is_ willing to file away in the 'Bertholdt' folder. 

Perhaps, Bertholdt will show him some other time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mina1914.tumblr.com
> 
>  **A/N:** I think that Connie would be really good friends with Reiner, based on their personalities. It may seem shippy but it's not meant to be..!


	3. Chapter 3

It was pretty uneventful the first month of the semester. Reiner was sucked in by his courses, and suddenly they were throwing all these papers, quizzes, and _requirements_ at him. Those times spent with his friends were all but gone with how much lackluster studying and working he had to fit into his schedule. Which was a drag. Although, luckily, he scored a roommate that was excellent at studying. Not that Reiner was _using_ him for that purpose. But still. Bertholdt was a good study buddy.

He learned some little things about Bertholdt throughout the month. Randomly, the task of discovering new things about his roommate was Reiner's own personal challenge. Within a month, he learned of Bertholdt's favorite things (his animal is the ferret, his color navy blue, his food was crackers with hummus, and his favorite activity was reading. Reiner should have seen that one coming), his birthday, his least favorite class, where he liked to hang out if he were to hang out (the library. Who woulda thought), and other little things. He also discovered his habits. From observation, Reiner realized that Bertholdt tended to bring his legs up on a bed or a couch to hide behind his knees, in a way of comfort. And whenever he ducked his head down around other people, that meant he was uncomfortable. When he was nervous, he would excessively sweat and bite at his fingertips.

Sometimes, Reiner wasn't entirely obtuse. He could tell Bertholdt is one of those people that preferred to be alone, rather than being with a group of people. It seemed like he enjoyed being around Reiner and his friends sometimes, though. Maybe he did grow lonely. 

The week following the finish of the first month, Reiner was giving up on life. Not really. He just gave up on his will to be responsible. When he _still_ had studying to do, he lazed around on his laptop, until Bertholdt had asked if he was going to bother preparing for the midterm he had whined about earlier. 

“I will.”, was all Reiner had said in reply, and continued aimlessly browsing through his Facebook that he rarely went on. He saw some posts from Christa pop up, but she wasn't as active as the others either. He became a little stalker-ish and went through her photos. Dang, she was still cute. Her bright, perfect smile was on her (kissable) lips in each picture.

“Are you just saying that?”, Bertholdt pressed on from across the room, attention mainly focused on the book in his hands. Reiner always wondered how he could bother to read so much for a class. That would be really boring. Maybe Bertholdt liked the books. Who knows. Reiner shrugs as he looks at a smiling face of Christa. He notices that she's online, too. 

“Maybe”, Reiner says in a mumble, attention diverting to the chat box he's opening to talk to Christa. He hesitates. Then he throws his caution to the wind with a 'why the fuck not?' going through his thoughts before typing out a brief 'hey how are you, whatcha been up to, we haven't talked in a while' kind of greeting.

Bertholdt sighs then, and Reiner barely processes it. His heart races as he hits enter. He stares, waiting for any indication that she's replying. Its five minutes later when she starts typing a reply. He bites at his lip as he anxiously waits. 

' _oh! Hello, Reiner! I haven't talked to you since you left for uni! How is it there? Are your classes hard? I hope you're doing alright!_ '

Christa was still a sweetheart, as usual. Reiner flushes in the cheeks a little bit.

“I'm having an aneurysm, Reiner”, Bertholdt states suddenly, unamused. Reiner hums, slowly nodding as he types up a reply, “That's nice.” Bertholdt tosses his book at him, but it only reaches the foot of his bed. He wasn't trying too hard to hit the blond, he just wanted his damn attention.

“Why are you blushing anyways? When do you ever blush?”

Reiner huffs. Bertholdt sure can get persistent when he gets comfortable enough with someone. “Shut up, I'm trying to save a relationship with a girl I had a crush on before”, Reiner plainly says as he sends a reply to her message. Bertholdt throws his pillow at him as well.

“Oh, good enough reason to avoid studying”, Bertholdt lamely says with sarcasm, frowning deeply. He had been previously propped up on his elbow, looking over at his roommate that was enveloped with his laptop on his bed, but then he falls back down onto his side. With a bored sigh, Bertholdt rolls onto his front and buries his face in the covers of his bed. 

He mentally wishes Reiner bad luck with that.

\----------

After the conversation with Christa on Facebook, Reiner was able to gain her number. By the time Christa admits she has things to do and she has to go, its almost seven. Reiner was disappointed, but it was understandable. When she had said goodbye and her online status was switched to offline, Reiner merely shut his laptop and discarded it to his side. Well, now what? Texting her instantly would be stupid, so he simply let it be for now. Looking over, he notices that Bertholdt is missing.

Where could he have gone? Probably to the library to study or something. Reiner opens his phone to send him a text.

' _hey bertl, sorry about that, it was important. If you're at the library, I could come over and we could study together_ ' 

He stares at the sent text for a long moment. Was it really that important—the conversation? He gives a shrug at the thought. He was glad to be in touch with Christa again, so yeah, it was. Thinking back on their conversation, he smiles a little bit. They had talked about the universities they both went to, and what courses they were taking. After the formalities, they recalled the memories from their high school years. They were actually pretty good friends in high school. A friendship that may or may not have been based on flirting and suggestions to a relationship. But it never escalated by the time it was senior graduation. Reiner was disappointed, to say the least. But maybe..this could lead to them continuing from where they left off?

The buzzing from his phone startles him from his day dreaming.

' _I'm not at the library. I'm at my friend's apartment. I left hours ago, Reiner. I even told you where I was going. Did you not notice because you were so blind to the world past your laptop?_ '

Wow, what's up his ass? Reiner rolls his eyes. Bertholdt usually was more blunt and assertive through text, so it was understandable, he supposes. Why was he so upset though? It didn't seem like a big deal. 

' _oh, my bad, sorry. Uh, okay, so are you coming back tonight? Who's house you at? ;)_ ' Reiner mentally cringes at his attempt to lighten the attitude with Bertholdt. But hey, he didn't have much leg room to crack a tasteful joke. He's given a reply after a long five minutes. Which was strange because usually Bertholdt was quick when it came to texting with him.

' _I'm at my friend Annie's house. I'll return soon._ '

Reiner blinks a few times. He only knows one Annie, and she goes to the same college as Christa. He doesn't hang out with her often, and the last time he did was two weeks ago. Sometimes, he felt like Annie was more annoyed with him than she should be.

' _Annie Leonhardt?_ '

' _Yes...do you know her?_ '

Reiner almost laughs at how ironic that is. He quickly types a reply.

' _yeah she was my best friend through high school. How do you know her?_ '

' _Oh...I see.. She was my only friend in middle school. I went to Trost high, rather than Shiganshina high. We kept in touch after middle school, though._ '

Reading how Annie was his only friend brought a frown to his lips. Maybe it was logical, because Reiner doesn't even recall him from his middle school years. He does remember Annie though, but they weren't friends at the time.

' _Did you go to maria middle?_ '

' _Yes. I was aware of you back then. I only remembered you after becoming your roommate._ '

Reiner feels like shit, because Bertholdt remembers him, but he doesn't remember Bertholdt. That's lame. Maybe they could have been best friends, all three of them together. Reiner recalls how he was too involved with his own group of friends and their shenanigans. He was apart of a group of boys that always caused problems in class. God, those were cringe-worthy memories. Seeing as he was around those kinds of people, it was understandable that he would overlook someone like Bertholdt.

Sighing, Reiner lays back into his bed. He holds his phone above his face as he replies.

' _Dang, really? well. tell Annie I said hi, then. we should all meet up sometime and just hang, that would be cool_ '

' _Okay. See you later, Reiner._ '

Momentarily, Reiner is put-off by the sudden dismiss, but he knows he should just let Bertholdt be with Annie. He tosses his phone aside and stands. Maybe he could clean up a little bit as an apology for his friend.

\----------

“You didn't tell me you were bunking with Reiner”, Annie states as soon as Bertholdt lets her know Reiner says hi. Bertholdt gives a weak shrug as he turns off his phone after sending the last text. He looks at her tiredly, and she stares back, demanding a reason.

“It just..never came up.”, he says as he shrugs again, standing from his seat by the counter island in the small kitchen of Annie's apartment. She had been making hot chocolate for both of them when he was texting Reiner, so it had given him an opportunity to reply. Not that he felt so eager to. He had left to visit Annie in an attempt to avoid his oblivious imbecile of a roommate. Well, not an imbecile. Reiner wasn't an imbecile. Bertholdt sighs. 

“Is he treating you good?”, Annie demands, turning back to the hot chocolate when she grows bored of looking at her friend. Bertholdt rolls his eyes, “Why does he do the 'treating'? Why am I the one that has to be treated good?” Annie casts him an unamused expression. He throws his hands up, “I just don't know why I'm the one that has to be cared for! I could handle him if he were to be a selfish, demanding roommate!” Annie still looks at him with half-lidded, unamused eyes and a frown. He sticks his tongue out at her, and he notices how her lips perk a little bit. She looks away back to the hot chocolate, slowly stirring it. 

“Yeah. He's fine.”, Bertholdt grumbles, obsessively picking at a loose thread to his navy blue sweater. “What's upsetting you.”, Annie states more than asks, not even bothering to ask if he was okay. She could already tell. His tone of voice and body language was too obvious. 

Bertholdt drops his green eyes sadly to the linoleum of the floor. He remains silent for a long moment, hoping she lets it go, but when she glances at him with a raised brow, he sighs quietly again. “Nothin'.”, he mumbles, glaring at the island counter. Annie huffs. 

“Fine. I'm just annoyed because he..I don't know. Just Reiner. He just annoys me sometimes.”, Bertholdt sputters, unsure of the reason himself. He fiddles with his fingers, tempted to bite at them. But Annie always chides him for that habit, hoping he would quit it, so he tried to quell the urge around her. “That is very vague, Bertholdt. How does he annoy you?”, Annie prods, turning to hand him a mug of warm hot chocolate. He cups his long, cold fingers around it and stares down into the swirling brown liquid.

Before he replies, she touches him on the shoulder, earning his gaze, and then she walks away, out of the kitchen, and enters the living room to take a modest seat on the leather couch facing the TV. He follows quietly, and takes a seat beside her. But he's careful not to sit too close. He did sit closer and closer as the years had progressed, though. Anyways, he tries to think on the question.

The answer comes a little too easily.

“I..want him to acknowledge me more.”

She quirks a brow at him as she takes a little sip of her hot chocolate, and he blushes furiously despite the mild suggestion to his words. “What do you mean by 'acknowledge'?”, Annie asks in a way that makes him think she really cares. He feels a little comforted by the thought.

He sighs a little bit, and pauses to take a drink from his mug. It's really hot and it makes him bare his teeth and hiss. She snickers (she was close to him, so she was more open to expressing herself around him), and he glares at her. Then she quiets and waits for a reply.

“I mean like. He...he is being kind to me anyways. He lets me hang out with him and his friends, and I just ...I don't know.”, he begins, and then miserably trails off, not wanting to admit what he wants. Annie gives him the same unamused, knowing look. He feels his ears burn as he quickly says, “I want him to hang out with _me_ more. Not with his friends lingering around..us...” Well, aside from studying that is. When they studied, they usually _focused on the studying_ , so there wasn't much interaction during that time, unless Reiner needed help on something Bertholdt was able to help him with. Nodding, she accepts that answer.

“So just ask him. If you want to be his friend, then initiate that friendship. Bertholdt, for as long as I've known you..you've waited for people to approach _you_ , and you never approached _them_. So make him the first person you approach.”

Bertholdt is quiet after her words, and stares down at his mug in his lap. He knows she's right. But he just feels anxious at the thought of it. He could never randomly stroll up to someone and strike up a conversation, because just considering such a thing would make him coil up in dread and nervousness. Annie was the one that had greeted him one day during lunch, and insisted she sit with him. She was the one that kept their friendship going. Maybe Annie knew Bertholdt too well. She read him like a book.

“Okay.”, Bertholdt answers a long moment later, and then they continue to drink their hot chocolate in peace. Eventually, she asks if he wants to watch an episode of Doctor Who. He doesn't really mind, so he just goes along with it. Reiner could wait longer.

\----------

Its an hour and a half since their little texting conversation when Bertholdt returns. It's late, and the sky is dark. Reiner had been actually working at his desk in the room, with only his lamp on. So the room had been dimly lit when the jingling of the door's lock sounded. He nearly pissed his pants at the sudden loud commotion. When he realizes its Bertholdt and not some guy trying to desperately get in, he relaxes. Then Bertholdt pushes the stubborn door open with a shove of his shoulder.

“Reiner, hi.”, Bertholdt says when he steps in. Reiner looks up at him from his text book and offers a grin, “Hey, Bertl, how was it?”

Bertholdt worries at his lip as he folds his scarf and sets it on his desk, “It was fine.” He lifts his gaze to his roommate, and notices the books and papers on his desk. “How has studying been?”, he muses as he works on removing his coat.

“I'm almost dead. I'm chugging along on fumes right now.”, Reiner replies with a groan, and collapses on top of his papers. He hears Bertholdt laugh a little bit, and he sits up to look at his tall roommate again. A light perk of a smile is on his thin lips, and it relieves Reiner. So he wasn't angry at him?

“So, hey, its kind of ironic how we have the same best friend but never met before.”

Bertholdt's face falls at him mentioning it, and Reiner almost literally smacks himself on the head for it. Bertholdt takes a seat on his bed, hands in his lap, and nods a little bit, “Yeah. Well we were friends with her at different times, so..”

“We're friends with her right now! So yeah. You're not completely correct in that fact, my friend.”, Reiner says, pushing his seat away from his desk with a forced grin on his face. He was good at recovering a light atmosphere. It seemed to work because Bertholdt laughs again. He nods with a little smile, “Right.”

Then its silent for a long tense moment, before Bertholdt raises his gaze from his lap to Reiner. He looks at him for a brief moment, and after realizing Reiner was looking back at him too, he quickly drops his gaze again. “Bertholdt, do you have a favorite memory?”, Reiner suddenly asks, and Bertholdt raises his gaze timidly to him once more.

He raises a brow. “How come you've been asking me random questions recently..?”, Bertholdt muses, and Reiner looks away, probably embarrassed. He shrugs and twirls his pencil around his fingers, “I 'unno. Just curious, I guess.”

Bertholdt hums in an exhale, and thinks about it. It doesn't really take him that long to think of it.

“I had a dog a while ago, when I was a young boy. He was a bull terrier, a white one. I liked him a lot, and he liked me. We would go on walks together in the forest by my house. We lived outside of town. When I would collect pretty rocks and plants, he would sniff around and do his own thing. When I would get lost, he was able to guide me back. I guess by his sense of smell, but it always awed me how he was able to tell if I was lost. And when we would get back, my mother...um”, Bertholdt begins to describe it, yet he pauses after the thought of his mother, and it chokes him up a little bit, but he's able to continue, “she would fret over us, but mainly me, and then she would make me hot chocolate because I would get so cold from walking around for a while out there. I would cuddle with Mischa, my dog, in front of the fire as I drank my hot chocolate.”

Bertholdt was staring at his feet on the floor as he describes it, and he smiles sadly, feeling nostalgic. He looks up at Reiner, and sees him watching him from his seat with an awed expression upon his features. His arms were folded over the back of the chair with his chin resting atop them. 

Reiner sits back, “That sounds really nice. Where do your parents live? Do they still live in that same house outside of your town?” Bertholdt smiles a little bit and rubs at the sleeve of his sweater absentmindedly.

“My dad lives in the same house, yeah. I will probably visit him during our breaks.” 

Reiner blinks a little bit at that, and then he asks with a curious tone, “Oh. Did your parents divorce?” Bertholdt shakes his head, “No. My mother is dead.” Reiner's mouth falls open at that and he looks so upset as he hurriedly says, “Oh shit, dude, I'm sorry. I didn't even know.”

Bertholdt forces a few laughs and shakes his head, “No, it's okay. And I know you didn't know, that's why I told you. You don't have to apologize for anything. It's not like I'm going to burst into tears at the mention of my deceased mother. That was so long ago.” Reiner still looks startled and upset, so Bertholdt averts the attention from the discouraging topic.

“What about you? Your favorite memory?”

Reiner pauses, and then he says instantly, seemingly distracted from the saddening information from before, “Playing football in my senior year of high school. It was really awesome having fun with my teammates and kicking other schools' butts. And I was the MVP, too. I got all the chicks.” Reiner jut his chin up at that and flexed his arms and Bertholdt smiled softly.

“Not all of them.”

Reiner stops with his stupid flexing and looks at him. He drops his arms and laughs, “Yeah, not all of them.” A tense moment passes, of them looking at each other, and then Bertholdt exhales before he pushes from the bed. He paces over to his dresser, and Reiner watches curiously as Bertholdt grabs his pyjamas from his dresser. He drops the articles of clothing on his bed and begins to pull up his shirt, so Reiner turns away to focus on his work again. 

The thought of Bertholdt's mother dying, supposedly so long ago (how long ago was 'so long ago'? Did she die when he was a child?), lingered in Reiner's thoughts. He wondered if Bertholdt missed her. What a silly thing to wonder. Bertholdt's face was an expression of fondness when he talked of her before, so he probably does. Reiner feels sad as he listens to Bertholdt get ready for bed. Bertholdt always went to bed early. It was another thing Reiner learned of during the time of them sharing a dorm room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** I've noticed that the fandom usually portrays Bertholdt to be a silent, moe guy (and I like that too!), but I noticed that even if he is quiet in the anime/manga, he typically has this stern, intense expression on. And I was thinking that maybe he has something to say behind that face, so I think that if he was with someone he was comfortable with, he would be able to express himself more openly. Like with Annie. So his attitudes and words may seem OOC but I just see him that way (~￣▽￣)~


	4. Chapter 4

It was ten minutes until the end of the class, and Bertholdt was both dreading it and looking forward to it. He was zoning out from the lesson, idly taking notes but not really processing it. He sighs deeply, head propped up in a hand as he stares tiredly at the professor and his strange cravat. He looked just as bored as Bertholdt felt. When he reached up to write something on the board, he had to stand on his tippy toes, and Bertholdt heard a student laugh. Instantly, the mean-looking professor whipped around and gave the guy the most dreadful glare. That shut him up. 

Bertholdt was mildly amused over that for a little bit, but then he grew bored again. He usually didn't let the tediousness get to him, but he just was so tired of it all. It's been seven weeks since the start of the semester. At the thought of many more weeks following, Bertholdt dropped his head onto his notebook that was suffocated in his hurried note-taking. This just wasn't his day. Luckily he had a long break between this and the next class. And if he wasn't mistaken, so did Reiner.

He lifts his head at that thought and attempts to pay attention. It doesn't really matter though, because the professor closes the lesson smoothly before dismissing the class. Bertholdt secures his scarf around his neck before he grabs his things and scoots out of that row of seats, making his way through the other students.

When he makes it outside, he pulls out his phone to send a text to Reiner.

' _Meet me at Starbucks?_ '

Once he sends it, he begins towards the direction of the coffee shop at the corner of the campus. He receives a text in reply almost instantly. He brings his phone out to read it.

' _sure. see you there, Bertl._ '

Bertholdt smiles at that.

 

He finds himself beating Reiner to Starbucks. There is a line of students already there, but its expected. He steps up, and checks his phone for texts. Oh, there is one from Annie.

' _Did you ask him yet_ '

Bertholdt's lips purse into a frown and he types out a reply.

' _No, Annie, not yet. Well. I did just ask him to meet me at Starbucks, if that counts._ '

He's given a reply within twenty seconds.

' _That's a start. Just a few more visits to Starbucks and maybe he'll let you in his pants_ '

Bertholdt's eyes widen after reading that and his cheeks flush a deep red. He furiously texts back, ' _ANNIE I DON'T WANT TO GET IN HIS PANTS._ ' 

' _They would be too big for you anyways. He's got a huge muscley ass._ '

Bertholdt shakes his head and doesn't even bother replying. He puts his phone away. He realizes he's second in line. It only takes a moment for the girl in front of him to place her order, and then he's first. So he approaches the girl at the cashier with the light..orange-ish hair and big eyes. She smiles sweetly at him and asks what he would like. After ordering a caramel frap and a pumpkin spice latte (Reiner's favorite), he gives her his name (he only ever says Bert. They always fail to spell his full name), and then takes a seat at a small table in the corner. He stares out the glass that separates the interior of the small store from the windy fall evening, and admires the light red trees that are scattered across the grass. Students pass by with cold-bitten faces. 

Its only a few minutes more until he spots Reiner approaching the front door. He's looking at his phone, only until he actually has to open the door. He steps in and looks around for Bertholdt. Bertholdt waves at him a little bit when his eyes land on him. Reiner grins as soon as he spots him, and then walks over to take the seat across from him.

“Hey, Bertl. You got me the pumpkin latte, right? You better have or else I'm going to raise some complaints”, Reiner greets him as he sets his phone down on the tiny circular table and plucks off his gloves. Bertholdt offers him a soft smile, “Yes, I did.” Reiner looks at him with a pleased expression before placing his pink hands onto his face. “God, its too cold for the fall.”, Reiner mutters as he attempts to warm his cold hands with his cheeks. 

“I don't know why you always get the caramel frap during this time of the year. Its too cold to be drinking cold drinks.”, Reiner says as he pulls off his coat and drapes it over the back of the chair. He's wearing a plaid flannel shirt with a tight black shirt underneath. Bertholdt looks at him, and Reiner notices, quirking a brow at him with a friendly smirk on his lips. 

Reiner settles in his seat as he asks, “So how was...shit. What's his last name..um. The short scary guy. Did he throw a marker at anyone today?” Bertholdt chuckles a little bit and shakes his head, “No, but he almost did. A guy laughed at how he had to stand on his toes to reach the white board, and that didn't please him.” Reiner laughs aloud at that, and it makes Bertholdt feel warm. He smiles a little wider as Reiner shakes his head.

“I'm glad I don't have him.”, Reiner says between chuckles and then Bertholdt's shortened name is called. Bertholdt excuses himself to approach the counter. He gives the cute girl a tiny, thankful smile as he grabs the drinks and takes them back to the table. He sets the PSL in front of Reiner, and Reiner thanks him before curling his fingers around the warm cup.

Bertholdt sighs as he takes a seat, placing his caramel frap on the table as well. 

“I could pay you back some other time. I don't have my wallet on me right now.”, Reiner says as he looks over at Bertholdt's face, and grins a little. Bertholdt glances at him and nods. The latte wasn't that expensive, but every dollar counts when it comes to Uni. Bertholdt has heard the frightful stories of living off of instant noodles, and he doesn't want to have to come to that fate.

They sit there for a moment, quiet in relaxation. Reiner is taking careful sips of his hot drink, and Bertholdt gratefully tastes the sweetness of his frappuccino. “The downside of having a hot drink is waiting for it to cool.”, Reiner grumbles as he watches Bertholdt enjoy his drink.

Bertholdt gives him a teasing smile as he sets his frap aside to withdraw his phone. He felt it vibrate earlier when he went to retrieve the drinks.

' _sometimes I wonder how my friend from middle school could have ended up developing a crush on my friend from high school. The world is so ironic._ '

Instantly, Bertholdt blushes and feels mild irritation. It was hardly a crush. He lets Annie know through a desperate text back. 

“You texting Annie?”, Reiner asks, being a snoop. Bertholdt glances up at him and nods. He hopes Reiner doesn't press the matter further. But of course Reiner says, “Tell her I said she should do something about her big nose.” Bertholdt quirks a brow at him, and Reiner merely laughs. “She'll get pissed, but she can't hit me back this time.”, Reiner says between his light laughs. Then he takes a long drink of his latte. Bertholdt sighs.

' _And Reiner says hi. He told me to tell you something insulting but I refuse to pass it on to you._ '

The reply he gets is so quick he almost sighs again. ' _Oh yeah? What did that block head say?_ ' Bertholdt gives Reiner a glare, and Reiner flashes him a stupid grin. 

' _He said something about your nose but I disagreed with it._ '

' _Tell him I said he should get breast reduction._ '

“Annie says you should get breast reduction.”, Bertholdt says, having no problem with repeating that to Reiner. Reiner looks absolutely offended, it almost makes Bertholdt laugh. Reiner huffs and then sets a hand out on the table. Confused, Bertholdt looks at him with a furrowed brow. When Reiner curls his fingers in for a 'gimme' gesture, Bertholdt shakes his head. Reiner gives him an unamused look, and Bertholdt relents with a heaved exhale. Setting the phone in his hand, Bertholdt worries if he'll scroll up through the texts. 

Reiner hurriedly types back a reply that no doubt would be offensive. Some angry noises come from him a moment later, and this continues for a while, so Bertholdt looks out the window as he takes drinks of his frap.

“Annie's dumb”, Reiner says a long while later, setting Bertholdt's phone on the table. 

“That'll surely put a dent in her ego”, Bertholdt mutters as he snatches his phone. Reiner takes an irritated drink of his latte. Then he stands.

“Walk back to the dorm with me”, he demands, looking down at Bertholdt with an agitated expression still upon his features, and then he turns to begin towards the entrance, half-empty Starbucks cup in his grasp. Bertholdt stands, caramel frappuccino in hand, and follows after him. 

When outside, Bertholdt ties his scarf closer around his neck and walks alongside Reiner down the stone pathway. The wind brushes his short black hair around and it's mildly annoying. But Reiner seems more annoyed than him. His brow is furrowed and mouth in a frown.

“What did she say that upset you so much?”, Bertholdt gently asks, looking down at his friend. Reiner sighs and runs a hand through his short blond hair. He shrugs, and doesn't speak for a moment.

“She said Christa told her about how we've been talking again, and then teased me about it, saying that I have no chance because she has a girlfriend. A _girlfriend_ , Bertholdt! What am I supposed to do now?”, Reiner rants a little bit, throwing his latte-less hand up in anger. Bertholdt stares at his feet as they walk. He doesn't speak for a moment, hoping the tight, uncomfortable feeling in his chest would go away.

“Do what you intended to do from the start?”, Bertholdt mumbles. Reiner looks at him with a furrowed brow, “What do you mean?”

Bertholdt doesn't look at him. “Be her friend. I thought you were only trying to 'save' the relationship, not escalate it.”, he retorts, keeping his olive green eyes stubbornly fixed in front of him. He picks at the side of the lid of his cup with a finger. Reiner is quiet a moment.

“Unless that was just a way to get to the prize”, Bertholdt says, eyes raising to the cloudy sky. Reiner scoffs. That earns Bertholdt's gaze. 

“Nah, man. I just..I don't know. I just wasn't looking for a way to fuck her. I like her. She's really cool. I wanted to be with her, not in her.”, Reiner says with mild amusement in his tone, before he takes a drink of his coffee. Bertholdt remains silent. They're approaching the entrance to their dorm building, so he didn't have to provide a reply. Reiner is kind enough to step ahead to hold open the door for him. 

“Thanks for the drink”, Reiner says with a light tone, after they had reached their dorm room and Bertholdt was unlocking it. Bertholdt nods, and then shoves open the door. He pulls off his scarf and doesn't bother to fold it like he usually does, and simply tosses it onto his desk. As Reiner steps in and begins to remove his coat and gloves, Bertholdt shuts the door behind them. Turning back, he watches quietly as Reiner puts his gear away before taking a seat on his bed with his latte. He pulls up his laptop, and Bertholdt takes that as a cue to grab his book bag and leave the room, escaping to the lounge. 

\----------

In the morning, Bertholdt wakes up without the assistance of his alarm. He had blearily blinked his eyes open to a dimly lit room, the sunlight coming in from between the closed drapes of the small window. He had stared at the wall he was facing for a moment. Then he realized a half of his body was drooping off his bed. When he attempts to pull himself up onto the bed entirely, his body doesn't cooperate and his hand slips, making him fall onto the cold floor with his blanket under him. Sighing, he decided he hates this day so far.

He can hear Reiner snoring obnoxiously loud as he tiredly stands and gathers his fallen blanket onto the bed. Heavily, he collapses back onto his bed. He has almost an hour left to sleep upon glancing at his alarm clock, but that's a feat almost impossible when sharing a room with Reiner. This is why he goes to bed before the other. 

The thundering snoring keeps him wide awake, disrupting any soothing thoughts that meander through his mind. He curses under his breath and takes the effort to sit up, and throw his pillow at the lump of Reiner's sleeping body across the room. It lands perfectly on Reiner's head, momentarily silencing his snoring. After a moment's pause, it comes back, but with an even higher volume. Bertholdt groans aloud and then stands from his bed. May as well get up. He begins to get dressed in a lazy outfit, after deciding he was going to go downstairs to get a packet of Poptarts for breakfast from the vending machine in the lobby. 

His hair is a messy, but all he does to fix it is to smooth his fingers over it in an attempt to tame the locks after a night of ridiculous sleeping positions, no doubt. They are stubborn. Its too early for him to care. He trudges out the room after tugging on his shoes. He doesn't bother being quiet with shutting the door behind him.

 

When he returns, he finds Reiner missing from his bed. It's really confusing at first, but the telltale sound of a toilet flushing solves the mystery of the missing Reiner. Said Reiner trudges out of their tiny bathroom (which only held a sink and a toilet. The showers were in the main bathroom of the building), with messy short hair and a hand rubbing over his face.

“Oh. Bertl.”, Reiner says in a gruffy voice when he notices his roommate standing there with bed head and a packet of Poptarts. Bertholdt looks at him with a look of annoyance. Reiner takes a heavy seat on his bed, “Why are you lookin' at me like that?” Bertholdt takes off a shoe and throws it at Reiner, earning a startled noise from the blond. The shoe lands beside him on the bed.

“Learn to control your snoring!”, Bertholdt complains as he approaches him to claim his shoe again. Reiner, being the butthole he is, begins to give throaty laughs as Bertholdt takes a seat on his own bed to angrily open his Poptarts.

“I'll do that once you handle your ridiculous sleeping positions.”, Reiner retorts with a quiet voice. Bertholdt looks over at him, and doesn't find himself angry anymore. Reiner seems to be more pliable and quiet when he just woke up. Bertholdt blushes and takes a bite of his Poptart. Reiner rubs at his eyes and then collapses onto his bed once more.

Its silent for a long while, besides Bertholdt's chewing and Reiner's breathing. Then Reiner speaks. “Hey...it's way too cold to sleep again. Bertholdt, come share this bed with me, you're probably warm.”, Reiner says from his bed, hidden under his blanket. Bertholdt stares over at his roommate in the dim light of the room.

“No.”, he says, despite the urge to comply, with his cheeks flushed. Reiner grumbles something at him. And then that's that. Reiner falls asleep and begins his boisterous snoring once more. Bertholdt sighs and finishes his Poptarts in the dark room, listening to Reiner snore.


	5. Chapter 5

Bertholdt had been reviewing his notes on his bed, legs crossed and head dipped down as he stared at the never ending words, when Reiner burst into the room and declared there were to a be a party commencing at Ymir's parents' house. That earned Bertholdt's brief attention, head lifting to stare at his openly excited roommate with a tightly furrowed brow. Why does that deserve a loud entrance? 

“So?”, Bertholdt retorts, before returning his gaze to his notebook. Reiner takes a heavy, bed-shaking seat beside Bertholdt. Bertholdt sighs and places his notebook aside, realizing this was one of those times Reiner required his full attention. He sarcastically turned towards him and bat his eyelids at him. Reiner was grinning.

“So it means we have to go!”

“Why do _we_ \--”

“Christa will be there, and I want you to meet her, too.”

Bertholdt gives him an unamused look. He rolled his eyes when Reiner gestured at him with his hands and a quirk of his thin eyebrow. “I thought we established that Christa has a girlfriend, Reiner.”, Bertholdt sighs, shaking his head. Reiner huffs, “Well, I'm not giving up. Plus, it'll be fun. I know Christa will like you, you're likeable.”

_I don't want her to like me_ is what Bertholdt immediately thinks with annoyance to himself, but then he glances at Reiner when he finishes speaking. He stares at him and is given a small smile. “Will there be drinking? Because I won't be participating in illegal drinking, you know.”, Bertholdt grumbles. Reiner laughs, “Of course there will be. Ymir is throwing the party for fuck's sake, of course she's going to include alcohol. But hey, you don't have to acknowledge it.” Bertholdt doesn't even know who Ymir is, but he has a bad impression on her already.

“Why is there a party anyways? There hasn't even been a midterm yet, and you're already killing your brain cells.”, Bertholdt mutters as he reaches for his notebook. Reiner scoffs and stands, unsettling the bed once more. He stands before Bertholdt and crosses his arms, earning his olive green eyes in a wary look.

“If there's a chance I'll get to see a drunk Christa, I'm gonna go to a damn party, even if it's random and early in the year.”, Reiner claims, giving Bertholdt a look that suggests that he should have known this. Bertholdt sighs and waves him off, and Reiner laughs lightly before he leaves Bertholdt be to attend to his welcoming bed and his laptop that promised conversations with Christa. 

Bertholdt attempts to focus on his notes again. Reiner always disturbed him when he was trying to be productive. But upon hearing the obnoxious tapping of Reiner's fingers and his occasional laughs, it only distracted him further. And annoyed him. Bertholdt was rubbing at his eyes with impatience as Reiner gave stupid giggles. 

Doesn't Reiner see there isn't a chance that he could be with Christa? She's dating a _girl_. Doesn't that say enough? Or was Reiner that obtuse? It seemed pointless. But whatever. Reiner could waste all the time he wants with attempting to woo a girl that is already charmed. Bertholdt could care less.

After about ten minutes of sitting there, trying to focus on his damn notes again, listening to Reiner chat with Christa, Bertholdt couldn't tolerate it anymore. So he stood and yanked on his skinny jeans over his boxers, before pulling on his coat over his long sleeved shirt. After grabbing his notebook and shoving it in his bag along with his other books, he yanks his bag onto his shoulder, grabs his scarf, and pushes out the door, not bothering to let Reiner know where he was off to. The last time he told him while he was lost in a world with Christa, Reiner didn't even acknowledge him. 

His mood was rotten as he begins down the hallway towards the staircase. 

 

When he reaches the library, he feels a little better. The Uni library holds a considerable amount of students, but of course, that's typical. He hopes a computer is open so he could listen to music while working. Well. All he was doing was looking at his notes, so he wouldn't have to stay here long. But, when he's done he could aimlessly browse the Internet. It was better than being cooped up in a room with lovestruck Reiner. As he makes his way past the tables of students towards the long rows of computers, he recognizes Marco sitting on a couch by the wall of the computers. He's kind of easy to spot, so Bertholdt noticed him instantly. 

“Oh, Bertholdt”, Marco says in pleasant surprise when Bertholdt approaches him. Bertholdt doesn't really feel like smiling so all he says is, “Hello. Mind if I join you?” Marco nods (people always did the opposite of what they meant when it came to that question, and Marco wasn't an exception), and pulls his bag off the empty seat off the couch. Bertholdt sets his own heavy bag down and takes a seat with a sigh. He melts into the cushions. Marco is quiet a moment, and Bertholdt doesn't mind it. He prefers comfortable silence rather than conversation.

But eventually, Marco's cheerful, friendly personality overcame the debate of remaining quiet. He always felt like he should produce a light conversation.

“How come you're in the library? I mean..besides the obvious.”, Marco speaks in a quiet tone out of the blue, stirring Bertholdt from staring at the ceiling. Bertholdt looks over at him. Marco offers him a light smile, and Bertholdt gives a perk of a smile, but it dies.

“To escape my dumb roommate. You?”

Marco hums. He's tapping his pen on his paper as he says, “I'm just glancing at the book from Mr. Bossard. Taking notes. I'm typically a nerd when it comes to note taking.” Bertholdt couldn't help but smile at that. He should be reviewing the book too. He still had time, though. Marco laughs nervously, “And I may be escaping someone as well.”

Bertholdt looks over at him, quirking a brow in question. Marco is fiddling with his pen in his fingers rather than hitting it against his paper. His eye is downcast from Bertholdt, fixed on his lap instead. “I think I upset Jean.”, he mutters, brow furrowing. Bertholdt isn't surprised it has to do with Jean, but that doesn't lessen his concern.

“What happened?”

Marco laughs again, but its strained. He shrugs, “It's so stupid. He was fighting with Eren again and I told him to let it go, that he should stop getting in arguments. And he, well. He yelled at me to fuck off and that I shouldn't be defending Eren. That was stupid on my part, I guess.” Bertholdt frowns.

“He's in the wrong Marco...he was just taking his anger out on you. You were doing the right thing.”, Bertholdt says gently, eyes fixed on his friend. Marco hums quietly. Then he looks over at Bertholdt, “I'm sorry. I shouldn't be dumping this on you.” Then he drops his gaze from him once more. Bertholdt shakes his head and forces a small reassuring smile, “It's fine.” He pauses, and then his smile lessens, “I could..tell you why I'm avoiding Reiner, so we're even.”

Marco looks up at him with curiosity. 

Bertholdt flushes a little bit in the cheeks and rubs at the back of his neck as he says with hesitation, “Well..he's been kind of obsessively talking with this girl on Facebook, and like...I guess it just gets on my nerves all the time. So I didn't want to deal with it, and left.” That makes Bertholdt feel like a loser. What a stupid reason to leave. He stares at his feet, feeling embarrassed.

“...Don't you think..that maybe its jealousy?”, Marco offers in a gentle voice, looking at Bertholdt with a soft expression. Bertholdt looks up at him with an expressionless face. He's quiet before he shakes his head, “No. He's just really distracting when he gets like that.” Marco pauses, and then nods a little bit.

“Anyways”, Bertholdt says, and then grabs his bag, “I don't know Jean, but I think he will feel bad about what he said and will apologize. It seems like you guys are close.” He stands and looks over at Marco, seeing him blush and shake his head, gaze on his lap.

“Uhm...I don't know”, Marco mumbles, fidgeting with his pen again. Bertholdt smiles a little bit, and then says, “See you later, Marco. I'll let you get back to your note taking.” Marco raises his eyes to him and nods with a smile on his lips, “Bye, Bertholdt.”

 

The first thing Bertholdt listens to when he claims a computer is The Police, his favorite band. Their music always made him feel better.

\----------

As the days had progressed, Bertholdt realized that maybe Reiner was investing too much time into talking with Christa. He seemed to be focusing less on his studies, and more on that girl. Bertholdt spoke his mind one day after Reiner had been talking with Christa on the phone (which was the most annoying thing ever).

Once Reiner put his phone away and stood from the bed, he said to Bertholdt, “I'm meeting with Christa later today. After her class, she said she'll drive over from Sina.” Bertholdt couldn't care less, and he nearly says this. But he doesn't want to make Reiner feel bad, so he just makes an uninterested noise in the back of his throat.

“I don't know about you Bertholdt, but I think Christa swings on both swing sets if you get what I mean.”, Reiner says before he groans mid-stretch, arms raising, pulling his shirt up a little bit to reveal his lower abdomen and the trail of hair breaking past the waistband of his sweatpants. Bertholdt closes his eyes in an attempt to quell his desire to throw anything at him. Lately, Bertholdt had felt more urges to throw things when he was around Reiner. 

“How about actually getting your money's worth out of Uni, rather than wasting it on flirting with a girl that probably thinks you're only being friendly? Don't you have that exam for your class coming up?”, Bertholdt retorts as he glares at his book, bringing his legs up onto his bed to shield himself behind his knees. Reiner is quiet a moment and then he says, “Christ, Bertholdt, just tell me if you want me to shut up.” Bertholdt's fingers tighten on the cover of the book and he nearly chucks it at him. Fuck, he almost did, too.

“Fine. I want you to shut up, Reiner.”

Reiner huffs and then begins to pull on his shoes after taking a seat on his bed once more. Bertholdt feels a hot anger in his mind and a tightening pain in his belly as Reiner yanks on his coat and stomps out the room. Although, Reiner says, “Whatever. I don't have to deal with this shit. My friends will probably be more encouraging than you.”, before he shuts the door behind him. Bertholdt wonders why Reiner _even cares_ about what he thinks. He feels his impatient anger swell inside, fueling his defending thoughts. 

Reiner doesn't even have to tell him about it. Bertholdt would rather him talk about Christa to his stupid friends than himself. Its better this way. Bertholdt honestly doesn't give a shit. Well. Until he feels tears well in his eyes, and then he really does care. He throws his book onto the floor, and it lands with a smack. He sighs and hides his face behind his knees, curling his arms around his shins. Bertholdt sniffs. Reiner was a dumbass, anyways.

\----------

The next day, Bertholdt stresses out over what he said to Reiner throughout his classes, and fails spectacularly to take proper notes. After Mr. Bossard's lecture, Berhtoldt miserably asked Marco to borrow his notes. Marco instantly recognized the obvious signs of distress from Bertholdt, and had tried to comfort his friend with gentle questions. Bertholdt merely brushed him off, but in a friendly way so Marco wouldn't be offended. Marco understood, and let him be. 

In the morning, Bertholdt had gotten up earlier than Reiner (not that that's any different than usual), took a shower, and returned to the dorm room to quickly get dressed and grab his things. Then he left sooner than usual for his classes. Since he was early, he had to loiter in the library. But it was better than facing his roommate. 

During the break between his classes, Bertholdt trudged his way to Starbucks. He so needed some coffee right now. And if he's not mistaken, caramel frappuccinos had caffeine. 

It was actually raining a little harder than the usual drizzle, so Bertholdt had pulled the hood to his coat over his head, and hurried his trudging. The grass and stone pathways were darkened with the liquid. The trees' bright orange leaves were shaking from the impacts of the raindrops. Bertholdt kept his gaze fixed on his feet and the small puddles he passed on the pathway, until he reached the protection of the canopy above the Starbucks entrance. 

When he enters, he finds there to be a lack of a line. Thank god. He quickly orders a caramal frap (with extra caramel) from the girl with the pale orange hair, and takes a heavy seat at the same small table in the corner. His hair was messy from the hood. He could see his reflection in the wide window beside him, and attempted to tame the locks that stuck up. He gave up after a few tries. His hair hated him.

Glancing around the store, he finds there is barely any people. Which is strange, because it is a chilly day. He sees a girl with her wavy brunette hair tied up, with quite a few Starbucks snacks spread over her table. She was swiping her finger over what looked to be an iPad, as she munched on a lemon bread slice. 

Bertholdt also noticed Reiner perched at his own table at the other end of the store, a few feet from the counter. He forced himself not to dwell on it. Seeing as there wasn't a big rush, his drink was finished fairly soon. There was only about five people in the store anyways, including the staff. He stands once his name is called (fuck, Reiner would know he's here, now), stubbornly keeping his eyes fixed ahead of him as he approaches the counter.

“Thank you”, Bertholdt says softly to Petra (finally he bothered to look at her name tag), and is given a smile when he grabs his frap. He hurries to his table, and takes the seat that keeps his back to where Reiner was sitting. The caramel tastes so lovely on his tongue, but he barely appreciates it. He scratches at the wood of the table as he sips at his coffee. He feels his phone vibrate, and his heart flips out on him.

When he pulls it out to glance at the text, his heart seizes when he sees the contact. It was from “Rei Rei”. Bertholdt sighs as he reads it. “ _mind if I sit with you?_ ”, it read, and Bertholdt doesn't really find himself disliking the thought. He felt guilty anyways, and if he turned Reiner away, he would feel worse. 

' _No._ ', is all Bertholdt texts back.

He hears the telltale sound of a chair scraping the tile of the floor and then heavy footsteps beginning towards him. Bertholdt breaks into a nervous sweat when Reiner sits across from him with a blank, set expression. His hair is obviously wet, with it's color darker and strands sticking together. Bertholdt fights to keep his small smile down. Reiner looks so silly with his hair wet, for some reason. 

“Hey”, Reiner greets him, and Bertholdt nods in return, taking a drink of his frappuccino, afraid of saying something stupid. Bertholdt looks down at Reiner's hands fiddling with his Starbucks cup. There's a PSL written in black marker on the exterior. Bertholdt nearly smiles again. Which was strange, because he was really nervous right now.

“Dude, I'm sorry for what I said the other day. It was really out of line. I know I've been an annoying prick lately.”, Reiner says randomly, earning Bertholdt's startled green eyes. Reiner's expression is of distraught. Bertholdt's heart warms once he realizes that Reiner felt as bad as he had. He's also relieved he didn't have to say it first.

“No..you had every reason to say that. I'm sorry, too. I was just, um.”, Bertholdt begins quietly, and blushes deeply in the face. He was about to say a thing he would deeply regret. Reiner quirks a brow at him, a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. His hands had ceased fiddling with his cup. 

“You were what?”, Reiner prods, and Bertholdt shakes his head, dipping his head down to hide his face. Reiner didn't press him further, recognizing that body language. Bertholdt hears him give a light laugh.

“You're a strange guy, sometimes, Bertl. But I like you for it.”, Reiner says gently, and it earns a shocked look from Bertholdt. Bertholdt stares at him, stunned, and then he huffs, before sticking his tongue out at him. Reiner laughs, sitting back in his seat, and takes a drink of his latte as he watches Bertholdt with amusement in his eyes. Bertholdt's face is on fire as he spins his straw around in his frappuccino. Reiner was still a dumbass, but Bertholdt liked him for that.

They're quiet for a few minutes, just enjoying the peace they had come upon. Reiner was gazing out the wide glass wall of the store, watching the rain patter onto the stone pathways and plants. Bertholdt would be looking to, but he's too busy gazing at Reiner instead. When Reiner's gentle honey colored eyes avert to him, Bertholdt jumps and drops his gaze to his frap instead. 

“Oh, also, Ymir's party is on Friday. Well. I guess it doesn't matter if you still insist on missing it. I don't mind if you want to.”, Reiner says then, and Bertholdt looks up at him from behind his bangs. Reiner smiles a teeth-revealing grin, for some reason, and it makes Bertholdt hurriedly drop his gaze again. “If things get out of hand, I can protect ya from the drunks.”, Reiner claims, and Bertholdt shakes his head.

“You'd be one of the drunks”, Bertholdt retorts, flicking his eyes up to him. Reiner makes an 'ah' sound and nods. “I guess you're going to have to protect yourself from me, then.”, he muses, and then chuckles. Bertholdt takes that too literally, and damn it, his face is on fire _again_. Reiner doesn't say anything further and they fall into a comfortable silence once more. Bertholdt knows he should leave soon, so he can make it to his next class, but maybe just a little longer he could stay with his friend. He smiles to himself as he takes a sip of his sweet drink.


	6. Chapter 6

How Bertholdt convinced himself to go to the party with Reiner, was thinking that meeting Christa will lessen his contempt for the girl he doesn't even know. And maybe it will strengthen his friendship with Reiner. He still felt like they were more roommates, than simply friends. 

Reiner had driven them both to Ymir's house, which was across town by Sina, a girls only college. Bertholdt feared he wouldn't know anyone there besides Reiner, but even then, knowing Reiner will be there for him comforted that anxiety. Sometimes Bertholdt wondered if he had some sort of social anxiety, but he wouldn't want to just decide he did. He hated people that put such serious things on a low level, just so they have a label with whatever problem they had. 

Anyways, he was anxious, and that was the point. Approaching the double door entrance with its beautifully carved wood and painted glass windows intimidated him more. And the music playing past them also gave a helping hand to his dread. It was late at night, about ten, so quite a few people had already arrived. The driveway and road was lined with cars. Great.

When they enter (honestly, Bertholdt was expecting a guard at the door, asking for identification or something), there are people standing and sitting about, some with red cups in their grasps, others empty handed. To be honest, Bertholdt expected grinding bodies and overflowing amounts of booze and hard drugs being passed around. He was pleasantly surprised this wasn't the case. 

“Hey Sasha!”, Reiner calls almost as soon as they entered, and Bertholdt is mildly startled from the loud shout. He looks over to see a girl with a red cup come bounding over with a pretty grin. She laughs randomly, and then says, “Connie's so drunk right now, and it's not even midnight.” Reiner chuckles, and looks over towards the couch that she came from. Bertholdt, having previously met him, could recognize his bald head among those of hair. He was upside down on the couch, with his legs over the back, and he was trying to blow pieces of popcorn from his nostrils. Bertholdt makes a face and Reiner laughs aloud.

“You seem pretty drunk yourself”, Reiner comments and she makes a silly face at him. He pinches her cheek and she smacks his hand away lightly, and they're both laughing again. Bertholdt finds it extremely weird/uncomfortable, so he tugs on Reiner's sleeve to his leather jacket. That earns Reiner's golden eyes and a quirked brow. “Yeah?”, he says, looking up at him. Bertholdt glances at Sasha, noticing that she's looking back at Connie.

“Uh, can we not stand in the entrance, please”, he mumbles, and Reiner nods. He says a goodbye to Sasha (who acknowledges it and returns to Connie and some other people at the couch), and then he begins towards the other direction, away from the group, and Bertholdt follows. They enter a kitchen that is rather...clean and shiny. It looks really modern and gaudy. But there are bottles of various types of alcohol on the island counter and Bertholdt sighs aloud. There are four other people standing around it. One of them was a girl with tied back brown hair and freckles on her face. She was looking at the label of a vodka bottle, and her eyes drift from it to both of them standing at the entrance of the kitchen.

She smirks when she sees Reiner. 

“Ymir, hey”, Reiner says, and then claps a hand over Bertholdt's back, making the boy jump, “This is Bertholdt, my roommate.” Ymir flicks her intimidating gaze to him, and sticks a hand out past the island counter, and Bertholdt pauses, before stepping up to shyly take the offered hand. This...was strange. 

“Hey, Bertholdt, I'm Ymir. The founder of this classy party you see around you.”

She has a mean shake, and Bertholdt massages his wrist when he pulls his arm back to himself. Jesus, she was really intimidating, first of all. Her eyes bored into him. And then she finally released him of her stare and looked over at Reiner. She set the vodka down and put a hand on her hip.

“You're not here to steal my girlfriend, are you? Do you want me to whoop your ass again, Braun? I'm sure your blood will go nicely with my margarita.”

Okay, now she was just scary.

Reiner merely laughs aloud, and Bertholdt looks at him like he's crazy too. It seems like Reiner doesn't know what to say, so instead he muses, “So, got anything for me?” Ymir rolls her eyes and then turns to pull open the fridge. She grabs a beer bottle from it and tosses it to Reiner.

“I think you should go easy if you're going to be in my house. Don't want your drunk ass crashing here.”, Ymir says, eyes glancing back and forth between Reiner and Bertholdt. Then she settles her gaze on Bertholdt, who breaks into a sweat under her stare. “Hey, Bertholdt, what do you like?”, she says as she gestures over the variety of alcohol. 

He shakes his head, “I don't drink.” She looks at him with a furrowed brow, “Then why did you come if you don't intend to get wasted?” Bertholdt shrugs, and looks down at Reiner who is twisting the cap to his beer off. “He dragged me here”, Bertholdt says, nudging his friend on the arm. There's sudden boisterous laughter emitting from the living room, and it makes Bertholdt jump. Reiner then retorts, “Hey, no, I said you didn't have to come, dude.” Bertholdt shrugs.

“Okay. Whatever, but if you change your mind, there's plenty to choose from.”, Ymir says, and then simply leaves them to pace out of the kitchen. Reiner begins after her and Bertholdt, being lost and confused, has no choice but to follow. This was really weird so far. 

“Why are we following her”, Bertholdt whispers when they're lagging a few feet behind her, and Reiner shushes him. Despite that, he answers, “Wherever she's going, Christa will be there.” Bertholdt frowns but continues to follow Reiner anyways. 

Ymir turns into what seems to be a lounge room. There's a flat screen TV on the wall with a long leather couch across from it, a pinball machine, a pool table, and an air hockey table. There are groups of people crowded around the air hockey table and the pinball machine. Shouts and laughter fills the room, and Bertholdt feels a headache beginning. Maybe he should have asked for water. That would have seemed really lame though.

Reiner doesn't even hesitate, he just walks right in and approaches the couch. Bertholdt remains at the entrance, and watches as Ymir takes a heavy seat beside this girl on the leather couch, and curls an arm around her shoulders. The girl under her arm has shoulder-length blonde hair. Reiner had slipped around the other end of the couch and then says very loudly, over the commotion of the other people, “Christa! Hey!” The blonde girl instantly makes a noise of pleasant surprise and stands from the couch, abandoning Ymir. A glare spreads over Ymir's face. Bertholdt feels the same.

She gives Reiner a hug, and Bertholdt sees how Ymir's face darkens. Christa is laughing softly as she says something to Reiner, and Reiner is looking down at her with a flushed face and a really big, teeth-revealing grin. Bertholdt, left at the door, gazes at that face. Well, he really liked her then. Reiner honestly didn't care that Christa had a girlfriend. Bertholdt watches them exchange excited words, before Ymir calls, “Hey, are we going to watch this fucking movie or what? Or should I leave so you lovebirds can get to the mackin'?” Bertholdt watches as Christa flusters and instantly returns to her girlfriend with an apologetic expression. Reiner doesn't look amused.

Having had enough with the scene, Bertholdt turns and leaves. He passes other people through the hallway as he returns to the kitchen. There isn't anyone else in the kitchen now, so he takes the opportunity to approach the fridge. He opens it and finds it full of brightly colored foods. Luckily, Ymir has bottled water. He grabs one and shuts the fridge. He sighs gratefully after taking a drink of the cool water. Standing in the kitchen, leaning against a counter, Bertholdt drinks his water as he listens to Sasha scream something about using Connie's head as a bowling ball (due to its baldness), and Connie calls her crazy. 

Its kind of amusing, but mostly, Bertholdt is bored and disappointed. He didn't expect to be abandoned by Reiner. Well, maybe he should have, because Reiner seemed really excited over seeing Christa again.

Pulling out his phone, Bertholdt decides to text Annie. He knows that Reiner won't leave Christa's side for a while. When he opens the contact, he types out a message after placing his water bottle on the counter beside him, “ _Reiner took me to a party and then left me alone. A water bottle is my only company right now. I'd say we're clicking. Come pick me up?_ ” He gets a reply instantly.

“ _Did you get the water bottle's number? and reiner's a dick, I thought that was understood. anyways, yeah, give me the address and I'll be there eventually._ ”

Bertholdt feels ten times better now, and smiles widely. Annie was great. He has to grab Water Bottle before hurrying out of the house to read the address at the front of the driveway. Then he texts the address to her, and she sends him a confirmation text. He sits on the grass outside, and looks at the stars before he sees Annie's Volvo pull up. Without considering to say a goodbye to Reiner, he approaches the car with a smile and gets in.

“Thanks, Annie.”, Bertholdt says, and buckles his seat belt. She nods and pulls away from the property. They're silent for a long moment, the music of Annie's CD filling the car. When she stops at a light on the main road, she looks at him and he looks at her.

“Why did you go with Reiner to a party?”, she simply asks after a moment of staring, and looks back at the road when the light turns green. The car jerks forward as Bertholdt says, “I thought it would be a way to hang out with him. Guess I was wrong.” She laughs wryly, “And why did he leave you?”

“He was with a girl that he's into.”

Annie looks at Bertholdt again, and Bertholdt keeps his gaze ahead. She tsks, and then says with annoyance in her tone, “What a dick. Why do you even bother with him? I barely tolerate him myself, and I've known him for years.” Bertholdt is quiet a moment, and props his arm on the arm rest of the seat, before resting his head in his hand.

“I think he's really nice, Annie. I like him. Its just bad timing.”

She shrugs, but doesn't say anything. But she does ask, a minute later, “Yours or mine?” It takes a long moment for Bertholdt to decide, weighing his options. 

“Yours. You could drop me off in the morning, right?”

“Oh, was it really that bad?”

Bertholdt blushes a little bit and brings a hand up to bite at his index finger. He obsessively nibbles until Annie notices. “Bertholdt, stop that.”, she demands, and he instantly yanks his hand away, processing what he was doing. He mumbles an apology.

“Jesus, Bertholdt, don't let him get to you like that. Reiner doesn't know any better. It's okay.”, Annie says, casting glances at him and his flushed, frustrated expression. He nods and looks away, out his window, so Annie can't see his face. Annie sighs quietly. Then they're silent until they reach her apartment on the other side of town. 

As she unbuckles her seat belt and turns off the car, Annie says gently, “You can stay the night. I think I have a spare toothbrush somewhere.” Bertholdt nods, and turns his head to look at her, and gives her a weak smile. He really appreciates it. Annie looks at his smile, and she can tell he does. She nods and then steps out of the car. Bertholdt follows suit. 

 

In Annie's apartment, Bertholdt feels more relaxed. He collapses on her couch and sinks back into the blanket and cushion, and she smiles over at him from the kitchen as she sets her keys on the counter. She approaches the fridge and calls, “You feel like replacing your water bottle friend?” Bertholdt laughs to himself and says, “Yeah. Hot cocoa sounds nice.” She begins to prepare it for him and Bertholdt thanks her from the living room. From the little open section in the wall, between the counter and the cabinets, Bertholdt can see Annie move about. She's wearing her white hoodie as usual. 

By the time she returned, he had moved over to her TV cabinet and looked through her movies to choose one to watch. When she crouches beside him and the pile of movies, she merely grabs Doctor Who off the shelf. He groans, “Why do we always have to watch Doctor Who?”

“I dunno, it's just really entertaining.”

“Can't we watch a movie this time?”

“Yeah, but we have to agree upon something.”

Thankfully, she sets Doctor Who aside and they proceed to make piles of 'most likely', 'probably', and 'definitely not' with the movies. They come to an agreement from the pile of 'most likely'. They decided upon _The Fifth Element_. They've watched it together before, and it was one that Bertholdt had somewhat enjoyed. Annie was alright with that choice.

So after starting it, and Annie had grabbed their hot cocoa and prepared a quick bag of popcorn, they gather on the couch with blankets that Bertholdt had grabbed. Bertholdt decides this is a much better outcome than that stupid party. He's glad he has Annie.

\----------

Bertholdt had slept out on the couch with the multiple blankets, and was awoken by his phone's alarm clock, that was set an hour and a half before he had to get to class. His leg was draped over the back of the couch and his arm was falling off the arm rest above his head. His other arm was pinned under his back, and he couldn't feel it. Sighing, he unraveled himself tiredly and made to turn off the alarm. With a groan he rubbed his eyes and forced himself to stand from the warmth of the blankets. A moment later, Bertholdt hears footsteps when he's running a hand through his messy black hair. He raises his gaze to see Annie walk out, completely dressed with her hair up and made already. She must have gotten up earlier. It was almost nine anyways.

“Morning. I'm sure you'd appreciate some eggs and toast rather than Poptarts, yeah?”, Annie speaks over her shoulder as she paces into the kitchen with bare feet and yoga pants dragging on the tile. Bertholdt yawns and stretches his arms high above his head as he nods. “Yeah, sounds good. Mind if I use your shower?”, he says groggily. “Go ahead. I found the spare toothbrush. Its on the sink. Although, you would probably want to brush your teeth _after_ eating.”, Annie calls from the kitchen as she sets a pan on the stove and pulls out the bread from the cabinet. Bertholdt thanks her and begins down her small hallway to find the bathroom.

Her shower curtain is of dolphins. So is her mat and the soap dispenser on the sink and the cover on her toilet seat. Bertholdt is used to her adoration of dolphins, but sometimes he doesn't like to be watched by multiple beady eyes of the animal. He begins to undress.

 

When he emerges from the bathroom with a tower over his head, dressed once more (typically, he wouldn't think of bringing a spare set of clothing to a party), he smells wonderful eggs and toast. And what smells like bacon. His mouth waters. Entering the living room, he peeks in through the opening in the wall and sees the table set, with Annie reaching over it to set something down. 

“Wow, smells really good”, Bertholdt says when he walks around the wall to approach the table. He takes a seat as Annie takes hers. There was a plate of sunny-side up eggs, toast, and bacon before him. With a small bowl of strawberries and grapes, too. He also had a glass of milk. 

“Its nothing, really”, Annie muses, and sits there, watching as Bertholdt breaks off a piece of his toast. Bertholdt realizes he's the only one eating once he finished one of the eggs. He looks up at her mid-chew and she smiles lightly. “I already ate.”, she says, and then stands, realizing that maybe Bertholdt didn't want to be watched. She approaches the dirty dishes in the sink and turns on the tap to begin washing them.

“Oh”, Bertholdt says, and then begins to eat again. He didn't have the luxury of time. He's quicker this time when he eats it all, and once he's done, he downs the rest of his milk and gathers his dishes. “Thank you, it was really good.”, Bertholdt says with a smile on his lips when he hands her his dishes. She nods, and begins to clean those as well.

“Let me know when you're ready, and we can go.”, Annie speaks, eyes downcast to her cleaning, and Bertholdt nods before he turns to leave the kitchen. He only has to brush his teeth and comb his hair, and then he's good. 

Once he's done with that (he hopes Annie doesn't mind that he used one of the brushes in the cabinet mirror), he pulls on his shoes and Annie grabs her keys. She must have put on her flip flops when he was getting ready. Her toenails were painted a light blue with small shiny crystal like stickers on them. 

“Why are you wearing those kinds of shoes in late fall?”, he muses when she unlocks the door and pulls it open. She was wearing her really thick black coat, with fur lining the hem of the hoodie. She hates the cold, so he did wonder.

“To show off my pedicure. Why else?”

Bertholdt laughs aloud at that, and she looks at him with a quirked brow. That was so strangely amusing, and Bertholdt wonders why that made him laugh. They hurry through the chilly morning air to get to her warm Volvo. 

 

By the time they arrive at Uni, he still has about twenty minutes. Bertholdt thanks her, and she nods and gives him a sweet goodbye wave after he had stepped out and the door was separating them. After that wave, she all but hurries the fuck out of there. Bertholdt smiles to himself. That was really nice. He liked being with Annie. She understood him so well.

Luckily, the entrance to Uni wasn't so far from where his dorm building was. He hurries to the entrance of the building. Once he's in, its slightly warmer, and he sighs with relief. His face was growing numb.

When he makes it to his dorm room, a feeling of dread had been building in his stomach. Would Reiner be upset at him for ditching the party? Probably not. He was probably grateful he didn't have to worry about Bertholdt. Bertholdt sighs, his good mood lessened, as he pulls out his keys and unlocks the door. At least he attempts to. It's already unlocked. 

He pushes it open and realizes the light is still on. Looking over, he sees Reiner sprawled out on his own bed, clothes and everything still on. Bertholdt rolls his eyes and shuts the door behind himself. He approaches Reiner's passed out body and nudges him. He's not even snoring. 

After shaking Reiner's shoulder harshly, it does nothing to help wake up the blond. Shit, what if he had alcohol poisoning? Did Bertholdt _really_ have to deal with this? Bertholdt will try waking him up one last time. After setting his keys on his bed, Bertholdt grabs a random cup from Reiner's desk. He spills whatever was inside it out into the sink of their small bathroom, and then rinses it out before filling it with water.

Returning to Reiner's unconscious form, he simply turns the cup over and proceeds to spill the water over Reiner's lax face. Reiner instantly bolts up and sputters, eyes wide open. Bertholdt sighs in relief. He sets the cup on Reiner's desk, and before Reiner can even ask, Bertholdt hurries out the door to jog to the showers down the hall. He returns with a towel.

Tossing the towel to Reiner, Bertholdt stands nearby and watches warily as Reiner groans and clutches his head. Then he snatches the towel and sluggishly rubs at his face and matted hair. “The hell, Bertl.”, he grumbles. Bertholdt merely says, “You weren't waking up, and I was worried you were dead.”

Reiner chuckles and then mutters 'ow'.

“Hungover?”

“Yeah.”

“How did you manage to get back?”

“Remember how Ymir said she didn't want me crashing at her house? Well, she dumped me off here.”, Reiner explains groggily as he wipes his eyes with his fingers. “At least, that's all I remember.”, Reiner sighs as he stands. Then he curses and grabs his forehead again.

Bertholdt grabs the cup from his desk once more, fills it with water from the sink, and returns to Reiner to hand the full cup to him, instead of pouring it over his head. Reiner mumbles a thanks before gulping it all down in one go. Bertholdt is momentarily distracted from his feelings with his concern for his friend.

“Fuck, I don't want to go to class today.”, Reiner says, and Bertholdt agrees silently. Then he takes the cup from Reiner's grasp, before filling it once more. After handing it to Reiner again, Reiner gives him a smile.

“Ymir was mad, too. Cause I kissed Christa.”

Bertholdt was shocked for a second, looking at Reiner's amused, flushed face, and then he frowned. “You should probably rest.”, Bertholdt mutters, and turns away. Reiner hums and then follows up by gulping down the second cup of water, before he collapses back onto his bed. Bertholdt grabs his bag from the floor, and glances at the clock on the wall. He had ten minutes. It was entirely acceptable to leave this time. He shoves out the room after turning off the light.


	7. Chapter 7

Following the week of the party, came the first midterm for Bertholdt. He took the opportunity to stay out of the dorm room as much as possible. Whenever he was there, all he really did was read, so studying gave him something to do. He had claimed one of the study rooms in the library. The library seemed more packed than usual. It was silent in his room, thankfully. With his books and notes spread out on the table, he focused on the notes that reviewed the book they had read for the first few weeks of the semester. 

The studying was simply just a recap of everything they had gone over. Bertholdt had remained in the room for a good thirty minutes or so before there was a quiet knock on the door to the room. Lifting his gaze, he sees Marco wave at him past the glass. Bertholdt nods and beckons to the door, and shortly Marco pushes it open and enters with a smile upon his lips. 

“Hi Bertholdt. Are you studying for the midterm?”, Marco says with a cheerful tone as he shuts the door behind him. Bertholdt nods. “Mind if I join you?”, Marco says as he steps up to the chair across from where Bertholdt was seated. Bertholdt indicates he doesn't mind with a shake of his head, and Marco then takes the seat with a brighter smile. He sets his books down and Bertholdt drops his gaze back to his notes again.

“You seem happy”, Bertholdt comments, green eyes fixed down at his notes. Marco actually laughs similar to a giggle, and it earns Bertholdt's gaze. He can tell Marco is blushing, and his dimples are discernible on his cheeks. Bertholdt can't help but smile lightly himself. Marco stares down at the cover to his book and his finger traces circles on the wood.

After a moment, Bertholdt realizes hes not intending to explain to Bertholdt, so he says, “Well, give me the details.” Marco's smile dies down. He raises his hand to rub it over the back of his neck as he says, “I took your advice and asked Jean if we could switch into a dorm together.” Bertholdt quirks a brow.

Marco laughs nervously and blushes deeper, “Jean did talk to the administrator and he's going to move into my room.” Bertholdt smiles before saying, “I'm glad. But what about Tomas?” Marco drops his hand and gives a light shrug, “He's okay with it. Uhm, I think he might just switch with Jean and move in with Connie.”

“I feel bad for him”, Bertholdt says and it makes Marco laugh again. Marco fidgets with his pen instead, and his smile remains on his lips. It kind of stretches the scars on that side of his face, but it makes Marco look kind of cute, the smile. Bertholdt looks back down to his notes and returns his attention back to studying. Marco is quiet from then on, only occasionally asking questions that Bertholdt has no problem answering.

\----------

“Yo, Reiner! Open up!”

Sitting at his desk, Reiner stares at his in-progress paper that remains open in a word document on his laptop. He had disabled his Internet so he could focus on a paper that was due soon. When he hears the pounding on his door and Eren's voice calling for him, Reiner decides to take a little break. He saves the document and then stands to approach the door. He unlocks it and draws it open to see Eren standing there. Eren steps past and Reiner lets him. He shuts the door behind and then turns to face Eren.

“So, Jean is switching out of Connie's room. I was wondering if you still wanted to room with Connie, cause Tomas is okay with taking your spot with Bertholdt. If not, Tomas will just bunk with Connie.”, Eren explains, getting right to the point of his visit. Really, he could have just texted or something, but Reiner was grateful for the distraction.

But he has to pause to consider that offer. Now that he thinks about it...he still needed to learn more about Bertholdt. He knows all he _wants_ to know about Connie. Connie wasn't full of surprises like Bertholdt was. And for some reason, now that he was reminded of his little challenge, he still felt that desire to discover more of his shy roommate. Its just that he's been distracted by another interest of his, and so he hadn't been able to address his challenge in a bit.

“Nah, I'm good. Thanks for letting me know though”, Reiner says, and pats Eren on the shoulder. Eren quirks a brow, “You want to stay with Bertholdt?” Reiner nods and sighs, “Yeah, Bertholdt is pretty cool. I like him as a roommate. He keeps my ass in line. Connie wouldn't.” Eren shrugs, and the walks past him, “Alright. Well, we're hanging in the lounge right now, so if you wanna chill, just come over.” Reiner smiles, “No thanks, I have some studying to do. Maybe later.” Eren frowns and then he nods.

“Good luck with that”, Eren says and Reiner thanks him. Then Eren leaves and Reiner shuts the door behind him. He sighs. Then he approaches his desk once more, and wonders where Bertholdt is. He hasn't been hanging in the room recently, like he typically does. Reiner thinks about what Bertholdt could be up to as he attempts to get back into his thought process for the paper. Maybe he could ask if Bertholdt wanted to grab a coffee or something.

\----------

“ _i'm bored. And I miss hanging around w/ u_ ”

It was a text Bertholdt had received when he was in Calculus. He was peeking at his phone from behind his arm that was resting on his desk, shielding view. His professor (she had white hair, bleached to hell, even though she seemed like she was only in her late twenties. She was really young for a professor) was talking with a tone that suggested that Calculus was actually enjoyable and fun. Bertholdt stared at his phone, and the text, unsure of what to reply with. This was out of the blue. Reiner had a break right now, if he wasn't mistaken, after having his general English class. 

“ _Don't you have your friends to entertain you, and to hang around with you? I'm in class, Reiner_ ”

Maybe that seemed really snotty. But whatever. Bertholdt still was upset at him over the party incident. Reiner could cry to other people about Christa anyways. He knows if he were to “hang around” with Reiner, it would only lead to a one-sided conversation about his little crush. Bertholdt hides his phone under his arms when he leans forward to rest his chin on his forearms upon his desk. His professor was cracking another one of her wry jokes about some Calculus formula, earning no laughter in return. Bertholdt is sudden sleepy. His sweater-clad arms were comfy.

His phone buzzes under his arms. He cares enough to withdraw it and open the text.

“ _I promised to get you in trouble earlier, so i'm not giving up. I meant, I miss hanging out w/ YOU, not just anybody. ur not retarded like my friends. they can get pretty annoying sometimes_ ”

Bertholdt rolls his eyes. He doesn't feel the urge to reply, but he may as well. 

“ _Trust me, I understand that. But right now, I can't really just leave the class just to hang out with you. Meet me at the deli at 2:30, then, after my class._ ”

The reply he receives is quick, and no doubt excited.

“ _cool, yeah, totally. See you there. also I didn't mean to snoop, but you have a lot of sweaters_ ”

Bertholdt laughs quietly and doesn't even reply. He'll let Reiner decide what his silence means. After putting his phone away, he attempts to pay attention to the lecture. But he hated math. It was hard not to fall asleep. He made it through the class though, with the thought of meeting Reiner later lingering in his mind.

 

The first thing he sees upon entering the deli, is the long shelf of various snacks. Then he gazes over at the counter, and behind it, a person preparing a sandwich. He steps in and unties his scarf, slipping it from his neck as he approaches the table in the corner where Reiner sat. Bertholdt smiles gently upon noticing there was a pretzel waiting for him across from the blond. Reiner looks up at him when he realizes somebody was standing beside the table. A grin spreads over his lips.

“I'm glad you came”, Reiner says in a greeting, and then motions to the pretzel and the seat across from him. Bertholdt blushes lightly and nods, pacing around to claim his seat, “Well, I did say I would come after all..” Reiner laughs lightly, “That you did. I was thinking you were mad at me, so I wasn't sure.” Bertholdt goes quiet at that, and tests the warmth of his pretzel with his cool fingertips. It was somewhat warm. Reiner must have arrived recently.. Or maybe he just ordered it recently. 

“You're not confirming that you _aren't_ mad at me, so I'm gonna ask. Are you mad at me, Bertl?”

Bertholdt sighs and sets his hands in his lap. He flicks his gaze up to Reiner's face. Of course, it was hopeful. Reiner's expressions were always expressive. Bertholdt shrugs, and then fiddles with his scarf in his lap, “Maybe a little bit...” Reiner frowns and asks, “Why?”

“Because you invited me to a party, saying how fun it would be, and then..left me alone just so you could woo your crush. Reiner, of course I would be upset over that. I didn't know anyone there besides Connie, and you should know he isn't the best company.”, Bertholdt says more than he intended to, realizes this, and grows silent, fidgeting with his scarf. Reiner sighs, “I'm sorry. I felt bad over that, really.”

Bertholdt doesn't really feel all that better about it, but at least Reiner did apologize. 

Then he begins to pick at his pretzel silently, taking small nibbles. “I guess this is your way of repaying for the latte I bought you earlier”, Bertholdt mumbles a long minute later. Reiner looks up at him, from his hands that were fidgeting on the table. Reiner smiles, “Yeah, guess so.”

“Did you eat?”

“Yeah.”

“How long have you been here?”, Bertholdt asks as he glances up at Reiner. Surprisingly, Reiner begins to flush in the cheeks a little bit, and gives a nonchalant shrug. “I dunno. A while, I guess.”, he says and flicks his honey colored eyes to Bertholdt's, “I didn't really have anything to do back at the room. I've been studying all day, so I thought I could just chill and wait for you here.”

Bertholdt nods and dips a piece of his pretzel into his cheese. It's quiet for a long moment, the sounds of the employee moving around in the back area filling the silence, until Reiner speaks once more.

“Hey, Bertholdt, have you had a girlfriend before?”

Raising his gaze to Reiner, Bertholdt cocks a brow. He shakes his head, and tries to make it seem like not a big deal by continuing to eat his pretzel. Reiner hums, and then pauses before saying in a quiet tone, “Boyfriend?”

At that, Bertholdt remains hesitant for a long moment. He even places his pretzel down to nibble at his fingertips, feeling his body break into a nervous sweat. It takes him a moment to realize he was biting at his fingers again out of habit, when he flicks his gaze up to Reiner and sees him staring at him with a furrowed brow. He drops his hand and wipes his fingers off on a napkin.

He nods, and Reiner gives an audible exhale. “Oh, cool. What made you break up with him?”, Reiner says with a voice that sounds somewhat breathless. Bertholdt flushes in the face and feels extremely uncomfortable.

“Why are you asking me this?”, Bertholdt grumbles, pressing his finger into his pretzel in a way to fidget out of nervousness. Reiner says instantly, hurriedly, “Uhm, sorry, I was just curious, is all. I was kind of wondering if you were dating Annie, or something. I guess that's not the case.” Bertholdt looks up at him and sees him with a concerned expression. Reiner was probably worried if he offended him.

“He broke up with me. Because he was fucking some other guy. I don't know the details, he just said that he lost interest in me.”, Bertholdt says bluntly, and sees shock spread over Reiner's face. He almost is amused by it, but its replaced with discomfort. He feels a tight, painful squeezing in his abdomen. He was strangely anxious, and it seized him up.

There was an unspoken question basically radiating from Reiner. Bertholdt sighs.

“Yes, Reiner, I've taken it up the ass before, sheesh.” It takes all his willpower to say that. Bertholdt feels himself grow hot with embarrassment in his clothing. Reiner blinks a few times and looks stunned. Then he laughs lightly, before saying with a trembled voice, “Well, then.”

“You better not ask me how it was.”

Reiner laughs aloud at that, and it almost breaks the discomfort. But Bertholdt still felt like this was really weird and...not wanted, in the least. But whatever. Reiner was an open-minded person, and Bertholdt was thankful for that. 

“When did you uh...realize?”

“When I was attracted to guys? When I was in middle school.”

“Oh. So you're not into girls in any way?”

Bertholdt thinks about that. He did find some girls really cute and attractive. He could picture himself kissing some girls, but that's about as far as it went. “I guess I'm sexually attracted to girls. I've never had a crush on one or anything like that.”, Bertholdt muses, giving a shrug, and then takes a shaky bite of his pretzel, his hand trembling slightly. Reiner is quiet for a moment.

“So, what about you then? When did you last have a girlfriend? Or was it that girl from middle school that called you Rei Rei?”

Reiner laughs quietly at that and then sits back in his seat, crossing his arms. He has to actually think about it. Bertholdt gives a little smile and waits for an answer. “I think the last time I had a girlfriend was back in high school. I've actually been interested in Christa...um. For a while. The last girl I was dating was in my junior year, before my interest in Christa began.” Bertholdt nods silently.

Reiner doesn't even hesitate to ask, “So, when was the last time you got some dick?” Bertholdt's eyes widen at that and then he actually laughs out loud, shaking his head at that ridiculous question. His laughter leads to a big stupid grin spreading over Reiner's lips. 

“Haha, actually, it was after breaking up with my last boyfriend. I hooked up with a guy, that was a bit older than me, and it was just a one night stand. That's all, really. It was about uhm. Eight months ago.”, Bertholdt says as he recalls that time. He had randomly decided to go to a gay bar. He wasn't even old enough to drink, and he thought he may as well check out the scene. It was pretty similar to a normal bar though. There weren't any men with flamboyant clothing or anything like that. There were even some groups of people at tables, a mixture of both men and women, just chilling in a gay bar.

The man sat at the table beside Bertholdt's. He just happened to be hot, and just happened to be interested in Bertholdt as well. Bertholdt wondered why a guy like him would be intrigued by a kid like himself, that was drinking water at a bar. 

“Tell me about him, c'mon, don't leave me hanging.”, Reiner jokes and then laughs lightly, watching Bertholdt's thoughtful expression. Bertholdt recalls his face easily. “He had really nice hair. It was blond, and he combed it across his forehead. It was more shaved at his neck, though, and longer at the top. Not like a bowl cut though, thank god. Anyways, he was pretty lean. I think he said he was thirty-something. But he was really attractive for that age. He had really pretty blue eyes. Um. And he knew how to use his hips.”, Bertholdt describes him, and admittedly, feels his palms grow sweaty and heart race just at the thought of him. Bertholdt had been so lucky to have earned the eyes of a man like him.

“I don't remember his name, though”, Bertholdt adds as an after thought. He should have gotten his number. Bertholdt laughs nervously and shyly looks up at Reiner through his bangs. Reiner looks impressed and it makes Bertholdt smile in amusement. “Damn, you know how to score.”, Reiner muses, clapping his hand over the table, making the salt shakers rattle. Bertholdt's smile extends. 

“What about you?”, Bertholdt asks quietly. Reiner smirks, “I have never been with a guy before.” Bertholdt rolls his eyes, “I meant with a girl, stupid.” Reiner chuckles and then he nods, “Okay, okay. Well.. Um.” He stops suddenly, and Bertholdt quirks a brow. He gestures for him to continue.

“I...kind of hadn't done anything in that area beyond being blown and like. Fingering. And stuff.”, Reiner says and then laughs lightly, dropping his gaze from Bertholdt. That is really shocking, actually. It makes Bertholdt raise his brow, and Reiner laughs nervously again. Bertholdt expected him to have a _list_ of girls he's tainted, but that's not the case. He juts his bottom lip out in a 'well shit' way.

“That...was not what I expected.”, Bertholdt admits as he looks over at Reiner's embarrassed expression. Reiner shrugs, “It's not like its a big deal. I just haven't even considered going that far with any of my previous girlfriends. That sounds really lame coming from a college student, huh?” Bertholdt shakes his head and leans forward a little bit, “No, no, that's totally fine. Its not like its a requirement. I think its kind of...awesome. I respect you a little bit more for that, if you can believe it.”

Reiner reaches across to smack him on the arm for that and Bertholdt can't help but chuckle a little. Reiner smiles though, and says, “Thanks for not being a dick and calling me a virgin.” Bertholdt laughs again and Reiner joins him along in his laughter with little chuckles. 

Thankfully, that uncomfortable and strange conversation had eased up a bit. Now Bertholdt only felt more comfortable around him. He's glad they agreed to meet here.

“You wanna grab a coffee with me, Bertl?”, Reiner asks after things had grown quiet again. Bertholdt nods with a smile, and they both stand. Bertholdt throws his empty plate and small cup of cheese away, before he grabs his scarf from the table and secures it around his neck as they step out into the chilly air. It feels really nice being with Reiner. Reiner was really enjoyable to be around. Bertholdt can understand why he has many friends.

Suddenly, as they are walking down the stone pathway in silence towards the Starbucks a ways away from the deli, Bertholdt feels compelled to curl his hand around Reiner's. His fingers were cold, and he had thought that Reiner's hand would be warm. Bertholdt considered if it was acceptable enough to not be weird, in a friendship gesture or something. Bertholdt grimaces at the thought of him actually doing that out of the blue, and brushes the internal debate away. Sighing aloud, Bertholdt does think that he is rather affectionate when he does become comfortable enough with someone.

This awakens deeper thoughts from him though, as they are approaching Starbucks. He had never felt that at ease to consider touching Annie before. Like just cuddling while watching something together or putting an arm around her. Annie just didn't seem like that kind of person who exchanged touches so easily. 

Whereas, Reiner seemed like a really open-minded, touchy guy. A guy that would be really nice to hug. He's probably really warm. Bertholdt wonders what its like cuddling with him. At that thought, Bertholdt blushes, just as they enter Starbucks. Reiner is still strangely quiet. Bertholdt's all warm now, in his clothing, and he's flustered, and Reiner is thoughtfully silent, but still, Bertholdt is glad he's with him.


	8. Chapter 8

Taking the midterm was a big weight off of Bertholdt's shoulders. He spent hours in the library going over the material with Marco. He had been so wound up about it, but during the midterm, it went pretty well. He had stayed up later than usual the previous night solely for the reason of desperately reviewing any material he failed to go over. And he was rather exhausted from that, and the stress he had unnecessarily put on his mind. When he returns to the dorm room after the class is over, he finds Reiner missing. Its not entirely new. He collapses onto his bed and stares up at the ceiling, his hands by his head. 

His blankets are really plush and soft under him, and the room is warm in general. Its so nice. And the sunlight is filtering in through the closed drapes, casting a dim light within the room. It soothes Bertholdt into a light nap. That was his last class of the day anyways. He doesn't feel concern as he realizes he's falling under sleep.

 

Seeing as it was a light sleep, Bertholdt was woken up by a simple sensation against him. It feels like a touch. His eyes groggily slide open. The bright light startles him and he clenches his eyes shut. He feels his leg being moved. The hell? Opening his eyes, he slowly props onto his elbow and sees Reiner moving his leg back onto his bed. Oh.

“Reiner?”, he speaks with confusion. 

The hand around his ankle releases and Reiner looks at him. “Your position was fucked up. It was bothering me. It looked really painful.”, he explains and Bertholdt stares up at him. Reiner's expression was soft as he looks down at his roommate. Bertholdt shakes his head as he raises a hand to rub at his eye. 

“I don't know if this is weird to say, but you look really peaceful when you're asleep. Well. As peaceful as you could get with your body in a weird ass position.”, Reiner says quietly. Bertholdt raises his eyes to him again, and pauses. “That is kind of weird, but um, its okay.”, Bertholdt says in reply, and it makes Reiner smirk lightly, looking down at him. Bertholdt blinks in surprise. Woah. That was kind of..

He doesn't even finish that train of thought. He sits up and runs his hands through his hair. 

“What time is it?”, he asks as Reiner walks away to sit at his own bed. Reiner withdraws his phone and looks at the time. “Almost eight.”, he says, and then begins to supposedly text someone. Bertholdt nods. Well. At least it was the weekend. Even if he messed up his schedule with that nap, he could fix it tomorrow.

For some reason, he feels like going out. He doesn't want to be cooped up in this room.

“Hey Reiner?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you want to like, I don't know. Go do something with me or whatever.”

Reiner doesn't reply for a long moment, so Bertholdt looks over at him. He's pre-occupied with his phone. After a moment, Reiner glances up at him with his golden eyes. Bertholdt looks back at him until Reiner drops his gaze to his phone once he receives a text.

“Sure.”

Bertholdt stands from his bed and sighs as he smooths out his sweater. Maybe they could just go on a walk or something. Anything was fine than just sitting around. Bertholdt grabs his coat that was draped over the back of his desk chair, and pulls it on as he looks over at Reiner. Reiner was still preoccupied with his texting. Bertholdt drops his gaze as he crouches down to grab his shoes.

Once he's ready, he stands by the door.

“Well?”, Bertholdt says, waiting for Reiner to follow him. Reiner stands automatically and walks in his direction as he stares down at his phone. His brow was furrowed. He ends up running into the corner of Bertholdt's bed. With a roll of his eyes, Bertholdt turns and opens the door, before he paces out. Reiner follows behind as he curses softly.

The hallways to the dorm building was colder than their room. Bertholdt should have grabbed his scarf. Well, whatever. He was locking the door behind them already. “Reiner, can't you put that away for now?”, Bertholdt asks lightly as they begin down the hallway. Reiner's thumbs swipe over his phone's screen endlessly, and its starting to bother Bertholdt.

“Uh. Yeah. Let me send a last text.”

When they reach the staircase, Reiner finally puts his phone away. “Sorry”, he says as they descend the stairs, their loud footsteps filling the silence, and Bertholdt doesn't say anything in return. Eventually, they make it down the three flights of stairs and break out into the cool air of outside. Its actually drizzling a little bit. It doesn't bother Bertholdt. He paces out, and looks up at the sky. The stars aren't as discernible tonight, it seems. There must be heavy clouds.

Reiner had stopped to stand beside his roommate when the taller boy paused to gaze at the sky, and then ends up following him again when Bertholdt starts down a pathway. Their breaths are slightly visible. Bertholdt listens to the tapping of their footsteps on the stone below them, and the crickets chirping. There was some conversation that could be heard, but it was very distant. Bertholdt wonders why its so quiet and peaceful tonight. Even Reiner is silent. 

They walk side by side as they pass rows of brightly colored trees and occasional bushes that had been planted on the grassy areas by the pathways. Bertholdt holds his hands behind his back and watches the stars as they pace farther and farther from their dorm building.

“Are we going anywhere in particular?”

Bertholdt looks over at Reiner, who doesn't look as interested in the nature as Bertholdt was. Bertholdt shrugs, “I thought it would be nice to leave the room. If you want, we could go get some coffee. Or go to the Wood center?” The Wood center was a place that was more for the community of the area around Uni. It held various productions and events both involved with the college, and with the community. It also had some other things like a bowling alley, a pizza place, and an arcade. Sometimes Bertholdt went there just to kill time.

It was within walking distance, seeing as it was on Uni's campus. 

Reiner hummed, “I think the walk is fine in itself.” They fall quiet again. The only difference is that Bertholdt is smiling softly now. They circle around the large loop in the pathway, and then they begin down the other side of the stone walkway, back in the direction of the dormitories. Although, after a minute, the pattering of the rain drowns out the chirping of the crickets and their footsteps. 

Following the increase of volume of the rain hitting the Earth, the sheets of falling rain become heavier and more frequent. Soon they're both soaked. Reiner curses loudly, above the loud hitting of the rain, and Bertholdt is grinning now. He doesn't mind that they're dripping with rain and his clothes are sticking to his skin with the wetness. Rain is nice. And its even more enjoyable when Reiner is flailing around with frustrated curses coming from him.

“You must dislike rain”, Bertholdt muses loudly over the rain, and Reiner makes an annoyed noise of confirmation. They jog back to the shelter of the lobby to the dorm building. Reiner is panting and Bertholdt is still smiling brightly. When Reiner raises his frustrated golden eyes to him, he stares at Bertholdt's happy expression, and then Bertholdt drops the smile on his lips.

“And you must like it”, Reiner says, expression softening a little bit before he attends to wringing his clothes out. Bertholdt nods despite Reiner's downcast eyes, and lets his clothes soak the floor of the lobby. He stands there nonchalantly, absolutely soaking wet, as he watches Reiner attempt to squeeze out water.

“Someone will get mad if they catch us”, Bertholdt says quietly, earning a nod from Reiner. With a trail of drops of water following each of them, they trudge up the staircase with a series of sniffs coming from Reiner. When in the hallway, Reiner begins to hurry to their door at the end, no doubt trying to avoid any confrontation from anyone he may know. When he makes it to the door before Bertholdt, he tries the knob and realizes its locked.

Bertholdt nearly laughs when Reiner casts him a desperate look from across the hallway. Bertholdt hurries to catch up, and once he reaches him and the door, Reiner sighs. He is quick to unlock the door, and as soon as he does, Reiner shoves into the room and begins to peel off his coat and shirt. Bertholdt shuts the door behind them just as Reiner's shirt lands with a wet smack on the floor. 

“Hey, hey, put it in the hamper. Don't get the floor wet.”

Reiner looks at him over his broad shoulder, rolls his eyes, and then briefly reaches down to snatch the wet article of clothing. He tosses it into the hamper along with his coat, before he begins to work on his jeans. Bertholdt leaves the room to grab some towels. 

When he returns, he finds Reiner only in his wet briefs, crouched by his dresser to find a pair of sweatpants. And probably another pair of underwear. Bertholdt throws a towel at him. Reiner takes it, thanks Bertholdt, and then withdraws clothing from his dresser before he escapes into the bathroom. Bertholdt looks at the water all over the hardwood floor. If he were to dry it before changing, he'd just wet it again.

So he begins to undress as Reiner does his thing in the bathroom.

It was actually really cold. Walking through the hallway (which lacked any heating) in soaked clothing chilled him to the bone. Standing half-naked in the room didn't make him feel any warmer. He was quick to rub the towel over his tan arms and the goose bumps running along the flesh. With a sigh, Bertholdt rubs the towel over his hair after wiping his torso off. Then he picks one of his more casual sweaters, one he wouldn't want to be seen in in public, before pulling it on. It feels much nicer than a wet shirt.

Reiner, thankfully, had taken a long time in their tiny bathroom, so Bertholdt was able to change into a dry pair of boxers and his navy blue pyjama pants. With the extra towel, he quickly wipes away the water on the floor. He didn't bother to walk back out to the shower room just to set the towels into the hamper there, where he really should deposit them. Instead, he just tosses them into theirs. As he takes a seat on his bed, the door to the bathroom opens, and Reiner walks back into the room with heavy footsteps on the floor.

“I should never let you drag me out of here again.”, Reiner says gruffly as he approaches the laundry hamper to dump his towel and soaked underwear within it. Bertholdt doesn't reply. He runs his hands through his damp black hair, attempting to smooth out the ruffled locks.

They're quiet for a few minutes. Reiner had curled up in his two thick blankets, attempting to conserve heat. Bertholdt was leaning against the wall beside his bed, with his blanket draped over him, watching with mild amusement as Reiner shivered like a leaf on his bed. He was sniffing a lot.

After about five minutes, Reiner says with a shaky voice, “Bertholdt come over here, seriously. I'm fuckin' cold.” His voice was muffled due to the fact he was hiding under his blankets. A pause of hesitation comes from Bertholdt, before he sighs and brushes his blanket aside to stand. Well, he was really cold himself anyways.

Crouching beside Reiner at the side of his bed, Bertholdt looks at the top of his head sticking out from the mound of blankets. His short blond hair was really messy, despite its closely cut length. Reiner's eyes appear suddenly, when he pulls his blankets back a little. He stares into Bertholdt's green eyes.

“What are you doing? Get up here and make me warm.”

Bertholdt looks for any sign of joking in his eyes. There isn't. Sadly, he is very serious. Bertholdt sighs and shakes his head as he stands. “I can't get on if you're taking up all the space.”, Bertholdt grumbles, and instantly Reiner scoots over until he's pressed against the wall. Bertholdt climbs on and slips under his blankets. Reiner's arms grab onto him and Bertholdt jumps, hands flying up under the covers. He smacks something.

“ _Ow._ ”, is spoken loudly by his side, and Bertholdt's voice is too lost for him to apologize. Reiner had scooted back under the covers, no longer visible. Bertholdt was still staring at the ceiling as he feels Reiner pull him close, and Bertholdt supposes that Reiner is holding him now. His arms are wrapped around Bertholdt's midsection, a leg drawn over Bertholdt's slightly. Bertholdt breaks into a nervous sweat.

After a moment, Bertholdt is sweating not just from nervousness. “Reiner how are you cold. You're really warm.”, Bertholdt says blankly, brow furrowing as he stares at the cracks of the ceiling above them. Reiner chuckles, and Bertholdt feels his chest move against his bicep. This was kind of weird. 

“You're the one that's warm, Bertl. I'm not cold anymore.”

Bertholdt blushes a little bit. He fidgets until Reiner tells him to stop. Then Bertholdt attempts to relax. He does, and finds that maybe this isn't so bad. His eyes remain open though. He cannot let himself grow too comfortable with this. Falling asleep in Reiner's arms would be really..something. Something that isn't good.

Although, Reiner seems carefree. Soon, he's snoring obnoxiously by Bertholdt's side. Bertholdt should have seen this coming. The hold around him isn't as secure though. Reiner's arm is lax, resting across his belly. After a moment of consideration, Bertholdt lifts a hand from under the mass of blankets to draw up the covers a little bit. Reiner's sleeping face comes into view. 

His mouth was hanging open, and when he snored (really loudly), it extended. Bertholdt gives Reiner's relaxed face an unamused expression. Reiner's head was resting beside his shoulder. Now that there wasn't a blanket between him and Reiner, he could feel his warm breath brush over his neck. Bertholdt just casually pulls the blanket back over Reiner's face. He could suffocate and Bertholdt probably wouldn't care. Probably.

\----------

In the morning, Reiner awakens with a start. His eyes tiredly open to a bright light filtering in through the window. So after a heavy rain storm like that, it decides to be sunny? Reiner slowly props up on an elbow and rubs at his eye. His blankets were haphazard around him, but he liked it that way. Looking over, he sees Bertholdt back on his own bed. With a relatively normal sleeping position this time. His back was facing towards the room, his front towards the wall. Reiner stared at the back of his head, at the messy locks of his dark hair. 

As he recalls, its Saturday. So, with that thought in mind, Reiner collapses back onto his bed and pulls his blanket over his head, shielding the light. Maybe another hour or two wouldn't hurt.

 

“Reiner, hey. Reiner!”

The loud voice wakes him up. Opening his eyes for the second time, he looks up blearily to see Bertholdt leaning over him. Why was he so loud? Bertholdt leans away once he confirms Reiner is conscious.

“Your phone won't stop buzzing, and it's annoying me.”, Bertholdt explains quietly, gazing down at him with his olive green eyes (which, admittedly, Reiner thought were very nice). Reiner makes a confused noise and then groans when he stretches under his covers. It was really warm, and it felt nice. Then he feels vibrations on his hip. He fishes a hand under the covers as Bertholdt returns to his own bed to continue reading his book.

Once he locates his phone in the mess of the covers, he withdraws it and tiredly squints at the screen. There was like, twenty texts. From Christa. Okay then. He opens the texting conversation, and scrolls through them all, reading them with concentration. They were all desperate and rushed.

It was mostly Christa panicking about something. Something that had to do with Ymir. Why did she think Reiner would be the most suitable person to talk to about this? Well. Maybe she trusted him. That's good. He begins to reply sluggishly. He hears the pages to Bertholdt's book turn as he types it out.

Basically, judging by her texts, Ymir wanted to take a break with dating her. Christa worried it was permanent, that Ymir was just laying it lightly down for her, but Reiner doesn't think that's the case. It seems like, to him, that Ymir was testing Christa. To see if she truly wanted to be with Ymir. Ymir was probably fed up with Reiner flirting with her girlfriend. Reiner couldn't feel guilty. He never really liked Ymir from the beginning. And plus, he probably had a crush (or whatever. Is it considered love if it's been this long?) on Christa longer than the freckled brunette. He attempts to comfort Christa.

“Its nice out today.”, Bertholdt comments many minutes later, when Reiner is in the midst of texting with Christa. Reiner glances at him. Bertholdt was still focused on his book. 

“Yeah”, Reiner says. 

Throughout thirty minutes of him laying there texting, and Bertholdt reading, Reiner has noticed from the corner of his eye, that Bertholdt was occasionally checking the clock on the wall. He probably had plans. Reiner was about to ask about it, but then Bertholdt stands and begins to change from his sleeping clothes into a suitable outfit for the day. Reiner returns to his texting when Bertholdt undresses.

Once Bertholdt had finished getting ready for whatever he was getting ready for, he says to Reiner, “I'm going to the gymnasium. See you later.” That earns Reiner's attention. Reiner had been curious over the fact that Bertholdt was a gymnast. He wonders if Bertholdt was still stubborn when it came to showing his..talent to Reiner in person. Reiner isn't even sure how he would go about doing that, but still. Maybe Reiner had looked up men's gymnastics videos on Youtube, maybe he didn't.

Reiner notices that Bertholdt was bringing some sort of sports bag with him. 

“Okay, see you later.”, Reiner says, eyes fixed on his roommate as he leaves the room quietly. He locks the door behind him. Reiner diverts his attention back to Christa.


	9. Chapter 9

“Thank you for meeting me here, Reiner. Really, it means a lot to me.”

Returning from grabbing their drinks, Reiner sets Christa's vanilla latte before her, and takes a seat across from her. He gives her a smile, “No problem.” With his eyes on her, he wraps his cold fingers around his pumpkin spice latte. Her pretty blue eyes were downcast to her petite fingers, which were fidgeting on the table.

“I feel kind of bad for asking you to come out here, though...I didn't want you to waste your Saturday on me..”, Christa admits, tilting her head a little bit in thought, eyes flickering up to Reiner. Reiner shakes his head, and, being the flirty idiot he is, reaches across to place his hand over hers, “Hey, no, its totally alright. I'm actually glad you did.” Christa blushes in the cheeks and Reiner feels adoration swell in his chest. She lets his hand linger, out of kindness. Or maybe not out of kindness. 

He pulls his hand away and takes a drink of his latte. 

They had agreed through text, shortly after Bertholdt left, that they were to meet at a Starbucks that was half-way between their colleges, that were across town from each other. Reiner was actually really ecstatic about it. He was all but bouncing in the driver's seat in his car on the way there. 

“So, obviously, you want to talk about Ymir...”, he begins, urging her to begin what they came here for. She lights up with realization. She stumbles over her apology for wasting his time and he laughs lightly and tells her not to fret over it. 

“Um. Yes. Well, she was...upset over what happened at the party..”, Christa begins meekly, dropping her eyes from Reiner. 

“You mean how I kissed you?”

“Y-yes!”, she sputters, blushing deeply. Reiner isn't surprised Ymir would be pissed over that, and was kind of glad with how things turned out. But that doesn't change the fact that he doesn't want Christa to be sad. Christa's embarrassed face dies down to that of melancholy.

“I don't want her to think that...I don't want to be with her. Because she means a lot to me. That was just a...thing that happened because we were both intoxicated. I wish she would understand that, but she insists its more than just a drunken mistake.”, Christa says gently, raising her eyes to Reiner's, and then takes a little sip of her coffee. Reiner is a little disappointed Christa sees it that way, as a “drunken mistake”, but its understandable. It wouldn't be a good thing if she were to say it was purposeful, much less that she kissed back. Reiner wasn't totally pissed at the time, anyways. He could tell it was her and what he planned to do.

Maybe...that was taking advantage of her, but Reiner needed to make it apparent with how he felt. But it seemed like Christa was too oblivious to tell that he did that intentionally. She'll know eventually, Reiner supposes.

“Ymir will know the truth, eventually.”, Reiner assures her. Christa takes that the wrong way, but in the way that is advantageous for her relationship with Ymir. “You think so?”, Christa says with hope in her tone, propping her chin in her hand, eyes growing soft as they look at Reiner. Reiner smiles at her, and nods.

They're thoughtfully quiet for a moment, and they both drink from their warm coffees. 

“Hey, Reiner, what about you? I heard that you were with Sasha. Is that true?”, Christa asks, probably trying to make it seem like she wasn't trying to make the meet all about her. Reiner raises his brow at that. Did people honestly think that? Wouldn't they think she was with Connie? 

“As far as I'm aware, Sasha isn't into me, and I'm not interested in her.”, Reiner says, and Christa raises her head from her hand. She looks surprised. “Really? I thought you had been dating Sasha..!”, Christa says with honest disbelief in her tone. Reiner laughs lightly, and shakes his head. “Nope, we're just friends.”, he muses. Christa hums thoughtfully, and takes a careful drink of her coffee. Her brow is knitted together, eyes downcast in thought. Reiner thinks its cute. He smiles as he takes a drink of his PSL.

“I don't want to be separated from Ymir..”, Christa mumbles a moment later. Reiner can picture her making the “:(“ emoticon easily right now. He doesn't respond. He watches her and takes another drink of his coffee. Christa sighs and leans back into her seat. She was wearing a light pink sweater, with a light green and aqua colored scarf around her neck. It wasn't really a scarf though. It was really thin, and kind of see-through. It seems like its for the fashion, and not for the purpose of warmth. It looks good, nonetheless.

Reiner realizes his thoughts are drifting a little bit from the topic at hand, and raises his gaze back to Christa's frustrated expression. “Have you tried talking to her?”, he asks, earning Christa's bright blue eyes once more. She nods, crosses her slender arms, and says, “Yes, but she ignores my texts and doesn't answer my calls. I tried confronting her during the class we have together, but she just told me that she wasn't going to discuss it. She told me she just wants to think about it for a bit. I don't know what to do!”

“I think you should just let it sort itself out. She'll let you know when she wants to try again.”, Reiner says gently, and Christa looks distraught to his words. It doesn't look like she wants to wait. She must really care for Ymir, then. Reiner feels a little bit sad that Christa isn't as interested in him as she is with Ymir, but he doesn't let it bother him. 

“Okay, I guess.”, Christa says sadly, looking down at her lap. Reiner worries at his bottom lip. He doesn't know how to make her feel better. 

“I'm sure it'll turn out for the better.”, he tries to lamely comfort her. She accepts that though, and a soft smile spreads over her lips. She looks hopeful as she nods, “Yes, me too. I have faith in Ymir.” Reiner gives a strained smile in return. This isn't turning out how he had hoped, but that is typical. Christa begins to stand a moment later. Reiner watches her.

“Um, I should head back. I don't want to waste too much of your time. Thank you for the coffee, Reiner.”, she says softly, giving him a gentle smile. Reiner feels his face flush as he nods, and then he says a moment later, “No, it wasn't a waste of my time. I'll talk to you later, then, Christa.” She nods, smiles sweetly, and then leaves with her latte. The short heels to her boots click on the tile as she walks away. Reiner remains sitting there for a minute. He wonders if Christa will ever see how he feels about her. 

\----------

At the gymnasium, Bertholdt had successfully pulled off a technique he had been attempting for the past few weeks. It was a technique that was performed on the horizontal bar, where he held most of his skill, but even that technique had been hard. He always failed on the landing, but that day, he only stumbled a little bit on the mat, whereas typically, he fell on his ass like an amateur. Feeling fulfilled, Bertholdt had returned to the dormitories with a good mood. 

 

Upon entering their room, he set his bag down and exhaled deeply. He took a shower before leaving the gymnasium, so he wouldn't be sweaty and gross upon his return. His hair was still a little damp.

“How was it?”, was grumbled from the mass of blankets on Reiner's bed. Bertholdt quirks a brow as he approaches the bed. He sees the top of Reiner's head poking out. “Fine. Are..you okay?”, Bertholdt answers warily. Reiner huffs from under the blankets, “The girl I like doesn't even acknowledge the fact that I like her. Its probably so obvious.”

“It is kind of obvious, actually. I'm surprised she hadn't realized yet.”

“She's really oblivious sometimes.”

“Ah. Hey, while I'm in a good mood, we should enjoy the nice day the fall has to offer. It might be one of the last sunny days.”

Reiner looks out from his blankets of misery to give Bertholdt an unamused look. “I don't feel like enjoying a day when my love is denied.”, Reiner says, and then ducks back under the blankets. Bertholdt is quiet for a moment. Reiner was acting like a whiny kid. Wasn't he supposed to be an adult? He doesn't say this though. 

“How about I text Annie, and we could do something with her. Didn't you want all of us hanging out together anyways?”, Bertholdt quietly says, and Reiner huffs again. But he doesn't retort defensively again. Instead he mumbles a moment later, “Okay.”

So after taking a seat at his bed, Bertholdt withdraws his phone and composes a quick text to Annie.

“ _Reiner is moping around, and I feel like doing something. He agreed to the idea of us all doing something together. You busy?_ ”

As usual, Annie is quick with replying.

“ _I actually just got back from work, lucky for you. but who even said I wanted to see that block head._ ”

“ _Annie, c'mon. I'm bored and he's bored, and we still need to meet up, all three of us. We could do whatever you want to do_ ”, Bertholdt hurriedly texts back. Reiner asks grumpily from his mound of blankets, “What did she say?”

“She said she's thinking about it”, Bertholdt lies. Telling Reiner that she called him a block head wouldn't make him feel any better about leaving the room. Bertholdt's phone buzzes in his hand. Opening the text, he reads it.

“ _Fine. first, we get some mc d's. I am so craving a mcflurry right now. the things a period makes u want. And then we could like, see a movie or something. Idk. You guys can decide. Mc d's is mandatory._ ”

Bertholdt smiles a little, and replies with, “ _I think wanting a mcflurry is pretty mild, compared to the horrifying stories I've heard. And okay, thanks. I'll see what Reiner wants to do besides rot in the room_ ” 

“Annie says we have to go to McDonald's, and then...well, we can do whatever we decide upon.”, Bertholdt says aloud to Reiner. Reiner is silent. Bertholdt wonders if he fell asleep. But then he says in a muffled voice, “Sounds fine.”

“ _We'll decide after McDonald's. Meet you at the one by your apartment?_ ”, Bertholdt texts to Annie. 

“ _Yep_ ”, is all he gets in reply. With that, he stands, and walks over to where Reiner is laying. He nudges the lump of Reiner with his fingers, before saying, “Reiner, get up. We're meeting her there.” Reiner grumbles in annoyance, and an arm shoots out to smack his hand away. Bertholdt sighs, “Why would you even agree if you refuse to get up?”

Reiner suddenly throws his blankets off and leaps off the bed to stand before his roommate, and it nearly gives Bertholdt a heart attack.“I'm up”, Reiner says plainly, staring at Bertholdt's shocked expression with his hair messy and haphazard. Bertholdt glares when Reiner bursts into laughter after a long tense moment of silence, no doubt amused by Bertholdt's surprised face. Bertholdt feels compelled to smack him, but merely shakes his head and waves him off as he turns to approach the front door.

“You're really dumb sometimes, you know that?”, Bertholdt says as he grabs his coat and pulls it on. Reiner is still laughing as he changes into a shirt that isn't wrinkled. Bertholdt feels embarrassed as Reiner continues to chuckle while he puts his shoes on. He feels his cheeks grow warm with blood. Reiner was truly a dumbass. 

“Okay, okay, sorry. I'm done.”, Reiner says, and Bertholdt rolls his eyes as they leave the room, after turning off the light. 

\----------

At McDonald's parking lot, Bertholdt recognizes Annie's Volvo in the front row. When they're parked, he gets out of Reiner's truck and hurries to the front entrance. He hears Reiner call for him to wait up, but he ignores it and enters the fast food restaurant. He spots Annie sitting at a table in the corner, eyes drawn out the wide window to her side. When he approaches, she looks up at him. 

“Hey”, she greets, and then her blue eyes avert past him. “Hi, Annie”, Bertholdt says lightly and takes a seat across from her. He unzips his coat as Reiner approaches with loud footsteps on the linoleum. Conversation drifts through the restaurant as Annie calls, “Oh, look who it is! Looking the same as ever, I see.” She smirks when Reiner demands, “What's that supposed to mean, Annie? Jeez.” He takes the last seat at the table. Annie looks amused as she glances between Bertholdt and Reiner. 

“Who would have thought you two would have been paired together.”, Annie muses as she props her chin in her hand. Bertholdt raises his gaze from working on the stubborn zipper on his coat to her, brow furrowing and cheeks flushing. Reiner retorts instantly, “Actually, we weren't. I was tricked into it.” He was quick to prove Annie wrong, but he looks like he regret saying that. He glances at Bertholdt, who's green eyes are drawn to him now. He looks at him with a question plainly in his eyes.

“What do you mean, exactly, Reiner?”, Annie muses, dropping her hand from her chin to stare at him. Reiner's concerned expression wipes away and he gives a nonchalant shrug, “Well. My friend said that if I switched with him, I would be able to room with my other friend. But instead...um. I was actually switching into a room with Bertl, not my friend.” His tough demeanor lessens, and he looks more worried than when he first began to explain. He glances at Bertholdt.

Bertholdt's face had become blank throughout the explanation. Annie wasn't smirking anymore, instead, she was looking at Reiner with irritation in her eyes. Reiner rubs at his neck, “Uh, its not like its a bad thing, though.” Annie gives him an unamused look, and he shoots her a mild glare. She rolls her eyes and then looks at Bertholdt. Bertholdt realizes they're both staring at him. He looks back and forth between them.

“Why are you staring at me? Are we going to order or what?”, he sputters, flushing in the face. Even if he was a little upset about the fact Reiner didn't originally want him as a roommate, he didn't let it show on his face. It wasn't a big deal, anyways. Reiner said he was glad it turned out this way. Kinda. Annie nods, “Yeah, I'm dying for that McFlurry.”

Reiner stands and slams his hand on the little table, “I'm going to get like three large fries.” Annie stands with him, and they walk to the line together. Bertholdt hears Annie say, “Its coming out of your wallet, Reiner.” Reiner shrugs. Bertholdt quietly watches them from the table.

“Hey, Bertl, what do you want! I'll pay!”, Reiner calls loudly, and Bertholdt blushes in embarrassment. Bertholdt doesn't feel like yelling across the store, so he remains quiet. Thankfully, Reiner gets it and just strides back to the table. He leans over towards Bertholdt after approaching him, and demands lowly, “Well?” Bertholdt thinks that maybe he was a bit too excited, and leans away. Reiner's (pretty) honey colored eyes were fixed on him. 

“Uh. A ranch snack wrap is fine.”, Bertholdt mumbles, eyes falling away from Reiner's out of embarrassment. Reiner nods with a noise of confirmation, and then turns to return to Annie in line. Bertholdt lets out a shaky exhale. It seems like Reiner isn't down anymore. That's good. Bertholdt runs a hand over his face as he sighs. This was already tiring, and they still had the evening ahead of them.

 

When they had two trays full of food gathered on their tiny table, Bertholdt was deciding that maybe this was fun, too. Reiner was already munching on fries, and Annie was telling him not to choke. She was taking small spoonfuls of her McFlurry as she looks between her two friends. Bertholdt was smiling lightly to himself as he watches Reiner scarf it down. Eventually, he loses his eager steam towards devouring it all in one go, and leans back in his chair, looking at Annie and Bertholdt as he takes a drink of his Dr. Pepper.

“Hey, Bertl, what's your favorite soda?”, Reiner asks when he sets his drink down. Bertholdt is mildly startled by the attention diverted to him. Annie scoffs, and Reiner looks at her with a frown. Then he glances back to Bertholdt with a cocked brow. Bertholdt says after a pause, “I don't like soda.” Reiner simply says, “Oh. Then what is your favorite drink?”

“Hot chocolate.”, Bertholdt answers quietly, his eyes flicking to Annie. Annie notices, and gives him a little smile. Reiner noticed, but doesn't comment. He hums, “Well. I expected you to say caramel frappuccinos.”

Annie leans forward and says with a raised brow, a little teasing, “Oh, Bertholdt has a really bad sweet tooth, so that was actually very predictable.” Bertholdt flushes and gives her a look that suggests she shouldn't have said that. Reiner makes an 'oooh' sound, and then laughs. “That's so like you, Bertl.”, he says with obvious amusement in his voice. Bertholdt gives him a light glare, but it isn't very effective with the red color across his face. Annie laughs lightly as well. 

“What about you, Annie? You're the one with the ice cream, here.”, Reiner challenges, before taking a bite of his McRib. Annie scoffs once more and takes in a big spoonful of her McFlurry, before saying, “Its not me who wants it, Reiner. My body demanded it. Sometimes, it just decides to give me intense cravings. Its not like I _want_ to have it. I just have to satisfy the desire.” Reiner looks at her with a bewildered expression. Bertholdt giggles, and hides his smile with his hand. Reiner averts his confused expression to him.

“Did you even understand what she meant?”, he questions, gesturing to her amused expression with an open hand. Bertholdt drops his hand from his mouth, nods, and then giggles again with a mouthful of his snack wrap. After chewing and swallowing he says, “Knowing her for so long, she tends to talk more openly about her feminine problems.” Annie smirks as she spins her spoon around in her ice cream. She doesn't even deny it. Reiner throws his hands up and then follows up by eating more fries.

 

After that, they agreed to laze around at Annie's place, that was very nearby. Before they had left McDonald's, Annie was letting Reiner know of a time Bertholdt fell in a dumpster in their middle school years. When Annie had even uttered a single word that reminded Bertholdt of the time, Bertholdt simply ran off and escaped into Annie's messy Volvo. Luckily, she rarely locked it. 

Reiner was busting a gut laughing as he and Annie had walked out, and Annie looked straight at Bertholdt through the windshield of her car. Bertholdt gave her the _meanest_ , most _unamused_ glare he could muster, and it only made Reiner laugh harder. Bertholdt ended up sliding farther down in his seat to hide from Reiner. In the end, Bertholdt went to Annie's apartment with her in her Volvo, sitting on the floor in front of the passenger seat. Which was hard, because he was too big for such a small space. She had simply greeted him with an innocent, “Oh, hey, Bertholdt. Didn't expect to find you here.”

“You suck” is all Bertholdt said in return. She must have been smirking as she backed out of the parking lot. Reiner had followed behind them to her apartment complex. 

When inside her apartment, Reiner said, “Oh, its actually clean!” Annie flipped him off over her shoulder as she walked down the hallway to her bedroom. Reiner was chuckling to himself as he went into the kitchen to grab a drink from her fridge. Bertholdt claimed a spot on the floor in front of the couch. He leaned against the couch and stared at his bare feet on the carpet. Annie had a rule that you had to remove your shoes at the door.

“Hey, Bertl”, Reiner said, after he walked up to where Bertholdt sat, and stood there, before he chugged on his water. When Bertholdt looked up at him, Reiner stopped drinking and said, “Uh, thanks for dragging my ass out of the dorm. This has been cool, hanging with you two.”

“Don't get sappy, Reiner”, Annie calls from the hallway, and then she emerges in her typical yoga pants and her white hoodie. Reiner averts his golden eyes to Annie, standing next to Bertholdt still, and says, “If you consider that sappy, you really are apathetic.” She waves him off and enters the kitchen to begin preparing Bertholdt a cup of hot chocolate. 

“Yeah, its been nice.”, Bertholdt quietly says, so only Reiner would hear. Reiner looks down at him, and then smiles brightly. He then takes a seat beside Bertholdt on the carpet, grunting quietly as he did so. Bertholdt fidgets with his fingers as Reiner leans against the couch. Reiner was sitting a bit close, with their shoulders aligned, but Bertholdt doesn't speak up against it. It shouldn't be a big deal. They've...pretty much cuddled together already. 

Reiner gives a refreshed gasp after he finishes his water bottle. Annie returns after a few quiet minutes, to hand Bertholdt his steaming cup of hot chocolate. He quietly thanks her and she nods. 

“So. What do you guys wanna watch? Cause there really isn't much else to do.”

Reiner hums and then leaves Bertholdt's side (Bertholdt felt a little disappointed, which surprised him) to approach her shelf of movies. He looks through them. Bertholdt doesn't really mind. He just enjoys being here with them. He smiles lightly, feeling content. Annie had approached Reiner and the movies, and was arguing with him over what to choose. Bertholdt felt happy with where he was right now. He wonders if Reiner and Annie felt the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Okay I just really love writing B/R/A. I just want to point out, that Annie may seem OOC? I just think, like Bertholdt, she would be more herself, and open, around people she was comfortable with. I think she would be a really sarcastic, teasing person!


	10. Chapter 10

It all came upon Bertholdt suddenly. At first, Reiner was just Reiner. And then Reiner was his friend that happens to have a great smile. And pretty eyes. And a really nice body. His laugh could be really cute, too. Bertholdt hadn't felt an attraction like this since that one night stand at the gay bar. 

It honestly was out of nowhere, though. People just randomly develop crushes, or just think 'oh wow, he's actually kind of hot'. Bertholdt just suddenly thought Reiner was..really attractive. He thinks that his comfort with his roommate had led to this. Honestly, maybe it had to do with Reiner's acceptance of his sexuality, too. But as far as Bertholdt knew, Reiner was completely straight. And still madly into Christa. 

Well, its not like Bertholdt was in love with the guy. He had just come to realize that maybe he wouldn't mind kissing his face off. But hey, baby steps. 

Things were the same though. Bertholdt's realization didn't really change how he acted around Reiner. Or how Reiner acted around him, for that matter. Reiner was still enveloped with Christa and if he wasn't he was either focusing on his classes or meeting with his friends. Ever since the day that Reiner and Bertholdt hung out with Annie, Reiner was suddenly more focused on his classes than Bertholdt had seen before. 

That was good. Bertholdt wasn't complaining. 

 

It was a week after the meet at McDonald's (and two days after he realized his attraction to the blond) when Bertholdt noticed a change in Reiner, that was more than just his increased determination with his studies. When Bertholdt had been walking to the library from a class, it had started to pour rain again. Students had hurried to nearby shelter. Whereas, Bertholdt wasn't as concerned. He merely pulled the hood to his coat over his head, tightened his scarf around his neck, and quickened his footsteps. Although, his destination had switched to Starbucks. He had to get a warm drink now.

Luckily, he wasn't that far from it. He made it to the protection of the store within a few minutes. His hair was soaked, but his clothes were only damp. After shaking off any loose droplets of rain, he approached the line and ordered a hot chocolate. 

As soon as he had taken a seat at a table by the window, he withdrew his phone and texted Reiner.

“ _If you're available, would you like to come over to Starbucks? I'm already here. I could order your PSL beforehand if you want_ ”

He held onto his phone for a long five minutes. The hot chocolate he ordered was done by then, and was steaming atop the table he sat at. When he received a text in reply, he hurriedly opened it.

“ _no, sorry. Thanks tho_ ”

Well, that was a little surprising. Reiner never turned down coffee. He didn't even provide an explanation. Bertholdt felt that familiar tight and unpleasant feeling build in his stomach. He disregarded it, though, and set his phone aside to take a drink of his hot chocolate. It isn't as satisfying as he would have hoped. Its not as good as Annie's, but it still warmed him, and that was the point. He sighs. When he looks out the window, he gazes at the sheets of rain falling from the angry clouds above, forming small puddles on the pathways, and watering the plants and grass. 

Suddenly, Bertholdt felt so tired. He takes a few more drinks of his hot chocolate, before standing, and leaving the Starbucks with his hood over his head and a warm drink in his hands. 

 

Instead of going to the library like he had originally planned, he returns to the dorm room. Before he had left, Reiner had been gone. And when he had unlocked the door and pushed inside, he found it empty once more. Bertholdt stood at the entrance, curious to where Reiner would be. Maybe he was studying at the library. He did tend to become distracted with his laptop whenever he was inside the dorm room. It was too late in the day for him to have a class, too. Bertholdt takes off his coat and scarf, before he puts them back in their places. 

He glances at the clock. It was eight-thirty. He was tired enough, and it was late enough, for it to be considered acceptable to go to bed at this hour. Bertholdt tends to sleep in late if he doesn't go to bed at a very early hour, anyways. Bertholdt feels a heavy weight inside as he starts to remove his damp clothing. Once he dresses in his plaid pyjama pants and a plain grey t-shirt, he slips under his thick blankets and sighs gratefully. Curling into a ball with the blankets, he seeks warmth and slumber.

\----------

In the morning, Bertholdt finds Reiner sleeping peacefully, and loudly, in his bed. 

His snores drone out the noise of Bertholdt tiredly climbing out of his bed and from the mess of his blankets. Its a dark morning. There isn't any sunlight filtering in through the drapes today. The winter must be settling now, then. It has been pouring rain recently.

Bertholdt glances at the clock after stretching with a groan, and realizes that its later than he usually gets up. His first class starts later today, which is convenient. Reiner's loud, shaky snores earn Bertholdt's gaze. With soft footsteps on the hardwood floor, Bertholdt approaches the mound of Reiner atop his bed. The lump extends in mass whenever Reiner snores. He can't even find any part of Reiner. He's completely enveloped in the blankets.

Bertholdt turns to leave the room after grabbing his shampoo, brush, and body scrub from their little bathroom cabinet. A long, hot shower sounds good right now. 

 

Upon entering the changing room to the showers, Bertholdt notices a boy in the far corner of the room. He had two tones of hair color. The bottom was closely shaved and a darker color of brunette than the top. Bertholdt looks away and walks to the hidden part of the changing room, where there was a small wall separating the sides of the room. He claims a locker and begins to undress. 

With a towel secured around his waist, he silently paces out from the hidden area. Luckily, there isn't anyone else. The other boy must have left. Bertholdt, with his shampoo and scrub, hurries out the exit of the changing room, that leads to the shower stalls. He slips into the farthest stall and feels less nervous behind the locked door of his stall. He sets his things on the small built in shelf to the side, and then moves out of the way when he turns on the spray. It takes a few minutes for it to become warm.

Once its a considerable warmth, he slips under the spray and sighs. He had about two and a half hours before his first class of the day, so he wasn't concerned about time consumption. With his eyes closed, he feels his hair wet with the water that had been growing steadily warmer. When the water begins to burn slightly, he relaxes. He likes it that way. He stands under the biting hot water, until he decides its time to wash his hair.

With a small glob of his vanilla scented shampoo, he rubs it into his black hair and feels suds slide down over his tan shoulder blades and his back. As always, he was thorough with scrubbing his scalp. Once he was satisfied, he let it wash out. He grabs his scrub and mixes some of the soap from soap dispenser into it. Once suds form, he begins to cleanse his body this time.

The warm water was making him drowsy again. With a yawn, he finally finishes scrubbing his toned calves with slow movements. After sluggishly rinsing the soap out of the scrub, he puts it aside on the shelf. He stands under the never ending warmth happily. Even if it took a while for the warm water to come, it always lasted for a good twenty minutes. 

Sometimes, he liked to sit down and just relax under the comforting warmth of the water. He used to do it all the time when he was in high school, but he tried to quell the desire to, knowing it would waste water and increase the bill at the same time. He wasn't as concerned seeing as it was the college's money, though. He leaned against the tiled wall and closed his eyes. He let his thoughts drift, with his knees raised and arms around his shins, the stinging water traveling over his tanned skin.

Ten minutes later, the sound of someone entering and starting their own shower startled Bertholdt from his distant relaxation. Maybe he should get out now. It was just...so nice. But he didn't want to hog the warm water, and a stall after he was done showering. So, he stands, hesitates for a minute under the coaxing warmth, and then turns off the spray. He lets the water drip off of him for a moment, listening to the telltale sounds of another person taking a shower, and then grabs his things. He shakes the water off the scrub before he unlocks the stall, and steps out. Its chillier outside the stall, no longer being in a cloud of steam. He shivers as he grabs his towel off the rack by the stalls. Once he wraps it around his waist while balancing his things, he begins towards the changing room.

He doesn't like how cold the changing room is, so he hurries with toweling himself off. After he quickly changes back into his pyjamas (really, he should have brought a change of clothes. He wasn't thinking clearly due to his sleepiness), he grabs his brush and approaches the row of sinks and the large mirror. He looks at his tired face as he tames the locks of his dark hair with slow brushes. As usual, he styles his hair with the bangs parted in three ways. He always liked how it looked. 

When he returns to the dorm room with his things, he picks out a pair of jeans and his favorite sweater. He changes into the articles of clothing as Reiner snores loudly from his bed. Bertholdt puts his scrub and shampoo away in the bathroom's cabinet, before he brushes his teeth. Maybe he should go get breakfast at the deli. He isn't in much of a rush to get only Poptarts. He has about two hours now. 

But instead of leaving instantly, he takes a seat on his bed and leans against the wall. He misses the warmth of his shower already. Its kind of cold in the room. He brings his legs up and wraps his arms around his shins. Silently, he looks over at Reiner who is still snoring rather obnoxiously. Bertholdt had gotten used to it. 

Bertholdt remains there for only a few minutes. His hunger outweighs his sleepiness. After standing with a sigh, he sluggishly pulls on his coat and secures his scarf around his neck. Once he makes sure he has his wallet on him, he leaves the dorm quietly, and locks the door behind him. 

He's pretty sure it isn't cold enough for his hair to freeze. 

The walk to the deli isn't that far. Although, its chilly and raining again. Not so harshly though. Yet it wasn't a drizzle either. So, he hurries his walking. And once he makes it to the deli, he finds that its actually kind of full. There is a couple tables open, though. He gets in line and orders a vegetarian omelette as well as a hot chocolate.

Its actually kind of nice, sitting at a table beside the wall of the deli, enjoying a pretty good vegetable omelette and a not-so-bad-but-not-as-good-as-Annie's hot chocolate. He feels almost content. Almost.

 

With his hunger satisfied and body warm again with the hot chocolate, Bertholdt returns to the dorm room. He spent about thirty minutes at the deli. So he still had a lot of time to kill. When he makes it to their door after walking up three flights of stairs and down the cold hallway, he finds it unlocked. Reiner must be gone then. He opens the door and after turning on the light, its confirmed. All that's left of Reiner is his pile of blankets on his bed. Well, he probably had a class to go to anyways. His laptop was missing, so it was definite. It kind of sucked how he got up just as Bertholdt left.

Bertholdt takes off his scarf and coat after shutting the door quietly. Instantly, after taking off his shoes, he approaches Reiner's messy bed, and begins to straighten it out. Out of habit, he liked having things in order. He smoothed out the wrinkled sheet under the blankets, and then righted the pillows before straightening out the under blanket atop the mattress. Then he follows up with tucking the comforter over the under blanket. He spoiled Reiner too much, sometimes. It would've bothered Bertholdt though, just leaving it like that.

Once hes satisfied, he smiles lightly at the neatly made bed, and then returns to his own. He proceeds to read more of the new book Mr. Bossard assigned. They had the next midterm in a few weeks, after all. And Bertholdt didn't really have anything to do, anyways. He did have a laptop like Reiner, but he never really was interested in electronics besides his phone. And really, he only used his phone for texting or calling. But, it was really difficult to go through college without a laptop. Bertholdt felt bad for kids that had to type and print out their papers at the library. 

He grew bored of his book within forty minutes. Still had time, though. He decides to take out his phone to try and text someone. He pauses over Annie's contact. It was a Wednesday, and it was almost twelve in the afternoon. She was at work, if he was not mistaken. Lame. He opened Reiner's contact. He begins to type a message.

“ _Am I allowed to text you during your class? Well, I am anyways. Hi, Reiner. I'm bored._ ”

He sends it nervously. After a few minutes pass, with no reply from Reiner, Bertholdt lifts a hand and begins nibbling at his finger tips. Thankfully, about twenty seconds after he begins to continue his unsightly habit, he gets a text reply. It distracts him from biting his abused fingertips.

“ _Hi, Bored. when a turtle leaves its shell, is it naked, or did it just leave its home?_ ”

The hell? Bertholdt furrows his brow. He actually pauses to think about it. Can turtles even live without their shell? He assumes so, because he's never seen a turtle...well. Shell-less. Ultimately, you can survive without either concealment or shelter, but you're more likely to live with the shelter. So seeing as a turtle most likely can't survive without its shell, it can't live without it's “home”.

“ _Uh. Is this related to your lecture? I would think it's home. If this is like, a joke question or something. In reality, its leaving neither. Its leaving a part of it's body._ ”

He gets a reply swiftly, and it brings a soft smile to his lips.

“ _i was excited to prove you wrong when you said home, but you caught yourself at the end there. dang it. Anyways. im bored too. thought that would entertain both of us. it did on my part. Also sometimes I think about how you fell in a dumpster as a kid and it makes me laugh. Oh no im thinking about it again. trying not to lol in class._ ”

Bertholdt chuckles as he reads the beginning of the text, but when he reads the last few sentences, he blushes and frowns. That only reminded him of the embarrassment. Stupid Annie. Reiner probably thought less of him now. Who even _fell in a dumpster_? Bertholdt had been reaching for Annie's precious bear ear muffs that had somehow fallen inside, and his grip slipped on the cold side of the dumpster. Luckily, he only landed on cardboard, but still. Annie thought it was amusing. Bertholdt had suspected she did it on purpose, dropping her ear muffs inside of it. 

“ _Shut up oh my god. I was trying to do a good deed!! Can't you focus on that rather than the humiliation?? What about you, huh? Since you know something embarrassing about me, you have to tell me something embarrassing about your childhood!_ ” Bertholdt angrily typed a text back, maybe getting worked up over it. He just hated when people brought that up, honestly.

He runs his hands over his red face after he put his phone down, and then sighs heavily. Glancing at the clock, he had about thirty minutes. He could leave in like, twenty five. Five minutes would be enough to make it to class. Then he thinks (with mild irritation) about Reiner's mention of that horrific memory, and then blushes all over again. He groans and hides his face behinds his hands. He even brings his legs up and hides behind them. Reiner was so dumb.

His phone buzzes by his side. He drops his hands and shakes his head while grabbing his phone with his shaky fingers. Drawing open the text, he reads it with a shy smile.

“ _Bertl, don't even get me started. Ok ok well. Shit. I have so many to choose from_ ”, that makes Bertholdt laugh, “ _well. one time in 7th grade science class, we had to dissect a frog right. well ok im squeamish over dead things. and. guts. and stuff. so I was the hesitant partner. I was grouped with Ymir actually, at the time.anyways she was all tough and was splitting open the frog. and I was just standing aside, and then she takes out some of the squishy organs and then pretends to fling it at me. I literally shriek like a girl and run in the opposite direction. all in all, I hit the corner of the desk and fell face first onto the floor. I had a bad bloody nose and had to go to the nurses office. it was bad. The girl I liked at the time (Rei Rei girlfriend in middle school) was there so it was 10x more embarrassing._ ”

Bertholdt feels more sympathetic (and thinks that's kind of cute for someone like Reiner to be freaked out by that sort of thing) than amused by the story. He smiles softly, thinking that he wished he had been there to comfort Reiner. Maybe that would have been weird if he was really given the chance at the time, but he still wishes he could have. Bertholdt would have died from humiliation. Reiner was stronger than him though, so maybe he took it in stride.

“ _I actually feel bad for you Reiner. Look at how nice of a friend I'm being, I'm not laughing at your embarrassment._ ” Bertholdt feels strangely giddy and happy. He knows its because he's talking to Reiner. Reiner was really nice to talk to. He knew how to make Bertholdt feel better. Reiner replies within a minute.

“ _I kind of find it amusing myself though, thinking back on it. So I dont mind if u laugh. But hey, if you really are uncomfortable w/ me mocking your dumpster diving, i'll knock it off. B)_ ”

Bertholdt shakes his head with a grin as he hurriedly replies with, “ _Hey, you're just teasing now. And I was_ not _dumpster diving!!! I fell in, u dumbass!!_ ” Reiner was just working him up, but Bertholdt found it funny. He giggles to himself as he sends it.

“ _B))))_ ”, is all the reply he gets. Laughing quietly, Bertholdt continues to shake his head. Then he realizes he has about ten minutes, looking at the time on his phone, and stands to get ready. He sends a last text to Reiner, “ _I enjoy texting with you. Your idiocy amuses me. But alas, I have a class to go to. And unlike you, I intend to pay attention rather than text! So talk to you later, Rei Rei._ ” With a smile lingering on his lips, he puts his phone away, puts on his coat and scarf, before he grabs his bag and leaves the dorm room after locking the door. 

With his great mood present, he's able to survive through his least favorite class. And for once, he laughed quietly at his white-haired Calc professor's jokes.


	11. Chapter 11

The following morning of a heavy rain storm, Bertholdt awoke with a dizziness, and slowly propped up on an elbow. When the first heavy rain fall had begun, Bertholdt was walking back to the dormitories. Sadly, he had been unprepared, and ended up being thoroughly soaked. Which was a drag. So when he felt a heaviness upon his body and a dry throat the next morning, Bertholdt wondered if he had gotten sick from the constant cold and rainy days. Sighing, Bertholdt fell back onto his pillow, the weight of supporting himself becoming too much. He massages his aching head as he tiredly gazes at the dark ceiling. Reiner is snoring loudly, and it isn't really helping his headache. 

Luckily, it was Saturday. If he did have a cold, he hopes it passes by Monday. He would hate to ask someone for the notes for any of his classes. The only person he really felt comfortable with, enough to actually talk to them, was Marco. That was only one class though.

Bertholdt closes his eyes momentarily. He swallows, and feels how dry his mouth and throat is. Again, he eases onto an elbow. He'll have to get a glass of water before going back to sleep. His legs feel like lead when he slips them out past the comforter of his bed. The floor is cold upon his feet and it makes him bare his teeth with a hiss. But he tolerates it and stands cautiously. He wobbles a little bit, and then he steadily begins towards the bathroom.

Well..they don't really have cups in here, so he just takes drinks with cupping his hands. The water feels nice in his dry throat. He sighs and takes a few more mouthfuls before he's satisfied. After drying his hands, he returns to the dorm room, briefly glances over at Reiner's sprawled out form, and then paces quietly to his bed. He feels a little light-headed.

Once he's under his covers once more, he closes his eyes and exhales deeply. He grasps for unconsciousness once more. 

 

He's awoken the second time from loud noises. There was heavy footsteps and boisterous clattering. Blearily, he blinks his eyes open and slides his gaze over to Reiner, who was moving his desk around. Bertholdt rubs at his eyes, and slowly sits up. He sighs and licks his dried lips, eyes downcast to his lap. 

“Oh, hey. Morning”, he hears spoken to his side. He looks over and Reiner wasn't pushing at the desk anymore, but was looking over at Bertholdt with raised eyebrows. Bertholdt gave a weak wave with his fingers and then placed that hand over his forehead. He had a headache already.

“You're up later than usual. Even I got up before you.”

“Yeah”, Bertholdt murmurs, keeping his eyes closed from the bright light, “I think I'm sick.” Reiner pauses, and then approaches him on the bed. Bertholdt looks up at him with squinting eyes and a furrowed brow. Reiner looks down at him with a stern expression, and then he raises an arm. Startled, Bertholdt's eyes widen when Reiner slides his warm hand under Bertholdt's, feeling his forehead. Bertholdt's bangs rest over his fingers.

“You're really hot”, Reiner confirms. Bertholdt's previously warmed face fills more with blood, and couldn't Reiner have phrased that in any other way? Reiner lets his hand linger for a moment, before pulling it away. 

“You need some orange juice or something. My mom always forced me to drink some when I was sick. It usually made me feel better. I'll get you some”, Reiner says, gazing down at Bertholdt's flushed, sweaty features and then he turns to approach the door. He yanks on his boots before leaving the room. He just disregarded his previous task, apparently. Bertholdt stares at the closed door, bewildered. 

After a minute of silence, he lays back down onto his bed and sighs. He places his long fingers over his forehead. His forehead doesn't seem that warm to him. Huh. He drops his arm and closes his eyes from the blaring light. He doesn't fall asleep though. He waits for Reiner to return. When he thinks about how Reiner actually stopped working on his own personal task, for Bertholdt's sake, it makes him blush and feel really grateful and flattered. Which he realized was stupid, because Reiner was just doing something so simple, that was merely an act of kindness. Either way, it flustered Bertholdt. 

Reiner returned about ten minutes later. When the door opened suddenly, it startled Bertholdt from his fantasizing, and he sat up to see Reiner shuffle in with what appeared to be a jug of orange juice, a little package of plastic cups, a small bottle of pain reliever pills. He spills it all onto Bertholdt's desk. Then he grabs the small table in front of his own bed, where he typically set his laptop, and pulls it over to Bertholdt. 

“Um..you don't have to do so much for me, Reiner..”, Bertholdt quietly says, looking up at Reiner through his bangs. He fidgets with his blanket, and notices Reiner give him a smile. Then he turns away to approach his desk, and then rips open the package of plastic cups. He pulls one out, and fills it with orange juice.

He turns back after grabbing the pain reliever bottle and sets both things on the small table. “You're right. I don't have to. But I want to, so you're going to have to deal with it”, Reiner muses as he looks down at Bertholdt with his hands on his hips. Bertholdt flicks his gaze over Reiner's body. He was wearing a long-sleeved t-shirt, that maybe was too tight on his chest. Reiner tended to wear tight-fitting shirts anyways. He was wearing some dark jeans too. 

“Okay. Thank you”, Bertholdt murmurs, and drops his gaze shyly. Reiner begins towards the door again, and pauses to look over at Bertholdt, “You hungry? I'll get you some soup or something.” Bertholdt opens his mouth, looking up at Reiner, and begins to protest but as soon as Reiner hears it, he just simply leaves. Sighing, Bertholdt warily looks over at the small table. This was strange...but kind of nice. No one really cared for him like this before, when he was sick. His mother had, when he was a little boy, but since then, his dad merely gave him some medicine, and just left Bertholdt to get over it.

Bertholdt reaches for the cup of orange juice, and takes a careful sip. It had pulp. He liked it that way. He smiles and takes a big gulp. He sighs gratefully and takes one more drink before setting it aside for now. He feels light-headed, so he lays back down once more. For a moment, he gazes out into the room, his thoughts drifting to Reiner's thoughtfulness. With a light smile, he then closes his eyes. He was still kind of sleepy. 

He rests for a good while, until the door opens again, loudly, and it startles him. Raising his head, he sees Reiner walk in with something in his hands.

“They had a microwavable soup..thing available at the deli so I bought the soup there. I was about to microwave it there but then realized it would have cooled by the time I got back”, Reiner begins, blabbering a little as he sets the steaming soup onto the table next to the cup of juice, “So I came back and used the microwave in the lounge room.” He gives Bertholdt a bright grin, standing there, with his hands on his waist, “Luckily, I remembered to get a spoon, too.”

Bertholdt looks up at him, and then drops his gaze to the soup. It was chicken noodle, of course. He smiles lightly, and flicks his olive green eyes up to Reiner, “Thank you, Reiner.” Reiner nods promptly. Bertholdt knows the soup would be too hot to consume right now, so he says gently, “Um. Could you grab my book for me? Its on my desk..” Reiner instantly turns on his heel and snatches it before he walks back and hands it to him. Bertholdt thanks him again quietly before he sits straighter and opens it to his dog-eared page.

He briefly raises his gaze to Reiner, who is watching him, before shyly dropping his gaze back to the page again. Then he hears Reiner walk away towards his own desk. Bertholdt finds his place and begins to continue where he left off. He hears clattering, so he raises his eyes again to see Reiner pulling his desk chair up to the side of the bed.

“What are you doing?” Bertholdt asks once Reiner takes a heavy seat and leans forward to set his clothed forearms on his knees. Reiner quirks a brow and then smiles, “I'm sitting, Bertl. Isn't that obvious?” Bertholdt furrows his brow, book open in his hands, and then says, “Reiner, why are you sitting by my bedside?”

“I thought I could keep you company”, Reiner claims and gazes into Bertholdt's green eyes. It intimidates Bertholdt, so he drops his gaze to his lap. Bertholdt mumbles a moment later, “You don't have to...I don't want to keep you from your weekend, Reiner.” Reiner hums, and sits back in his chair. He shrugs and runs a hand over his head, “I never really liked being neglected when I was sick, so..I thought you wouldn't like it either. Well. Unless you want me to stop pestering you, just tell me and I'll leave you be.”

Bertholdt looks at him then, and frowns, “You're just going to sit there? The entire time?” Reiner shrugs again, “As long as you want me to sit here, I'll sit here.” Bertholdt blushes a little, and nods. He doesn't feel comfortable enough to just read, making Reiner sit there in silence and boredom. Well, its not like he wants Reiner to have to sit there in the first place, but still.

“Reiner”, he begins after a moment of silence, and earns Reiner's gaze from where it was fixed on the floor. Bertholdt looks into his eyes, “I don't want you to waste your time on me. Seriously, go back to whatever you were doing. I can survive, you know.” He offers a light, reassuring smile to Reiner. Reiner looks at him with a raised brow, hands on his knees, and then he grins. 

“Alright, alright, I can tell you're just letting me off easy. I'll stop bothering you”, he says as he stands, hands raised in a gesture of understanding. Bertholdt huffs before retorting, “You're not bothering me!” Reiner looks at him with a mildly amused expression, and then he nods. Bertholdt flushes, embarrassed, before saying hurriedly, “J-just do whatever you want.” Reiner smirks, pausing and looking at Bertholdt, “Oh really? What if I _want_ to sit at your side?” Bertholdt scowls at him with red in his cheeks, and Reiner laughs before he turns away to return to whatever he was doing previously. 

Actually, it was pretty distracting. The loud movements nearby distracted Bertholdt from reading peacefully. The noises of Reiner pushing the desk and his small grunts earned Bertholdt's curious eyes a few times. What was Reiner even trying to achieve? 

Eventually, he finishes by pushing his desk against the wall to the right of the wall that the desk was previously positioned at. It was opposite of the door. Ah, then Bertholdt understands. It was under the window, so maybe Reiner just wanted to have the window above his desk. Or maybe he just felt like moving things around. Either way, Bertholdt returns to his reading once Reiner is satisfied and returns to his bed to retrieve his laptop. The chime of Reiner's laptop starting fills the silence. Listening to Reiner's typing, Bertholdt continues to read his book with a light smile upon his lips. Then Reiner relocates to his desk with his laptop. 

Reiner draws open the drapes to the window, before he takes his seat again and returns to his laptop. The brief distraction that had earned his gaze reminds Bertholdt of his soup. He cautiously feels the exterior of the container, and decides it may be cool enough. He takes the spoon, scoops up a little bit of the broth and noodles, before leaning over and pressing it to his lips. Quietly, he tastes it. It seems cool enough. Its hot on his tongue, but not unbearably. He hums and takes a few more spoonfuls. Setting his book aside, he takes a hold of the soup container and sits back in his bed. He eats at the soup thoughtfully, and mentally thanks Reiner. He doesn't want to disturb the blond from whatever he was doing on his laptop with a mere thanks.

The soup feels warm and pleasant in his belly. He sighs gratefully and once he's done with the soup, he sets it aside. His headache is still apparent, and his body continues to feel heavy, but the food in his stomach makes him feel a little better. The pulsing headache and mildly sore throat urges him to take one of the pills out of the pain reliever bottle. He puts it in his mouth before swallowing it down with some orange juice. He glances over at Reiner as he does so, and gazes at his back and then up to the back of his head. He was leaning forward, propping his head in his hand, so his back was a little hunched. This tightened his shirt and clung close to his broad back.

Bertholdt dropped his gaze and averts his train of thought to something else, rather than what it was veering off to. Maybe reading his book again would be a good thing. He sets his cup of orange juice aside and grabs his book once more. 

\----------

“ _I'm sick x_x_ ”, Bertholdt texts to Annie the next day, when Reiner had gone out. He was simply bored, and decided texting his friend on her day off would probably entertain him. While he waits for her reply, he aimlessly looks through his photo album. The pictures were mostly of his pet ferret back at home. Some of them were of Annie. Most were of her just doing daily things. Sometimes she was aware of his photo taking, and sometimes she wasn't. One photo was of her carefully removing a piece from a Janga set with a concentrated expression upon her face. Bertholdt smiles when he remembers the time she spent the night at his house, out of town, and they had set that up to play. Another was her making the most unamused expression at the phone. He lingered on a picture of her smiling at something past the view of the camera. He received a text reply.

“ _my poor Bertholdt. Want me to come over and pamper you? I can get you hot chocolate and give u back rubs and read you a story and sing you a song, if you wanted me to._ ”

Bertholdt felt embarrassed as he read it, and then realized she was sarcastic by the end of it. His face flushes as he replies, “ _Annie, your back rubs are the worst. You always make me feel so stiff afterwards._ ” He gets a reply almost immediately.

“ _Why would my back rubs be the worst if they make you stiff?_ ”

Bertholdt sputters at that, horrified, and hurriedly replies, “ _Idiot, you know what I mean!!!_ ” He can almost _hear_ her snickering. He huffs and makes a frustrated expression. He just ends up looking silly, though. Annie replies soon.

“ _You seem more irritable when you're sick. Huh. I am so so so sorry then bertholdt, plz forgive my clever joke, if it may have offended your delicate feelings_ ”

Bertholdt rolls his eyes.

“ _now you're just being sarcastic. Not that that's any different, though!! Jeez, Annie, I thought texting you would lessen my boredom but only my irritation has increased. You're so mean sometimes_ ”

“ _hey now, what did you expect? I wouldn't go easy on you just because you're sick._ ”

Bertholdt frowns. Just then, the door opens, and Reiner strides in. Glancing up, Bertholdt notices how Reiner's short blond hair is matted down. His eyes are stern and his mouth is in a twisted scowl. Bertholdt, surprised, asks gently, without a greeting, “Reiner, what's wrong?” Instantly, Reiner stops, and looks over at him with his sour expression totally gone. He blinks and then quietly shuts the door behind him. He yanks off his dripping leather coat and shakes it out. He should have done that outside the room, but Bertholdt doesn't scold him this time.

“Nothin'. How you feeling, Bertl?”, he asks with a brighter tone and expression. His boots thud on the floor as he walks over to his bed. He's tracking water all over the hardwood, but Bertholdt is too tired, weak, and bewildered to raise his voice against it.

Why did Reiner look so angry?

“Um. I'm feeling a little better. Still a little weak, but I can handle it. I could ask you the same, though.”

Reiner looks at him from where he took a seat on his bed, and then drops his gaze to work on his boots. Bertholdt can't see his expression. “Just annoyed at the rain.”, he grumbles, and yanks off a boot. He kicks it aside and it stumbles on the hardwood floor. The rain must have been a real dick today, then.

“Well...okay.”, Bertholdt says quietly, watching as Reiner pulls off his other boot. Reiner doesn't speak again, or look up at him for that matter, as he situates himself onto his bed. Instead of taking out his laptop like Bertholdt expected, he takes out his phone.

Bertholdt had forgotten about Annie, but was reminded when a buzz came from his phone. He looked back down to his lap where his phone resided in his hands, and opened the message. Uh...it was from Reiner. He glances over, and sees Reiner obviously trying to hide a small smile. It seems, just like that, Reiner is more like himself.

With a quirked brow, Bertholdt looks back at the message again.

“ _u look like shit tbh_ ”

Bertholdt blushes and then he can't help but smile a little. Reiner was joking, obviously. He shakes his head as he types back a reply, “ _Aren't you describing yourself? I'm glad you finally noticed. Being in denial isn't a good thing, you know, Reiner_ ”

After he sent it, a moment later, he hears Reiner make a muffled snort. Reiner's thumbs are swift with replying.

“ _I_ am _The Shit, thank you very much._ ”

Bertholdt's smile extends, and he begins to type back.

“ _That's nothing to be proud of, just so you know_ ”

“ _Hey I am proud of The Shit title, okay_ ”

“ _Why are you even texting me if you're like, seven feet away?_ ”

That makes Reiner chuckle.

“ _Because I wanna. U gonna stop me?_ ”

Bertholdt glances over at Reiner. He can tell that Reiner knows that he's looking, but he's obviously pretending to not notice. He's trying to force down his grin, with failure.

“ _yeah I'm going to forcible restrain you from texting me with my frail, sickly body._ ”, Bertholdt retorts sarcastically, and gets a reply almost immediately, based on Reiner's quick typing.

“ _I would so be able to overthrow your scrawny ass. I could easily pin you down, okay, I have four years of high school football to show for it_ ”

Bertholdt's eyes widen at that, and he feels his cheeks grow hot. He was mildly insulted over the 'scrawny' bit, but its totally wiped from his concern. He shakily replies.

“ _Excuse you, Reiner, I've been doing gymnastics since I was ten. Gymnastics isn't exactly a laid back sport, you know_ ”

Reiner laughs aloud then, not even bothering to hide it, and he chucks a pillow at Bertholdt. Bertholdt giggles with a completely red face as he blocks it from smacking into him. This was so silly, but it made them both feel better.

“Hey, I am so taking you up on that later.”, Reiner says loudly, and Bertholdt laughs cheerfully as he casts Reiner an amused expression. Reiner shakes his head as he grins widely. This was _very_ silly, but Bertholdt was enjoying it. Reiner seemed to be, as well. 

All Bertholdt recalls during the times he was sick, was suffering alone and without a care from his father. Now though, he felt like Reiner really was concerned about how he felt. It made Bertholdt feel happy, and that he wasn't so alone. Bertholdt is glad, out of everyone he could have been paired with, he ended up with Reiner.


	12. Chapter 12

Sadly, Bertholdt was too ill to attend his classes on Monday. He still felt a weakness, and his sinuses were still annoyingly clogged. The weariness prevented him from leaving the room. Although, Bertholdt had gotten up to get ready to attend his class. It was late in the day, so Reiner had been up before him. As soon as Bertholdt began to change out of his pyjamas, Reiner stopped him and insisted he still needed to rest. If he were to leave and put a strain on himself, it would only bring his sickness back in it's full force.

Grudgingly, Bertholdt relented and went back to bed. Reiner returned to his laptop once he was sure Bertholdt fell asleep once more.

 

By nine on Monday night, the same day, Bertholdt noticed his sinuses were cleared. He still felt a little weak, but not as much. He wasn't so tired, seeing as he's been sleeping all day. When he stayed up with Reiner, he realized how late the other actually stayed up. He usually went to bed at two in the morning. No wonder he usually sleeps in. 

At nine though, Bertholdt was dying of boredom. He finished his book by then. He did aimlessly go on the Internet on his laptop, but that interest quickly died. He reviewed his notes for class, but he could only go so far with that. It was a quarter after nine when Reiner returned from whatever he was doing. Bertholdt was resting on his side, drifting off to a light nap, when the door opened. Propping up on an elbow, Bertholdt looked over at Reiner. 

His face was flushed and his hair was a complete mess. His face was stern, but his eyes were unfocused. Bertholdt stares as Reiner quietly shuts the door behind himself. He leans against it and stares at the floor until Bertholdt speaks up.

“Reiner, are you okay?”

That seems to jerk Reiner back into reality, and he averts his eyes to Bertholdt. He gives a shaky nod and walks over to sit at his own bed. He stares at the floor again. Obviously, Reiner wasn't, but Bertholdt wouldn't prod. If Reiner wasn't going to share what he was doing earlier, or what happened, it wasn't of Bertholdt's concern. 

So he turned his back to the dazed Reiner and faced the wall. He stared until his eyelids grew heavy, and then he closed them with a sigh. A few minutes later, he hears Reiner remove his boots, and then take a seat at his desk. The chime of his laptop starting fills the silence. Bertholdt withdraws his phone from under the mass of his blankets.

Despite it seeming like an unpleasant taste on his tongue, Bertholdt texts to Reiner with shaky fingers, “ _How are things with Christa, anyways? You haven't talked about her at all recently._ ” He would rather this be kept through texting. It seems like Reiner doesn't want to talk anyways. He hears the vibrations of Reiner's phone on the desk a moment later. He listens as Reiner type up a reply, after a long minute of silence. 

“ _things are okay. Why?_ ”

Bertholdt furrows his brow. What does 'okay' exactly mean? He hesitates, before replying.

“ _Just wondering. um._ ”

He sends that, and then realizes how stupid that sounds. He hides his face in the sheets and sighs. He's such an idiot. Obviously Reiner doesn't want to be bothered, based on his attitude. Bertholdt was just concerned, even though he shouldn't be. Seeing Reiner troubled isn't something he wants to see. Bertholdt waits for a reply. None came.

He knows he should just let it be. Reiner doesn't want to text him. That much is obvious through his brief text, and the lack of a reply. But Bertholdt feels like he should let Reiner know. He types a fresh text with a small blush building in his cheeks.

“ _Reiner, you know I can always listen. I can be there for you, like you have been for me. We are friends, right?_ ”

Bertholdt sends it instantly, as soon as a small inkling of hesitation passes through his mind. He wanted Reiner to know that he cares. He lets out a shaky breath when Reiner's phone vibrates angrily on the wood of his desk. Bertholdt feels his face burn. He counts the seconds, and then hears Reiner begin to reply. He worries at his lip. When his phone buzzes, his heart leaps.

“ _yeah. thanks. I'll keep that in mind, Bertl._ ”

A familiar swelling of adoration fills his chest. Bertholdt is so relieved Reiner can trust him in that way. Realizing the sweet sensation of happiness in his chest, Bertholdt flushes and tries to brush it away. No need to get worked up over some little texting. He exhales deeply, shakily, and puts his phone to sleep. Knowing Reiner considers him a friend brings a soft smile to his lips. 

Then Bertholdt decides he should go to sleep for his classes the next day. He wasn't feeling as sickly anymore, anyways. He puts his phone on Reiner's small table by his side, and takes the chance to look over at Reiner. Reiner's back was to him, and he was focused on his laptop again. Bertholdt drops his gaze and turns back to the wall. He then sits up entirely, and scoots to the end of his bed, before reaching over to turn off the light. Reiner doesn't speak a complaint, so Bertholdt falls back onto his bed and snuggles back under his blankets. With a happiness, Bertholdt closes his eyes and lets his thoughts drift as he welcomes slumber. 

\----------

The next day, its actually not rainy. Or _too_ cold. And its not cloudy either! Which was truly a gift for Bertholdt. The sun was shining gently down, which may prevent Bertholdt from getting sick again. It was nice enough that Bertholdt didn't have to wear his coat. Instead, he chose to pull on a evergreen colored hoodie. He still felt a little light-headed getting ready for his classes, but it was a lot better than how he felt yesterday. Reiner seemed to be back to normal. He greeted Bertholdt with a grin, following the day of his strange silence. 

Bertholdt was glad.

Throughout the day, Bertholdt felt actually pretty good. He was in a good mood due to the fact the majority of his classes didn't cover anything too devastating. The class that _did_ go over something important was Mr. Bossard's, ,and luckily, Marco was in that class with him.

 

It was after Mr. Bossard closed the lecture when Bertholdt looked over to his side, where Marco usually sat. Bertholdt liked having Marco sit with him. As Marco was pulling his books together into his arm, Bertholdt says gently, “Uh, Marco?” Instantly, Marco glanced at him with a smile.

“Yes?” He responds as he hoists his books further in his grasp. He uses his hip to support the weight of them. He watches Bertholdt, and it kind of intimidates Bertholdt..

“Um. I don't want to seem selfish, for asking this, but ...could I borrow your notes from yesterday's lecture? You must have noticed I was not here..”, Bertholdt asks in a quiet voice, fiddling with his books in his arms. As students file out of the lecture hall, Marco looks at him with a bright eye.

“Oh! Of course, Bertholdt. Were you sick?” Marco asks with a quick voice, as he puts his books down again (which made Bertholdt feel guilty) to begin shuffling through his folder. Bertholdt nods, and replies softly, “Yes. And thank you, really.” Marco gives him a grin that displays his cute dimples, “No problem!” Then he goes back to finding the page. He exclaims with an “aha!” as he finds it, and plucks it out.

“I won't need it, so go ahead and take as long as you need to go over it. Um, if you have any questions, just text me, you know?” Marco says cheerfully as Bertholdt takes it. His smile remains on his lips, and Bertholdt returns it lightly. 

“Thank you”, he says again, and then he sets his own things down to gather Marco's books.

“Oh!”, Marco says as Bertholdt places them in the crook of his arm gingerly. Marco looks embarrassed as he quietly murmurs, “Y-you didn't have to do that...” Bertholdt flushes in the face and wildly wonders if he offended him. What if he didn't even need help with that? Did he make him feel bad for assuming he did? He was so stupid! How could he assume such a thing? Marco was probably really embarrassed...

“I hope you feel better, Bertholdt”, Marco says, suddenly, but with a sincere tone, and it diverts Bertholdt's panicked thoughts. Bertholdt shakily raises his gaze back at him and then nods, “T-thanks.” God, this is so awkward. Then Marco gives a dip of his head, says goodbye, and hurries out of the aisle. Standing there, Bertholdt hides his face in one of his palms and sighs. He had to make it so weird, didn't he? After a moment of self-belittling, Bertholdt turns to grab his books. He didn't have a class for a long period, so he shuffles out of the room and begins towards the dormitories.

\----------

After classes on the following day, Bertholdt realizes his symptoms are entirely gone. He's no longer weak or light-headed, and his headaches have ceased for the most part. That's good. The realization puts him in a good mood. He won't have to worry about getting sick again, then. Seeing as he just finished with his last lecture of the day, he hurries towards the dormitories. 

The sun is still persistent with showing itself, so the cold is still absent. Wearing only a long sleeved navy blue t-shirt, Bertholdt feels the warmth filter onto his arms past his sleeves. It feels nice. He smiles lightly when he pauses at the entrance of the dorm building. He stands there with his books hooked in his arms, enjoying the warm sunlight a moment more, before he turns and pushes into the building. Its cooler inside. 

He begins the trek up the stairs. 

In the hallway, its even colder than the lobby, like usual. Its not as bad as it could have been though. The warmth of the day doesn't contribute to the cold temperature of the hallway. He hurries to their door at the end of the hallway. He pauses though, when he notices the door is slightly ajar. He glances in, and sees it empty, but the light is on. Reiner's laptop is open on his small table as well.

“..No way! He definitely does not have the balls to do that with you of all people!”, Bertholdt hears suddenly, shouted down the hall. Its Connie's voice. Leaning back from the doorframe, Bertholdt sees Connie jabbing a finger at none other than Reiner. Reiner is laughing and nods his head and says something that Bertholdt can't catch. Connie laughs then, before his eyes fall upon Bertholdt across the hallway and then he calls, “Yo, Bertholdt! Reiner just told me--”

Reiner quickly glances over towards Bertholdt, and then turns back to smack Connie on the arm, silencing his words. Connie laughs aloud again and Reiner says something sternly. Connie gives a sneer and a shrug, and then Reiner is turning to jog over to Bertholdt.

“H-hey”, Reiner greets breathlessly, giving a weak grin. Bertholdt looks him up and down. “Hello..?” Bertholdt replies warily, before giving Connie a glance, and then enters the dorm room. He sets his books on his desk and sighs as he takes a heavy seat on his bed. He's tired from the climb up the stairs, really. 

As Bertholdt works on removing his shoes, Reiner lingers at the door. Bertholdt notices and glances up at him as he yanks off one of his converse shoes. Reiner jolts when Bertholdt looks at him, and paces in after shutting the door behind him. 

“I'm still gonna prove you wrong, you know, Bertl.”

Reiner suddenly speaking earns Bertholdt's gaze again. Bertholdt pauses working on his other shoe when he processes what he said. He quirks a brow, looking over at Reiner who was sitting on his bed with his hands on his thighs. 

“...What are you talking about?” Bertholdt asks with a monotone voice, staring at Reiner's amused expression. He pulls off his shoe as Reiner speaks again. 

“That I could beat you when it comes to strength!”

Stunned, Bertholdt looks up at him with a bewildered expression. Then the recollection hits him. _Oh._ Reiner was still going on about that? Really? He was serious? Bertholdt crosses his arms and disregards his haphazard shoes for now. 

“Reiner, you're not messing with me, right?”

Reiner shakes his head, and replies in a stern tone, “Not at all. I'm curious to who could pin the other. But then again” He pauses and raises his arms to flex them obnoxiously, flashing Bertholdt a stupid grin, “Who could beat these beauts?” 

Bertholdt gives him an unamused look. Okay, that was mildly annoying. But..Bertholdt's eyes linger on Reiner's arms longer than they should have. With frustration, he fixes his eyes back on Reiner's smug expression.

“Just because of what you just scarred me with, I accept your stupid challenge. Where exactly do you intend to do this?” Bertholdt replies with a blank tone, and then huffs. Reiner is underestimating him. Gymnastics actually requires a lot of upper body strength. Even if Bertholdt wasn't able to go to the gymnasium last weekend because of his illness, its not like he's gone weak. Plus, he still does his routines and work outs everyday. (Bertholdt tended to do those when Reiner was out) Reiner looks positively pleased with Bertholdt's agreement.

“Here's fine”, Reiner claims, gesturing to the hardwood floor that Bertholdt, in fact, does not want to wrestle around on. But the expression that Reiner has upon his features makes Bertholdt hesitate. Reiner gives him a look that suggests he should accept or he would be seen as a wimp, if he insisted upon going to a more safe location. Whatever. It doesn't bother Bertholdt. He can easily do this here, its just Bertholdt didn't prefer having his head smacked against a hard floor.

“Its not, but obviously you insist upon it”, Bertholdt grumbles. This was stupid, but there was no way he was going to let Reiner's ego inflate even more. He felt like proving to Reiner he did not have a 'scrawny ass'.

There is a considerable amount of space in the room. The beds are positioned against the walls, as well as the desks, so it leaves a big area in the center. When Reiner grins and stands, Bertholdt shakes his head. Following Reiner, Bertholdt stands as well. Reiner begins to remove his commonly worn hoodie, and reveals a tight tank-top underneath. Bertholdt sighs as he steps to the center, and Reiner joins him with a smirk, tossing his hoodie back on his bed. It appears like he's looking forward to it. Bertholdt stared down at Reiner's expression.

“Well. It looks like I'm not going to be able to stretch properly, am I?” Bertholdt muses, and Reiner laughs lightly as he cracks his knuckles. Bertholdt rolls his eyes, before speaking once more.

“Okay then. How are we doing this?”

“Just whatever, we start it standing first. But hey, we'll see what it leads to. Obviously, the goal is to pin the other down, for at least ten seconds. Sound good?”

Bertholdt rolls his eyes, and then takes a step back from the other. He glances around, processing his surroundings (desk a few feet back, his bed a ways away from his side), and then returns his gaze to Reiner. He nods, before setting his feet apart and bending his knees a little, hands raised slightly by his sides. Reiner cocks a brow, “Ready?” Bertholdt feels a nervous sweat build, but disregards it. With a stern expression, he nods once more, and shakes out his hands.

Reiner gives a teeth revealing grin before he bluntly charges Bertholdt. Bertholdt's eyes remain focused on Reiner's movements, as the bigger male approached swiftly. Then Reiner grabbed him around the sides with his strong arms. Instantly, Bertholdt grabs onto Reiner's broad shoulders, and swings a leg out to kick Reiner's legs out from under him. With a shout, Reiner tumbles onto the floor with his arms hooked around Bertholdt. Bertholdt follows with a shocked cry, landing on him, but immediately catches himself, and takes the opportunity to grab Reiner's arms and pin them above his head. Reiner's eyes are wide with excitement as he grins up at Bertholdt.

For a moment, Reiner tries to yank his arms out from under Bertholdt's strong grip. But Bertholdt holds him down, focusing his upper body strength on keeping him down. For a good six seconds Reiner struggles, before he uses his entire body to throw Berhtoldt off. With a shocked noise, Bertholdt falls on his back by Reiner's side and Reiner instantly follows by moving over him.

Like Bertholdt, he grabs onto Bertholdt's arms and pins them by his sides. Bertholdt squeaks, and feels his face grow hot. His heart thuds in his chest as Reiner pants above him.

“Not that easy, Bertl”, Reiner pants with a wide grin, and Bertholdt gives him a flushed glare. But Reiner made the mistake of remaining propped on his knees. He wasn't entirely sitting on Bertholdt. With the small amount of room Reiner grants Bertholdt, Bertholdt brings his legs in to press his bare feet against Reiner's lower abdomen, and then gives a harsh shove with his strong legs, in an upward angle. Bertholdt hooks his hands around Reiner's wrists, and pulls simultaneously as he uses his legs to lift Reiner over his head.

With a shout, Reiner goes over Bertholdt and lands on his back with a loud thud and a groan. Bertholdt sits up and pants for a moment, breathless. But that mere moment allows Reiner to regain himself, and basically tackle him. It knocks the wind out of Bertholdt. They both tumble to the hardwood floor again. Bertholdt wheezes as he lands on his front, feeling a heavy weight on his back. He bares his teeth when Reiner's strong hands pin his arms behind his back, and shoves his legs apart, promptly disabling his ability to use his legs. Without his legs, he can't have leverage. 

Quickly, this became very suggestive to Bertholdt. He blushes furiously. Reiner is holding him down with a strength that Bertholdt can't handle in this position. His arms are in a vice grip against his back and all he can do is struggle with the upper half of his body. Reiner's legs are hooked over Bertholdt's, forcing him down. Fuck, this was bad.

Not to mention Reiner's hips were slotted right between his legs, so he was pressing down into him in a way Bertholdt wasn't entirely comfortable with. And Bertholdt soon became horrified when he felt that familiar warmth bloom in his lower abdomen. He wiggled under Reiner, hearing Reiner pant loudly above him, desperate to break this humiliating position.

But to no avail. Its only been a mere few seconds, and Bertholdt can't handle it.

“Stop, stop! You win, get off of me!”, Bertholdt shouts, breathlessly, and struggles under him. Reiner laughs and releases his strong hold on his arms. Then he releases his legs, and sits back on his knees. Bertholdt hurriedly turns over and scoots away from the other. Reiner was smirking at Bertholdt, gloating, as Bertholdt pants with a flushed face. 

Before Reiner can even speak, Bertholdt gets up shakily. “E-excuse me”, Bertholdt sputters, before he simply turns and shoves out of the room. With bare feet and quick steps, Bertholdt hurries to the shower room at the end of the hall. He just had to get away. That was so embarrassing...and risky. Bertholdt groans, pausing in the entrance of the changing room to hide his face in his hands. 

He was really sweaty. And not just from the wrestling either. Why the hell did he agree to that? That was so stupid! Do guys even normally do that? Bertholdt drops his hands, looking at the floor with a sour, embarrassed expression, before he enters the changing room. He knows he needs to take a shower though. Both to relax him and to wash away this perspiration that was unwanted. 

Bertholdt worries endlessly if Reiner will follow him here when he's in the middle of undressing. Because it would be really embarrassing if Reiner caught him naked, _and_ half-hard. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Bertholdt chants this to himself as he hurries to escape into a shower stall. 

When he is standing under the warm spray of the shower, his tense shoulders and back grow lax a little bit. He sighs heavily, and places a hand on the stall wall. He leans against it, under the spray, and rubs at his eyes with annoyance. Reiner was such a dumb ass. 

But...Bertholdt can't stop picturing it. Reiner pinning him down like that. Damn it, of course Bertholdt had to become embarrassingly turned on by that. Reiner's strong, controlling hands gripping his forearms like that, against his back. His hands were really warm, too...

Even more embarrassed at his thoughts, Bertholdt blushes harshly and curses under his breath. He was getting wound up over such a little thing. Reiner was probably wondering what happened, seeing as Bertholdt dashed out of the room so suddenly like that. Bertholdt mentally belittles himself until the embarrassment fades away. He's only..thoughtful now.

He takes a seat on the floor against the wall, and stares down at himself. He wasn't half-hard anymore, but his thoughts were still wild. Picturing Reiner forcing him down like that, remembering the feeling of the heavy weight pinning him down, as well as the suffocating warmth, Bertholdt's arousal easily stirs once more. He bites his lip as he closes his eyes. Reiner...could hold him down with ease. Even when Bertholdt was putting up a fight, Reiner still had a heavier body, and a stronger grip. A grip that could control him in a different context entirely.

Bertholdt realizes what he's _actually thinking about_ , and curses once more, before hiding his face in his hands again. He feels blood build in a place he didn't prefer it building. Sighing, Bertholdt drops his hands and spreads his tan thighs. His flushed cock is curled around his hip. Shakily, he secures his fingers around the base. He could feel a sweet warmth coil in his lower belly. 

He lets out a stuttered breath when he begins to languidly stroke himself. He watches through half-lidded eyes as the dark foreskin of his cock moves over the pink head repeatedly. Damn it, he was really doing this, wasn't he? He was actually masturbating to the thought of his roommate fucking him. He was too deep in to back out now.

Sighing, Bertholdt relaxes under the warmth of the water and lazily pulls at his cock until he was fully erect. He strokes loosely over the base, and then tightens his fingers around the head. It evokes quiet pants from him. He becomes disgusted with himself after picturing Reiner over him and doing things that Bertholdt shouldn't think about, so instead he averts his thoughts to the image he usually thinks about when he masturbates.

The man from the gay bar comes back to his mind. The way his stern hands grabbed onto his tan hips. How his steady, harsh hips bucked into Bertholdt's. The way he groaned deeply. Saying such filthy things into Bertholdt's ear as he pleasured the younger male. And _how_ he had kissed Bertholdt was just..breath-taking to think about.

With his hand gripping his arousal, Bertholdt gave quicker tugs as he gasps quietly, eyes screwed shut and mouth slightly agape. As that tight sensation in his gut grows tenser, and he feels the end coming near, his thoughts wildly return to Reiner. Reiner pounding into him, tense muscles dripping with sweat, brow furrowed and mouth open with groans as his strong hands grab onto Bertholdt's hips, tugging him back onto his cock. 

And like that, Bertholdt orgasms with his head pressing back into the wall, hand freezing at the head, capturing the ropes of his ejaculation in his palm. He gasps aloud and shudders, before he pants and releases the tightness of his muscles. With a flushed face and a tight brow, he looks down at his lap, with his hand open. He watches as the cool water of the shower wash away the evidence. 

Well, fuck.

\----------

Bertholdt returns to the room after taking all the time in the world to dry off and get dressed again. He hesitates at the door. But he draws it open after standing there for a moment, deciding he was just being silly. Reiner wouldn't even know what he had just done. With sagged shoulders, Bertholdt walks in and raises his timid gaze. Reiner is sitting on his bed with his laptop in his lap. He raises his honey colored eyes to his roommate, and smiles a little bit. 

“Hey”, he greets, keeping his eyes on Bertholdt.

Blushing, Bertholdt rubs at his neck and feels another sweat break out over his skin. “Uh..I just wanted to take a shower. To get rid of the gross sweat, you know?” Bertholdt mutters, flicking his gaze to and from the blond. Reiner grins and nods, and then says, setting his laptop momentarily aside, “I still win, right?”

“O-of course..”, Bertholdt says softly, and shuts the door quietly behind him. He takes a seat on his bed awkwardly, and presses his knees together, feet firmly planted on the floor. He stares at his feet, hands in his lap. He knows Reiner is still staring at him. 

He expected Reiner to claim football was a superior sport, but instead he remains quiet and then shortly returns to his laptop. Bertholdt exhales deeply, and then he peeks a glance at the other. Reiner's expression is a little tight, but other than that, he seems indifferent. Good. He must not care that much, that Bertholdt randomly left like that. Hopefully it wasn't suspicious. Bertholdt feels shaken up. He wants the day to end and go to bed, but its too early for that.

So instead, he opens his phone, and sends a text to Annie, asking if he could stay over at her house. She easily accepts it, and he gathers his things, finally packing a fresh set of clothing this time, before saying good bye to Reiner and leaving. Reiner was oddly quiet when he had returned, and Bertholdt expected an earful of boasting. Guess not, then. 

Bertholdt is glad he can escape to Annie's place, though. Facing Reiner after what he had done was too nerve-racking, and it made him feel humiliated. How was he going to deal with this?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Sorry for the delay in updating! At least, now the rating of the fic is accurate, haha. Also the Marco appearance was totally unnecessary but I really like including him (~￣▽￣)~


	13. Chapter 13

Typically, Bertholdt talks to Annie about his problems, or whatever Bertholdt can't naturally talk about with others, but this time, there is no way he can let Annie be aware of his attraction to Reiner. Although, maybe she already knew. Sometimes, she seems to know about things before it even applies to Bertholdt. Annie seemed to be knowing when he went to her house. Maybe escaping to her apartment was a bit obvious. Well, it was better than being around Reiner, anyways.

After Bertholdt realized he was too deep in to save himself from this stupid attraction, he tried to avoid the dorm room as much as he could handle. It was easy during the week days. He remained after the lectures for a while, working and discussing things with his professors until he decided he overstayed. Then he would stop at the library, screw around on a computer there while briefly looking at his notes, before going to the Wood center to kill some time. He would return to the dorm room when he became too bored to do anything else. 

Facing Reiner was nerve-racking. He worried endlessly if he was being too apparent with it all, but Reiner seemed to be oblivious, and wrapped up in his own world of, what Bertholdt assumed to be, Christa. That was good. It diverted Reiner's attention. 

Which was strange, because at first, Bertholdt did kind of want to be closer friends with Reiner. But hey, as long as his crush isn't discovered, it doesn't matter how close he is to the blond. 

During the weekend, on Saturday, he escaped to the gymnasium. Reiner had asked if he could come to watch, but Bertholdt refused the request and left a grumpy Reiner in the dorm. Although, when Bertholdt was doing his routines on the beam and on the horizontal bar, Reiner seemed to be there anyways. Due to his thoughts, Bertholdt couldn't even focus on what he was doing for the majority of his time there. He stumbled with his flips on the mat, and even lost his grip on the bar a few times. Which was extremely irritating. By the time he finished with his cool down stretches, he was growing really agitated. 

This always seemed to happen when he had a crush. His crush distracted him during his activities. Whenever he was attracted to someone, so was his mind. Never ending daydreaming and wandering thoughts. It was really unwanted. Bertholdt's mood was sour when he left the gym to return to the campus.

Maybe avoiding his roommate will kill his crush towards him. That's what he decided, following what he had done in the shower earlier that week.

 

So, after returning from the gym (he changed and took a shower there), and Reiner asked him how it was, Bertholdt simply ignored him and started stuffing his things into a bag. He was definitely not going to be stuck in a room during the weekend with Reiner. That wouldn't help. He opens his phone and sends a call through Annie's contact.

“Going to Annie's. Bye”, Bertholdt says blankly, casting a small glance to Reiner's curious expression, before he leaves the room. Annie answers after a few rings.

“Bertholdt”, she greets, as Bertholdt begins to pace towards the staircase at the end of the hall. He notices she sounds a little breathless. Maybe she was at work right now. He sighs and stops at the top of the flight of stairs, before taking a seat. 

“Hey, Annie. Are you busy?”

“...Not really. I'm doing yoga.”

“O-oh...”

“Was there a reason to your call?”

Bertholdt hesitates, and rubs at the back of his neck. He doesn't want to be selfish and take up Annie's time. He just assumed Annie would be cool with it, and didn't consider she had plans. He exhales deeply in a sigh once more, before speaking again in a gentle tone.

“I..was wondering. If I could stay at your place this weekend?”

Without a moment passing, Annie instantly replies, “Does this have to do with Reiner?” Bertholdt blinks in a surprise, and then huffs, “Yeah.” She hums knowingly, and then she makes a small grunt, which supposedly had to do with her yoga. He waits for her to speak again. After a moment, she sighs quietly before saying, “Okay. Lucky for you, I finished work today and I have no shift tomorrow. I have plans on Sunday though, so I dunno how long you could stay then.” Annie's tone suggest he shouldn't complain. He wasn't going to, anyways.

“Okay. Thank you.”

“No problem. Need me to pick you up?”

“No..that won't be necessary.”

“Alright. See you.”

“Bye.”

Annie hangs up and Bertholdt looks down at his phone with a feeling of melancholy. He stands and hoists his bag up on his shoulder. Putting his phone away, he begins down the stairs. Even if he had a car, he liked to avoid using it. He thinks spending so much money on gas is avoidable, but he doesn't want Annie to have to pick him up too, along with letting him stay over. That seems a bit selfish to Bertholdt. When he makes it out of the dormitories, he begins towards the parking lot by the building. He uses his car at most, four times a week, and that's usually when he wants to go to the gymnasium. Everything else he would need is in walking distance. 

Once inside his car (which is considerably cheap, another reason why he doesn't like to drive it around), he sets his bag in the passenger seat before he digs his keys out of the front pocket. The car starts after two tries, and then he backs out of the parking space. He has an uneasy feeling blooming in his stomach, but disregards it. He feels this is the best outcome. 

 

When he arrives at her apartment complex, he hurries to turn off his car and grab his bag. The stairs are a bother to climb. But when he makes it to the door marked with Annie's room number, he feels a little better. He knocks, and he hears quick footsteps past the door. Then within only a moment, the door is drawn open and Annie stands there with her hair up in a tight bun like usual, wearing her white sweater and her yoga pants. Bertholdt smiles and she looks him up and down.

“..Did you just take a shower?”, she greets him with a question, stepping aside. He walks in and set his bag down to begin working on taking off his shoes. “Yeah. I came back from the gym recently”, he answers as he pulls off his shoes. Then he stands, grabs his bag, and looks over at Annie, who was simply watching him with blank eyes. She nods, and then says, “You hungry?” Without even getting a reply in return, Annie turns and paces into the kitchen. Bertholdt looks around, and notices a hot pink mat in front of the TV. 

He hears Annie call, “Well?”

“Oh, uh, not really.”

“I'm assuming you're okay with hot chocolate?”

Bertholdt looks over towards the kitchen, and sees her torso through the opening in the wall. He smiles, “Yeah, sure. It is a little cold today, anyways.” Not to mention the heater in his car was shit, so he was shivering all the way to her apartment. Without a word, she begins to prepare it. As she does, Bertholdt places his bag at the side of the couch and takes a seat. He usually claims the couch anyways. Annie told him she was fine with sharing a bed with him, but Bertholdt would rather not. It seemed Annie didn't care either way.

“So, obviously there's something up with you and Reiner. Spill it.”

Actually, Bertholdt was dreading her bringing it up. He makes this apparent by groaning aloud. He hears her laugh lightly. Crossing his arms, he remains stubbornly silent. He notices after a pause, that Annie is peeking over at him through the opening in the wall. She cocks a brow, and says again, “Well?”

Looking at his lap, Bertholdt gives a shrug. “It's nothin'”, he grumbles, and she scoffs. “Yeah, okay. Bertholdt, did he do something to you? Is that why you're running away to me?”, Annie calls, and he flushes in the face.

“No! He didn't...do anything to me. Sheesh. I just..”

He hesitates, worrying at his lip.

“You just what?”

“I just...I'm avoiding him.”

Annie is silent as she pours Bertholdt's drink. She's even quiet when she paces into the living room, her eyes fixed on the tall boy as she approaches him. He looks up at her when he takes the cup of steaming hot chocolate from her. Annie remains standing, staring at him, and crosses her arms. 

“Why?”

Bertholdt drops his eyes to the brown liquid in his cup, watching the steam rise into the air. Small marshmallows float around in the liquid. He sighs and mumbles, “Because I like him, Annie. I don't want him to know about it.” Annie sighs and then replies, “In what way?” Raising his gaze to her again, he furrows his brow.

“What do you mean?”

“How do you like him?”

Bertholdt blushes and feels awkward. He fails to keep his eyes on her, and lowers his gaze once more. He feels a nervous sweat build under his clothes. Feeling intimidated, he remains quiet. Annie then moves around the couch to take a seat beside him. She brings her legs up to cross them, and then turns to Bertholdt. Flicking his eyes to her, he sees the blank expression upon her face. She doesn't press him further, but its obvious she wants to know anyways.

“I guess..uh..sexually..”, Bertholdt says quietly, and feels his face burn. He turns his face away in an attempt to hide his blush. He hears Annie sigh, “Don't get so shy Bertholdt, its not middle school anymore, you know.” Bertholdt looks back at her with a glare and she smirks at him. Annie drops the smirk though, a moment later, and says, “I'm assuming that's a bad thing?”

Bertholdt wipes away his glare and nods, before taking a careful sip of his warm drink. It feels nice settling in his stomach. Although, he was already warm from his nervous sweating, so it just adds to the uncomfortable heat. 

“Why though? Just tell him you wanna fuck him. It'll probably startle him but what's he going to do? He's definitely not going to shriek and run away, and if he did, I would be pretty amused.”, Annie says bluntly, crossing her arms, eyes fixed on her friend. Bertholdt looks at her with horror, “I am _not_ going to tell him that I want to fuck him!” Annie laughs lightly, and then shrugs, “Then just deal with it. If you don't intend to escalate it, then just let it pass. Don't just ignore the guy though, he's stupid enough to assume you're mad at him or something.” 

Embarrassed, Bertholdt takes drinks of his hot chocolate in an attempt to distract himself from what Annie was actually suggesting. Reiner was completely straight, as far as Bertholdt knew, and was not interested in putting his dick where it did not belong. Bertholdt heaves a sigh and looks over at Annie. 

“I'm not intending for Reiner to become aware of this, you know. So don't tell him, please.”

“Of course not. I'm not that much of a bitch.”

Bertholdt gives her a gentle look, “You're not at all, Annie.” She gives him an unamused look, and Bertholdt smiles lightly in return. She merely waves him off and stands. “So, anything you had in mind to do?”, she asks, realizing that Bertholdt wasn't going to discuss it any further. Bertholdt intended for it to pass, so she lets it be.

“Um..Doctor Who..?”

Annie gives him a light smile and eagerly approaches the TV cabinet to take it out. “I know you would come to appreciate it”, she says as she puts the disk in the player. Bertholdt rolls his eyes and gets up to walk to the closet in the hallway, retrieving some pillows and blankets. They always seemed to search for entertainment in movies and TV shows, but as long as it kept Bertholdt from thinking about Reiner, then it was fine with him. 

\----------

In the morning, he awakens due to the cold. He was using two blankets, but still, he was shivering. His leg was hooked over the back of the couch, and his upper torso was falling off the cushion of the couch. Sighing, he places his hands on the floor and pushes himself back onto the couch with a quiet grunt. He blinks tiredly, looking into the dimly lit living room. Bleak sunlight filters in through Annie's windows.

 

They wound up doing a Doctor Who marathon. In the end, Annie fell asleep against Bertholdt, so he had to carry her to her bed. He didn't want her to have a painful back in the morning, after all. The floor wasn't comfortable. When he had gone into her room, he noticed it was a disaster. Clothes were everywhere and the surfaces of her dresser and desk were cluttered. Realizing he shouldn't have gone inside, he hurries to place her on her bed, and draws the messy covers over her. It had a floral pattern on it. He rights her limbs before briskly leaving the room. Quietly, he shuts the door behind him.

Annie typically kept her apartment clean for appearance sake, Bertholdt supposes as he returns to the living room to begin cleaning up. Its not like it bothered him, he was just mildly surprised. Well, its not like he didn't notice before, that she was messy. Its just due to her apartment's state, he assumed her room would be spotless as well. 

Anyways, Bertholdt woke up in her living room like per usual, and stood up sluggishly, before he began towards the hallway. He enters her bathroom and then relieves his bladder. Following that, he peeks across the hall and notices that her bedroom door is ajar. Silently, he approaches and briefly glances in. Its empty. He turns and softly paces to the living room again. She's gone?

He approaches his jeans by the couch and digs in the pocket to withdraw his phone. There's a text waiting for him. Nervously, he opens it and reads it.

“ _When you awaken, I'll need you to leave for a while. srry, but I mentioned my girl friends are coming over and im not sure you'd wanna be around that. You can fix yourself breakfast, take a shower, whatever. But by two o'clock, at most. Thanks. I can text you when you can come back, if you'd like. If u'd go that far to avoid reiner. Anyways. Talk to you later Bertholdt_ ”

He feels mildly sad that its come to this, but its understandable. Bertholdt was interrupting her weekend, anyways. The phone clock reads 11:53. Sighing, Bertholdt slips the phone back into the pocket of his pants. He gets up to head towards the bathroom. 

 

After making himself a bowl of cereal, he quickly eats it along with one of her Yoplait yogurts, before he brushes his teeth and changes into his other pair of clothing he brought along. Once he's done, its 1:14. He pulls on his shoes, and makes sure he properly cleaned everything he tainted, and everything was in order. Then he grabs his bag and leaves.

He's thankful Annie allowed him to stay. But he shouldn't depend on her, honestly. He should just deal with it. He believes that's what Annie was trying to tell him. That he should handle it himself. Bertholdt knew that he was just using Annie to avoid Reiner, but Annie didn't seem to care that much. At least, he hoped so. His thoughts are full of consideration and worry as he makes his way back to the campus.

When he parks his car in the corner of the parking lot once more, like he usually does, he gets out and looks over at the dormitory building. Each dormitory building had a parking lot nearby, so it wouldn't take him that long to get to it. He locks the car after himself, and then begins towards it, feeling dread curl in his stomach.

Its kind of chilly, so he hurries to the entrance. He didn't pack his coat, so he was only wearing a hoodie for warmth. When he's inside, its not that better, but at least the wind isn't brushing against him. The trek up the staircase isn't one to look forward to. They really needed to install an elevator or something. 

He was getting annoyed with his heavy bag by the second floor. But he survives. The hallway is even colder. He shudders as he hurries to the end of the hall. Hoisting his bag further on his shoulder, he sighs as he approaches the dorm room's door. He takes out his key and attempts to unlock it. Attempts to. Its already unlocked. Honestly, how many times has he told Reiner to _keep the door locked_? He rolls his eyes as he pushes it open.

Opening his mouth to speak, he looks in. The light from the hallway casts into the darkness of the room. He processes the strange squeaking of a bed and breathless moans just as his eyes fall upon two bodies moving on Reiner's bed. What..the hell?

Stunned beyond words, Bertholdt stands there in shock with his hand on the door knob, eyes fixed on Reiner leaning over a girl with his hips and back rolling, eyes screwed shut, with his mouth fallen open as he grunts quietly. In a matter of seconds, Reiner realizes there's a foreign source of light, and lifts his head to look over. His eyes widen considerably when he notices Bertholdt standing there. He stops his movements, and the girl under him jerks her gaze over to the tall boy as well. She had blonde hair splayed out on the pillow, her bright blue eyes widening in shock.

“Bertl--”, Reiner begins, and Bertholdt blinks wildly, horrified, and then instantly steps out of the room, shutting the door behind him roughly. 

He shakes as he stands outside in the hallway, mildly panicking as he desperately wonders why that had to happen to him. Why the fuck did Reiner think it would be a good idea to bring a girl back to their dorm?! Bertholdt instantly begins to gnaw at his fingertips as he wildly questions what he should do right now. 

In the end, he just takes a seat on the cold floor outside their dorm room, bag by his side, and waits for Reiner to finish. He stares at the blood on his fingertips. Well. 

He really had to stop that habit of his, didn't he?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** I just want to say this fic is messy. A messy, messy fic. So if it seems odd at times..just keep in mind that this fic isn't so thoroughly planned out. I just squeezed out a starter for a college AU, and I'm just going wherever its taking me. Also I was looking forward to writing this part, haha.


	14. Chapter 14

Muffled voices can be heard past the door. Bertholdt quietly listens as the voices talk back and forth. And then there's distinct shuffling.

Within only about three minutes, the door is drawn open once more. Lifting his eyes, Bertholdt looks over to see the girl walk out. Her hair is a little messy, but it isn't questionable. She looks down at him, and gives him a small smile. She's fixing her cardigan with petite hands as she says gently, “I'm sorry. It won't happen again.” Her pretty blue eyes remain on Bertholdt's face, and then she looks away to begin down the hallway towards the stairs. Bertholdt had a feeling he's seen her before.

After a long pause, and she's disappeared past his view, Bertholdt wonders if he should go in. But before he could consider it, Reiner suddenly comes out. Looking up, Bertholdt notices how he was wearing only sweatpants. He looked really frustrated and displeased. Bertholdt feels guilty. He ruined it, didn't he? 

Reiner sighs and runs a hand through his short messy hair.

“Look..Bertholdt..”, he begins in a quiet tone, and Bertholdt stands. Grabbing his bag, Bertholdt looks at Reiner. Reiner is staring back. Bertholdt pushes into the room past him. Ignoring the tight feeling in his chest, Bertholdt sets his bag on his bed, and glances over to Reiner's. The covers are in a heap on the floor.

“I..didn't intend for this to happen. Christa came over without me knowing and just..came onto me. I know she was just doing it for comfort but I--”

“You don't have to explain yourself to me, just be sure to lock the door next time.”, Bertholdt cuts him off, as he yanks the zipper to his bag open and begins to pull his things out onto his bed. Reiner stands at the doorway, uncertain, before sternly replying, “There will be no next time.”

“Either way.”

Bertholdt shrugs as he says this and then gives Reiner a light smile, “Its not really my business with what you decide to do. I just don't want to have to walk in on that again.” Reiner is silently staring at him, with his brow knit. Then he nods, and Bertholdt returns to pulling his things out. Reiner hesitates, and then after a minute, reaches out to grab Bertholdt's hand.

Surprised, Bertholdt reflexively attempts to tug his hand away. But Reiner has a strong grasp. Raising his olive green eyes to Reiner's, he silently questions him with his gaze. Reiner is staring at his fingertips. When Bertholdt realizes this, he yanks his hand away and hides it behind his back.

“What are those marks on your fingers? Is that blood? What happened?”

Bertholdt glares at him, and then snaps, “I did it, Reiner, but I don't see how that concerns you.” His annoyance just boiled over for some reason, and his words left his mouth before he could consider the consequences. Reiner looks insulted, and then retorts, “Why would you do that?”

“Its not like I mean to!”, Bertholdt shouts, feeling overwhelmed and angry at the same time. He scowls at Reiner, “What if I'm bleeding a little bit? I can handle it myself, Reiner, jesus.” Reiner gives him a frown. He shakes his head and just walks past Bertholdt to return to his bed. Silently, Bertholdt looks over at him as the blond fixes his bed with harsh movements. Bertholdt drops his gaze and returns to his things, with a scowl upon his face.

\----------

That, honestly, didn't change much. Bertholdt and Reiner still share a dorm, still occasionally talk, and sometimes text. Its not like it was a devastating blow to Bertholdt. Honestly, it bothered him at first, but he forced himself to forget about it. Its not like it really matters, anyways. 

It did change small things, though. Bertholdt doesn't talk first. If Reiner speaks to him, he'll reply. Previously, Bertholdt would ask Reiner if he was interested in grabbing a coffee, and sometimes Reiner would agree to it. Now Bertholdt just goes by himself. Its not a big deal, to him. Reiner had his own thing going on, and that thing did not include Bertholdt. Bertholdt gave up trying to be closer friends with his roommate. They were opposites, with different interests and different intentions. 

Bertholdt still had his stupid crush though. Even after three weeks following him walking in on Reiner and Christa, he still desired the blond dumbass, even if he was annoyed by it. He frequently thought about him, too. It was harder to study for his midterm. But, Marco would whip him back into shape whenever he began to daydream again. Honestly, Marco will probably have a positive influence in Bertholdt's scores in the end. 

And, well, during those three weeks, Marco and Jean were now a thing, apparently. It became apparent when they were all in the lounge room (including Bertholdt because Reiner had dragged him there to challenge him in a table tennis game. Reiner lost), and Marco just decided to give Jean a brief kiss on the lips when they were lazing about. Jean was flustered and Eren was laughing at his expression. No one was really surprised though, besides Connie.

Bertholdt was jealous, actually. He wished he could have a relationship with a close friend. Marco had a strong connection with Jean, that much was obvious. 

 

A month after the whole ordeal with Reiner and Christa, Bertholdt's attraction to Reiner was getting ridiculous. Bertholdt usually was careful with hiding his crush, but he couldn't help but stare past the top of his book whenever Reiner would change. His stupid muscular arms and his stupid abs and his stupid warm hands that Bertholdt wanted to grab him in places that weren't deemed entirely appropriate. When it came to those kinds of thoughts, Bertholdt would look away and pretend he never thought of such a thing. It was a cycle, really. 

One of those times though, Reiner noticed. He was changing his shirt after returning to the dorm. He had gone out with Connie, Eren, and Jean to do some stupid thing, supposedly, and came back all sweaty. Bertholdt was openly staring then. Why does he look so...ridiculously hot when he's sweaty? Who even looks good when they're perspired? 

“A picture will last longer”, Reiner claims suddenly, looking at Bertholdt's flushed face with a teeth-revealing smirk. Bertholdt all but jumped, dropping his book, and snapped his eyes from Reiner's abs to his amused honey colored eyes. Bertholdt broke into a sweat instantly and sputtered, until Reiner laughed and waved him off. 

“I'm kidding, sheesh”, Reiner says as he snatches his fresh shirt off his bed to pull it on. Bertholdt's heart was hammering, and he felt restless. He ended up with his feet on the bed, with his knees drawn up. He was hiding behind them, with his arms around his shins. Reiner was looking over at him, and noticed.

He walks over and simply ruffles Bertholdt's short, dark hair. Bertholdt shakily raises his gaze to Reiner's. Reiner is smiling down at him, “Don't get so wound up all the time, Bertl, I'm only teasing you.” He says this in a soft voice, and that only makes Bertholdt's heart beat at a faster rate. Reiner's hand rests over his head for a mere moment longer than acceptable, before he returned to his bed and essentially, his laptop. 

Shocked, Bertholdt stares at him as he grasps at his chest, over his heart, and wonders what the hell that was. Either way, that's when he knew maybe it may just not be sexual attraction anymore. And that, was very very bad. 

\----------

Besides lazing around in the lounge room, Bertholdt and Reiner hadn't done anything together besides that and just staying in their dorm. Bertholdt had been insistent on leaving Reiner alone following the Christa incident, but even he couldn't resist it any longer. He missed sharing coffee with him.

As soon as Mr. Bossard closed the lecture, Bertholdt instantly pulled his phone out and opened Reiner's contact. Marco was still gathering his things to his side as Bertholdt typed out a quick text. As the students file out, Bertholdt sends the text.

“Texting Reiner?” he hears spoken to his side, and he looks over to see Marco watching him with a smile. Bertholdt lowers his hands with his phone into his lap, and then gives a slight nod. Marco's smile extends a little, revealing some of his teeth. The smile stretches some of the scars on the effected side of his face. “See you later, then, Bertholdt”, he says with excitement in his tone, which is peculiar to Bertholdt. Bertholdt says quietly in return, “Bye, Marco.” And then Marco leaves with his books supported in his arm. 

“ _yeah! meet you there!!_ ”, is the text he gets in response to his offer. It makes Bertholdt smile brightly. He hurries to gather his things following that. But, Reiner wouldn't make it before him, based on the distances from each of their classes to the Starbucks, so Bertholdt can take his time. Despite this, he still has quick feet as he begins towards the Starbucks though the rain. He pulls up the hood to his coat and fixes his scarf around his neck, keeping his books hooked in his arm. 

He's relieved when he sees the bright lights in the store through the darkness of the day. His converse shoes are soaked and he hates that, but the concern isn't in his thoughts when he notices Reiner already sitting at their small two-seater table by the wide window of the Starbucks. He tries to quell his smile as he walks up to the door. The bell jingles as usual when he enters. Upon approaching the table, drawing his hood back, Bertholdt gives Reiner a smile in greeting. 

“Hey”, Reiner says brightly, and the gestures to the seat as well as the caramel frappuccino positioned before it on the table. “Already got you covered”, Reiner states as Bertholdt takes a squeaky seat across from him. 

“Thanks”, Bertholdt said, rather than the sarcastic reply he had thought of. Reiner looks pleased with the thanks he's given and takes a sip of his PSL. Bertholdt sighs gratefully when he takes a drink of his yummy frappuccino.

“So you really only like it because its sweet?”, Reiner muses out of the blue, and Bertholdt raises his eyes to the blond. He nods and blushes a little bit. He didn't like it when people accused him of having a sweet tooth. He didn't know why, really, but it still bugged him. 

“What other kind of sweet things do you like?”, Reiner asks as he sits back in his seat, looking over at Bertholdt past the lid of his latte as he takes another drink.

_You_. Bertholdt thinks with his eyelids falling slightly, and then realizes how much of a lovesick (it can't be love though! Bertholdt insists upon this) fool he's being. He sits straighter and hums thoughtfully. Its not that hard to come up with his favorites.

“Cake, crepes, and...I suppose just chocolate in general. Not dark, though. Dark is gross”, he replies after a moment, and then gets a craving for cake. They had some in Starbucks, but he didn't want to leave the table. Reiner smirks lightly and nods, but doesn't say anything.

“..What about you?”, Bertholdt asks after a pause of silence, and then takes a drink from his frappuccino. Reiner blinks and raises his brow before he shrugs, and says, “I'm not into sweets.” Bertholdt quirks an eyebrow, “None at all?”

“Well..I can tolerate caramel apples, I guess, since it does include something healthy with it.”

“Let me ask a question.”

“Go ahead.”

“Are you one of those guys that prefer fruits and veggies over any junk food?”

Reiner blinks at him, and then he smirks, laughing lightly, before saying, “Well, I prefer it over sweets, but I'm not obsessive about it, you know. I like pizza and shit. I just don't really find the taste of sweets all too appealing, unlike someone at this table.” Bertholdt gives him an unamused expression and Reiner laughs again before taking a drink from his latte. 

They sit in silence for a long while. Bertholdt wonders why of all things, they were discussing sweets. Whatever. As long as it kept them talking, he supposes. He spins his straw around in his frappuccino.

“So are you dating Christa, then?”, Bertholdt asks out of the blue. The question had been picking at him throughout the month now, actually. He just didn't feel any times were the right time to ask about it. Reiner looks up at him at that, and then frowns. Bertholdt quirks a brow in response.

Reiner plays with the mouth piece of his latte as he shrugs. “No”, he says in a solemn tone, eyes downcast, “She actually..stopped talking to me after what happened. I think she knows what she did was the wrong thing to do.”

Bertholdt actually feels bad for him. Reiner obviously liked her, and being ignored after such a big thing. It may have been Reiner's first time, and...and Bertholdt ruined it! Bertholdt realized that just then, and paled in the face. Maybe its doesn't matter to Reiner, though. Yet, Bertholdt does remember one occurrence, when Reiner came back to the dorm room appearing peculiar..

“Was that the first time?”, he asks quietly, olive green eyes downcast to his drink. Reiner sighs in front of him and then replies a moment later in a stern tone, “No.” Bertholdt feels a tight feeling in his gut but really, it seemed kind of obvious anyways. He hums, and then takes a shaky drink of his frap. 

“That sucks that she stopped talking to you”, Bertholdt says even though he doesn't believe that at all, and then continues, “Maybe in time she'll respond to you once more.” Reiner looks hopeful when Bertholdt raises his gaze to him. Its pretty cute, really, and Bertholdt stares. But the reason behind it makes him kind of jealous. Which is stupid. That reminds him of how foolish he's being, talking to his crush who is obviously in love with another girl, and he feels his mood plummet further. 

“So..you into anyone?” Reiner asks after a moment of silence, gazing at Bertholdt across the small table. Hesitating, Bertholdt worries at his bottom lip before exhaling and mumbling a reply.

“..Yes.”

“Really? Shit, why didn't you tell me?”

“Because I see no reason to.”

Reiner looks appalled and then crosses his arms, leaning forward to eye him. “C'mon now, I wanna know if I know this guy. I'll round him up for ya”, he insists, and then grins at Bertholdt. Bertholdt blushes and his heart leaps to a start. He fiddles with his cup and shrugs.

He doesn't want to lie, so he remains quiet, flickering his gaze to Reiner's expectant expression. Reiner quirks a brow, and then his smirk is replaced with a thoughtful frown. He seems to get it, and just sits back with his hands raised, “Alright, alright, I won't bug you about it.” He looks amused though, and its really nerve-racking for Bertholdt.

“Um”, Bertholdt begins, and sighs, “I think I'm going to go now. I have to get ready for my next class soon.” He looks at Reiner gently as he says, “Thank you for meeting me here.” Reiner stares at him for a moment, before grinning and saying, “Of course! It was nice getting coffee with you again, Bertl.” Bertholdt nods and stands, grabbing his half-full caramel frappuccino. Reiner stands as well. 

They both begin towards the entrance, and once they are outside, Bertholdt looks up. 

“Oh. It stopped raining”, he observes, eyes drawn upwards. Reiner hums and then says beside him, eyes raised to the dark sky as well, “I wonder how many 'how's the weather up there?' jokes have been directed towards you” 

“Too many.”

“Ah. Catch you later, Bertl.”

Lowering his eyes back to his friend, Bertholdt smiles and nods, and then gives a small wave with his free hand as he murmurs, “Bye.” Reiner returns the smile before he turns and walks away. Bertholdt watches him leave with a frown on his lips, the smile no longer apparent. 

This sucks. Why does Bertholdt always have to crush on the straight ones?


	15. Chapter 15

It was just Reiner and Bertholdt in the lounge room today. Bertholdt recently returned from a trip to the gymnasium and frankly, he was exhausted. Their classes were over for the day, so they decided to watch TV in the lounge room. Luckily, no one else was there at the time. They were seated at the large couch. Reiner was lazing back into the cushions, with Bertholdt sitting by his side but with some space between them, of course. They agreed to watch some movie channel. _Aliens_ was playing.

Reiner looked away on the gruesome parts, and Bertholdt teased him about it. Reiner ignored him though, and forced himself to watch the small alien babies burst from the humans' stomachs. It made him cringe. Bertholdt seemed unaffected. 

“Hey, what kinds of movies do you like anyways?”, Reiner grumbles as he watches the characters fire at the aliens with gusto. Bertholdt tiredly looks at the screen, and then glances over at his friend. He hums and returns his attention to the screen across from them. 

“Anything is fine, really, as long as its interesting and developed well.”

Bertholdt actually prefers documentaries over any other genre, but that is incredibly lame. So, based on past experience, he taught himself not to speak of that small truth. He grows tired of being called “boring” all the time. Reiner hums by his side.

“Alright then, what are your favorite movies?”

Bertholdt looks over at him, and keeps his eyes fixed on Reiner's face. He was staring at the screen, so Bertholdt lets himself admire his facial features. The slope of his nose, the curves of his lips. His hair was orderly, with his short blond hair combed forwards. The locks at the hairline were growing a little bit longer, Bertholdt notices. After his pause became too long, those piercing golden eyes averted to him. It made Bertholdt jump. Reiner stares at him in silence for a moment before saying, “Well?”

Bertholdt looks away and rubs at his neck, “Um. I don't really have a favorite. I like Tarantino's movies I suppose..” He can feel Reiner's gaze remain on him. Its kind of unnerving. Flickering his eyes back to Reiner, he realizes that he is in fact still staring at him. Bertholdt stares back until Reiner finally looks back to the screen.

“Yeah. His movies are cool”, Reiner agrees in a blank tone and adjusts on the couch. He brings his legs up to cross them and hooks his elbows back over the couch, hands falling by his sides. Bertholdt gazes at him before the screams of the movie earn his attention once more.

“What about you?” Bertholdt gently asks, dropping his gaze to his lap when it goes to commercials. Reiner is quiet for a moment before answering, “ _Die Hard_ , and _Men In Black_ are pretty awesome.”

“Ah”, Bertholdt says, leaning back into the cushion, giving Reiner a smirk, “Into action movies then?” Reiner looks at him with his brow raised and then grins, “Yeah.” Bertholdt rests his head back onto the cushion and openly stares at his teeth-revealing smile and his bright eyes. Silently, he looks until Reiner furrows his brow at him in return and then asks, “Is there something on my face?”

He reaches a hand up from it's laid back position and rubs at his cheeks. Bertholdt blushes and lamely says, “Y-yeah, let me get it.” Saying there was nothing would be weird and suspicious, so Bertholdt decided to go along with it. Reiner nods and juts his head out towards the other with expectant eyes. Blushing a deeper red, Bertholdt reaches a hand up to shakily draw his fingers over the high bone of Reiner's cheek. It was warm. He gently touches the skin for a mere second before drawing his hand away. 

“It's gone”, Bertholdt murmurs, and Reiner smiles.

“Thanks”, he replies and then settles back into the couch. He doesn't even question what it was. Bertholdt sighs deeply, looks at him a moment longer, and then returns his gaze back to the TV. It was back to the movie. He slightly moves away from Reiner. Bertholdt doesn't want to let it be too obvious. What he just did was really suspicious, no doubt. But then again, Reiner was very oblivious. Thank god.

 

It was another thirty minutes until the movie ended. And honestly, the couch was too plush and comfortable. Coming from the gymnasium after doing vigorous routines left Bertholdt exhausted. Since the lounge room was especially warmer than the other parts of the building, and he was being sucked in by the cushions, Bertholdt fell asleep shortly after touching Reiner on the cheek. He fell asleep leaning back into the thick cushion of the couch, and in his sleep, fell over across the seats. 

Reiner was mildly shocked at first, wondering wildly if he had a heart attack or something, but then realized he was snoring softly, his face lax as he remained crumpled over the seats of the couch. Reiner exhales in relief. Instantly, he stands to approach the shelf of the blankets and pillows that the lounge rooms typically held. Sometimes people crashed in here, after all. The blankets were tightly folded, of course, because they were from the Uni staff and they have to give a good appearance through the way they fold their blankets. Reiner rolls his eyes as he yanks two off, as well as a thick pillow.

Returning to Bertholdt, he places the blankets down and with a gentle hand, lifts Bertholdt's head, before slipping the pillow underneath. He sets his head back down. ' _Please don't be a light sleeper, please don't be a light sleeper_ ', Reiner chants in his head as he straightens out Bertholdt's limbs. He then unfolds a blanket and delicately drapes it over Bertholdt. He does the same with the second one. Bertholdt looks like he's drowning in those blankets, and it makes Reiner grin in amusement. He feels compelled to take a picture. So, he does. He takes out his phone, and opens the camera.

He gets a wide shot of Bertholdt swarmed by the blankets, and then crouches down and takes a quick shot of Bertholdt's sleeping face. His mouth was hanging open. It was actually kind of cute. Reiner could definitely use that to tease him later. Reiner snickers to himself as he stands once more. He goes back to the photo album and swipes through them. He pauses on the one of his face up close. Huh. Reiner was so right. Bertholdt does look much more peaceful and not-so-uptight when he's sleeping. Now that he thinks about it, Bertholdt is pretty dang cute.

Which would be funny to say to him, because no doubt Bertholdt would get annoyed and/or embarrassed. Reiner quietly laughs to himself again as he takes his seat at Bertholdt's feet, and then reaches for the remote to turn off the TV. He doesn't want to disturb Bertholdt's sleep with that garbage. With that thought, Reiner looks over to Bertholdt. His arm was falling off the couch, now. How does he even manage to get in crazy positions in his sleep? 

Reiner looks at him as his thoughts wander. How long has he known Bertholdt for? Obviously since the beginning of the semester, but still. Reiner lifts his hands and counts the months on his fingers. Huh. He didn't know much about the kid, even though they've been...friends? Roommates? For about four months. Wow, time really flies by. Has he really been bunking with Bertholdt for that long? 

Reiner is puzzled over it for a while. He typically grows bored easily, but his thoughts keep him preoccupied for a good twenty minutes. Bertholdt is still snoring softly by his side. When Bertholdt makes a noise in his sleep and his leg flies out to smack Reiner on the arm, it jerks Reiner out of his deep thoughts. He jumps, and then laughs. 

Now, Bertholdt's leg was hooked over the back of the couch. Really? Reiner grins to himself, and then scoots a little bit away. He doesn't want to lose an eye the next time it happens. He rests back into the cushion and sighs. Now that he wasn't thinking about things anymore, he realized he's been here for a while. He doesn't feel like stupidly wasting time just sitting there doing nothing, so instead he takes out his phone. When he opens it, he types in his key code and then realizes its still open to the picture of Bertholdt's face. He stares at it for a moment, before opening his texts. Still no replies from Christa. His mood drops, but really, it isn't any different than usual.

Instead, he begins to send texts to Bertholdt's phone. He knows his phone is back in the room, so he doesn't worry about waking him. 

“ _your snores are almost as obnoxious as mine_ ”

“ _i think you're having a wet dream you keep making these noises. Someone should invent a thing where you could see into someone's dream because man I would love to tease you about it later_ ”

“ _also you're drooling on the couch_ ”

“ _someone's gonna bitch about it later_ ”

“ _ow you just kicked me_ ”

“ _the hell, are you really this active in your sleep? You gonna knock a guy out that way_ ”

“ _i feel bad for the guy thats gonna share a bed with you later_ ”

“ _i mean. Like. Sleep wise_ ”

“ _since thats what these texts are about n all_ ”

“ _omfg im bored im not gonna watch over your sleeping ass anymore. Im out_ ”

With that, Reiner stands and puts his phone away. Looking down at Bertholdt's sprawled out position, he smirks. He wouldn't be that cruel to leave Bertholdt here alone, though. Reiner knows Bertholdt would flip out knowing he could have been violated as he slept. So, Reiner reaches over to nudge Bertholdt on the shoulder a few times.

Bertholdt's eyelids slowly blink open. He raises his tired green eyes to Reiner and speaks groggily, “Reiner?”

Reiner smiles, “Get up, lazy ass. Its been an hour since you fell asleep. I would have let you sleep longer, but I didn't wanna leave you here alone.” Bertholdt blinks blearily, and then processes what he said. As per usual, his cheeks grow pink and Reiner's smile extends. He lifts his hand from where it was resting on Bertholdt's shoulder. Bertholdt wipes at his wet chin with the back of his hand as he sits up. His darkly colored hair is a complete mess. 

“I-I'm sorry”, he says nervously, looking up at Reiner with doe-like eyes. Reiner blinks a few times, and then he laughs awkwardly, before replying quietly, “No problem. Now, c'mon, help me put these blankets away.”

Bertholdt looks down at himself. Indeed, there were blankets. He raises his gaze back to Reiner, “You did this for me?”

Reiner huffs and then laughs again, “Of course I did. Are you going to be stunned over the fact your dear old friend did a simple kind thing, or are you going to help me put these blankets away?” He places his hand on his waist, and eyes the other. Bertholdt gives him a mild glare and pulls the blankets off him to stand up. Reiner smirks and takes one. 

“Thank you”, he says teasingly and Bertholdt is silent as he folds the blanket in his hands. They didn't really have to do this, because it was the staff's job, but whatever. Reiner didn't mind. He's quick with his. Even when its really sloppy and loose, he still returns to the shelf to shove it amongst the other. It really stands out from the neatly folded ones. He returns to grab the pillow. 

Bertholdt follows him back, and they slot the pillow and blanket in place. Wow, Bertholdt's is almost perfect compared to his. Reiner hums and lightly elbows Bertholdt on the arm. “Ow”, Bertholdt mutters as he rubs his arm, “What was that for?” 

“For doing a better job than me.”

“Be more specific.”

Reiner looks at him and rolls his eyes with a smirk, before he turns towards the exit. “Smart ass”, he calls over his shoulder and he hears Bertholdt chuckle quietly as he follows. 

 

All Reiner got in return to his texts was a smack to the shoulder and a very embarrassed Bertholdt. Reiner was very pleased, to say the least, with the response. Bertholdt still doesn't know about the photos, though.

\----------

“Get a room”, Connie calls from the picnic table, towards Jean and Marco who are standing by the swing set. They were sharing a brief kiss, and of course, Connie called them out on it. Jean flipped him off, and continued kissing his boyfriend. Marco was unfazed. 

Sitting at the picnic table alongside Connie and Reiner, Bertholdt gazed over at his two other friends across the grassy area of the nearby playground, who apparently had no problem with public displays of affection. Bertholdt usually was very irritated with those sorts of things (another reason why he hated high school. Stupid horny teenagers making out during passing period in the hallways), but really, he was more jealous than bothered by it. He doesn't want to be rude though, so he looks away from the image. Instead, he looks over at Reiner who sat beside him. Connie, despite his words, was watching the lovey-dovey pair with a grimace.

“Hey, leave 'em be, Connie. Just look away if you don't like it”, Reiner says loudly, sounding mildly annoyed based on his tone. Bertholdt can sense the hint of irritation, but Connie is simply unaware. He shrugs and turns back to Reiner and Bertholdt. Armin and Eren had been gone for about ten minutes now. They went to the local gas station to get some snacks. 

Even if it was really chilly, the group of college boys decided it would be more entertaining to go to the park beside the campus, rather than sit around and do nothing. It was the weekend and Bertholdt just finished with his exams, and didn't mind spending some time out with the group. They did have finals in a few weeks, though, so he had to consider studying eventually. Marco could help him with that. 

Thinking of that, it makes him glance back to the pair. They were now just talking, but Jean had an arm around Marco. Marco was looking at Jean with a bright face, and seemed to be talking excitedly. Bertholdt gazes at them for a moment, until he feels a few nudges to his shoulder. He looks over to see Reiner giving him a smirk.

“I never would have thought you were into Jean. You keep watching them like you wanna snatch him from Marco”, Reiner says under his breath, so Connie couldn't tease Bertholdt along with him. Bertholdt gives him a glare, not even embarrassed. “Really, Reiner? I don't even know the guy's last name”, he mutters in reply, “Not to mention, I wouldn't want to do that to Marco.”

Reiner's smirk softens and he nudges him with his shoulder once again, “I'm just kidding.”

Bertholdt isn't amused and shows so through his expression. “What a tasteful sense of humor”, he quietly retorts. Reiner gives a breathy laugh.

“Oh my God, how long are they gonna taaake. I want my Pringles nooow.”, Connie moans across from them, disrupting their little exchange. Raising their gazes to him, Connie is sprawled out on his side with obvious impatience. Bertholdt never really was so fond of Connie, and he wonders how Reiner can tolerate him. Reiner laughs in response to his complaint. 

“Patience, dude”, Reiner says and Connie gives him a scowl.

“They're back”, Bertholdt states, amused they came just at the right time. He was looking past the playground set to see the pair walking in, through the opening of the fence. Connie leaps up and instantly runs to them. Bertholdt is mildly startled, but Reiner only chuckles, knowing that would happen. Connie shouts something at them and they stop. As soon as he reaches them, Connie begins to dig through the bags.

“Aw man, I told you I wanted ranch flavored, not fuckin' cheddar!”, Connie yells, and Armin gives him an unamused look. Eren says something, and then Connie pauses, laughs nervously, before gently setting the Pringles back into the bag. He withdraws the correct tube this time. Eren rolls his eyes before he walks past him, and approaches Reiner and Bertholdt at the picnic table.

More sets of footsteps begin on the grass. Looking over, Bertholdt sees Marco and Jean approaching as well. 

Actually, its really cramped at the table with all seven of them. Reiner, Bertholdt, and Marco are squished on one side, with Jean, Eren, Armin, and Connie across from them. Jean isn't pleased to sit next to Eren, but Marco distracts him well enough. The requested snacks are dispersed. Armin hands Bertholdt his water and Moon Pie. Reiner has a Dr. Pepper and Hot Fudge Sundae Poptarts. 

“Are we actually having a meal with various gas station junk food”, Eren says as noises of wrappers overlap. Connie snorts as he opens his Pringles.

“Hell fuckin' yeah we are”, he says before shoving a stack of Pringles into his mouth. Bertholdt hears Reiner chuckle quietly by his side. Bertholdt opens his Moon Pie as he glances at Reiner past his scarf that was secured around his neck and lower face. Reiner is breaking his Poptarts into pieces. On Bertholdt's other side, Marco remains silent as he attempts to open his chips, single-handed. 

Bertholdt watches through his bangs as Jean reaches over and offers a hand. Marco makes a small noise, but doesn't say anything. Jean makes a quiet grunt in return and Bertholdt wonders if they know what they're saying just based on one little sound. 

“Its cold as hell out here”, Connie snaps once he takes a break from his Pringles, and hooks his hands under his arms.

“Hell, technically, isn't very cold”, Armin says beside him, and Connie scoffs, brushing it off. He still shivers and makes annoying brrrr noises anyways. Bertholdt is mildly amused by the whole scenario. He just doesn't know how to eat this Moon Pie without it becoming a huge mess.

He attempts to break off a piece, but it crumbles into little pieces instead. Huffing behind his scarf, he tries again. More little bits. He pulls down his scarf and raises it to take a bite. Some crumbs fall onto his coat and scarf. Annoyed, he exhales in a sigh and brushes it off.

“Having difficulty?” Reiner mutters to his side as Connie has a heated debate with Armin, and while Jean begins to nudge Eren farther away with an elbow. Bertholdt averts his gaze to Reiner as Eren shouts at Jean and Jean flicks one of his mini Oreos at him.

“Uh, kind of”, Bertholdt says with nervous laughter, and hands it over to Reiner. Reiner takes it as Bertholdt quietly murmurs, “You try taking a bite without any crumbs falling on you, its impossible.” Reiner smirks, never turning down a challenge, and raises it to take a big bite out of it. Bertholdt gives him a light glare when Reiner hands it back, and Reiner gives him a bigger grin with his mouth full. 

“Its not impossible”, Reiner says around a mouth full of marshmallow and then swallows it down. Bertholdt points to some on his sleeve, “No, there's some right there, idiot.” Reiner looks down past the collar of his coat and then laughs loudly. Its pretty much muted out by the shouting between Jean and Eren. Marco was even raising his voice too, no doubt trying to calm the other two down. And of course, Connie was egging them on. Armin was not even acknowledging it.

Reiner's laughter dies down to chuckles, and Bertholdt smiles behind his scarf. Reiner pats him on the back, “Alright, fine. You win. It is impossible.” Bertholdt feels his face warm. Reiner drops his hand and then returns to eating his Poptarts. Bertholdt looks at him for a moment, before averting his gaze down to his Moon Pie with the big bite out of it.

With a smile curling on his lips, he raises it to his lips and takes small bites. 

 

They ended up leaving sooner than later because Jean nudged Eren's side again, and Eren sprang up and punched Jean in the eye. Then they rolled around on the grass, shouting and throwing punches like morons, until Reiner yanked Jean off of him. 

Bertholdt thought it was an evening well-spent.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for drinking, intoxication n stuff. idk if some people dont like that or not? Just to be safe I suppose. I would also like to say, I have never been drunk before, so if its totally inaccurate, just....shh...

It seemed that due to Christa's neglect of Reiner, Reiner averted his attention to his roommate. More often, they meet at Starbucks between breaks. They honestly don't have to ask beforehand, its an unspoken agreement to meet there. Whenever Reiner beats Bertholdt, he orders him a caramel frappuccino (with extra caramel), and if Bertholdt gets there before the other, he makes sure to get a pumpkin spice latte. 

And on one weekend, Bertholdt nearly let Reiner come along when he was planning on going to the gymnasium. At the last moment though, his embarrassment and shyness won and he told Reiner he couldn't come after all. Reiner was disappointed, but didn't complain. Bertholdt knows eventually Reiner will want to see, but he isn't sure he's looking forward to that at all. In fact, he's kind of self-conscious about doing gymnastics in front of people he knew. Annie watched him _once_ , but when she would not shut up about it, Bertholdt swore to never let her come along ever again. 

Yet, the finals were around the corner, so they didn't have as much time to screw around with their friends. Reiner was irritated more than Bertholdt about that fact, but he still focused on his studying. Bertholdt spent his time in the library with Marco studying. If he tried reviewing with Reiner, Reiner always distracted him with aimless conversation. Marco was a perfect study buddy.

As the day of the finals came closer, Bertholdt endlessly stressed if he studied enough or if he missed anything. As usual, he can't sleep the night before, and stares over at the lump of Reiner's sleeping body for hours, mind whirring with worries, until he literally cannot hold his eyelids open anymore. 

Needless to say, he felt confident after taking them. 

But a few hours after his finals, and things have calmed down, Bertholdt remembers Christmas is coming up, and frets over which gifts to get and if he has enough money and who should he get presents for. Marco, Annie, and Reiner were obviously at the top of the list. 

He had a week to decide, at least. 

 

The lounge room is haphazardly designed with Christmas themed decorations. Rudolph and Santa were pinned to the wall above the TV, and the blankets on the shelf were now of snow flakes and presents and Santa hat designs. Ropes of leaves and poinsettias were hung around the room. The lobby was decorated similarly. 

It was just Bertholdt, Reiner, Eren, Armin, and Connie in the lounge room, two days after the finals. Marco and Jean were doing their own thing. Sitting at one of the tables, Bertholdt was engrossed in a book he checked out from the library. Eren and Armin were talking on the couch, while Reiner and Connie loudly battled a game out through table tennis. The shouts and laughter coming from the pair would originally be annoying to Bertholdt when he's reading, but its actually kind of soothing, strangely. He smiles to himself, listening to Reiner mock Connie for missing the table entirely. 

Twenty minutes pass of the TV droning on with no one paying attention, and of Reiner and Connie hitting a ball back and forth, until someone enters the lounge room. Looking up, Bertholdt sees Jean walk in with his hands in his jean's pockets. 

“Hey”, Jean calls, earning all of their gazes. Connie and Reiner stop hitting the table tennis ball back and forth to look over at him. The ball taps on the ground as it bounces away. 

“Yo!”, Connie shouts back. Eren goes back to talking to Armin, but Jean doesn't show any signs of caring. 

“So I'm throwing a party at my place since the finals are fuckin' over now. Yes, there will be alcohol, and no, my parents won't be there. I'm assuming you guys are coming, and you know my address?” Jean says loudly, leveling everyone with a determined, expectant expression. Bertholdt looks back down at his book.

Connie says some unneeded thing and Reiner confirms that of course they know his address, they've only gone to his house a million times before. Jean makes a noise of satisfaction. Then he pauses.

“Bert, you can tag along too, I don't care”, is spoken then, and it earns Bertholdt's gaze once more. He's surprised Jean addressed him directly. Jean is looking at him blankly, and then turns to leave. But he pauses to shout, “Except you, Jaeger!” 

“I wasn't planning to come, you dumbass!”, Eren plainly states in a raised voice, before he goes back to discussing whatever he was discussing with Armin. Jean just walks out, leaving the room as if he was never there. Bertholdt was still stunned over the fact Jean talked to him. That's kind of weird, because the only time they exchanged words was when they introduced themselves to each other. They were just there for different people, not for each other. Bertholdt appreciates it.

Although, he doesn't know how he feels about this party he speaks of. He doesn't want it to turn out like last time. He doesn't want Reiner to ditch him again. It made him feel like such a loser. Glancing over his shoulder, Bertholdt looks over to where Reiner stands. He was mildly surprised to notice Reiner staring at him too. As soon as Bertholdt met eyes with him though, Reiner turned back to Connie across the table, and then challenged him again, loudly. Bertholdt watched him silently.

Would it be different now that Christa wasn't in the picture?

Bertholdt probably wasn't going to go anyways. He turns back to his book and brushes the concern aside.

\----------

Reiner ended up convincing him to go. Actually saying he wanted Bertholdt to come with him easily urged him to tag along. Bertholdt also invited Annie, just for the hell of it, and she simply said no and that was that. Well, it didn't bother him. Its just he hasn't really seen her in a while. She must think he's ignoring her. He doesn't mean to, Reiner just distracts him. A lot.

He still feels anxious though, when Reiner pulls up into the driveway of Jean's humongous house. So he was rich, then. At least, his parents were. It was actually really gaudy, and it seemed like it was meant to show off. Bertholdt wonders what its like inside. As they pace up to the front door, they can hear music being played past the entrance. This reminds Bertholdt of the first time he went to a party with Reiner, and it brings back cringe-worthy memories. He recalls Ymir. That was a few months ago, actually. Remembering her scary attitude makes him shudder.

But he's distracted well enough when they enter the house. The entrance instantly breaks out into a large lobby-like area. There was a stereo system between two large doors, and it was pumping out loud music that sounded like pop. They came a little earlier than before, so there aren't groups of people yet. There were a few small groups in the lobby, but there is probably more spread out. 

“Just wait like, thirty minutes and it'll be packed. Jean usually throws crazy parties”, Reiner says, excitement in his voice. Bertholdt doesn't like the sound of that. But, he wasn't going to leave just yet. 

They turn to the wide staircase and begin up it. Reiner seems to know where to go. As soon as they are at the top, Reiner begins down the hallway to their right. Bertholdt nervously follows, feeling slightly anxious in such a foreign, large place as this. The paintings lining the wall of the hallway earn his attention as they pace past. They come across other doors occasionally, but Reiner passes those as well. They stop at a door at the end.

Reiner lifts a hand to knock on the door. 

“Yeah”, a voice calls. Its Jean. Reiner pushes open the door and they glance in to see Jean across the room, leaning out of a window. Bertholdt glances around at what supposedly was Jean's bedroom. There were some posters that he didn't recognize, and there was an electrical guitar propped up against a wall with a small amplifier beside it. Clothes were on the floor, and his bed was haphazard as well. 

“Hey Jean”, Reiner says, and it earns Jean's gaze when he looks back into the room. Jean looks between the two. “You two came together. How shocking”, he muses with a smirk spreading over his lips, and Bertholdt looks over at Reiner with a furrowed brow. Reiner laughs and then asks, “Why are you up here, staring out a window, instead of down there with your guests?” Jean rolls his eyes and averts his eyes back out past the window.

“I don't need to be a supervisor, Reiner. The drinks are in the kitchen. I'll come down eventually”, Jean claims in a raised voice, and then Reiner waves him off before he turns and leaves. Conflicted, Bertholdt remains in the room for a moment, staring at Jean, before he turns and follows. He shuts the door behind him and catches up to Reiner. 

“He's always trying to act cool”, Reiner laughs as they approach the staircase together. Bertholdt remains thoughtfully silent and begins to descend the staircase. Looking over at the entrance, he notices a lot more people coming in.

“Looks like they came earlier than I expected”, Reiner muses. Bertholdt hangs behind when Reiner approaches the group. He watches from the back as Reiner calls someone out. Then Bertholdt hears Connie's obnoxious voice over the loud conversing of everyone. He isn't pleased to hear it. Connie breaks out past the swarm and his hand is clutching around someone's wrist. He pulls a girl along with him. If Bertholdt isn't mistaken, her name was Sasha. She was at the other party, too. 

They talk to Reiner with excitement and Reiner makes an appalled expression. They laugh at it before running off, presumably to the kitchen where the alcohol was. Reiner is greeted by a few more people passing through as he stands there for a moment, and he smiles and pats them on the back, before he turns and approaches Bertholdt. Bertholdt gives him a light smile, unsure of what to say.

Reiner nods at him and then places a hand on his arm, “Let's go see what drinks Jean has to offer.” Bertholdt nods, but isn't entirely interested. He has no choice but to tag along though, when Reiner slips his way past the growing group of attendees. 

In the kitchen, its not as swarmed, but there are more people than Bertholdt would prefer to be around in such a confined space. It was a lot more small due to the bodies moving about. Reiner pushes past people to get to the circle of alcohol bottles on the large island counter. Bertholdt wonders if the placement of alcohol is typically on the island counter. It reminds him of the previous party. It must be for better access.

Reiner stands between two other people as he looks through it all. Bertholdt awkwardly stands to the side, rubbing at his arm. Weren't parties supposed to be fun? Or was it just starting? Conversation remained loud throughout the main area. More and more people were filing in. How many people did Jean invite? Or was it open invitations to anyone, _from_ anyone? Bertholdt was anxiously worrying about it when he felt a hand grab his bicep. He yelped quietly, but then realized it was Reiner tugging him forward to join the circle of people around the selection.

“Hey, hey, are you willing to try something this time? It doesn't have to be strong or anything. I think you would like some wine, huh? Jean's parents always are picky with their wine”, Reiner babbles with a raised voice, over the boisterousness of others, and Bertholdt looks down at him with unease. The only alcohol he's ever tolerated in the least was wine. Wine is okay. Bertholdt thinks he will need a drink if he were to be around this crowd for a few more hours. 

“Yeah, wine is fine”, Bertholdt replies over the noise, and Reiner gives him a bright grin. He lets his arm go to reach over and pluck one of the bottles out of the mix. The music mingles with the conversation of the people about as Reiner shoves the bottle into his hands. Bertholdt squeaks in surprise and clutches it to his chest. Reiner beckons for him to step out of the mob of people. Bertholdt wiggles past the many shoulders and once its not so crowded, he relaxes with a sigh. Turning around, he notices Reiner is gone.

He blinks and wildly looks around. What the hell? Did the crowd swallow him? It wasn't _that_ cramped in there! Bertholdt breaks into a nervous sweat. But as soon as his thoughts begin to go into a panic, he sees Reiner come out of the group of people. He's holding two red cups. 

“Here”, Reiner says when he approaches, holding out one of them. Looking over, Bertholdt realizes Reiner prepared his own drink too. Bertholdt takes the offered cup. Reiner gestures to the wine bottle as he takes a sip out of his cup. Bertholdt worries at his lip. After a pause, Reiner realizes his discomfort.

“Okay, okay. Let's go find some other quiet place, huh?” Reiner says and then places a hand on Bertholdt's back, between his shoulder blades, and begins to push him along towards the lobby. Its even more packed in there, but Bertholdt doesn't worry about it. Isn't Reiner being a bit touchy today? He considers it for a moment, but then realizes they're going into a swarm of people again, and then clutches the wine bottle closer to himself to protect it. 

Reiner pulls him along to a hallway, that was across from the kitchen entrance. The voices of the people grows louder. This place is going to be full soon, and Bertholdt wasn't looking forward to it. Does Jean even worry over it? 

They walk down the hallway, passing a few people, and then enter through a open door to a large room. It was a living room, much like the one at Ymir's place. It had a large flat screen TV on the wall, with a wide leather couch across from it. Glancing around, Bertholdt takes notice of the people sitting about with red cups like their own. There were two desks with computers on them. How can Jean even trust these people not to steal? Those computers were occupied by small clusters of people. 

The couch was empty, thankfully. Reiner drops his hand from his back and walks up to it. He takes a heavy seat with a sigh, and sinks back into the cushion. “Here we are”, he says, and Bertholdt claims a seat beside him, but more carefully and quietly. Reiner drinks from his cup as Bertholdt leans forward to set his red cup on the coffee table. He was careful to pour the wine. The colored liquid makes weird gurgling noises as it pours out. Reiner is quiet when Bertholdt sets the bottle down and grabs his cup. Sitting back into the couch, Bertholdt sighs, and looks up at the TV that was on a sports channel. The people on the computers were loud with laughter and conversation. 

Bertholdt worries if he's keeping Reiner from enjoying the party, and takes polite sips of his wine. Its actually really good, compared to other wine he's had. He closes his eyes as he savors the taste on his tongue. He detects a hint of sweetness, too.

“Is it good?” he hears spoken to his side. Looking over at Reiner, he sees a smile on the blond's lips. He gives a small nod and then raises the cup to him, offering. Reiner grins and takes it, fingers momentarily over Bertholdt's as he accepts it. Bertholdt blushes and pulls his hand away. He thinks that's a really cliché thing to get flustered about, but Reiner's fingers were really warm just then.

Reiner takes a drink, and hums around the rim of the cup. His eyes close. Bertholdt's lips curl into a smile. Reiner lowers the cup and licks his lips, opening his eyes to look at Bertholdt. “What'd I say? They always have the best shit”, Reiner says smugly as he hands it back to his taller friend. Bertholdt laughs lightly and shakes his head. 

“And what do you have?” Bertholdt asks in return and looks over at him. Reiner hums and takes a sip of his drink before saying, “Vodka with orange juice.” Bertholdt raises a brow and Reiner hands it to him. Bertholdt has never tried vodka, and he's not inclined to. He glances in and notices that its only a quarter full. He knows vodka is one of the more stronger drinks, so its understandable.

“Do you usually get that?” Bertholdt wonders as he hands it back to him. Reiner nods, before saying, “You're not going to try it?”

“Nah”, Bertholdt says and returns to his wine gratefully. He isn't that curious. Reiner looks a little disappointed, but he shrugs, and then takes another small drink. They sit in silence for a long moment, idly staring at the TV screen, before Reiner looks at him again. Bertholdt averts his gaze to him as well.

“So how is it going with the guy you're into?” Reiner asks out of the blue, and Bertholdt nearly sputters on his wine, having been mid-drink. Bertholdt wipes his lips with his tongue and furrows his brow at the other.

“Why?” Bertholdt questions, situating himself better on the couch, with discomfort. He's blushing again, and looks down at his lap where he held his cup. Reiner exhales by his side and then muses, “Just curious.”

“I'm curious to why you're so curious”, Bertholdt retorts almost instantly, raising his eyes to Reiner's. Reiner stares into his eyes sternly, and Bertholdt fights to keep his gaze on his. After a pause, Reiner laughs lightly, and then shrugs, leaning back into the cushion, and takes a drink of his vodka. He raises a hand to obnoxiously ruffle Bertholdt's hair.

Bertholdt makes a noise of complaint and pushes his hand away. He glares at Reiner as he smooths his hair down back into place. Reiner is watching him with warm eyes and a loose grin. “Hey, I'm allowed to be interested in my best friend's romantic overtures, yeah?” Reiner replies, giving Bertholdt a smirk.

Rolling his eyes, Bertholdt tries to play it off, the fact that Reiner considers him a best friend. It makes him really happy, but he doesn't want it to show. He gives a light shrug.

“Nothing is really new. Its going fine”, Bertholdt mumbles, looking over at Reiner's face with soft eyes. Reiner's smirk softens and he nods. 

“Good, that's good”, Reiner muses quietly, gazing over at the taller boy with a tight smile. The tumult caused by the many people gathering in the room and in the hallway doesn't concern Bertholdt. Instead, he drowns that out and focuses on Reiner. Reiner looks really attractive with his stupid smile and gentle eyes and flushed face. Bertholdt looks away with his cheeks growing warm, and takes a shaky drink of his wine. Then he realizes its empty. Looking in, its confirmed.

So he leans over towards the coffee table and refills it three quarters full. 

Maybe he shouldn't, but he does. He already feels a little fuzzy. This is precisely why he doesn't drink. He doesn't hold it well. Sighing, he sits back into the couch and glances over at Reiner. He opens his mouth to say something, but a much louder voice beats him to it.

“Yo, Reiner!”, is shouted from behind them. 

They simultaneously glance over the back of the couch to see none other than Ymir standing there, with her hands on her waist. She was wearing skinny jeans and a loose blouse that had a pastel colored tie dye design. The sleeves drooped on her arms and looked really puffy. Bertholdt thought it actually looked good on her.

She was smirking at the two. 

“Well, if it isn't little ol' Bertholdt from before? And with Reiner? How shocking!”

Reiner looks unamused. 

“Why are you here, Ymir?” Reiner demands and she looks very pleased with that question. “I was invited by Sasha, thank you very much”, Ymir claims, and then she looks over her shoulder. She silently looks for someone for a moment, and Bertholdt thinks this is rather odd. 

“Hey! Where's my girl?” She shouts over the ruckus, and then a second later, a short, petite blonde girl makes her way past the small crowd of people. 

“Ymir, don't run off like that, please, I can't keep up”, the blonde girl says, and then she glances over to where Ymir was facing. Her concerned expression goes to that of discomfort, and her face pales. Bertholdt realizes that must be Christa, then. He watches quietly, and then glances over to Reiner. Reiner has a blank face on, obviously trying to play whatever this was off.

“Hey, hey, so me and Christa are back together, y'know?”, Ymir claims loudly, hooking an arm around her girlfriend's small shoulders. Ymir looks extremely smug with her big grin and her eyes are zeroed onto Reiner. Bertholdt can see how Reiner's jaw sets. 

“Y-Ymir, stop it”, Christa murmurs, pressing onto Ymir's side, but Ymir is loudly saying something else.

“So fuck off!”, Ymir finishes, and then leans over to kiss Christa sweetly on the head. Christa is blushing deeply now. Then Ymir pulls Christa away through the crowd, after giving Reiner a satisfied smirk. Bertholdt awkwardly sits there, remaining silent as he peeks over at Reiner. Reiner turns back to the TV, scoffs, and then downs the rest of his vodka. Worriedly, Bertholdt watches as Reiner pushes himself up to stand.

“I'm getting more. Stay here”, Reiner states, before he walks around the couch and strides into the crowded hallway. Bertholdt watches after him and then turns back to the TV with a sigh. He sinks into the couch. Sasha must have invited Ymir, knowing she would bring Christa. She probably thought Reiner would appreciate it. Well, that was really uncomfortable. Bertholdt kind of felt bad for Reiner. He deserved it though. He did sleep with Ymir's girlfriend after all.

Bertholdt sits there for a few long minutes, miserably staring down into his wine, until he hears and feels someone take a heavy seat beside him. Lifting his eyes, he disregards his deep thinking and sees Reiner sitting beside him with his arm resting over the back of the couch, behind Bertholdt. He was drinking out of the cup again. He took three gulps, until Bertholdt pressed a hand onto Reiner's arm that was supporting the cup. Reiner lowers his arm and looks over at him.

“Slow down”, Bertholdt sternly says, staring into Reiner's eyes. Reiner's eyes were shiny and wet. Bertholdt wasn't sure if it was due to the alcohol or not. Reiner nods silently, and sighs, resting his hand with the cup in his lap. 

“Ymir is scary”, Bertholdt mumbles before taking a drink of his wine. That makes Reiner laugh lightly and nod. “That she is”, he muses, and then he claps his hand on the back of the couch where it rested, and stood once more.

“C'mon, let's go walk around”, Reiner says and faces Bertholdt, looking down at him with a grin. He offers a hand, and Bertholdt doesn't really need the help, but he takes it anyways. Reiner hoists him up and then they exit the room. 

 

They wandered throughout the house, occasionally coming across people, and glanced into every room. Reiner told Bertholdt he'd been here a couple of times before, so he knows where to go if they got lost. It seemed like he was gloating about it, but Bertholdt said it wasn't something to be smug about. Reiner looked defeated. It made Bertholdt laugh. 

 

In the end, they would up on the grand staircase in the lobby, sitting (more like splaying) out on the stairs along with Sasha, Connie, Ymir, and Christa. There were others sitting or standing around in groups, but the conversing wasn't as loud as it had been. Most people had dispersed throughout the house. Its been three hours since Reiner and Bertholdt had come to the mansion, and Bertholdt was wasted. He had the majority of that wine bottle, and he did not hold it well.

“Oh my god Bertholdt you're so sweatyyyy”, Sasha says as her fingers press annoyingly into his cheek. He mutters something that is unintelligible due to the fact his lips are smushed together by Sasha's cheek pressing. He doesn't take kindly to being called sweaty. He weakly swats at her hand and she giggles. Connie is pulling at her messy ponytail until she diverts her attention back to him. Bertholdt is glad that Connie claimed it once more.

Bertholdt leans heavily against Reiner's shoulder as he attempts to keep his eyelids open. They came here at nine, so it must be late now. The intoxication isn't helping with his consciousness.

Reiner chuckles when Bertholdt slips against his shoulder and falls down onto his lap. Reiner doesn't mind. He's not as embarrassingly drunk as Bertholdt. He's had practice with handling his alcohol. He stopped after that second cup of vodka. Its not like those cups held much of the alcohol anyways. He could easily push Bertholdt off, but he doesn't want to disturb him. Bertholdt's eyelids are fluttering as he gazes up at Reiner. His arm is falling down the steps of the stairs.

“I'm drunk”, he says and it makes Reiner chuckle again. 

“You are.”

Reiner notices how Bertholdt's bangs are sticking to his forehead with sweat. He draws up a hand and slides it over his forehead, pushing back the wet locks. Bertholdt hums and his eyelids stop fluttering when he closes his eyes. Reiner lets his hand rest on his forehead for a moment.

“Stop fondling him Reiner, he's wasted, don't take advantage of that”, Ymir says, pausing from kissing Christa to look over at the pair. Reiner had ignored the other two the entire time they were there. Drunk Bertholdt was distracting enough anyways. It was pretty amusing to watch him. Christa would act awkward around him, but Reiner had gotten the message a while ago. Christa didn't want to be involved with him anymore, so he wasn't going to bother. 

“You consider forehead touching fondling? You must be so thrilling in bed”, Reiner lamely retorts, not even raising his eyes from Bertholdt. Bertholdt gave a weak grin and opened his eyes. He craned his head back against Reiner's thigh to look at Christa and Ymir who sat by Reiner, a step higher. Ymir merely scoffs, and nudges Reiner with her foot.

“I bet you'd want to know”, she sneers and he doesn't even retort to that. Reiner raises his hand from Bertholdt's forehead. Bertholdt makes a pouty face up at him, and it makes Reiner grin with amusement. With his mind all fuzzy, Reiner has no problem thinking Bertholdt is a rather adorable drunk. Reiner hums at the thought, and then after a pause, he lifts his hip a little to reach in his pocket to grab his phone. 

Connie and Sasha are laughing loudly by his other side, and it hurts his head. Then they go back to joking as he unlocks his phone. Before he could do anything though, its suddenly yanked out of his hands.

“Oooh, let's see what kind of things Reiner is hiding in his phone!”, Ymir calls with excitement, and it makes Christa giggle drunkenly. Reiner turns to glare at her, but is careful not to disturb Bertholdt in his lap. He reaches for it but she raises it higher as she tsks at him. Ymir grins widely as she goes to the photos.

“I'm serious Ymir, give it back”, Reiner growls, just as Ymir makes a mocking gasp and then laughs like a hyena. 

“Oh my _God_ , is that Bertholdt?” Ymir howls with laughter, and shows Christa what has to be those pictures of Bertholdt sleeping. Reiner feels his blood run cold, and growls in his throat.

“Nnn?” Bertholdt makes a noise from Reiner's lap, and weakly raises himself to look over Reiner's shoulder. Blushing, Reiner swipes for his phone desperately as Ymir continues to shriek with annoying laughter. She falls back onto the stairs and _laughs_ as she stares up at Bertholdt's sleeping face. 

“You have pictures of Bertholdt sleeping! Are you serious?!”

“Shut up, Ymir!”, Reiner shouts angrily and jumps to her, now that Bertholdt wasn't resting on him anymore. He yanks his phone from her grasp, face a deep red, and instantly closes his phone. Ymir is still laughing obnoxiously, and Christa can't help but laugh along, even if she doesn't find it extremely amusing like her girlfriend. Ymir has tears in her eyes when she opens them to look at Reiner.

“You're as red as a tomato!”, she yells, and goes back into a fit of laughter, clutching her stomach. Reiner feels like smacking her, but he doesn't hit girls, so instead he huffs and takes his seat again, hiding his face from Bertholdt.

“...Huh?” Bertholdt dumbly slurs, and then his long fingers hook around Reiner's bicep.

“Pictures? Of me?” Bertholdt wonders and then giggles, before he fell back onto Reiner's lap heavily. His hand slides down from his bicep and ends up stuck in the junction of his elbow, seeing as Reiner's arm was raised. Reiner notices this, and lowers his arm so Bertholdt's hand drops. Looking down at him, Reiner cocks a brow. He's _really_ drunk then, if he isn't concerned over it. 

“Ymir...don't die from laughter okay?” Christa says, leaning over to lay with Ymir on the stairs. She curls a small arm around Ymir, and Ymir's hyena laughing dies. 

Reiner sighs to himself, and rubs at his forehead with a hand. He blinked a few times, feeling light-headed. But he wasn't stupidly drunk like the others. He wants to leave. Bertholdt wouldn't care, because he is _so_ pissed right now. He's nuzzling into Reiner's abdomen and Reiner doesn't really acknowledge it. He's considering whether he should drive home or not. Probably not. He doesn't want to risk it. He's still somewhat in the right state of mind but he is a little fuzzy, nonetheless.

Just then, he hears footsteps above them. Glancing back, he sees none other than Marco pacing down with his hand on the railing. He's smiling softly, watching the group joke and talk with each other. Well, at least the others were. Reiner was unamused. 

“Anyone need a ride home?” He asks over the voices, glancing throughout the lobby at all the people loitering about. Reiner swears Marco is an angel. Angelic music drifts through his thoughts as he raises a hand and calls, “Yeah.” Marco gives him a bright smile.

“We have to take my car I'm afraid, it has automatic transmission for my sake.”

“That's fine.”

 

After Marco confirmed he has time to drive them back to Uni, Reiner hooked one of his arms under Bertholdt's torso, and then hoisted him up. Complaints came from the taller boy as Reiner helped him up to stand. Bertholdt was like a furnace against his side. Reiner grunts quietly as he stands with Bertholdt.

“Let me lay down”, Bertholdt moans against Reiner's head as Reiner pulls him to the entrance, stepping over and around people. Bertholdt's chin was digging uncomfortably against his head, but Reiner can't do anything about it. Bertholdt puts some effort into walking, and it kind of helps. 

Marco follows after them, once he grabbed his coat and keys, and politely shuts the entrance after them. Once they make it to Marco's car, Reiner is about fed up with Bertholdt. Bertholdt won't stop babbling and he keeps nuzzling into Reiner's hair. Its getting on his nerves. But eventually, Bertholdt is draped over the backseat of Marco's car, after Marco unlocked it, and shuts up when he's able to rest again. Reiner takes a seat in the passenger side with a heaved sigh. 

“Buckle your seat belts, I don't want there to be a higher chance of me killing you guys”, Marco muses as he gets in and secures his own seat belt. Reiner looks over at him with a cocked brow, “If there's any chance, I'm getting out and taking Bertholdt with me.” Marco laughs lightly, and gives Reiner a smile as he starts the car.

“I'm just joshing you”, Marco says and then begins to back out.

Reiner wonders who even says 'joshing' at this age, but whatever. He doubts Bertholdt can buckle himself, and he isn't going to go through the effort of helping him with it. He just clicks his own into place and then gives a thanks to Marco. Marco gives him another sweet smile before he turns out of Jean's driveway.

 

They arrive at the dorm parking lot a little later than Reiner would have liked, but he doesn't mind. It was a better thing that Marco was careful, even if it was slow as fuck. Reiner appreciated it. He gets out after unbuckling his seat belt, and opens the backseat door to reveal Bertholdt's splayed out body. Looking in, he notices Bertholdt isn't even awake. He's breathing though, so that's good. 

He reaches in and gives pats to Bertholdt's perspired cheeks with both of his hands until Bertholdt makes a startled noise and weakly smacks his hands away. Reiner sighs and leans in to hook his arms under Bertholdt's torso. He pulls him up despite his protests.

“Need help?” he hears Marco offer from the driver's seat, and Reiner shakes his head. He pulls Bertholdt into a sitting position. Bertholdt is awake now, but is giving Reiner a light glare. Reiner can't help but smirk at that.

“C'mon Bertl, we gotta go. When we get to our room, you can sleep there, okay?” Reiner gently says to him, and Bertholdt shakes his head. “Don't want to get up” Bertholdt states before he begins to lay back, but Reiner grabs his biceps before he can.

“We can bring you to your warm, comfortable bed with your blankets and your pillow, okay? Isn't that better than a car seat?” Reiner presses, looking into Bertholdt's squinting eyes. Bertholdt hums loudly, before grumbling, “Fffine.”

Reiner smiles, relieved he won't be difficult, and then he hooks an arm under Bertholdt's, and gets a secure hold around his back before he attempts to pull him to a standing position. Bertholdt grumbles as he sets his unsteady feet on the ground. He instantly leans over into Reiner, and Reiner stumbles a little but catches himself. 

He curses under his breath, and then calls a good-bye to Marco, before shutting the door behind them. Marco doesn't leave yet though, he waits to be sure Reiner and Bertholdt are okay. Reiner struggles to fix Bertholdt upright.

“Damn it, Bertholdt, if you don't try to stand yourself, I'm going to so kick your ass in the morning”, Reiner hisses, and that seems to convince Bertholdt. Bertholdt giggles a little at his words, but straightens himself from leaning on Reiner. Reiner situates Bertholdt's arm over his shoulder, and then begins towards the dormitory building.

“You got him?” Marco calls, and Reiner gives a thumbs up. He hears the car back out, and then the crunching of the gravel as Marco leaves. Sighing, Reiner helps Bertholdt to the entrance of the building. Its annoying attempting to open the front door, but he manages it. Once inside the lobby, he recalls the stupid staircase. Groaning, he loses the will.

He gently lets Bertholdt sit on the floor. Bertholdt hums again and gives Reiner a lopsided grin.

“You're strong, huh?” he muses in a slur, and reaches out to weakly grab at Reiner's biceps. Panting quietly, Reiner looks at him, crouched to his level. Bertholdt squeezes his muscles and then laughs. 

“Your arm is muscley”, Bertholdt says and it makes Reiner grin lightly in amusement. 

“Well, I'm going to have to carry you with these 'muscely' arms”, Reiner replies, “Is that okay?”

Bertholdt looks at him with a dumbfounded expression as he tries to process it. And when he does, he snorts, laughing presumably, and then nods. “Yeah, you can carry me any day, Reiner”, he slurs back, and Reiner tilts his head at him in mild confusion. Reiner doesn't even know what he means by that, but he takes it as a confirmation. 

He scoots a little closer, to reach his arms out, hooking one under Bertholdt's legs, the other supporting his upper back. With a strained grunt, he lifts him up and stands simultaneously. Luckily, Bertholdt is lighter than he anticipated. But seeing as he was kinda drunk, he struggled a little bit. He could handle it though. He knows he won't drop him. 

Bertholdt hooks his arms around Reiner's neck and lolls his head back. Reiner focuses on carrying him up the first flight of stairs. When there's a break between the first and second, he pauses to take a breather. Then, he continues up the second. At this time, Reiner decides he's going to formally complain to the college, demanding an elevator to be installed. 

When he finally makes it to their floor, he stops to sit down in the hallway. He keeps Bertholdt in his lap as he pants heavily, resting his head back against the wall. Its nicely cool in the hallway. Bertholdt, instead of letting his head hang back, rests it on Reiner's shoulder. Reiner, after a minute of leaning back into the wall, raises his head to look over at Bertholdt. Bertholdt wasn't so noisy anymore.

He was watching Reiner with fluttering eyelids again. His mouth had fallen open a little bit. Reiner smiles gently at him, and thinks that is really cute. Bertholdt is strangely cute, and Reiner wonders why that is. When he shivers due to the cold of the hallway, he decides they should go to their room now. 

“Alright, I'm not carrying you anymore. Get up”, he says, and Bertholdt pouts at him. Reiner slips out from underneath him and stands. He grabs Bertholdt's arm and hoists him up, securing an arm around the taller boy. Bertholdt leans into him as they begin towards the room.

Reiner is exhausted by the time he manages to dig one of their keys out and unlock the door. When Bertholdt falls onto his own bed with a bounce, Reiner feels like doing the same. But, he has something to do first. He shuts and locks the door behind himself, and then approaches his desk to grab one of the cups he bought when Bertholdt was sick. He enters their bathroom to fill it with water. 

Returning to Bertholdt, he sits beside his head. “Bertholdt, drink”, Reiner says, earning Bertholdt's bleary eyes as he slides a hand under his head to lift it. Bertholdt manages to prop up on an elbow. He attempts to take the cup, but Reiner knows he'll spill it on himself. He helps him drink it. Bertholdt sighs after drinking the water, and wipes at his chin where some of it ran down as Reiner stands to re-fill the cup. 

After urging him to drink two and a half cups of water (to relieve his hangover in the morning), Reiner knows he can't leave him like that, sprawled and completely clothed on his bed. What kind of friend would he be, in the end?

“Bertholdt, what drawer has your pyjamas?”

“...Third.”

Reiner finds his pyjama bottoms in the third drawer of Bertholdt's dresser, and grabs a random short sleeved t-shirt, before returning to Bertholdt. “Here”, he says as he drops the clothing onto Bertholdt. 

“Thanks”, Bertholdt slurs and then proceeds to drape the articles of clothing over his face. Sighing, Reiner reaches over to snatch them again. “Alright, lift your hips, you lazy ass”, he commands, and Bertholdt does as he's told.

Reiner can't help but blush a little as he unbuttons Bertholdt's jeans, before he wiggles them down. They catch on Bertholdt's boxers and begin to pull them with, but Reiner stops in time. His cheeks fill more with blood. He gingerly pulls his boxers higher before he carefully removes his jeans. Bertholdt makes some noises, but doesn't seem to care. Reiner has seen him in his boxers before, so its honestly not a big deal.

Its more difficult to pull his pyjama pants on. Bertholdt is completely limp as a rag doll though, so that's helpful. The pant legs get stuck on his toes a few times, but due to its smooth fabric, Reiner eventually eases it over his underwear. Reiner sighs and then takes a hold of Bertholdt's sweater.

“Lift your arms”, he instructs, and once Bertholdt slides his arms up above his head, Reiner pulls up his shirt. Reiner glances down briefly, and looks at his tan chest and darkly colored nipples, but then averts his eyes. He tosses the damp sweater onto the floor and grabs the t-shirt he previously recovered from the dresser.

After pulling it on over a struggling Bertholdt, Reiner can _finally_ go to bed. He begins to stand from the bed with a grateful sigh, but then a hand grabs his wrist. Reiner looks back to see Bertholdt gazing up at him with weak eyes and a light frown.

“Cuddle with me...okay?” Bertholdt whispers in a slur, and Reiner has to look away to hide his embarrassed face and flushed cheeks. Damn, that was so fucking cute!

Reiner looks back, and decides he cannot refuse him when he asks that in such a way. Maybe that's a little gay. Whatever. Reiner sighs and then climbs back onto the bed with him. Bertholdt looks so happy when Reiner scoots closer and hooks one of his arms around Bertholdt's midsection. Bertholdt hums and nuzzles into him.

“God, you stink”, Reiner mutters, and Bertholdt hums again in reply. Reiner knows Bertholdt will freak in the morning, finding them like this, but Reiner is totally not going to get up later just to move to his own bed. Not to mention...Bertholdt was really comfortable and warm. 

Reiner feels a hand touch the side of his face. Fingers touch the skin, and then slide into his hair. 

“Y'know, I can't sleep if you do that”, Reiner grumbles, and Bertholdt giggles before pulling his hand away. Then its quiet, save for their breathing.

Within ten minutes, Reiner passes out with Bertholdt in his hold.


	17. Chapter 17

The first thing Bertholdt felt upon waking up the following morning, was a pain behind his eyes. Then it was the ache in his head. He weakly opens his eyes, and then clenches them shut when sunlight lands upon them. It hurt to open his eyes, but he does anyways, and tiredly gazes in front of him. He furrows his brow when he finds himself staring at Reiner's sleeping face. He slowly props up on a hand, and looks around. 

Utterly confused, he realized he was messily draped across Reiner's midsection. Bertholdt groans quietly when pain pricks at his head. He places his palm over his forehead, and looks down at Reiner as the blond lets out loud snores that doesn't help with his headache. Bertholdt is curious to why he was sharing a bed with him, but he isn't going to make a fuss of it. That would just make his hangover worse. 

Instead, Bertholdt sits up from the other and rubs at his face. Looking down at himself, he notices he's dressed in his pyjamas. Although, he's wearing one of his normal shirts, not the one he typically slept in. Did he manage to change into his pyjamas himself? He doesn't remember much. It was all fuzzy.

He doesn't ponder over it though. He has more pressing matters. Like how shitty he felt at that moment. He crawls over Reiner and steps off the bed. The pant legs to his pyjama pants are rolled up and its really annoying. They fall back into place, though, when he paces into their bathroom. He grabs his brush, shampoo, and body scrub after he relieves his bladder. Then he re-enters the dorm room, and looks over at Reiner. He was still snoring away.

He'll probably be out for another two hours or so. Bertholdt exits the room to begin towards the showers.

 

Bertholdt doesn't have a problem spending an hour just to finish getting ready for the day. Its Sunday, so its justified. He sits in the shower for thirty minutes, soaking in the warmth of the water, before the water goes cold. He doesn't care that he hogged the water. He was the one with the hangover anyways. When he gets out, he takes his time to dry off, and brush his hair in front of the wide mirror above the sinks.

Admittedly, he feels a lot better after the shower. He doesn't feel so gross anymore. And even he could tell he reeked of alcohol and sweat. He kind of felt bad for Reiner. That reminded him though, of the mystery of waking up in a bed with Reiner. Strange. He'll ask Reiner about it.

When he gets back to the room, Reiner is still, in fact, passed out on his bed. Bertholdt changes into daily clothing as Reiner snores obnoxiously, filling the silence. Once he threw his pyjamas and the clothes from last night (that were crumpled on the floor) into the laundry hamper, he stood in the center of the room, unsure of what to do. He wonders what he could do that would be productive, as he gazes over at Reiner on the bed. Reiner's leg was falling off the bed. That should be a start.

Bertholdt approaches the bed, and reaches over to lift Reiner's leg back under the covers. He notices that Reiner is still wearing his casual clothing. He never changed? At least that proved they didn't do anything stupid last night. Otherwise he wouldn't be wearing anything. Neither of them would be. Why was Bertholdt even considering it in the first place? Reiner was straight.

Shaking his head at himself, Bertholdt situates his leg to a comfortable position, before he fixes the covers over him. Standing over Reiner, Bertholdt crosses his arms and wonders how he could let Reiner convince him to drink like that.

It doesn't matter in the end. It happened, so Bertholdt wasn't going to fret over it. As long as he didn't do anything embarrassing in his intoxication, it wasn't a big deal. Bertholdt looks around the room. Reiner's clothing was on the floor by his bed, and his bed itself was haphazard and cluttered. Bertholdt decides some cleaning will do. He doesn't turn on the light though. The sunlight drifting in through the window should be enough. 

First, he gathers all of Reiner's clothing off the hardwood floor, and tosses it all into the hamper. He may as well start a load, too. Once the floor is clear, he approaches Reiner's bed. He sets Reiner's papers and books on his desk momentarily. He finds some wads of dollar bills hidden in the sheets, as well as some empty Gatorade bottles. Bertholdt actually laughs quietly to himself. Reiner could be such a slob. Compared to Bertholdt's standards, anyways. 

He puts the money on Reiner's desk, and tosses out the bottles. Then he begins to fix the covers. He stops though, and lifts it to his face to lightly smell it. Okay, his blanket definitely needed a wash, too. He gathers it in his arms with a grimace, and then shoves it into the laundry hamper as well. He strips off the pillowcase to his pillow as well. After shoving that into the hamper, he looks around. That's pretty much it. As time passed of Reiner bunking with Bertholdt, Reiner learned to become more neat due to Bertholdt's complaints. 

So, Bertholdt turns to grab the laundry hamper. He leaves the room, and begins the trek down the staircase with the hamper against his hip. Why does the laundry room have to be near the lobby? Bertholdt is so through with the stairs he has to descend every goddamn day. 

After the large load was in the washing machine, whirring away, Bertholdt pauses to withdraw his phone from his pocket. He forgot to check it earlier. Opening it, he notices he has a text from Annie. It was sent eleven hours ago.

“ _Stop drunk texting me about Reiner's ass or I Swear To God I am going to tell him about your dumb crush_ ”

Bertholdt blushes a little bit in embarrassment, as he scrolls through the previous texts. He had, in fact, sent Annie multiple texts about Reiner's ass. And his abs. There were a lot of typos. Maybe his drunk self decided Annie telling Reiner about that was a bad thing, and stopped. That's good. 

He sighs as he types up an apology text to her. 

Then he puts his phone away, and leaves the laundry room. He'll come back in twenty minutes or so. 

When Bertholdt returns to the room, he quietly shuts the door behind him and looks over to his bed, to see Reiner sitting up with a hand rubbing at his face. “Hey”, Bertholdt greets, and it earns Reiner's raised eyes. Reiner stares up at him for a long moment, and Bertholdt stares back awkwardly, leaning against the door with his hands resting flat against the wood. 

“Um”, they both simultaneously begin, and then Bertholdt blushes and motions to Reiner, urging him to speak. Reiner sits up straighter and runs a hand through his blond hair.

“How much do you remember from last night?” Reiner asks in the dimly lit room, his golden eyes fixed on Bertholdt. Bertholdt worries at his lip and gives a light shrug. 

“Not much. The last thing I remember is..I think Sasha tripping down the stairs or something. And following that it became blurry.”

Reiner smiles a little, remembering that, and then nods. 

“What about you?” Bertholdt quietly asks, gaze falling to Reiner's lips. The smile drops from them, and then they purse a little bit. Reiner licks his lips, and it makes Bertholdt look away. Reiner hums and then shrugs, “Everything, pretty much. Just general things though.”

Bertholdt has curiosity poking at him. Silence maintains it's grasp for a long minute. They're both quiet, until Bertholdt forces himself to ask.

“Why were you sleeping with me in my bed?”

Reiner laughs nervously at that, and rubs at his neck. Bertholdt watches him quietly past his bangs, head dipped down a little in shyness. Reiner is fiddling with his hands as he speaks again, in answer.

“You wouldn't let me leave.”

Bertholdt wished that wasn't the case, honestly, but he never really trusted his drunk self. Damn it. He feels his face grow hot with embarrassment. Reiner looks embarrassed too. Bertholdt bites at his lip, before saying gently, “Sorry.” He hopes he didn't make him feel uncomfortable.

Reiner raises his eyes to Bertholdt, and shakes his head.

“No, its okay.”

And then silence comes back once more. They don't say anything else, so Bertholdt pushes from the door and walks over to his bed, and sits on the side, nearby to Reiner. Reiner is quiet, and Bertholdt feels his gaze on him. Bertholdt glances at him briefly over his shoulder, and then ducks his head down.

“I hope I didn't do anything weird..”, Bertholdt grumbles under his breath, and blushes a deeper red. He feels his ears grow hot, too. He regrets what he just said, and curses at himself mentally. He always has to make everything awkward, didn't he?

Reiner is strangely quiet. Bertholdt looks over at him and sees him staring at his own lap, fingers fidgeting again. Bertholdt's fingers scratch at his clothed thighs nervously as Reiner clears his throat.

“You kind of did. I mean like, not a bad weird...but a Bertholdt weird, y'know? Like...you wouldn't have done it if you were sober.”

Bertholdt feels his heart race in his chest and a sweat break out over his skin. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He hated his drunk self, officially. Why did he always have to do stupid things? 

“..What did I do?”

Reiner laughs a little bit, and rubs at his neck again. Bertholdt can't help but watch him. Reiner is blushing, too. Shit, what could he have possibly done? He pales when he considers the fact he may have said something he would strongly regret. Like, right now. He regrets everything from last night right now.

“To be honest...you were kind of all over me. I mean, that's fine. Its not like it bothered me, really.”

Bertholdt's stomach clenches painfully and Bertholdt instantly raises his hands to hide his face, turning away from the other. Damn it, he was so embarrassed! Why, oh why, was Bertholdt such a moron? And a loser, and an idiot. Bertholdt belittles himself over and over until he processes what Reiner just said.

“Wait—what?” Bertholdt drops his hands and looks over at him. Reiner was watching him with a face that Bertholdt couldn't decide to be either surprise or...something else. Bertholdt watches him. Reiner shrugs, dropping his strange expression that Bertholdt couldn't decipher. 

“You didn't..mind it? Why?” Bertholdt presses, turning to face him a little. Reiner smirks a little and looks him in the eyes.

“'Cause you're my best friend, Bertholdt. I don't mind if you like to be...affectionate, or whatever. I don't mind having friends like that”, Reiner says truthfully, smiling at Bertholdt, before he adds as an afterthought, “Well, unless you're only like that when you're drunk. But still, either way.” Bertholdt stares at him, blushing again, and then looks away. 

“Okay.”

He feels a hand rest on his upper back, between his shoulder blades. It gives a few rubs and Bertholdt tenses up entirely. He feels his palms grow clammy with nervousness. He flicks his gaze momentarily to Reiner. Reiner was looking at the floor. He drops his hand a moment later, and then raises his eyes back to Bertholdt's.

“Well. I'm going to take a shower now”, Reiner muses, and then slides off the bed. Bertholdt wildly wonders what the heck that touch was about, but then Reiner stands, and stretches. When he does so, it raises the end of Reiner's shirt, and Bertholdt's eyes zero onto the flesh that is exposed for a moment. He blinks a few times and looks away when Reiner turns to approach the door. 

He leaves without another word. Bertholdt falls back onto his bed, hides his face, and moans into it. That was so...different. What was that, even? Bertholdt drops his hands and stares up at the ceiling. Well, its obvious now, though. Their relationship has progressed. Bertholdt can tell Reiner is more comfortable around him. Maybe its not that clear, but Reiner obviously meant something when he said he doesn't mind affection.

Thinking about it makes Bertholdt flustered again.

\----------

Two days since the party, Bertholdt has a constant feeling that he's being watched. There is always that small sensation, a feeling that someone is staring at you. He can't shake that feeling off. It picks at him for the majority of the day. He doesn't get that feeling during classes. When he has free time, that's when it comes back to him. It was annoying.

One day, during Mr. Bossard's, when they're going over a lecture, Bertholdt receives a text. He feels his phone vibrate in his pocket. Silently and smoothly, he reaches into his jeans and withdraws his phone. Opening it, he reads it with a furrowed brow. It was from Marco.

“ _It seems someone has the hots for u, Bertholdt~!_ ”

What the hell? He looks over at Marco by his side, and Marco is staring ahead, but a smirk-like smile is upon his lips. Bertholdt arches a brow and begins to reply.

“ _What are you talking about_ ”

He hears the quiet vibrations of Marco's phone, and shortly, the tapping of his fingers. 

“ _You'll see_ ”

Bertholdt rolls his eyes. He doesn't even bother replying. Instead, he gives a small nudge to Marco's side with his elbow, and gets a quiet chuckle in return. That just makes Bertholdt more paranoid, though. 

So he wasn't just being wary. Maybe there really was someone watching him. What the fuck.

Why the hell would someone 'have the hots' for him anyways? Only a handful of people even acknowledged him throughout the whole campus. Why would someone develop an interest in him so randomly? And why would _Marco_ be aware of this? Was it someone that they both knew? Or was Marco just messing with him? He ponders over it for the remainder of his classes.

By the time he returns to his dorm room, the concern was far from his mind, though. He had more notes to go over, and Mr. Bossard assigned a new book (so soon, following the finals..), and Bertholdt wanted to get ahead. So after finding the room empty, he hurries to dig the book out of his bag, and plops down on his bed to begin reading it.

A good thirty minutes pass, before the door is opened and Reiner walks in. Bertholdt raises his gaze from his book and looks up at Reiner. Reiner is pulling off his coat as he approaches his bed. He takes a heavy seat. From the top of his book, Bertholdt notices that Reiner glances at him. Reiner's gaze doesn't linger though. When he realizes Bertholdt is watching him, his honey colored eyes drop back to whatever his hands were preoccupied with. He began to pull off his boots.

“Hey, Bertl”, Reiner finally says, giving Bertholdt a brief smile. Bertholdt returns it weakly, and softly replies, “Hi.” 

“How were your classes?”

Bertholdt pauses, and then wonders if Reiner had even asked him that before. Maybe once or twice. Bertholdt shrugs lightly even though Reiner isn't looking at him.

“Boring. What about you?”

“I couldn't focus..of course”, Reiner replies, glancing up to give Bertholdt a grin, and then yanks off his last boot before he tosses it aside. Bertholdt hums and then drops his eyes back to his book. He hears Reiner stand to grab his laptop from his desk, before returning to his bed. Bertholdt listens to the chiming of Reiner's laptop as it starts up.

They sit in silence for about ten minutes, before Reiner sighs, and then shuts his laptop. Bertholdt looks over at him from where he lay on his belly atop his bed. He notices Reiner is looking over at him.

“Hey, you want to get a coffee?” Reiner asks lightly, setting his laptop aside. His legs were crossed on the bed, with his hands resting in his lap now. Bertholdt blinks a few times, a little surprised Reiner asked that. 

“Oh! Yeah, sure, let me just finish this page”, Bertholdt says, feeling his cheeks warm a little, and watches as Reiner nods. Bertholdt wonders why Reiner even bothered taking off his shoes and coat, then. Maybe he just felt restless today. Bertholdt focuses on finishing the page. It only takes him a moment. Then he bookmarks it, and sets his book aside.

“Okay, let's go”, Bertholdt says as he stands from the bed. Reiner gives him a smile as he stands himself. Bertholdt approaches the door, and grabs his shoes from where they were pushed against the wall beside it. Then he pulls them on. He hears Reiner put his shoes on as well. 

“Was it cold out when you got back?” Bertholdt asks as he looks over at the blond. Reiner was tying one of his boots, as he says, “Not really. It got warmer.” Bertholdt hums, and decides his hoodie would be suitable enough. Bertholdt smooths it out and then checks his phone. No texts. He puts it back in his jean's pocket before lifting his gaze. Reiner had finished tying his shoes, so Bertholdt turns to open the door.

 

The walk to the Starbucks was kind of nice. Reiner was quiet the entire time, actually. It was a little surprising. They were walking side by side, and Bertholdt noticed little things, like how Reiner was stepping up a little closer than usual and he would occasionally glance at the taller boy. Bertholdt kept his hands in the big pocket of his hoodie. His hands would grow cold anyways. Reiner was letting his hands by his sides though, whereas usually he kept them in his pockets too. Strange. And Reiner was eerily quiet, too. Maybe he was just acting different. It could be as simple as that.

Bertholdt worries if he did something at the party, that upset him. It has been a few days since then, but maybe it was _really_ upsetting. Reiner was straight, and maybe he didn't appreciate having a gay friend apparently be 'affectionate' with him. Bertholdt cringes physically at that thought. Bertholdt's mood worsens. 

But by the time they are seated and they have their respectful drinks, Bertholdt's attention returns to Reiner once more. As they sit there, by the wide window, they do share conversation. Its mostly small talk, but Bertholdt is glad its not silent. That would be weird. Bertholdt actually feels weird about this in general, but attempts to disregard that feeling. 

When they start talking about the upcoming holiday, it reminds Bertholdt he still needed to get gifts for his friends. He stresses over it for the remainder of the day. He decides that tomorrow, he definitely was going to go out and get some gifts.

\----------

In the end, Bertholdt purchased a pair of mittens for Marco (he knows Marco loves bears, so he bought a pair designed with polar bears, snowflakes, and Christmas lights. It was actually really cute), and a Doctor Who t-shirt for Annie. He made sure it was of the 9th Doctor. He was her favorite. 

He was still debating over what to get for Reiner, though. From the few stores he went to, nothing there was suitable. So he decided he would think about what to get for him a little longer.


	18. Chapter 18

Seeing as Christmas break was in a few days, Bertholdt had to decide what he should get for Reiner sooner than later. 

There was a vibe throughout the campus. People were obviously looking forward to Christmas in itself, as well as the break. Bertholdt wasn't specifically looking forward to going back home for a few weeks, but it's better than staying behind at the dorms like some people were. Reiner was going home too, so there was even more reason for Bertholdt not to stay behind. And Bertholdt missed his ferret, as well. 

Seeing as the date of Christmas would come during the break, the group decided to trade gifts a day before the official break. Marco was really excited to tell Bertholdt about it through text. They were to meet in the lounge room, like they typically do. Bertholdt was kind of anxious about the fact he didn't get gifts for everyone, but maybe they would understand. He wasn't all too close to the majority of them. In fact, he was only close with Marco and Reiner, despite the fact he's been around the others for months, as an additional friend to Reiner. And plus, he should save the money for something else. 

At the last opportunity, he came across something at a common super store when he drove there in an attempt to come across something that blatantly spoke to him as a gift for Reiner. Maybe it was a little pathetic having to think of something at the last moment, seeing as he was close to Reiner, but he didn't want to make it stupid. Maybe it was stupid anyways.

He ended up getting a small pillow in the shape and design of a football. Okay, maybe that was really stupid. But he thought its something that Reiner would use more often than not, and it would remind him of Bertholdt whenever he would use it or see it. Bertholdt has a feeling Reiner would like it anyways. He feels confident about his choice when he checks it out. It wasn't too expensive, either.

Luckily, Reiner is out when he returns to the dorm, probably hanging with his friends like usual during this week, right before break. Bertholdt puts the gift in his hiding place along with Marco's gift. He wrapped up Annie's gift a while ago. He can give it to her whenever. She'll probably end up coming over to Bertholdt's house during the break like she does every year. Bertholdt's dad practically considers her family anyways. 

Bertholdt distantly thinks about that as he takes a seat on his bed, with his coat and scarf and shoes all still on. He stares at his lap past his scarf as he wonders if Reiner will like what he's gotten him. Glancing over at Reiner's part of the room, he notices there's some of Reiner's clothing atop his bed. Bertholdt stands, and quietly approaches the bed.

Looking down, he stares at Reiner's favorite hoodie. It had a logo of what Bertholdt assumed to be a high school football team. At least, it wasn't a football logo that Bertholdt recognized. He assumed it was from Reiner's high school years, because the logo is kind of crackly and worn. He reaches down to drift his fingers over the fabric. It was soft. He grabs it and lifts it to gaze closer at the logo. 

Standing at the foot of Reiner's bed, he hesitates to bring it to his face, but he does, and inhales. He knows that's creepy and he knows its totally not an acceptable thing to do, but it smells exactly like Reiner, and it really comforts him. He exhales into the fabric and then lowers it to hold it to his chest. He was being really creepy of course, but he couldn't really hold back the urge to do that. He walks back to his bed and drapes the hoodie atop his blanket. Bertholdt blushes in the face as he removes his coat and scarf. Laying those on his bed as well, he then reaches over to grab the hoodie once more.

He pulls it on over his sweater. Looking down, he realizes its much more bigger than him. It droops a little and the sleeves are loose. He smiles softly, and then turns his head to the side, before he pulls the fabric over his shoulder to his nose. 

Damn it. This was really stupid, and he knew it.

He hugs himself and then takes a seat on his bed. After a moment of distantly staring at the hardwood floor, he falls over onto his side atop his bed, and closes his eyes. It was so comfortable. He brings it to his face again. 

Maybe he should stop, before Reiner comes in suddenly and catches him doing a weird thing.

So, Bertholdt pulls it over his head, and then holds it in his hands. Staring at the worn down logo, he hesitates to put it back on Reiner's bed. He curses mentally as he hides the hoodie deep under his covers. He was so deep under this crush, it was getting ridiculous. Flustered, he restlessly stands and begins to put his coat and scarf away. Reiner wasn't oblivious enough to not notice his favorite hoodie missing. Bertholdt blushes deeply, and then takes a seat on his bed once more. With his arms hugged close to his chest, he leans over until he's resting on his thighs, and stares at his feet, before he thinks about what he's actually doing, and blushes all over again. He hides his face and groans. 

Why isn't this stupid crush dying already?

\----------

Three days later, the group meet in the lounge room.

Luckily, the lounge room is empty. When Bertholdt and Reiner enter the lounge room, they find only Marco and Jean sitting on the couch. They were quiet, and only turned back when Reiner called out a hello. Marco was instantly grinning and jumping up to run around the couch. He excitedly said they could exchange the gifts at the large table in the center of the room, where it usually sat. Bertholdt liked the idea. Reiner agreed and Marco urged Jean to join them. They were still waiting for the others, but for now, they sit together and idly talk about what they plan to do during the break.

Within a few minutes, Connie breaks into the room with an armful of grocery bags. He calls out a 'yo!' to everyone and then proceeds to dump the bags across the table. 

“Nice job on the wrapping, Connie”, Jean says as Connie huddles all of them close to his own side, where he sat. Connie said a thanks. 

“Sasha should arrive soon”, Connie announces and Marco smiles at that. Bertholdt feels his own smile growing. Marco just had a really nice attitude. Jean wasn't scowling, either.

Soon, Eren joins them (Marco did mention that Armin had left earlier than the others, so he wouldn't be here), and then Sasha runs in. It must have taken longer for her to come, because she lives in a different dorm building entirely. She claims a spot next to Connie. Now that they're all sitting in a circle around the table, with various wrapped gifts atop the surface, Marco then says the gift exchanges shall now commence.

Its kind of hectic as everyone gives each other their respective gifts. Bertholdt simply waits for it to calm. He's given something from Reiner, Marco, and surprisingly, Connie and Jean as well. He feels really bad for not getting them something. Once all the gifts are passed about, Marco claims that one person at a time will unwrap. That is, unless they wanted to save it for Christmas itself, then they could just wait. 

The first person to open their gifts is Sasha. She received this container of various types of cheeses from Marco. Her eyes widened considerably and she gave him a hug that he nervously returned. She received a cute pair of bunny ear muffs from Connie, with matching gloves, and some sort of DS video game from Reiner. She gave them each hugs. Bertholdt watched with a smile upon his lips. Next was Connie. He got a joke gift from Jean. It was Mad Libs.

“Maybe filling those out will put something into that empty head of yours”, Jean had said with a smirk. Connie merely laughed and smacked him on the arm. Jean laughed, too. Sasha gave him a personally knitted hat (for his bald head, she added) and a new set of headphones, because he always ends up breaking his. Connie looked honestly happy with his gifts. He instantly put on his silly looking hat. Sasha was smiling genuinely, Bertholdt could tell. Reiner got Connie some sort of gift card. It looked like it was for an online video game.

Jean received a cliché packet of cards from Marco, that could be redeemed for hugs, kisses, massages, etc. Jean blushed really darkly at that. Marco also announces he has another gift for Jean, but it was more private. Jean's face was absolutely red and he actually looks at Marco with horror. Eren makes a gagging sound and Marco grins widely. Reiner laughs at that, too. Eren gave Jean a small packet of gum. Eren said it was to relieve the stench of the bullshit always coming out of his mouth. Jean merely laughed at that, and Eren was actually grinning a little. Connie actually had a joke gift in return. It was a tube of lipstick. Connie claimed it was to make him look prettier. Marco cried from laughter at that. 

Marco, thankfully, was extremely happy with Bertholdt's gift. He even stood and walked around the table to give him a little hug. Bertholdt was a little embarrassed about it, but he hugged back anyways. Reiner gave him a stuffed bear. Sasha gave him gummy bears and chocolate. And Bertholdt assumed Jean got him something that was already given. Marco looked very happy with it all. He whined that he wasn't _that_ fond of bears, but he was smiling and laughing like he didn't mind at all. 

The first gift Reiner opened was Connie's classy plastic bag. It was a beanie with some football team's logo on it. Reiner gushed about it and instantly put it on. He received a gift card from Marco, some more food from Sasha, ear buds from Jean, and a cheap frilly bra from Eren (Reiner smacked him for that). He actually gave Bertholdt a small, one-armed hug for the football pillow. Bertholdt was relieved he liked it.

As for Bertholdt, he opened Reiner's gift first. It was a long, navy blue scarf with snowflakes designed into the stitch. He loved it instantly, and didn't know what to say. Instead of words, he wrapped it around his neck and gave Reiner a smile. Reiner grinned with triumph. Then he opened Marco's. It was a stuffed ferret with it's own little scarf, mittens, and hat sewn on. Bertholdt thanked Marco with a big smile. Okay, even if it was lame, he liked receiving stuffed animals as gifts. Jean had gotten him a really obnoxious Christmas sweater. Bertholdt laughed and thanked him as well. Connie gave him a pair of thin gloves that suspiciously matched the Christmas sweater. 

Bertholdt felt overwhelmed with the amount of gifts he received, despite it not being too much. He didn't expect a gift from Jean or Connie. He felt bad, and told them he was sorry for not getting them anything. They said it was no problem, though. 

Following receiving his things, Bertholdt wasn't all too focused on watching Eren opening his. He admired the snowflakes on his scarf instead. While Eren stood to smack Jean for getting him a cheap nose hair trimmer, Bertholdt fiddled with the small stuffed ferret. 

It took a while to clean up the wrapping paper and the bags, because Connie kept dropping the wrapping paper on Sasha and she would grab the plastic bags and try to pull them over Connie's head. Eventually Jean and Eren told them to knock it off, and then the two solemnly helped clean up. 

While everyone else loitered around in the lounge room, Bertholdt excused himself after thanking everyone again, and carried his things back across the hallway to their dorm room. Once he was within the comforting confines of the room, he shut the door behind him and sat down on the bed with his things. 

He put the gifts to his side, except for Reiner's. He kept it around his neck and held the ends in his hands. He looked down at the snowflakes and couldn't help but smile to himself. Unlike the noisiness of the lounge room, it was nice and quiet within their dorm room. Glancing up, he looks around. Reiner's duffel bag was on his bed, like their first day here. It was no doubt full of his things, ready to go. Bertholdt had finished packing the majority of his needed things as well, besides the daily necessities. 

Bertholdt thinks back on the first time he met Reiner. 

 

The time runs away from him, as he is deep in his thoughts. What startles him from his thoughts and staring at his scarf, is the door opening. He looks up to see Reiner walk in, with a bag in his hand and his beanie on his head.

“Oh, hey”, Reiner greets him with a grin, and shuts the door behind him.

“Do you like it?” Reiner muses as he claims a seat beside Bertholdt. Bertholdt bounces a little from Reiner's weight joining him on the bed. He places a hand on the bed and nods, smiling. He drops his eyes from Reiner's.

“Yeah, I do. Thanks.”

“Well, your scarf always looked too small and thin. So..”

“I see.”

“And I will cherish that football pillow for the rest of my life.”

“I wouldn't go that far..”

Reiner laughs and then nods, before he stands.

“Well. I think I'm going to head to bed early tonight. It's...almost ten, right? Yeah”, Reiner claims, glancing at his alarm clock on the small table by his bed, and then looks over at Bertholdt as he stretches his arms out above his head.

“What about you?”

Bertholdt watches him and then nods. “Me too, I guess.”

Reiner nods, smiles, and then pulls his beanie off his head to toss it onto his duffel bag. He pulls his duffel bag off, and then grabs his pyjamas from his dresser. He begins to change, so Bertholdt looks away. He stands himself, and takes off the scarf. He looks at it, before resting it on his desk. He'll wear it tomorrow, when he leaves the campus. Then, he grabs his own pyjamas, and escapes into the bathroom. 

\----------

In the morning, Bertholdt gets up thirty minutes before Reiner. He takes a quick shower, and comes back to the dorm to find Reiner still in bed. The other people in their dorm probably already left. They honestly could have left yesterday too. Bertholdt would have, if he didn't have the friends like he did. Without the gift exchange, and without Reiner, he would have gone home earlier than the set date. But he stayed behind til the last day, because Reiner was.

He looks over at Reiner as he rubs a towel over his head, to get the last of the dampness out of his hair. Then he grabs his brush, and walks into the bathroom. He already dressed into his daily clothing in the changing room of the showers, so he only had to brush his hair and teeth, and then he was done getting ready. 

And once he's done with that, he leaves the bathroom, and notices that Reiner was now awake. Propped up on an elbow, Reiner was rubbing at his eyes. His close cut hairstyle had actually grown a little bit since the last time he got it cut, so it was considered a bed head now. It was really messy. Bertholdt smiled and said a good morning as he walks over to his desk. 

Reiner mumbles a good morning in return as he slips out of his bed. 

“Going to take a shower?” Bertholdt asks as he puts his toiletries into a plastic bag to put into the bag he was taking with him to his home. Reiner groans and then says, “No.” Bertholdt looks over at him.

“Where do you live, anyways?”

“With my parents in a condo. Its further into the city.”

“Ah, I see. Are you looking forward to seeing them?”

Reiner stands with a sigh, and stretches with a groan. He rubs at his neck as he raises his eyes to Bertholdt.

“Not really. I mean, I don't care either way. They're fine. I'm more excited to see my dog again, to be honest.” 

Bertholdt smiles, “I feel the same. I've missed my ferret more than my dad.” Reiner laughs and then pulls his tank top off to reveal his abs and well defined chest. Bertholdt blushes and looks away before his heart can go on a rampage. He takes a seat on his bed and takes out his phone. He felt it vibrate a few minutes ago. He opens the text. It was from Annie.

“ _hey, I'm waiting outside for you. I dunno why you would want to leave so early in the goddamn morning but whatever._ ”

Exhaling shakily, he raises his gaze back to Reiner. Reiner was pulling on his jeans, unaware of Bertholdt's shy glance. After texting back a reply saying he'd be right there, Bertholdt stands and then grabs his scarf from his desk, and his coat from his bed. He pulls on his coat and secures the long, thick scarf around his neck. When he looks up again, he notices Reiner watching him with a shirt in his grasp, still stupidly shirtless.

“You're going _now_?” Reiner asks, a little dumbfounded, and a look of disappointment crosses his face. 

“Yeah.”

Reiner frowns, and then closes the distance between them to pull Bertholdt into a big hug. Sputtering, Bertholdt flails when Reiner lifts him a little. With his hands pushing on Reiner's warm chest, Bertholdt blushes furiously.

“Idiot, put me down!”, he cries when Reiner is still holding him like that. Then Reiner laughs and does as he's told. Bertholdt stumbles when he's set back down and then shakily fixes his scarf. He smacks Reiner on the head, and Reiner laughs again.

“Hey, I'm just gonna miss teasing you, y'know? Thought I could do it one last time before you left”, Reiner says with a big dumb grin, amusement in his golden eyes. Blushing, Bertholdt huffs and gives him a glare. 

“Its only a few weeks, you know. Plus you can still harass me plenty through texts!” 

“Oh, well.”

Reiner shrugs and then his grin softens. 

“Well, see you later then. Have a nice break.”

“Yeah, I need a nice one from having to deal with you during all these months.”

Reiner barks out a laugh and then pats him roughly on the arm. He smirks.

“Bye”, Reiner says, and Bertholdt nods.

“Bye.”

After giving Reiner a light smile, Bertholdt grabs his bag off his bed, and then turns to leave the room. He knows he'll see him again in a little while, so he doesn't feel bad at all. In fact, he's glad he has a reprieve from having to worry about his affection for the oblivious blond. He can't help but glance back though, even though the door is shut.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egUQju95vT8
> 
> Lovely, lovely fanart for this chapter from my wonderful friend: http://cartoonsinthemorning.tumblr.com/post/76668958865/fan-art-inspired-by-caramel-frappuccinos-and


	19. Chapter 19

Driving down the familiar dirt road to his home gave Bertholdt an uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach. Silently, he and Annie passed the rows of trees on either side of them, like fences trapping them in. Bertholdt watched as they went by. Then a familiar scenery greeted his eyes, and he raised his gaze from out his window, to the view past the windshield. The large cabin-like home was the same as ever. Smoke billowed out from the chimney. Bertholdt thinks distantly that Father must be running the furnace then. When Annie parks before the home, she turns off the car and they don't move.

“Nothing really changed at all”, Bertholdt comments, and Annie hums in return. Then they both unbuckle their seat belts. Annie leaves the car first, due to Bertholdt's hesitance. But then he follows her after a moment. When they approach the front door, Bertholdt reaches out to turn the doorknob. His dad always left it unlocked during the day. No one ever comes out here so it wasn't really a problem.

The inside of the large cabin is much warmer than outside. Bertholdt and Annie shuffle in and Annie sighs in relief. Bertholdt looks over at her as she shuts the door. He removes his scarf as he raises his eyes to the interior. It was like a single large room. The living room was the area of the first floor you would see initially from the entrance. The furnace was in fact lit with the firewood, a bright red glow visible from the small opening. Across from it was the couch, with the two small wooden side tables. Bertholdt's father was insistent with making his furniture himself. As a child, Bertholdt had to help him with it, as well. Although, he built the house before Bertholdt was born.

Glancing around, Bertholdt realized that he must be upstairs, then. As Bertholdt stands there to remove his shoes and coat with his bag at his feet, Annie paces past him to enter the small bathroom beside the staircase. Bertholdt hangs his coat on the antler coat hanger as he watches her go. Once his shoes are set in the small closet by the door, Bertholdt grabs his bag and approaches the staircase. He sets his hand on the finely carved banister as he makes his way up the noisy steps. Of course his presence was announced by their loud creaking under his feet. Due to the fact he lived in this house the majority of his life, he knew where to step to avoid the noise, but didn't think about it until it was too late.

The light at the top of the staircase is off. He turns it on when he makes it to the top, and glances around. The staircase banister continued on past the stairs, into a square like frame, bordering a small sitting area. Standing amongst the two armchairs and the small shelf of books in the sitting area, Bertholdt hesitates to look for his father. He ends up approaching his old bedroom door instead. He enters and turns on the light.

Of course, it remained exactly how it was when he first left for college. His bed was made with his old quilt that he had received from his mother, which had various animals and plants stitched on. His bookshelf was still in alphabetical order, too. His small TV sat atop his dresser, facing the bed, and his Nintendo 64 was perched on the small TV cabinet beside it. After setting his bag on his bed, he approaches the TV cabinet, before he crouches down and opens it. There was a stack of Nintendo games, as well as a small collection of his favorite movies and documentaries. He smiles as he goes through the Nintendo 64 games, now sitting on the floor with his legs crossed.

 

When he's looking through his books on the shelf, he hears the stairs creak. He pauses and looks over to the open entrance of his door. Leaning back a little, he peeks past it to see Annie walking towards his room.

“Hey, what are you doing?” She asks when she enters his room. Bertholdt shrugs and puts the book in his hands away, back into it's previous place. He turns to her, still sitting on the floor. He watches as she takes a bouncy seat on his bed.

“Where's your dad?”

“I don't know. Probably in his room.”

Annie crosses her arms, “Well, his light isn't on, so he's either not here, or sleeping.” Bertholdt frowns and then sighs. 

If he could describe his father, he would say that he would rather go and hunt than buy some meat at the store. His dad liked being in the middle of nowhere, with the animals and nature, rather than in a bustling city with the taint of people. This meant he didn't use a cellphone either, so Bertholdt really didn't have a way to contact him, without coming to the house itself.

His dad did tell him he wouldn't mind having him home for Christmas break, but they never agreed upon a specific time or date for when Bertholdt would come back. And it was unspoken that Annie was welcomed too. Bertholdt had a feeling he liked Annie more than his own son. Its not like Annie is staying the entire break though. Typically, she only comes on Christmas day.

Bertholdt rubs at his eyes with irritation. He'll just have to wait until his dad came back from whatever he was doing, then. 

“You don't have to stay”, he says, raising his soft green eyes to her. Annie was sitting with her legs crossed on his bed. Her blue eyes stare down at him. He stares back. Then she shrugs and plops back onto his bed, resting her arms across her stomach, over her white hoodie. She stares up at the ceiling, and the lined planks of wood.

“I like your place, so I'm going to stay for a while. At least until your dad comes back. Sorry to say, but you're stuck with me for now.”

Bertholdt knows she's just staying for his benefit, but whatever. He shrugs, and then asks, “You want something to eat?”

Raising her head, Annie looks over at him. Then she turns onto her side, facing him, and props her head on a hand. “Nope”, she says, and then smiles lightly. “I think you're forgetting something”, she muses. Bertholdt gives her a look of confusion.

“Hans must be so lonely right now. His trusted owner decided to sulk rather than say hello..”

Just as Annie said that, Bertholdt suddenly recalled his ferret and instantly leaped up. He completely forgot. He was so concerned about coming back that he totally disregarded his pet. Annie watched with amusement as Bertholdt left the room with a quick stride. She gets up and follows him, after turning off the light. 

The stairs complain loudly under his feet as he quickly makes his way down and then he runs up to the cage by the furnace in the living room. He looks in and sees Hans lazing around in his little hammock. He grins brightly and opens the door of the cage. Drawing his hand in, he reaches in to curl his fingers around Hans' warm, slender midsection. His small beady eyes open and look up at Bertholdt. 

Taking him out of the cage, Bertholdt takes a seat on the couch as he cradles Hans in his arms. His body was slender and pliable in his hold. Then Hans began to climb up his arm. He can still feel his sharp nails through the fabric of his sweater. Hans then rests over his shoulder, sniffing at his hair. He didn't even process the creaking of the staircase, because he just notices as Annie walks up. 

“He stinks”, Annie comments as she takes a seat beside Bertholdt. 

“Of course he does, he's a ferret.”

Hans tries to crawl across Bertholdt's upper back with his claws. Bertholdt hisses quietly at the prick of his nails. He reaches around and pries him off, then holds him in his arms once more. Hans' coat was white and he had a pink nose. It twitched slightly as Hans sniffed at Bertholdt's hands. Annie reaches over to stroke her fingertip over his head.

The furnace makes quiet crackling noises as Annie and Bertholdt play with the ferret. Bertholdt starts to sweat from the warmth, so he sets Hans in Annie's arms (which makes her grimace and complain) and pulls his sweater over his head, to reveal his white shirt below. Setting his sweater aside, he grabs Hans again.

“I should give him a bath”, Bertholdt muses as he scratches under Hans' chin lightly. Annie hums and then reaches up to tame the messy locks of Bertholdt's hair. Looking over at her, Bertholdt quirks a brow.

“It got messy from taking off your sweater.”

“Oh. Thanks.”

Then Annie drops her hand. 

Eventually, Bertholdt decides Hans should return to his nap. So he stands and approaches the cage. He sets Hans back into his hammock with difficulty, because Hans keeps latching onto the cuff of his shirt. Bertholdt is able to pry him off after a minute of struggling, and then he latches the door shut once more. He watches as Hans moves about in his hammock. Then he turns and faces Annie. But instead of finding her on the couch, she was back at the entrance. She was peering through the drapes of the small window by the door. 

“Hey, I think that's him”, Annie calls and Bertholdt walks over to look past her shoulder. Bertholdt does indeed spot his dad's truck pulling up into the driveway. His heart jumps and a tight feeling in his stomach blooms. He watches with wide eyes, and lifts a hand to nibble at his fingertips. Annie then looks up at him and grabs him by the wrist. Pulling his hand away, she gives him a glare. He sighs and lowers his hand. 

Bertholdt steps away from the door and instantly returns to his ferret. To distract himself, he sticks a finger in to rub at Hans' head. His dad must have seen Annie's car too, so he knows that they're there. Bertholdt breaks into a nervous sweat. He always was nervous around his father. His father was never a bad man or anything. Bertholdt just obsessively worried what his dad thought of him. And so it stressed him out, wanting to be perfect for his father. His dad always expected him to follow in his footsteps, but Bertholdt was going in the opposite direction.

He wildly worries over it and then the door opening jerks him out of his panicked thoughts. Turning around, he sees his father walking in with a plastic bag in his hold. He had a beanie-like hat on and it covered his dark black hair. A tight smile was on his lips when he says hello to Annie. Annie returns it lightly and returns the greeting before she looks over at Bertholdt. 

Following her gaze, Father looks over at him and then his smile softens. Without taking off his boots, which is shocking, he approaches Bertholdt and pulls him into a hug. Speechless, Bertholdt makes a noise of surprise, and then nervously returns it. It only lasted a moment.

“Welcome home, Bertholdt”, Father's low voice fills his ear, and then he pulls away. Bertholdt nods jerkily and then gives a nervous smile. His dad wasn't really that gruff or intimidating. In fact, he wasn't that much at all. He was a little bigger than Bertholdt, a little more muscular, but he wasn't taller. His face had more lines in it than Bertholdt recalled. More stress lines across his forehead. 

“Um, its good to be back”, Bertholdt says, looking into Father's dark brown eyes (Bertholdt earned his olive green eyes from his mother), and then relaxes a little. He didn't expect a warm welcome, honestly. Father pulls off his hat, revealing his messy black locks, and then turns to walk back to the entrance. He asks Annie to take the bag, and she obliges before Father began to pull of his coat and boots. 

“Have you two been waiting long?” Father asks as he hangs his coat onto the antler hook. Annie answers before Bertholdt could.

“We recently arrived.”

“That's good. You two hungry at all?” 

Bertholdt wonders why he's in such a good mood. But he's glad either way, no matter the reason. He watches from the armrest of the couch as Father takes the bag from Annie, and walks into the kitchen. Annie gives Bertholdt a look with a raised brow, and then approaches him at the couch.

“We ate before coming”, Annie calls, and then grabs Bertholdt's hand. Bertholdt looks down at her silently as she gives him a light, encouraging smile. Bertholdt gazes at her and then nods. Releasing his hand, Annie turns to approach Father in the kitchen. She asks how he's been and all that, while Bertholdt follows quietly, and stands by the table. He feels slightly awkward, unsure of what to do. But eventually, his dad announces that _he_ intends to eat, so they should help him with that.

So Bertholdt assists his dad by skinning and cutting a potato into quarters, as Annie sets the table for one. Annie and his dad mostly chat, but occasionally his dad would ask him questions about college, or about little things, mainly to continue the conversation. Bertholdt feels more at ease this way.

 

Annie had stayed for another two hours, before she claims she needs to head back, and then says goodbye to both of them, gives Bertholdt a light hug, before leaving in her Volvo. Father comments that she was a good friend, a strong woman, and that she would be a perfect daughter-in-law. Bertholdt felt uncomfortable at that, and escaped into his bedroom. 

It was in the middle of the day by then, so he had some time to kill. If his dad wanted him to help with chores or anything, he could just call him down. For the next three hours, Bertholdt plays on his Nintendo 64, reads, and aimlessly watches one of his documentaries as he texts Annie. Then at dinner time, his dad calls him down, and they prepare the meal together. While his dad had gutted the fish, Bertholdt set the table and chopped up vegetables for the salad. It reminded him of the time before he left for college. 

It was a quarter before eight when Bertholdt returns to his bedroom after eating and cleaning up with his dad. He made sure to feed Hans before leaving, though. Typically, Father would go into his own room after dinner, as well. Bertholdt always knew they didn't have the type of relationship where they talked with each other for enjoyment or bonding. It was usually idle chat or mandatory things to mention or ask. Bertholdt didn't mind it, honestly. As long as his dad was respectful and understanding, Bertholdt didn't care what they talked about or how much they didn't talk. Bertholdt was afraid his dad would yell at him like he would at his mom. But it was a rare occurrence.

Bertholdt didn't mind coming back home. Even if his home in itself made him uncomfortable or sometimes afraid, nothing made him feel worse than being surrounded by memories of his childhood. And the pictures of his mother on the walls weren't entirely soothing, either. That's why Bertholdt preferred being holed up in his room. His dad wouldn't let go, so ultimately, neither would Bertholdt. But he didn't mind coming home, because it was better than being alone at the dorm back at Uni.

 

Even when the sky was a pitch black outside and the stars were out, with the sounds of the house settling and Hans moving about noisily in his cage, Bertholdt still could not grasp sleep. He stared over at the window across from where he lay, curled in a ball under his quilt, and thought about everything he didn't want to think about. His mother, her death, the blame. He still wasn't able to reach the stage in moving on where he thought of her fondly, rather than with regret or sadness. And its been many years since her death.

The only thing that distracted him from his suffocating thoughts was the sudden vibration from his phone on the small table behind his head at the headboard of his bed. Sitting up slowly, he reaches past the short headboard to grab his phone, the screen emitting a bright light into the room with the notification of a text message. 

Squinting through the blinding light in the darkness, he opens it. Glancing at the hour in the corner of the phone's screen, it read 10:42. He blinks a few times to get used to the brightness, before reading it. Who would text him at a late hour?

“ _sorry if you're trying to sleep rn, I just wanted to say hi. Ask how you're doing. Is your ferret doing alright, too?_ ”

It was from Reiner. Smiling, Bertholdt re-reads the text. Then he laughs quietly, before he opens a new text and begins to reply.

“ _Trying, is the key word there. Hello, Reiner. I'm doing okay. And yes, Hans is doing well. What about you? And your dog?_ ”

He sends it with a giddiness blooming in his chest. His smile extends and then he plops back down onto his bed. He pulls the blanket over his head to hide the bright light of the phone, and stares at it in his hands among the darkness. He idly scrolls through the previous text conversation, re-reading what's been sent. It takes a few minutes to get a reply, but he does receive one in the end, and that's what matters.

“ _Hans is a cool name for a ferret. I'm fine, and so is Ginger. She's actually laying on me rn. Im gonna pass out its so warm. And im so stuffed my mom basically shoved food down my throat. I swear shes obsessed with cooking me food. That was what she was so excited about upon my return, im telling you. Whats it like back at home? Im dying because my dad wont get off my ass and my mom is smothering me_ ”

Bertholdt laughs. It seems to him Reiner is excited to text him, because he's blabbering again, and he blabbers when he's excited. He smiles softly as he quietly replies.

“ _What breed is Ginger? And I'm sure your mother has good intentions. She probably knows what its like living off of noodle cups during college. My home is the same as ever. Nothing really different. It was nice seeing Hans again. Annie stayed for a while, which was nice._ ”

“ _she's a golden retriever. Shes like a breathing blanket, laying on me like this. Wait she just got up. Augh she stepped on my stomach. That hurt. Now shes hiding from my mom's cat. Poor bby is always terrorized by the damn cat. I hate the cat. It stinks up the place and scratches me all the time. Also I think it being the same could be a good thing yknow? Change isn't always good. And you're that close with annie?? for her to stay at your house? Dang. Tell your dad I said hi sometime k?_ ”

Bertholdt sadly stares at the long text. He wants change, honestly. He knows Reiner is just offering friendly words, but it hits him in a bad way rather than a positive way. It reminds him of unpleasant things, and it makes Bertholdt's chest tighten. He attempts to disregard it. Then he's given another text. Except, its a photo. He opens it curiously.

It was a dog. It seems that Reiner was able to take a picture before Ginger ran from the cat. The picture was of a pale blonde haired dog draped over him, its long hair splayed across his broad chest and abdomen. Bertholdt stared more at Reiner's clothed chest (his shirt was rather tight, actually) and his muscular arm that was resting over the dog's side, rather than the topic of the photo. He blushes a little, too.

“ _she's pretty. How old is she?_ ”

“ _four_ ”

“ _That's not too old._ ”

“ _yeah...it sucks how dogs dont live that long, though._ ”

“ _Well, don't think of it just yet. She has many more years to live, so focus on that instead_ ”

Bertholdt smiles at the next text he receives from Reiner.

“ _so are you the kinda person that thinks the glass is half-full, rather than half-empty?_ ”

“ _No. But I do think that way, when it comes to people I care about._ ” 

Bertholdt knows that was a bit reckless and, frankly, suggestive, but it was the truth. He didn't want Reiner to dwell over his dog's inevitable death, but rather, it's inevitable enjoyment of life. 

“ _Oh, I see. You're a good guy, Bertl_ ”

Again, Bertholdt blushes.

“ _I don't think so..but whatever you say I guess. You're not so bad yourself_ ”

“ _I really think you're awesome, tho. I mean. Yeah. Not to be gay or anything. You're a good friend._ ”

Bertholdt laughs a little bit. Reiner sounded like he was embarrassed. He stares at that text for a minute. He isn't sure how to reply at first. He stares, blushing, and then types up a reply.

“ _you, too. I should go to bed now, though. Sleep well Reiner._ ”

He hesitates for a moment, looking at the text conversation with a red face. In that hesitation, he's given a reply almost instantly.

“ _night. Text me in the morning, k?_ ”

Bertholdt giggles to himself, feeling giddy like a stupid high school girl with a crush, and hurriedly replies.

“ _okay._ ”

With that, he puts his phone on sleep, pulls down his blanket from over his head to set his phone on his side table, and then situates himself to a comfortable sleeping position. With a smile, he closes his eyes and lets his thoughts drift. Admittedly, they drift to day dreaming of Reiner. It keeps him up for another thirty minutes, fantasizing about the blond boy, until the unconsciousness claims him with a comfortable sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** More insight on Bertholdt's family I suppose. I felt kind of weird including his dad, but I always feel weird including the parents, so whatever. This is kind of how I would envision his dad.


	20. Chapter 20

At seven in the morning, the sun was in the sky, with a litter of clouds lingering nearby. Looking out the window in the kitchen, Bertholdt sits at the dining table with his father, head propped in a hand. He thinks that maybe it would be warmer today. He hears the noises of his father eating, while he doesn't really have an appetite himself. He didn't grab much anyways. Just a little bit of scrambled eggs, a sausage, and piece of toast. He picked at his eggs and toast a little bit. He was too nervous to eat, really.

After sitting there for awhile longer, Bertholdt only effected a small portion of his plate, whereas his father was gathering his dishes to bring to the sink. He continues to look out the window, thoughts drifting to that of another person entirely, when his father begins to clean his dishes. 

“We have chores to do, so finish up and we can get started”, his father states a moment later, so Bertholdt looks back down to his unappealing food and forces himself to finish it all. He feels something unpleasant in his stomach, but he neglects it, stands, and gathers his dishes. 

 

They spend about two hours with the chores. Bertholdt is used to it though, despite not having to deal with the daily work for a few months. They gather firewood from the nearby forest, and set up some snare loops on the rabbit trail. Then they do some little things like do a quick clean of the house and prepare the furnace. Bertholdt was glad when he was given a break and escapes into his bedroom. It was almost ten in the morning by then.

He sends a text to Reiner, like he had been asked.

“ _Hi. I hope you're awake by now._ ”

After sending it to Reiner, he sighs and leans against the wall beside his bed. He stares up at the ceiling for a mere moment, and then his phone vibrates in his grasp. He drops his gaze down to it, and opens the text with anticipation coiling inside.

“ _morning, bertl. Just got out of the shower so you texted me at the right time. My parents are out, so I was thinking I could call instead of text?_ ”

At first, Bertholdt pictures Reiner in the shower, and then he becomes bewildered. Bertholdt stares at the text with a blank expression. Why would Reiner want to call him? They could easily talk through text. Bertholdt wouldn't even want his dad to overhear his conversation. But before he could respond, Reiner's contact lights up on the screen, and loud vibrations from his phone begin. Shit.

He scrambles up and runs out to the stairs. They creak loudly under his feet as he hurries down the staircase, towards the entrance. Hans moves about noisily in his cage, stirred on by the excitement going on, but Bertholdt is too distracted to notice. Bertholdt swipes to answer the call, and presses it to his ear.

“Idiot, don't call randomly like that! Why would you offer and then just do it anyways? Jeez, let me just put on my shoes”, Bertholdt hurriedly says in a hushed voice, grabbing his coat from the antler coat hanger, before he works on tugging it on with a single hand. Without waiting for a reply from Reiner, he sets the phone down on the floor and opens the coat closet to grab his shoes.

He quickly pulls them on, and without bothering to tie them, grabs his phone, stands and opens the door. He paces out into the chilly air, and quietly shuts the door behind him. Returning the phone to his ear, he hurries towards the row of trees by the side of their house, pulling his coat tighter around himself. The first thing he hears is quiet laughter from Reiner. 

“Alright, alright, I'm sorry. I'm assuming you just left your house?”

“Yeah”, Bertholdt answers, a little breathless, as he slinks into the small forest by their house. He glances back occasionally, and when he feels comfortable enough with the distance, he sits down against a tree, it's sturdy trunk supporting his back. He briefly worries if its too early for hibernation, but then Reiner's voice reins his attention back in.

“Did you sleep well?”

Smiling softly, Bertholdt's cheeks warm a little.

“Yes. And you?”

“Not really...um, I couldn't fall asleep and by the time I did, it was almost one in the morning.”

“Oh. That sucks.”

“Yeah.”

Bertholdt remains silent for a moment, listening to Reiner breathe, and lightly nibbles on his fingernail. He looks at the scenery of the forest around him, keeping an eye out for any animals. Only darkly colored nature surrounds him. The air is frigid and chilly around him. His cheeks are growing progressively colder, but its not troublesome. He's glad he grabbed his coat. The mossy forest floor under him is soft, so it doesn't hurt to sit down.

“Where did you go to when I called you?”

Bertholdt jerk backs to the conversation, looking away from the morning dew decorating a spider's web by his side.

“I went into the forest by my home.”

“You live next to a forest?”

“Yeah. I think I told you we live out of town.”

“Yeah, you did. You have reception there?”

Bertholdt laughs quietly and shakes his head. He's been asked that before.

“Yes, there's a gas station nearby, and one or two other houses, so reception would be needed. We're not in the middle of nowhere.”

“Oh, I see.”

Pausing, Bertholdt realizes that Reiner seems more mellow than usual. In fact, he's talking in a gentler and lower tone than usual. Its kind of soothing so Bertholdt hadn't noticed. He licks his cold lips and tries to think of something to talk about. Its been a few days since the beginning of the break, and Bertholdt endlessly thought of Reiner. Yet he didn't know what to say to him when given the chance, for them to talk alone, without any disruptions. They had more _privacy_. It was strange. 

They did have privacy in the dorm room, but it was different. Bertholdt was completely alone out here, and Reiner was supposedly alone at his house, with his parents gone. There weren't any other people that could barge in or disrupt them or anything. It was nerve-racking, and it made Bertholdt's mind go blank. 

They listened to each other breathe for almost a minute, before Reiner breaks the silence.

“Sometime, I would like to hide in that forest with you. It would be nice, huh?”

Bertholdt blushes deeply, and opens his mouth, stunned, and then dumbly closes it. He tries to think of something to say. Instead, he stupidly blurts out what passed through his thoughts.

“Are you flirting with me, Reiner?”

There was a long moment of silence. Too long.

“What? I'm just saying I would like to see the forest that you're talking about, y'know? Jeez.”

Bertholdt runs his hand shakily over his red face and exhales. He lightly smacks a fist against his forehead, cursing at himself for saying a stupid thing like that. Then he curls his hand over the back of his neck and replies.

“Oh. Yeah, I mean, we could do that during summer break or whatever. And...maybe I could visit your place too.”

“Sounds like a plan!”

Bertholdt smiles lightly and then it falls silent once more. Quietly, Bertholdt sighs as he looks up at the bare branches of the trees. He hears Reiner breathe and its kind of soothing. It makes Bertholdt feel a comfortable warmth inside. He hums quietly, resting his head back against the tree.

“This is kind of weird, I never talked to you on the phone before.”

Reiner speaks then, and it makes Bertholdt laugh quietly. 

“I thought so at first, but its not so bad. You're not as infuriating if I can't see your face.”

“Hey, rude.”

That makes Bertholdt laugh aloud lightly, and it earns some chuckles from Reiner as well. A moment of silence passes once more. There was an unspoken agreement that it was okay, that it was comfortable and nice just to enjoy the silence and the privacy they both share. But alas, Bertholdt becomes too cold to stay out much longer. He's been sitting here for about ten minutes now, and his body was growing cold and stiff.

“I should go in before my fingers fall off”, Bertholdt muses and then says softly, “It was nice talking to you again, Reiner. Maybe we could do this later, too. Sorry I couldn't talk long.” He hears a gentle exhale from the other end.

“Yeah. I'll text you, then.”

“Bye, Reiner”, Bertholdt says, eyes falling a little, feeling his chest tighten with a strange feeling. It was a mixture of disappointment and adoration. Its silent for a mere second, and then Reiner speaks again.

“Talk to you later, Bertl.”

It makes Bertholdt's lip twitch with a smile. He then pulls the phone from his ear and ends the call. He stares at his phone in his hand for a moment, processing what just happened. He blushes a little, and stands from where he sat against the tree. 

 

When he returns to the house, he takes off his shoes and coat with sluggish movements, a little dazed. After he hangs his coat on the antler hanger, he stands there for a moment, phone clutched in one hand, with his other lifted to his lips to gently bite at his fingertips as he thinks deeply, eyes distant. Then he processes he was gnawing at his fingers absentmindedly, and drops his hand. He shakes his head as he turns to walk over to the ferret cage. Bertholdt looks down at Hans drinking from his water dispenser, a light smile drifting over his lips, thoughts growing distant once again.

After Hans was done drinking, he opens the door and reaches in to gently pull him out. Clutching him in his arms, he turns and approaches the staircase, passing the furnace and kitchen along the way. The steps creak softly under his feet as he ascends them. He hums softly to Hans, stroking his fingers over his soft head as he enters the bathroom on the second floor. He needed to give him a bath. 

So after locking the door behind himself, he keeps Hans on his shoulder as he starts to fill the sink with warm water. As the water slowly rises, Bertholdt pries Hans off his shoulder and checks his teeth. Then Hans begins to bite at his finger and it makes Bertholdt giggle a little. After checking the temperature of the water, he dips Hans into it. Hans never had a problem with bathing, so he only sits in the lukewarm water, latched onto the sleeve of Bertholdt's sweater as Bertholdt digs the ferret shampoo out of the cabinet. 

Admittedly, Bertholdt daydreams about Reiner with a lazy smile on his lips as he rubs a dollop of the shampoo into Hans' coat. He gives slow rubs into his ferret with the suds of the shampoo as he pictures himself and Reiner walking together along the rabbit trail in the forest. When Hans bites on his finger lightly, it jerks Bertholdt out of his imagination and then he attends to scrubbing Hans' head and behind his ears and on his belly. 

For the next ten minutes, he scrubs at Hans' back and chest. The time goes by as he drifts back into his fantasies. When the water goes cold, he realizes he was spending too much time with this. So he rinses Hans off, and then drains the sink. He wraps a hand towel around Hans and rubs it over the ferret. Hans complains and tries to wiggle out, but Bertholdt catches him each time before he makes it out. Once Hans is as dry as he could be with the use of a towel, Bertholdt runs his fingernails gently over his coat, attempting to tame the hairs. 

Then Hans hurriedly crawls up his arm and rests on Bertholdt's shoulder, claiming his usual spot. He was obviously through with the grooming. Bertholdt laughs and then throws the hand towel into the laundry hamper. Leaving the bathroom, he turns the corner to begin down the staircase. 

Even when he puts Hans back into his cage, and returns to his bedroom, Bertholdt still has his thoughts flooded with Reiner. Laying back in his bed, he wonders if they could talk on the phone more often. Reiner seemed okay with it. Maybe they could talk again tomorrow. Bertholdt smiles at the thought. 

\----------

Three days later, his dad brings in a six foot tree. So, Bertholdt spends about an hour and a half cleaning up the stray small branches and pine needles, as well as decorating the tree with the bland decorations his dad bothered saving. It wasn't much, but Bertholdt appreciated the thought. A mediocre tree was better than no tree. 

When he returns to his bedroom following the midday meal, after cleaning the dishes with his dad, he finds that he has a few texts from Reiner. He grins, shuts the door behind him, and takes a seat on his bed. With a giddiness, he opens the texts 

“ _hey, you up yet? Good morning!!_ ”

“ _are you busy? Im not, and im bored. Its stupid how we have a few weeks off for break and im already bored. Maybe I could hang with connie or s/t, but I would rather talk to you._ ”

“ _Hey, Bertl. Heeeyyyy_ ”

Laughing quietly to himself, Bertholdt feels his cheeks flush and he smiles softly. Bringing his knees up, he props his hands against them as he types up a reply. 

“ _Sorry, sorry. I was busy. How did you sleep?_ ”

The reply he receives is almost instant. It surprises him slightly, but its makes him feel happy. He can't stop smiling as reads it.

“ _I slept well, and u? What did you dream about?_ ”

“ _That's good! I slept fine. I actually dreamed that we were sharing coffee..it was strange. What a dumb dream, huh?_ ”

He actually tells Reiner the truth. He did honestly dream about Reiner, that they were sharing coffee and sitting together in what Bertholdt dimly remembers to be the Starbucks back at the campus. Sometimes, Bertholdt wonders how his dreams can be so precise and accurate. But he does know he was with Reiner in his dream. 

He feels anxious for the reply. Reiner does reply within a moment.

“ _Wow, really? that is weird. also hey could I call you again?_ ”

Grinning, Bertholdt instantly stands as he types up a reply.

“ _Of course, let me just get ready first, to go outside. I'll call you._ ”

He puts his phone in his jean's pocket, and then grabs his gloves and earmuffs off his dresser.

They've been talking for the past few days, ever since Reiner first called him. Each time, Bertholdt would go out to the forest and sit in that same place. It was really nice, because Bertholdt felt like he was understanding Reiner more this way. With this privacy they had, there weren't any masks or forts up. Reiner probably was more himself because he didn't have to be this specific way around his other friends. Whenever Reiner's family would be at home, he would leave the house as well. At least, that's what Reiner had told him before. 

As Bertholdt was pulling on his boots, he grows a little nervous and blushes deeply. He feels his face grow warm as he ties his shoes. After pulling on his coat and putting his earmuffs on, he leaves the house. With his gloves clutched in one hand, he pulls out his phone with the other and opens Reiner's contact. He sends a call through. As he walks over to the forest, he looks up at the sky. The sun is still out, behind a thick veil of clouds, so he didn't have to worry about it getting dark too soon.

Reiner answers after two rings. 

“Bertholdt!”, Reiner answers brightly, and it makes Bertholdt smile shyly. The fallen leaves and twigs crunch under Bertholdt's steps as he hurries over to his usual place. “Hi, Reiner”, Bertholdt quietly greets as he takes a careful seat on the mossy floor, where the leaves hadn't fallen. Leaning against the tree, he sighs lightly and works on pulling his gloves over his hands as he cradles his phone between his shoulder and cheek. 

“Is it cold out there today? If its too cold, we don't have to talk if you don't want to.”

Laughing a little bit, Bertholdt shakes his head despite the fact Reiner couldn't see. He raises his gloved hand to clutch his phone from where it resided between his shoulder and cheek, and adjusts himself against the tree. 

“No, its fine. I want to talk, anyways.”

Not to mention, Bertholdt had grown more confident as they talked more and more. He's gotten used to Reiner somewhat, so he wasn't as hesitant or cautious as before. Admittedly, he trusted Reiner. Sometimes, he was dubious to trusting others, but Reiner was definitely a good friend. 

“Oh, okay. I just don't want to keep you out for too long, I wouldn't want my Bertl getting cold just to talk.”

Okay, that makes Bertholdt blush a deep red. He sputters a little, and Reiner's laughter follows. Sighing, Bertholdt shakes his head and rubs at the bridge of his nose, trying to shake off his embarrassment and silent glee. Damn it, Reiner was messing with him.

“S-shut up, you idiot. Jeez. I'm fine.”

More quiet laughter emits from Reiner.

“Are you in your room?” Bertholdt asks quietly, staring down at the mess of leaves and sticks at his feet. He hears soft breathing through the other end.

“No. I went outside. Hey, do you see the sun at all?”

Blinking, Bertholdt thinks that is a strange thing to ask. He peeks through the trees up at the sky, glancing around for said star. He hums and is about to say no, but the clouds move over a little, and the blinding rays fall down.

“Oh! Yes, I see it.”

“Ah, yeah, I just saw it too. I guess we're looking at the same thing, huh? Yet we're so far away from each other. Isn't that weird?” Reiner's voice says softly into his ear, and it sends a nice feeling that coils around Bertholdt's heart with a tight grasp that refuses to let go. Bertholdt lets out a quiet, shaky breath and keeps his eyes fixed on the spot where the sun was shielded by the clouds.

“Yeah.”

Bertholdt feels a crushing amount of adoration and comfort just then and it makes him smile gently, eyes still raised to the spot. He laughs lightly.

“What are you laughing for?”

“I'm just thinking you're being really sappy right now. Isn't that kind of a weird thing to say?”

Reiner huffs.

“I'm just saying! You know what I mean, right?” 

Bertholdt's smile softens and he nods.

“Yes, I know what you mean.”

Reiner is quiet then, and Bertholdt doesn't speak either. A long minute of silence passes. Although, the silence seems heavier this time to Bertholdt. Like maybe both of them had things to say, but they were too afraid to speak them. Bertholdt drops his eyes to his lap and fiddles with the hem of his coat as he waits for Reiner to say something. Just as Bertholdt starts to grow nervous, Reiner speaks again.

“I miss you”, he says, and it makes Bertholdt's mouth literally fall open in surprise. Then a moment later, Reiner catches himself.

“I..I mean like, I miss messing with you. Teasing you. 'Cause I get so bored when I don't have someone to poke at, y'know?”

Blushing as red as a rose, Bertholdt is speechless. Reiner was just digging himself a bigger hole, but Bertholdt was still appalled over what he just said. Even if he did mean it in that way, it still made Bertholdt's heart race and his skin break out in a nervous sweat. He swallows thickly.

“O-oh...me too.”

“But you don't even tease me. That much.”

“No, I miss you.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Bertholdt's face is almost literally on fire. He raises his knees and hides his face behind them. He curls his arm around his shins and almost groans from his embarrassment. He doesn't know how he managed to say that without stuttering, but he did. He wants Reiner to know, too.

“Well, I'm glad that you like my company then, since you always moan about how annoying I am.”

Bertholdt smacks a hand over his forehead. Reiner _so_ chose those words on purpose! With his face burning, Bertholdt nearly barks at him that he's just making him more flustered. Reiner was probably aware already. 

“Idiot..”, Bertholdt hisses and is given chuckles in reply. They grow quiet then, and Bertholdt's face eventually cools in the chilly air. The silence seemed much more thicker this time, than before. Bertholdt felt suffocated with what he wanted to say. That was one small obstacle that he just overcame, telling Reiner the truth. He did miss Reiner. With triumphing that obstacle, Bertholdt feels like being more honest. Reiner didn't seem offended by his words, so maybe..

He feels that its the right time. And this will probably be the time to say it. If they were face to face, there was no way Bertholdt could have said what he just said. And what he intends to say. So he swallows down the lump in his throat, ignores the twisting nervous feeling in his stomach, and shakily exhales.

“Reiner..can I be honest with you?”

There is a long pause of silence, and Bertholdt pulls his phone away to check if the call was still going. It was. Pressing it back to his ear, he hears Reiner speak up.

“Yeah, go ahead.”

Worrying at his bottom lip, Bertholdt re-considers it. If he were to tell Reiner the truth, it could either potentially ruin their close friendship...or escalate it, by some chance Reiner would be okay with it. Bertholdt lifts his gloved hand and attempts to bite at his fingertips, but when he realizes he's biting at wool, he drops his hand and instead fidgets with his coat again. 

“Um..”, he begins nervously, voice quiet, and then exhales deeply. He urges himself to just say it, say it, say it. He hears Reiner breathe softly through the phone.

“What is it, Bertl? You know you can trust me, right?”

Bertholdt nods jerkily and rubs at his sweaty forehead with his gloved hand. He couldn't go back now, yet he was so god damn nervous. What if Reiner was totally disgusted and just turned away from him? Forever? Reiner wouldn't be offended because his gay friend is into him, right? Is he that kind of person? 

“N-nevermind...”, Bertholdt miserably mumbles. The thought of Reiner leaving him was too hard to swallow. He couldn't risk their friendship just because of his crush on the other. He didn't have to let Reiner know. It could be a secret. For how long it needed to be. 

“No, no, you can't just do that. Tell me! You don't have to worry.”

Bertholdt wishes that were true. He wonders if its true. He doesn't have to stress over it, does he? He trusts Reiner. If Reiner doesn't like the truth, he could just simply let Bertholdt know, and they could continue their friendship like it was nothing. Bertholdt prays Reiner is that understanding and accepting as he sucks in a breath and quietly speaks.

“I've kind of had a thing for you...for a while now. Um. Sorry.” 

He lets out a heavy exhale at the confession and feels a weight lift off his shoulders momentarily. But Reiner's silence weighs on him. As each second passes, Bertholdt's dread builds and builds. Then he hears Reiner let out a breath and then a light laugh.

“Oh, I see. I...I'm actually kind of relieved.”

Bertholdt, stunned, lifts his head from behind his knees and stares at the trees across from him with raised eyebrows. The chilly air cools his warm face as he processes this.

“Wait, what?”

“I'm into you, too. It was probably obvious.”

_What?_ Bertholdt mouths what he fails to say aloud, and feels his heart thump heavily in his chest. He feels his hands grow sweaty in his gloves. Licking at his lips nervously, Bertholdt clears his throat.

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean like...I guess you kind of stirred up an interest from me. A-attraction, I guess. Yeah.”

Bertholdt blinks. He doesn't know what to say. He's utterly shocked, still. He remains quiet, wildly wondering how the hell someone as straight as Reiner could be interested in a lame guy like Bertholdt. What does he mean by attraction, though? There were different types of attraction. Just as he was going to ask this, Reiner speaks before he could.

“So...what now? Now that...now that we know?”

Bertholdt pauses, and considers this. That was a good question. 

What now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 


	21. Chapter 21

Continuous low thumps break the silence repeatedly each time the small rubber ball hits against the wall. Staring upwards towards the spot where said ball deflected off the wall of his bedroom, Reiner's impatience was expanding as he threw his ball against the wall over and over again. With his other arm tucked behind his head, Reiner catches and throws the ball as his thoughts go on a continuous loop. A loop of 'Why is Bertholdt taking so long to reply to my texts?', 'Did something I say upset him?', and 'I wonder what he's doing right now'. Endless worries and wonders that would not just leave him the hell alone.

After about his 150th throw, Reiner catches the ball and chucks it at his TV in annoyance. It bounces off the corner of the TV, and makes it wobble. Reiner isn't concerned. He watches as the TV settles and the ball rolls across his carpet. He's not frustrated at Bertholdt. Not in the least. He's just angered at his own naivete. How could he be so stupid as to blurt that out? Maybe Bertholdt was upset because of what Reiner said..

Of course, due to the neglect of Bertholdt, his thoughts spiral out of control and create ridiculous notions. 

With a heavy sigh, Reiner rolls over and peeks over the side of his bed. Lazily, his arm swoops down and he pushes at the ball nearby with his fingers. He rolls it around under his fingers as he stares, and his thoughts drift back to the taller boy. He wonders what Bertholdt meant when he said he had a thing for him. What kind of thing, though? Reiner ponders over it. He could ask Bertholdt, but he doesn't want to fluster him any further, no matter how amusing (and cute) it is. He could just see how this thing goes. Well, so far its not going at all, but when they meet again at Uni, that might change.

The thought of that blooms butterflies in Reiner's stomach. What would happen then? It was all out now, their attraction to each other. One of them only had to make a move. And if Reiner knew Bertholdt, he knew he wasn't going to be the one to do it.

So, draped over his bed, Reiner fiddles with the ball as he decides when they get back, he was definitely going to do something about it.

 

After their equal confessions, neither Bertholdt or Reiner knew what to do or say. In the end, Bertholdt stated as much and Reiner offered they could talk about it later. Bertholdt had been quick to agree with that, before he hurriedly gave an excuse to end the call. Reiner knew he was only embarrassed, but he hadn't texted or called back in almost two days. Maybe he was just thinking about it. 

Sighing, Reiner sits upright, and leans back against the wall to the side of his bed. He crosses his legs and stares out the window across from his bed. It was dark outside. With the moon out and the ominous clouds littering the sky, Reiner feels melancholy creep into him. With his lamp lighting the room, it casts a calming glow within. He stares out the window at the clouds for a long moment. 

He doesn't let his frustration and melancholy absorb him though. Instead, he grabs his iPod off his nightstand, puts in the ear buds, lays down, and goes to his music library to start playing some Studio Killers. It was a guilty pleasure band that he listened to whenever he wanted to feel better. He wouldn't ever mention it to his friends, though. There were some things they didn't need to know about.

After listening to a few songs on the album, staring out the window from his bed, resting on his side, Reiner grows sleepy. His eyelids weigh down and eventually he succumbs from their coaxing and lets his mind drift. The music fills his ears. Just as he's about to fall asleep, he tiredly raises an arm and reaches over to turn off his lamp with a click. The room is bathed in darkness that is very much welcomed. 

 

In the morning, he wakes up to a rain storm, a dead iPod, and an intense need to piss. 

With a groan, Reiner sits up and plucks his ear buds out. Sluggishly, he slips out of his room clad in his white t-shirt and sweatpants, with a messy head of hair. He rubs at his eyes as he walks over to the bathroom a few doors down beside the staircase.

Once inside, he relieves his bladder, and then decides he may as well take a shower before he forgets to. So, after pulling his shirt over his head and stepping out of his sweatpants and underwear, he gets in the shower and starts the spray. He leaps back and curses aloud when the cold water attacks him. He always forgets to warm the water first! Sighing, he cautiously reaches a hand out and touches the spray. Its lukewarm now so he steps under it once more. He feels the water travel through his hair and down his neck and back. With contentment, he grows lax under the warm spray.

First, he briefly washes his hair and then takes his poof ball thing (Reiner always wondered what the proper term for that thing was) from the built-in shelf to begin washing his body. He doesn't spend too much time with it. He wonders if Bertholdt texted back yet, so he only wanted to get out as soon as possible to check.

Once he rinses off the suds from his skin, he turns off the shower and steps out. Grabbing a towel, he rubs it over his short hair, face, and his torso before he wraps it around his lower half. Bundling his clothes in his arms, he leaves the bathroom and escapes into his bedroom. Once inside, he drops his clothes and takes a seat on his bed. Retrieving his phone from his nightstand, he unlocks it and notices that, in fact, Bertholdt had replied.

Sitting on his bed in only a towel around his waist, Reiner grins brightly and hurries to open it. 

“ _Sorry for the late replies. My dad is keeping me busy. You don't need to apologize for that, Reiner, I mean..I'm kind of glad you told me._ ”

Reiner feels relief. He worried endlessly if he was too blunt or sudden. The text was sent just as he got in the shower, so he still has time for it to be considered acceptably late. He begins to reply with quick swipes of his thumbs.

“ _Ok. Thats good. I thought I upset u or something. So are we gonna address it or_ ”

After sending it, he tosses it aside on his bed and stands. He knows Bertholdt will take a moment to reply, so he begins to get dressed for the day.

Once in a pair of jeans and a long sleeved t-shirt, he takes a seat on his bed once more and opens his phone. It had vibrated when he was getting dressed, so he knows Bertholdt replied. He pulls up the text and reads it.

“ _Jeez, you're so blunt. I would rather not, to be honest. But if you really want to...I guess we could. What is there to even address?_ ”

“ _what to do from this point on, but we dont have to discuss it. We can let it happen however it will happen_ ”, Reiner texts back, a little disappointed, but he respects Bertholdt's wishes. Reiner doesn't care, as long as he can still talk to the other. Sighing, he leans back against the wall and closes his eyes. Then he processes his apparent hunger, and gets up to meander downstairs, absentmindedly discarding his phone to his side on the bed.

In the kitchen, his mom is looking through a fashion magazine on the dining table. She looks up past her long honey colored hair and gives Reiner a bright smile that reveals the small gap between her teeth that she always flustered over. Reiner offers a weak smile before he approaches the fridge.

“Did you just get up, Reiner? Are you hungry?”

“Obviously, should be the answer to the both of those questions.”

He hears his mom chuckle and then the scraping of her chair on the floor follows. Reiner rolls his eyes, knowing what's coming. His mom walks around the island in the kitchen and nudges her son aside to get to the fridge.

“Take a seat, I'll make you some breakfast.”

“Alright, alright”, Reiner groans and leaves the kitchen area to claim a seat at the table with a squeak of his chair. He hears his mom move about and take out some cooking tools noisily. Within a few minutes, he hears sizzling. 

“Did you sleep well, honey?”, his mom calls, and Reiner props his head in a hand, elbow resting on the table. 

“Yeah”, he answers, looking over at her slender back. Her hair was now swept up into a ponytail, to prevent any stray hairs from mixing into the food, no doubt. She was about forty now. Reiner wonders if she's happy. His dad is always out on business trips, so its usually just his mother, himself, and his little brother. Reiner didn't really mind. His dad usually nagged him anyways. But he couldn't imagine barely seeing your marriage partner. He would be out for weeks, and stay for a single week, and then he would be gone again. It was like he preferred not being at the house. 

It frustrated Reiner, only because of his mother though. He didn't like his father treating her that way, as if she wasn't a concern. Reiner did mention it before, but his dad just snapped at him that he should try raising a family, that he should earn the money of the family if he was so concerned over it. Of course, his dad mentioned it to his mom, and so his mom had A Talk with him (as she would call it), and told him that she isn't bothered by it, that she understands its for the family.

As Reiner thinks about this, his mom finishes up with preparing his breakfast. He hears her as she scrapes up some food from the pan. Her feet are quiet on the floor as she makes her way over to the table with a light smile upon her lips. She sets a plate of scrambled eggs, bacon, sourdough bread, and fruit before him. Reiner thanks her, gives her a sweet smile, and takes the utensils from her. 

“You are welcome”, she replies with a smile, and then turns to walk back into the kitchen, asking, “What would you like to drink?”

“Uh, orange juice please. Thanks, mom.”

As she opens the cabinet to retrieve a glass, Reiner plops some of the eggs onto his toast and takes a bite. Once she sets a glass full of OJ before him, he looks up at her with a mouthful of eggs and toast and gives her a strained smile. She pats him on the shoulder, and then she takes a seat across from him to return to her magazine. Reiner is really grateful of his mother. 

 

After he finishes eating and helping his mother with cleaning the dishes, he gives her a sideways hug, grimaces at her kiss to the cheek, and realizes he left his phone on his bed. So he escapes his mother's clutches and hurries up the staircase. He dives onto the bed for his phone when he makes it into the privacy of his room.

There were two texts.

“ _I would prefer it that way. And I would rather not talk on the phone today because its storming and I don't feel like getting wet. My dad would want me inside anyways. We can talk through text though._ ”

And then, “ _Reiner? Are you there?_ ”

Reiner actually blushes over Bertholdt's choice of words. Its totally in a different context, but sometimes he has a perverted mind. He brushes it off and gets to replying.

“ _Sorry, had breakfast. And thats cool. So how did u sleep? Got any pains from sleeping in a weird ass position?_ ”

He gets a reply within a minute.

“ _I slept fine. And no, I don't. My body has gotten used to my habit long ago._ ”

Reiner smiles a little. Then he gets another text.

“ _I'm still getting used to the fact Christmas is in three days._ ”

“ _Yeah, same. We get back to Uni on the fifth right?_ ”

“ _Yes._ ”

“ _I look forward to it_ ”, Reiner texts back with an implication that Bertholdt could obviously understand. He smirks to himself, and lays back onto his bed. Staring up at his phone raised above his head, he wonders about what he could do today. Maybe he would play some video games for a little bit and then....he doesn't know what. Because its pouring outside and getting soaked just for the sake of doing something wouldn't be worth the trouble, he doesn't have a very big selection of choices. He'll just see how the day goes.

“ _Why ever would that be?_ ”, is the reply he gets to his lame flirting.

Reiner barks out a laugh and then types out a quick reply with a grin on his lips.

“ _Because of you_ ” 

He doesn't even bother being suave. Being blunt seemed to fluster Bertholdt more anyways. He pictures Bertholdt's blushing face and startled expression with a quiet laugh. 

Then, he hears a bark throughout the house. He realizes that he hasn't even seen Ginger this morning yet. So, he gets up and leaves his room in search of her, slipping his phone into his pocket. He peeks in his parents' room, and when there's no sign of the dog, he turns to walk over to the closed door of his brother's room. He doesn't knock, he simply turns the knob and peeks in. Instantly, a mass of fur rockets out between his legs and runs off down the hallway to the staircase. Reiner whips his head around and watches as Ginger escapes down the stairs in search of his mother. 

“Damnit Reiner, why did you have to open the door?”

Averting his gaze into the room, he opens the door wider when he notices his brother sitting in the center of the room with his thick comforter wrapped around himself, his head poking out from it. His dirty blonde hair was sticking out in every direction.

“What were you doing to Ginger?” Reiner questions, giving him a look as he crossed his arms. His brother huffs, and crosses his arms as well, the blanket falling off a little now that he wasn't pulling it around himself.

“I was only trying to hold her, but she wouldn't stop moving around!”

Reiner assumes she barked because she wanted out of the messy hellhole of his brother's room. Reiner gives him an unamused look.

“You always insist she hates you. Why do you bother, then?” Reiner muses, leaning against the door frame now. His brother glares at him, and then snaps, “Why are you even in here? Get out!” Reiner grins, and then retorts, “I'm not even in your room, dumbass.”

Once his brother starts throwing the things on his floor at Reiner, Reiner escapes and shuts the door behind him before a shoe could fly to his face, the resounding smack of it coming through the other side of the door.

Reiner pulls out his phone as he begins towards the staircase. He opens the text Bertholdt sent him as he begins down the staircase. 

“ _Idiot._ ”

It makes him laugh again. He shakes his head as he puts his phone in his pocket once more, descending the staircase with creaky steps. Reiner paces through the living room, and then through the kitchen to the dining area. Approaching the dining table where his mother still sat, Reiner notices how her eyes were downcast to her magazine. When the sound of Reiner's footsteps begin on the linoleum of the kitchen floor, she looks up at him. She offers a smile and then returns to her fashion magazine that was oh so important.

Ginger was sitting at her feet, fluffy tail wiping side to side on the linoleum with an ignored eagerness. Ginger looked over at Reiner due to his approach, with her tongue lolling out of her mouth as she panted. Reiner smiles down at her, thinking she looks like a dork. He crouches down and squishes her cheeks together, making the skin and fur on her face build up. Her eyes look at him through the folds of the skin built around them. Then Reiner scratches behind her ears and under her chin, while cooing at her. She was obviously grinning. When she panted, it made her smile more apparent.

Reiner laughs at her silly face and then stands after patting her on the head.

Looking past his mother's head to the sliding door beside the dining table, he notices how heavy the sheets of rain are as they fall upon the backyard and the patio. Their trampoline held little puddles. He could barely see past the fence of their yard, the rain was so thick. He walks around the table and unlatches the sliding door to pull it open. A big gust of wind fills the dining area and it rustles his mom's magazine. She speaks a complaint but its nearly drowned out by the shrieking of the wind.

Reiner steps out onto the patio as he hears Ginger bark madly. 

Eyes raised to the dark sky, he shuts the door behind him carefully As he paces out from the comfort of the canopy above the sliding door, the wind pushes against him with a mightiness that nearly makes him stumble. Looking up to the sky, rain hits against his face. Squinting, he searches for the sun. Its all blacked out by the angry, ominous clouds. He grins.

Without a concern for the state of his clothes, he pulls out his phone. Stepping back under the canopy for the sake of the electronic, he pulls up Bertholdt's contact and sends a call through. With a teeth-revealing grin, he listens to the rings past the howling of the wind. It picks up after about four rings.

“Reiner? I told you not to call!”, he hears Bertholdt's flustered voice through the phone. He can barely pick it up past the noise, but he manages to. He laughs again, with a smile. Running a hand through his wet hair, he shouts back, “I wanted to hear your voice! Sorry Bertl! And unlike you, I am willing to stand through a fuckin' hurricane to hear it!”

Silence responds from the other end of the phone and then he hears Bertholdt's raised voice.

“ _Idiot_! Get back inside your house before you catch a cold!”, he snaps and it makes Reiner's grin extend. He sounds honestly concerned. Reiner lets out a laugh. The rain changes direction suddenly and hits against his lower half. 

“Oh, you care for my well-being? How thoughtful!”, he muses with a raised voice. He slips his free hand into his soaked jean's pocket. He hears a heaved sigh from Bertholdt.

“I'm going to smack you once we get back to the dorm, if you end up catching a cold!”, Bertholdt promises, and it makes Reiner drop his head down with chuckles. He takes out his hand to rub at his brow, wiping away the drops of rain.

“Alright, alright. I've heard your nagging voice satisfyingly enough, Bagel.”

“Oh my God, _don't_ call me that! I thought you forgot about that!”

Grinning widely, Reiner shakes his head. 

“No, there's no way I could forget about that!”

“Just hang up already, dumbass!”

“I'll text you!”, Reiner claims, and waits for an annoyed confirmation from Bertholdt, before he drops his hand with his phone and looks down to the screen as he ends the call. He grins down at the photo he used for Bertholdt's contact picture.

It was of his cute sleeping face.

With amusement, Reiner had gone back inside, stirring up more barks from Ginger and questions from his mother, leaving a trail of water as he hurries up the staircase to his bedroom, seeking dry clothes and an Xbox 360 that was so calling for him.


	22. Chapter 22

“About god damn time. You guys are such children sometimes.”

Sitting on his bed with Annie on Christmas evening, Bertholdt finally tells her about what happened between himself and Reiner. She was facing him with her legs crossed, propped back on her hands. Leaning back against the wall, Bertholdt is hiding behind his raised knees to hide his flushed cheeks. He hadn't told her about the confession until now. 

“I'm just glad he didn't turn me away..”, Bertholdt mumbles, looking down at his feet past the top of his knees. A thoughtful hum emits from Annie by his side. Glancing over, Bertholdt looks at her quietly. Her face was unreadable, her bright blue eyes fixed upon him.

“No. Reiner is too good for that. He's not that much of an asshole.”

With a light frown, Bertholdt drops his gaze back down to his feet.

 

In the morning at ten, Annie had come over and was given a present from both Bertholdt and his father. Her eyes looked a bit more bright and wide when she opened Bertholdt's present, sitting at the dining table with the other two. Annie had stated she loved it and the moved onto the other present. It was a necklace with some sort of sparkly rock on the end. His dad must have made it. Annie thanked him and put it on.

Bertholdt had received a sharp and intimidating stainless steel hunting knife from his dad, along with it's case. He wasn't extremely thrilled for it, but he didn't expect anything else of him. He appreciated it. Bertholdt even gave his dad a light hug. But, his dad had refused anything from Bertholdt. It wasn't a surprise, because he does it every year. It saved Bertholdt the trouble, but he couldn't help but feel concerned anyways. 

So after Annie had opened her presents, the two went up to Bertholdt's bedroom. Once they had taken respective seats on the bed, Annie gave Bertholdt his present. It was a set of books of hundreds of different animal species, including information for each one. Bertholdt was much more pleased with this gift than the knife. He greatly enjoyed learning, and he was interested in animals as well. He gave her a smile, a thank you, and then stood to set the book set neatly in his bookshelf, which he will get to later. 

Following the receiving of her gift, Bertholdt told her about what happened between him and Reiner. She wasn't all that surprised.

“Were you aware that he felt that way..?” Bertholdt questions gently, eyes drifting up to her passive expression once more. She raises her piercing gaze from the quilt under them to his shy eyes. A light smirk perks at her lips.

“Yeah. Well. I was suspicious of it.”

Silently, Bertholdt watches her, waiting for more explanation. Sighing, Annie sits up from leaning back on her hands and then speaks. 

“He texted me about two weeks ago, saying he thought you were..what did he say? I think he sent three texts that was of him saying how cute you were, and then he said you were kissable, and maybe fuckable.”

That makes Bertholdt blush up to his ears. His eyebrows raise and he sees the smirk on Annie's lips extend. He looks away, trying to quell his blush and suddenly racing heart beat. Really? He said that? He thinks that Bertholdt is all of those things? If that was two weeks ago...that sounds like it was around the time of the party. 

With a shaky sigh, he looks over at Annie again, past his bangs.

“I thought Reiner was straight..”, he murmurs, fidgeting with his fingers in front of his shins. Annie shrugs and then plops back down onto the bed, arms crossed under her head. The strings to her hoodie land across her biceps. 

“Sexuality isn't a definite thing, Bertholdt. As long as he thinks about fucking you, that's what matters, right? I thought you liked him. Or did you finally get over it?”

A renewed blush erupts over Bertholdt's face. He hides his face behind his hands. “Don't be so crude!”, he complains. A scoff comes from Annie. 

“What are you, eleven? I thought you were experienced with this sort of thing. I can't believe just talking about it gets you flustered. You must be a wreck when it comes to the actual thing.”

Bertholdt yanks his hands down to glare at her. She was smiling.

“It's different when the person we're talking about is the guy I've been into for months, and he's supposedly straight! Jeez, Annie”, Bertholdt retorts, and childishly turns away from her, facing the bookshelf. He crosses his arms over his knees and hides his face in them. 

“You're planning to fuck though, right? When you two get back the dorm? I bet you won't be able to keep yourselves off of each other. I doubt you would come onto him so easily, so I think you should be wary of Reiner jumping you, Bertholdt”, Annie teasingly muses from behind him, obviously finding some amusement in this. Bertholdt stays stubbornly quiet, but he's blushing again. He was worrying over that too, actually. He wasn't exactly looking forward to returning to Uni.

He sighs. Like Reiner said, Bertholdt supposes he will let this happen however it will happen.

\----------

Since the night before Christmas morning, Bertholdt hadn't received a single text from Reiner. He was bothered by it at first, but he assumed he was just busy with the holiday or something. He can picture Reiner having a big, obnoxious family come over during holidays. 

It was late at night on the following day of Christmas, when Bertholdt was getting ready for bed. He had gotten up early that morning with his dad to go out and do some chores. It was almost ten at night, and he was so welcoming sleep at this point. He had changed into his usual plaid pyjama pants and grey t-shirt, before brushing his teeth. After relieving his bladder, he walked past his dad's door to return to his bedroom.

Once inside, he quietly shuts and locks the door behind himself. His dad had gone out into town about two hours ago. Bertholdt assumed it was to buy more alcohol. It didn't bother him, because it meant he had a more peaceful time in the house by himself. 

Standing against his bedroom door, he stares at his feet in the dimly lit room with a slightly morose expression. He felt kind of lonely, actually. Even if Annie had been here yesterday, he missed having constant company other than his father. But, it doesn't weigh down on him too much. He was used to it, anyways.

So he approaches his bed, and takes a seat with a quiet sigh. The lamp that was on cast many dark shadows across the surfaces of the room. The soft light gave Bertholdt a feeling of comfort. It made him a little sleepy too. Bertholdt was staring at the floor, in thought, but then his bag from school catches his eye. It was resting against the side of his bookcase. Standing, he walks over and grabs it. Pulling it open, he looks down into it with the help of the dim light. The dark evergreen shade of Reiner's hoodie catches his eye.

Bertholdt reaches in and pulls it out. Dropping his bag to his feet, he rights the hoodie and holds it in his hands. The crackling logo of Reiner's high school football team stares back at him. He rubs the soft fabric in his fingers. There were some loose threads, and some little holes on the cuffs of the sleeves. With a slight amount of hesitation, he pulls the hoodie over his head and smooths it down over himself.

Like when he had first tried it on, he takes notice of how its baggier around the midsection. But it was too short for Bertholdt. It pulled his t-shirt up a little on his stomach. He pulls it down gently and takes a seat on his bed. The hoodie really warmed him up. He raises a hand and lightly grasps some of the fabric on the shoulder in his fingers, and pulls it up to his face. Eyelids falling slightly, he inhales the scent of the Uni's laundry detergent, and Reiner's natural scent.

As he does this, he recalls Annie's words from the previous night. Reiner really thought he was 'fuckable'? Wouldn't Reiner think that was a little gay?

...Does he actually ever picture fucking Bertholdt? Like what Bertholdt thinks about sometimes? Does he get off on it like Bertholdt does? Bertholdt knows how it feels to be on the receiving end, so he can easily imagine how it would feel and what it would be like, but Reiner on the other hand, has only experience with vaginas. Well. _A_ vagina, more like. So he doesn't know the difference between vaginal and anal. 

Bertholdt blushes deeply due to his thoughts.

He doesn't stop breathing in Reiner's smell though. In fact, his thoughts along with the scent is stirring up that familiar warmth deep in his belly. Shyly, Bertholdt snakes a hand down the front of the hoodie, and to his waist to get a loose grasp around his cock under two layers of clothing. Now, he was only turned on. He hasn't done anything since that time in the shower. Now would be the time if any, because his father would be out for a while longer.

Bertholdt decides he may as well satisfy his arousal. He sees no reason not to, now that he isn't shamefully lusting after his best friend anymore, knowing Reiner feels the same way. First, he reaches over to open the drawer to his nightstand. He grabs the bottle of lotion from it and then leans back into the wall beside his bed. Setting the bottle down, he momentarily hesitates.

He lowers the fabric of the hoodie from his face and contemplates his decision. Is it really okay for him to do this? Is it acceptable for him to get off thinking about his best friend in that way? He isn't too turned on, and he could just ignore it, and the urge would go away. But why should he? He just worries that he'll feel guilty again.

In the end, his thoughts meander back to his fantasies, and that dissolves his concern. This would be his chance to do it, _and_ with Reiner's hoodie. So he nervously slips his boxers and pyjama pants down from his waist, letting his warmed cock meet the cool air of the room. He sighs and eases his pyjamas down to his knees before he leans back into the wall once more and obtains a careful grasp around the warm shaft of his arousal. 

He isn't entirely erect, so he gives a few slow, light strokes, watching with his eyelids drooping as the foreskin repeatedly moves over the pink head. He lets out another shaky sigh and spreads his thighs a little more. 

Then he grabs the lotion bottle and squeezes a little into his palm. Blushing as he rubs the substance into his hand, he tries not to think about what he's actually doing. Instead, he curls his fingers around his erection again once the lotion is warmed, and brings the fabric of the hoodie back to his face.

He lets Reiner's scent consume him. It sends a nice feeling through him, smelling Reiner like this. With slow, eased strokes of his hand, he lets his thoughts wander back to Reiner doing things like this to him. Its easy to picture Reiner's muscular body and smug face. He would probably be the teasing type in bed. No doubt. He would play with Bertholdt until Bertholdt couldn't handle it anymore, and he would just beg. Reiner would love to tease him that way.

Bertholdt begins to pant quietly into the hoodie, face flushed and breath short. His hand had begun to give quicker strokes now. He usually starts out with long, loose strokes, and once he feels himself grow closer to the end, he tightens his grasp around the head of his cock and gives short quick pulls. He hadn't reached that just yet. 

When he pictures Reiner doing this to him, getting him off this way, he bites at his bottom lip, eyelids fluttering a little at thought. With his brow furrowed, Bertholdt watches his hand move over his flushed, leaking arousal and licks at his dried lips. Then he lets out a quiet groan into the hoodie, effectively muffling it. 

Suddenly, he hears loud rattling vibrations break out into the room. Nearly jumping out of his skin, Bertholdt rips his hand away from his erection, panicking, and brings his knees in. His heart beats wildly in his chest both due to what he had been doing, and because of the startling noise.

He realizes its his phone. Great.

Leaning over, he grabs it from the nightstand with his dry hand that had been previously pulling on the hoodie. Sitting back, he looks at the screen. He pales and his stomach bottoms out. Reiner was calling him.

Shit, shit, shit. He was about to decline the call, but he considers it. He hasn't talked to Reiner in almost two days. What if it was urgent? What if Reiner _needed_ him to answer?

So, Bertholdt sighs audibly, shakes off his arousal momentarily, and swipes his thumb across the screen to answer it. Still panting quite noticeably, he presses it to his ear.

“Reiner?” Bertholdt speaks breathlessly.

“Bertholdt!”, Reiner's eager voice fills his ear. Bertholdt can't believe the person he was just fantasizing about during masturbation was talking to him. He rubs at his brow with his wet fingers, processes this, and grimaces. He wipes the wetness off his brow with the back of his wrist.

“Why...are you calling me?” Bertholdt questions as he attempts to quell his loud panting. He doesn't want Reiner to ask him about it. He tries calming his heart and breathing but it isn't going so well.

“You weren't replying to my texts, so I thought calling would get you to answer. I thought right. How are you?”

Bertholdt didn't even realize Reiner texted him. It must have been during dinner, when Bertholdt left his phone up here. He bites his lip. He can't really just _chat_ at the moment.

“Look..Reiner, I need to um, put you on hold. Could you wait for just a minute?” Bertholdt asks gently, brow furrowed. He was almost done, anyways. Reiner calling him didn't kill his arousal. In fact, hearing his voice only wanted him to touch himself more. But, he refuses to while on the phone with the blond.

“Oh, sure”, Reiner says, tone not as excited as before. Then Bertholdt murmurs a thanks, and lowers his phone from his ear to hurriedly press the hold button. He tosses his phone aside on the bed, back facing up, and then grabs his hot erection again.

Sighing, Bertholdt melts back against the wall and continues the movements of his hand. With his other hand, instead of pressing Reiner's hoodie to his face, he rests it over his lower abdomen, as he usually does when he's close to coming. He pants quietly as he tightens his grasp and quickens the strokes. 

“Ah...nngh”, he moans quietly, eyes clenching shut as he feels the intense sensation in his belly tighten up considerably. Hips wiggling a little on the bed, he begins to give short, quick pulls over the pink head of his cock as he clenches his toes in the pant legs of his pyjama bottoms. Embarrassing, loud wet noises fill the silence as his hand moves over his cock. 

As he feels the end coming near, his thoughts wildly picture Reiner pounding into him, down into the mattress of his bed back at Uni, holding him down with a commanding hold like he had done when they were wrestling around on the floor. Then he digs his head back into the wall, mouth fallen open, as he releases ropes of his ejaculation onto his palm and fingers. In between breathless gasps, he groans lowly, trembling as he recovers from the orgasm. 

The mental image wipes from his mind. Instead, he focuses on calming his breaths and heart beat, remembering he still has to return to the call. He wasn't even disgusted with himself for picturing that this time. 

Before he returns to the call, he cleans himself up with a flushed face, puts away his lotion, and pulls his boxers and pyjama pants back up. Then he grabs his phone, and turns himself around to lay back against his pillow. Raising the phone above him, he reaches up to undo hold. With a finger poised, he pauses. Its not on hold, though. After a mere moment of confusion, the utter horror replaces the confusion and his face erupts in a panicked blush.

Reiner couldn't have possibly heard all of that, right? How come it didn't turn on hold? He hit the damn button! His phone did this before, too!

Raising his free hand to bite roughly at his finger tips, he presses the phone hesitatingly to his ear, and pants quietly. Heavy dread builds in his stomach, giving him an uncomfortable feeling.

“I...I called at a really bad time, didn't I?”, Reiner asks quietly, after a long moment of silence.

Bertholdt actually shrieks, rips the phone from his ear and desperately hits the end call button with quick presses of his finger. Then he throws the phone at the carpet of his floor, and pulls his quilt over himself. Under the darkness of his quilt, he hides his red face in his hands, and groans in embarrassment. He feels himself break into a nervous sweat.

“I want to die, I want to die, I want to die”, Bertholdt chants to himself quietly as he miserably thinks about all the things Reiner heard. At least he didn't say Reiner's name..

After a minute of pause, Bertholdt hears his phone vibrate on the carpet. No doubt a text from Reiner. Blushing all over again, Bertholdt just curls into a ball and wills himself not to flip out again. How could he have fucked up so royally?

For the next ten minutes, he receives continuous texts, until Reiner gets the damn idea and stops texting Bertholdt. With a heaved sigh, Bertholdt begins to gnaw at his fingertips again. 

When he unintentionally breaks the skin and they begin to bleed, he decides its enough, and stops with his stupid habit he has trouble shaking off. So, instead, he pulls the quilt down from over his head, inhales a lungful of fresh air, and closes his eyes. He tries not to dwell over the fact Reiner heard all of that, and attempts to grasp wanted unconsciousness.

Bertholdt wishes that he could just forget about it all. 

He'll deal with it tomorrow. Or, preferably, never.


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Warning:** Mentions of past self-harm. Nothing graphic at all, though.

Frankly, Bertholdt didn't bother interacting with Reiner for the remainder of the break. 

Reiner texted him endlessly following the incident (constant apologies and let's just forget about it's, etc), but eventually his texts became more sparse. Bertholdt thought it was sweet how he would still ask how his day was, and if he slept well, despite the fact Bertholdt didn't reply. Reiner probably felt bad for what happened, but Bertholdt still refused to talk to him after that. He was just too damn humiliated. 

Bertholdt would occasionally open his phone and look at Reiner's contact, but when it actually came to typing up a text, he would become flustered and embarrassed and fail to send it through. In the end, he distracted himself with chores, his N64, and those books Annie gave him for Christmas. 

Eventually, the new year rolled by, and like every year, Bertholdt shared a glass of wine with his dad outside, watching as the neighbors set off fireworks like they always did. This time, Bertholdt made sure it was only one glass of wine, not an entire bottle.

It wasn't a big deal, the new year. In fact, he thought it wasn't a thing to celebrate over, but whatever. People like to have reasons to party and drink. Bertholdt was only reminded about the fact his mother's death anniversary was creeping closer and closer. What happened occurred in January, so when its a new year, Bertholdt begins to dread the upcoming month.

A few days after the first, Bertholdt was to leave his home for Uni once again. He was more concerned about seeing Reiner again than leaving his father all alone. His father was independent. Bertholdt was too, so he didn't have to fret over it.

On the day Bertholdt was packing his clothes and necessaries into his bag once more, he became stressed out about seeing Reiner again, and if he would be confronted about basically everything. In the end, he chewed up his fingertips again. He had sighed as he gazed at the red sliding down his fingers. Annie didn't like it when he continued his habit for a reason. Bertholdt would do it deliberately. It wasn't as harmful as a razor, though. 

He grimaces at that thought, and hurries to distract himself. 

\----------

When Annie pulls up to the familiar dormitory building, Bertholdt's dread weighs down on him. He remains in the passenger seat of Annie's Volvo, clutching his bag, Anne touches him on the shoulder gently and says that he doesn't have to worry about it. She wasn't aware of the phone call incident, but she can tell when Bertholdt is stressing over something.

Sighing, Bertholdt decides he may as well man up and just face it. So he mumbles a thank you to Annie, and climbs out of the car. Usually, Annie just drives off as soon as he steps out, but she hesitates and watches as Bertholdt shuffles over to the front entrance with his bag over his shoulder. It reminds her of the first day of Bertholdt's arrival to the college. He was acting the same way, too. 

When Bertholdt disappears from her view, she shakes her head, and turns back to her steering wheel to pull out of the parking lot.

 

Bertholdt's legs feel like lead as he forces them up step after step of the unpleasantly familiar flight of stairs. He knows he's making it such a bigger deal than it is, but that is how he is. He makes small little worries grow and bloom into endless dread and stress. 

When he makes it to the door at the end of the hall with the respectful room number, he looks down and notices through the crack of the door that the light is on. He lets out a deep, heavy exhale. A nervous sweat breaks out over his skin and he begins to raise his hand to his lips, but he stops himself and yanks his hand away. No more. He wasn't going to cope with his problems just by gnawing on his fingers. It never solved anything.

So instead, he reached over to turn the doorknob and push the door open. Heart thumping loudly and quickly in his chest, he bites at the inside of his cheek as he quietly shuts the door behind him. With his gaze down, he turns towards his bed and walks over to it to set his bag atop it. Then, with shaky hands, he unwound the scarf he received from Reiner from around his neck. Quietly, he looks down at it in his hands, and then sets it atop his bag.

Looking over towards Reiner's bed, he notices how the blond is sitting there with his legs over the side, hands fiddling together in his lap. When he notices Bertholdt is finally acknowledging him, he offers a light smile. Bertholdt blushes and jerks his gaze back down to his bag. He bites at his lip as he removes his coat. 

“Do you know if the others have arrived yet?” Bertholdt asks quietly, peeking over his shoulder towards Reiner. Reiner was watching him and noticed when Bertholdt looked at him. His face lights up at the question.

“Oh! Yeah, I greeted them like, twenty minutes ago. You want to say hi?”

“Maybe later”, Bertholdt answers, and turns back to his bag to unzip it. He begins removing his few books and some clothing. A few minutes pass, before he hears Reiner awkwardly clear his throat. Turning towards him a little, Bertholdt raises his gaze to him with one of his shirts in his hands. 

“Uh..could I have my hoodie back sometime?” Reiner quietly asks, rubbing at his neck with a blush upon his face, eyes flickering back and forth to Bertholdt. Bertholdt's blood runs cold and his mouth falls open. He struggles to think of something to say, anything to deny the fact he would have it, but Reiner beats him to it.

“You really think I wouldn't notice?” 

Bertholdt blushes and turns away from the other, hiding his face in his hands. He didn't know what to do. Why wasn't Reiner flipping out over the fact Bertholdt kept his favorite hoodie from him for like, two and a half weeks? He then hears Reiner's bed squeak, with footsteps following. He hopes Reiner isn't actually going to come over and--Bertholdt feels a hand on his arm.

“Hey”, he hears Reiner say, as he turns the taller boy towards himself. Still hiding his face behind his hands, Bertholdt makes a weak noise, and blushes harder. The touch just reminds him of the stupid phone call and the stupid flirty texting and the fact Reiner knows he stole his hoodie and how they both said they were into each other, and Bertholdt's mind is basically sizzling right now. 

“Bertholdt, I don't mind that you took my hoodie for like, two weeks, and I forgive you for ignoring me. I'm sorry that I listened to you jerk off, but that's in the past. Oh my God, you're really red right now.”

Bertholdt eventually drops his hands to give Reiner a big glare between his words. When Reiner makes that small observation, Bertholdt smacks him on the arm. Maybe he was acting childish, but Reiner was being annoyingly blunt. 

“You're being really ridiculous right now, Bertl”, Reiner comments. Bertholdt huffs, but doesn't say anything. Instead he pushes past the other and escapes into the bathroom, saying, “And you're being too straightforward, idiot!”, as he goes. After shutting and locking the door behind himself, he sits on the floor against the door for about ten minutes, before he cools down, thinks about what to say, and quietly leaves the room.

Then he silently walks over to where Reiner is sitting on his bed, and claims a seat beside him.

“I'm sorry”, he murmurs, looking down at his lap where his hands lay. After a long, tense pause of silence, Bertholdt hears the bed shift, and then feels warm arms envelope him in a comforting embrace.

“It's okay. Sorry for freaking you out earlier.”

Bertholdt sighs, body visibly deflating, releasing the tenseness in his muscles, and leans into Reiner. He rests his head against Reiner's shoulder, hunching his back a little, and peeks up at him. Reiner was looking downwards, but not at him. 

“I still like you”, Bertholdt admits, blushing a little, and rests a hand on Reiner's knee. Reiner hums and rubs his hand over Bertholdt's side. He nods and then peeks down at Bertholdt.

“I'm still into you, too. And you can keep the hoodie, if you really want to.”

“...Okay.”

Then they're silent for a long while. Bertholdt eventually closes his eyes, and enjoys the embrace.

What shocks them out of the moment, is quick knocks on the door. Reiner releases Bertholdt, and Bertholdt stands, glances at Reiner, and approaches the door. Drawing it open a little, Bertholdt looks out to see Eren and Connie standing there.

“Yo, Bert! Long time no see!”, Connie exclaims, and claps a hand over Bertholdt's shoulder. Bertholdt offers a weak smile. Eren seems to be a little thrilled to see Bertholdt as well, judged on his light smile. Bertholdt steps aside, and Connie and Eren rush inside.

They start talking to Reiner about plans for later that night, about going out and doing some thing or another. Bertholdt had ended up leaving because the noise level was giving him a headache. He wound up walking over to Marco's dorm room down the hall. 

Once he had raised a hand to knock, he hesitates, realizing Jean might be in there too. But, his desire to say hi to Marco overrules the hesitance, so he gives a few quiet knocks. He hears some distant, muffled noises, before the lock is noisily turned and the door is pulled open.

Marco's scarred and freckled face appears, and his dimples appear when he grins brightly at the other.

“Bertholdt!”, Marco yells with excitement, and jumps over to give him a one-armed hug. Bertholdt smiles and returns the hug briefly. Then Marco steps back and asks him how his break was. After Bertholdt answers and returns the question, Marco realizes they're standing out in the hallway and invites him inside. Bertholdt feels much better already. Luckily, Jean wasn't there after all.

He ended up talking with Marco for a long while. What broke them out of their long exchange of conversing, was Jean entering the room,claiming Marco better give him a heavenly back massage because his back was killing him like he was an old man. He stopped in his tracks when he noticed Bertholdt, though.

“Ah..I'll go now. It was nice talking to you again, Marco”, Bertholdt says gently, turning back to his friend, and offers a light smile. Marco grins and nods. He sets a soft hand on Bertholdt's arm, and says goodbye. Bertholdt stands, offers Jean a quiet hello, before he hurries out of the room. 

When he returns to the dorm room, he finds it empty and unlocked. Its acceptable this time, because Bertholdt doesn't have his own key on him. He knows Reiner went out with his friends, and that's okay. Reiner texted his phone anyways, saying he'll be back later tonight. To preoccupy himself, Bertholdt takes out one of the thick animal species books Annie gave him, and opened to the last page he was on.

 

In the end, Bertholdt had read for about two hours, before his hunger grasped his attention, and he went out to get food at the deli. He feels small comfort by the familiar pathways and buildings. Once in the deli, he had removed his scarf with a smile and claimed his usual place in the corner, after he bought a pretzel and a water, along with a Yoplait yogurt.

He stayed for about thirty minutes, taking his time with eating, before he read some of his book. Eventually, he wondered if Reiner was back yet, so he left with a hopefulness. As he walked through the cool air outside the deli towards the dormitory building, down a pathway, he tightens the snowflake scarf around his neck and thinks that maybe he didn't _have_ to stress too badly over Reiner. Reiner was very understanding, it seems.

 

Once he makes it back to the room, he's disappointed to find it empty upon unlocking and pushing open the door. He doesn't let it bother him though. Instead, he removes his coat and scarf and shoes, before falling onto his bed with a heaved sigh. He turns his head towards the room and squints at the clock on the opposite wall. It was half past nine. Sighing, he decides he is considerably exhausted.

He thinks about the fact he hasn't gone to the gym since the beginning of the break. His dad didn't like to use the truck so often, and Bertholdt didn't like using public transportation. He didn't think about using his own car, though. It wasn't a huge problem, because Bertholdt kept himself in shape at home doing his daily work outs and stretches. Maybe he could go back tomorrow.

He gets sleepy draped over his bed. Earlier, he had finished putting away his clothes and things, and making his bed, so he had no other responsibilities. Its late enough for it to be considered acceptable to go to bed. When everyone else is out actually enjoying their evening, Bertholdt is considering going to bed. He almost laughs at the thought. Who even goes to bed around nine in college? Bertholdt just thinks he wouldn't have anything to do if he were to stay up any longer.

So, he gets up to begin changing. Once peeling off his sweater, he tosses it into the laundry hamper. He approaches his dresser and pulls out his grey t-shirt. Once retrieving his pyjama bottoms, he removes his jeans, and then pulls on his pyjama pants before his t-shirt. 

He sighs, feeling a little melancholic, but not enough for it to be a problem. He's a little anxious for tomorrow, but its nothing he can't handle. After turning off the light and locking the door, he slips under the coaxing comforter to his bed, and nuzzles into his pillow. This bed seems a lot more comfortable than the one back at home. He sighs in a much more relaxed manner this time, and feels the sleepiness overtake him.

Within ten minutes, he falls asleep peacefully.

\----------

But, he is awoken a while later by the bed jostling under him. He first processes that he is awake again, before blearily blinking his eyes open. Its very dark inside the room. The only source of light is the moonlight filtering in through the window. He makes a noise of confusion deep in his throat, and clenches his eyes shut again, brow furrowed. He rolls over from his belly, and sets a hand on his stomach. He isn't too concerned. He probably just woke himself up from moving about.

But then he feels the mattress dip on either side of him. He furrows his brow, eyes moving under his lids in discomfort. Then he realizes there is actually something else moving his bed when he feels something press to his lips. Snapping his eyes open, he stares at someone's closed eyes. Then they open, and golden irises meet his.

He jerks his head away, and wildly looks up at Reiner, propped above him on his hands and knees. 

“R-Reiner?!”, he hisses, blushing when he processes what just happened. He swallows thickly and licks his lips, raising a hand to gently press it against Reiner's bare chest. He gasps at the hot skin against his cold hand, and pulls his hand away in surprise.

Without a word, Reiner stares down at him with a fire in his eyes, and captures Bertholdt's flushed cheeks in his hands. Then he angles his head and firmly kisses Bertholdt on the lips again. Bertholdt makes a noise of complaint in his throat, and his hands fly up to press into Reiner's warm chest again. He feels Reiner's slightly chapped lips move against his and its really really distracting. Too distracting. It messes with Bertholdt's right mind. He makes soft noises into Reiner's lips, and eventually, instead of protesting with light pushes, Bertholdt moves his hands around to hook his arms around Reiner's neck.

Maybe this wasn't such a bad way to be woken up in the middle of the night.

One of Reiner's hands holding his face slides down over his neck and collarbone. Then the hand lifts and moves under the covers to touch Bertholdt's belly.

Bertholdt feels warm from the exchange of lips. He feels nice, too. But when Reiner's hand slides up his stomach, under his shirt, he jerks under the other and realizes what's happening. So he turns his head away, breaking the kiss, and pants heavily.

“Reiner, no”, he says, lowering his arm from around Reiner's neck to grab his wrist. Reiner leans back a little to look him in the eyes. He searches in Bertholdt's eyes for an answer, but doesn't speak.

“Not yet”, Bertholdt murmurs, eyes falling to look at Reiner's lips. He expected Reiner to question him, but instead, Reiner nods and they fall silent. Reiner removes his hand and Bertholdt swallows down the rock in his throat. His face is really red, Reiner's, and it makes Bertholdt smile softly.

“Can you sleep with me?” Bertholdt softly whispers, raising his hand from Reiner's wrist to run his fingertips over the side of Reiner's face. Reiner gazes down at him with a gentle smile and bright eyes, and then nods.

He falls beside Bertholdt on the bed, and Bertholdt scoots over to give him more room. Reiner lifts himself to pull the covers out from under himself, and then slips underneath. Bertholdt is smiling as he watches, and when Reiner settles, Bertholdt boldly scoots closer. Reiner chuckles lowly in the dark room and then captures Bertholdt's kissed lips under his own. Bertholdt hums softly and sneaks his arms higher to cup Reiner's warm cheeks in his hands. 

The soft sounds of their kissing breaks the silence in the room, and Bertholdt eventually has to break away to suck in quick breaths. Reiner mouths at Bertholdt's jawline instead, his arm securing around his midsection as he does so.

Bertholdt closes his eyes and tips his head back a little. He loves kisses to his jaw and neck. He lets Reiner mouth down his neck for a moment. Its when he began to grow aroused when he leaned away and pressed a hand over Reiner's lips.

“No more. Lets go back to bed. We have classes in the morning”, Bertholdt murmurs, and slides his hand away. Reiner smirks at him and presses a last kiss to his lips, before he gestures with a spin of his finger for Bertholdt to turn over. So, Bertholdt hesitatingly obliges, and turns around in Reiner's hold to press his back back into Reiner. Reiner settles close behind him.

“Reiner..”, Bertholdt grumbles in mild surprise and annoyance when he feels Reiner's erection press into his lower back. He hears chuckles and then feels Reiner's hand rest comfortably over his belly.

“How come I'm the little spoon when I'm taller than you?”

“Because I know you like being held.”

Bertholdt huffs, and can't help but agree. He situates more comfortably back into Reiner, and then closes his eyes. He feels relief and happiness, glad that things turned out this way. Bertholdt falls asleep within only a few minutes, the warmth and comfort easing him quickly into unconsciousness. With a last lingering thought, Bertholdt hopes he doesn't move around too much in his sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** lmao I've been looking forward to this specific part since the drunk!Bertholdt chapter.


	24. Chapter 24

Following the first day of classes after the Christmas break, Reiner is ready to give up on life. 

In the morning, he had found Bertholdt missing from the bed. He must have left for his first class earlier, and that puts Reiner instantly in a mood of disappointment. Luckily, his own alarm woke him up. When typically, it doesn't. 

After he had gotten up with a groan from Bertholdt's bed, and sluggishly approached the small table beside his own, he turned off the alarm clock. Standing alone in the dimly lit dorm room, Reiner sighs and rubs at his face with his hands. Now that he has responsibilities again, following the break, he has to put forth effort.

So he begins to change into a more casual outfit for the day.

 

When he made it to his first class, he claimed a seat in the corner by the wall. After sitting there, barely conscious, for about twenty minutes, he couldn't stand the droning voice of the lecturer any longer, and fell forward onto his desk before passing out, head buried in his folded arms. He had woken up ten minutes before the end of the lecture when a student dropped a book and it landed on the floor with a resounding smack that made Reiner lurch back in his seat with alarm. Groggily, he looked around and realized he missed a whole hour worth of note-taking. In the end, he solemnly asked for the notes from someone he was familiar with. 

During the break after two more classes, he was so ready to collapse. That nap earlier made him even more exhausted. He had stayed up til three in the morning last night. He had tried to go to bed earlier than that, but failed to miserably because he couldn't stop thinking about going over and kissing Bertholdt. In the end, it wound up that way, but not without fucking up Reiner's sleep in the process. 

Throughout the morning classes, that was truly all Reiner could think about, so it negatively effected his thought processes and understanding what the hell the professors were talking about. By the time the break in between rolled in, Reiner decided he would just stop imagining doing really gay things with Bertholdt. Kissing is pretty gay enough. 

Reiner ponders over his attraction to the other. He is positive he likes Bertholdt. More than a friend. In a way. But Bertholdt was the first guy he's felt this towards. And Reiner is positive he is one-hundred percent straight. Well. Maybe ninety percent. Before this, he's only been attracted to girls, so this was very sudden. Maybe it was just Bertholdt individually? He just happened to develop a thing for him?

Now standing in the small line at Starbucks, Reiner muses over it as he waits for his turn. 

After he had grabbed a PSL, he left the coffee shop, hoping to catch Bertholdt back at the room or something. He knew Bertholdt has the same break as him today. His steps are quicker as he begins towards the dormitory building, orange and brown leaves crackling under his quick feet as he paces down the stone pathway, passing other students along the way. 

As he enters the dorm building, his thoughts meander back to his thoughts of Bertholdt. It was kind of ironic, actually. At first, he wasn't pleased at all to find that he was going to be sharing a dorm room with a stranger. After all, that stranger just happened to be an interesting, but quiet, boy that may or may not be cute. Reiner thinks that perhaps Eren lying to him about who he was bunking with wasn't such a bad thing in the end.

Although, sadly, Bertholdt is missing from the dorm room when Reiner shoves in after unlocking the door. He was a little crestfallen, honestly, but it wasn't a big deal. He would see Bertholdt later today. Instead of leaving though, he drops his books on his desk and then takes a heavy seat on his bed. He stares across the room, free hand draped in his lap, as he takes a swig of his coffee.

Then he sighs, sets the cup aside, and retrieves his phone from his jeans. Even if he had been glancing at it all day, he still checks to see if Bertholdt texted him at all. None from Bertholdt, Reiner notes with a frown, but there is one from Connie. He opens it to skim over it.

“ _we're plannin to watch a movie later 2nite, u wanna join us? in the lounge room like usual. we might go out n get snacks later_ ”

“ _Which movie?_ ”, Reiner texts back before dropping his phone by his side and kicking off his shoes. He had about an hour left before his next class. He could get to his work and notes but he would rather not, actually. So he gets up with a grunt and approaches his desk to unplug his laptop, and bring it back over to his bed.

He hears his phone vibrate on the bed when he walks back to it. So after taking a seat once more and propping up against the wall, he grabs it and opens the text.

“ _inglorious basterds_ ”

“ _Shit son count me in then_ ”, Reiner replies with a light grin. He loves that movie. 

“ _sweet. It'll be at 7. bring bert if u want_ ”

After reading the text, he sets his phone aside with that thought floating around in his mind as he opens his laptop on his lap. Would Bertholdt even be interested in that kind of movie? Well, at least he could ask. Bertholdt might have work to do or something, though, being the productive student he is. 

As Reiner opens Facebook, the concern drifts away. Glancing at the time on his laptop, he still has some time left. 

He grows bored with the dumb website after fifteen minutes or so, so instead he shuts his laptop and grabs his phone again. He considers texting someone. Reiner opens Christa's contact out of habit. With a frown, he scrolls up through all the texts he had sent her weeks ago. For a moment, he dwells over his stupid mistakes regarding her, cringes, and then hurriedly goes to Bertholdt's contact instead.

The image of his sleeping face makes him smile as he types out a quick text.

“ _hey bertl. You up for a movie later tonight at 7? all the guys will be there too_ ”

After sending it, he stares at the text for a moment. He wonders if that's too straightforward or whatever. He shrugs and then reaches over with his free hand to grab his coffee. Taking a drink, he stares at his phone, willing Bertholdt to reply sooner. Bertholdt always takes longer than himself to reply. 

After about two minutes, he gets a reply.

Opening it, he reads it eagerly.

“ _Sure. I'm assuming this is taking place in the lounge room?_ ”

Reiner grins brightly, pleased with Bertholdt's acceptance, and then hurriedly swipes his thumbs over his screen to type up a reply.

“ _yeah, connie said we might go out and get snacks too. You probably shouldn't get a moon pie again_ ”

Thankfully, Bertholdt is quicker to reply to the text this time.

“ _Probably not. I'll see you there later, then._ ”

“ _yeah! So how were your classes, bertl? Are you one of those people who like going to class?_ ”

“ _They were fine. Same old same old. Actually, I prefer being here rather than home, so technically, yes. And you?_ ”

Reiner takes another drink of his PSL as he swipes a reply out.

“ _my classes were boring and slow. I was distracted the entire time anyways._ ”

“ _What distracted you?_ ”

“ _thinking about last night, but you dont like it when im too blunt like that so i'll be vague and say that my thoughts distracted me._ ”

Bertholdt takes longer to reply to that one. Glancing at the time in the corner of his phone, he notices he has half an hour left, and his next class was pretty far from the dormitory building. So he gets up, and stretches with a groan. After downing the rest of his coffee, he tosses it in the trash bin beside his bed and crouches over to pull on his shoes again.

Once he hears his phone vibrate on his bed, he pauses and turns back to grab it.

“ _Why say that when you already said it? Jeez, Reiner. And I may as well be honest too, and say likewise. You better not mention this during the movie or I'm going to smack you_ ”

Reiner grins brightly. Despite the courageous facade that Bertholdt portrays through the text, he knows he's all flustered in person. When he promises violence, it means he's embarrassed. How cute. Reiner laughs and approaches his desk to grab his books from it. 

After leaving the room and locking the door behind himself, he takes out his phone as he begins down the hallway, opening a new text. He types it out as he approaches the end of the hallway.

“ _oh really? Was my kissing too good for you to forget? Im flattered. Yknow if you really liked it, you know where to find me xoxo_ ”

\----------

Reiner was smacked as soon as Bertholdt entered the lounge room at 7:14, startling the blond who was sitting on the couch, talking with Jean and Marco. Jerking his head over his shoulder to eye whoever hit him, Reiner raises his gaze to find a rather tall and glaring Bertholdt towering over him with crossed arms and a flushed face.

“You're so stupid”, is all Bertholdt spits, before he strides around the couch and takes a harsh, angry seat beside the other. Reiner pauses, and then barks out laughter, raising a hand to ruffle Bertholdt's dark hair. Bertholdt smacks his hand away as Jean asks what the fuck is going on. 

Connie, Sasha, and Eren who were standing around the flat screen before the couch, trying to figure out how to play the stupid movie, had turned to watch the display of an irritated Bertholdt. Connie's brows were high enough to be considered his hair, and Eren was totally dumbfounded. Sasha was laughing quietly due to the exchange.

“Bertl is just pissy because of what I said to him”, Reiner explains through chuckles as he pats said Bertholdt on the back with a gentle hand. Reiner briefly glances over at everyone's curious faces, before he returns his gaze to Bertholdt. Bertholdt realized he was the center of attention and now was blushing a brighter red, eyes fixed stubbornly on his lap.

“What you said must've been real bad if it means Bertholdt gets violent”, Marco pipes up as Connie, Eren, and Sasha go back to attending to the movie. Jean gives a nod of agreement. Reiner turns back to the two and grins.

“Anyways”, Jean begins before Reiner could reply to that, obviously no longer interested in it anymore. Just as Jean was about to continue from where they left off on their conversation before Bertholdt interrupted, Connie's loud voice calls out.

“Hey, its working!”

Just then, the opening music to the movie fills the room, so Connie, Eren, and Sasha hurry to the couch. Reiner laughs as Connie leaps onto the couch beside Bertholdt, startling the taller boy, and Sasha claims an obnoxious seat beside him. Eren is calmer than the other two when he sits on the end. 

Reiner looks to his side when he feels Bertholdt press up closer to him, no doubt trying to get away from Connie. Bertholdt was glancing back at him with a grimace on his face, and it makes Reiner laugh quietly. Reiner casually hooks an arm around Bertholdt's shoulders and forces him closer until their hips are touching and Bertholdt falls against his chest with shock apparent on his face.

Everyone was talking excitedly about the moving and getting situated, so they didn't notice the small exchange. Bertholdt looks at Reiner with mild horror on his face, blushing to his ears, and presses against his side to pull away.

“Nope, you're not going anywhere”, Reiner muses as he keeps a strong arm around him. Bertholdt looks flustered and unsure of what to say, so instead he slumps against him in defeat. Amused, Reiner realizes Bertholdt is more compliant when there's more people around. Trying to avoid attention, then. Reiner loosens his hold so Bertholdt isn't pressed up against him too much. 

It could be seen as friendly, right? 

Then Jean snaps at Connie and Sasha to shut up, and it grows silent, except for Marco's quiet giggling. Reiner slides his arm away from around Bertholdt's shoulders, elbow cocked back over the back of the couch. Instead, he slyly rests his hand over the back of Bertholdt's neck. Reiner tries to conceal his grin when Bertholdt leans away and gives him a glare. 

Reiner decides he shouldn't tease him anymore, and pays attention to the movie. Yet, he keeps an arm over the back of the couch, behind Bertholdt. After about five minutes into the movie, Reiner notices Bertholdt lean back more into the cushion, and essentially, against Reiner's arm. Reiner smirks to himself, and glances over at Bertholdt. Bertholdt was blushing a little, but he was keeping his eyes fixed on the screen. 

Connie and Sasha were talking again, but the noise of the movie stood out more. Reiner glances over to Jean and Marco, and notices how Marco was tucked in Jean's arms, head resting on his boyfriend's shoulder. He looks away, averting his eyes to Bertholdt. Bertholdt olive green eyes flicker to his. They keep eye contact for a moment, until Bertholdt shyly returns his gaze to the TV.

When the loud sound of gunfire and menacing music suddenly rips through the room, Reiner twitches in surprise, but Bertholdt jumps and it makes Reiner chuckle quietly. Bertholdt gives him a brief look of annoyance, but doesn't retaliate. That jerk of surprise made Bertholdt rest against his side, so Reiner wasn't complaining. 

 

When the bar scene begins a while later, Connie leaps up and runs to the TV to pause the movie. By that time, some other people have filed in and out of the lounge room, but they didn't stay because of the obnoxious noise and the unwanted group of people.

“Lets go get some snacks!”, Connie exclaims. “Yes!”, Sasha agrees with a shout as she jumps up from the couch, startling both Bertholdt and Eren. Jean whines about it until Marco says it could be fun, and so Jean groans out 'fine' and then both he and Marco stand. Reiner slips his arm out from behind Bertholdt and stands up as well. He hears Bertholdt quietly follow.

“So, gas station or the vending machines downstairs?” Connie asks as they all begin towards the exit of the lounge room. 

“Are you kidding?” Jean begins, “I'm not walking out in the cold when there are perfectly accessible junk food in the lobby. Jesus, Connie.” Eren quietly agrees, for once, while Marco laughs. “Whatever”, Connie calls in reply and Jean scoffs. 

“Hey, you know, if you want to go to the gas station, go to the damn gas station, Connie. No one's holding you back”, Reiner says, as they file out of the room and begin down the hallway. He lags in the back with Bertholdt, not wanting to leave the other behind. Connie was at the front of the group and merely shrugged while Sasha gushed about how bigger the selection would be at the gas station.

 

It takes about fifteen minutes for everyone to get their own snacks, because Sasha takes forever to decide, and Connie is buying way too much. In the end, Reiner grabbed a Dr. Pepper and some chips, while Bertholdt got just a water. By the time they wound up back in the lounge room, Connie had dropped many parts of his junk food meal, and Sasha kept trying to grab the fallen pieces before Connie could. 

Again, Bertholdt wound up beside Reiner, but Eren was sitting beside him instead of Connie. The loud crinkling of wrappers overrules the dialogue of the movie, and it nearly drives Jean nuts. Marco manages to calm him down, but not after he snaps at Connie and Sasha again.

Reiner was a little amused over it all, but he just wanted to watch the damn movie. 

 

It was a long process, but they eventually finished it. Sasha had crashed immediately after eating her snacks, and Connie was actually quiet for once, only occasionally commenting on this or that. Reiner was glad that that was the case. Sasha always riled Connie up. 

Throughout the movie, Reiner had glanced away from the gruesome parts like the head scalping or showing them shooting a guy's face up, and that obviously amused Bertholdt, based on his snickering. Reiner didn't mind it too much though, because Bertholdt was leaning against him, and let him keep an arm over the back of the couch behind him. It was almost an embrace, but Reiner didn't want to go that far, among his friends. Bertholdt pressing against him like this could be seen as friendly.

When the credits rolled, Bertholdt sat away as Connie got up and stretched. In the end, it was only Reiner, Bertholdt, Connie, Jean, and Marco who had stayed. Eventually Sasha had woken up and trudged back to her room after saying goodbye, and Eren left after a bit, claiming it was getting late and it wasn't worth his time. Watching the movie took longer than the movie itself. 

It was almost ten. Reiner was tired as hell. He barely got sleep last night, and he was chugging along on fumes. He nearly fell asleep too, seeing as it was nice and comfortable with Bertholdt against him. 

As soon as the movie had ended, Jean and Marco left after saying goodnight (Marco especially paused to say something to Bertholdt, but Reiner couldn't quite catch it because Connie was yelling about something again). Bertholdt was still sitting with Reiner, so Reiner didn't bother getting up. Instead he kept his eyes fixed on Bertholdt, until Bertholdt glanced at him. Connie was taking out the DVD from the movie player, so Reiner let himself succumb to the desire he's felt throughout the movie, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to Bertholdt's cheek.

Instantly, Bertholdt sputtered and Reiner sat back to see him blush darkly. Standing, Reiner smirks to himself and approaches Connie who was reaching up to turn off the TV. He doesn't look back at Bertholdt, instead he reaches where Connie couldn't to press the power button.

 

Walking back to the dorm room with Bertholdt was a little tense. Bertholdt was quiet and staring ahead, and Reiner couldn't help but glance at him occasionally. He wonders if what he did was too much back in the room. Reiner was fine with it, even though he should be worried if anyone saw it. But he wasn't, because everyone had left, and Connie was too oblivious. Bertholdt was probably just being shy. That thought makes Reiner smirk.

When they finally reached the door at the end, Bertholdt silently removed the key from his pocket, and unlocked the door. Reiner noticed from the side that Bertholdt had to retry getting the key in twice. His hand was shaking. 

When the door is open and Bertholdt walks in, Reiner follows, and quietly shuts the door behind himself. Turning on the light, Reiner looks over at Bertholdt who was standing by the wall beside his desk, hands fiddling with the hem of his sweater, eyes fixed over at the blond. Reiner quirks a brow, and it makes Bertholdt's cheeks bloom in color after a moment. Reiner thinks it looks lovely on his skin tone, and walks over.

Luckily, Bertholdt isn't _too_ tall, so Reiner can reach his lips when he pushes him against the wall gently and connects their mouths. He feels Bertholdt raise his hands up, curling his arms around his neck as he kisses back with a soft noise dying in his throat. 

Reiner forgot to lock the door, but he doesn't care. He keeps his hands against Bertholdt's chest, grasping fistfuls of his sweater to keep him against the wall as they share lips. Bertholdt's hand slides up into his short blond hair, grasping the short locks in his fingers when Reiner slipped his tongue out to swipe it over Bertholdt's bottom lip.

He smirks against Bertholdt's mouth when the lips against his relent, and open for a tongue to meet his. Reiner kisses Bertholdt's mouth softly as their tongues gently touch. He feels a warmth bloom in his belly as they share the embrace of lips and tongue, feeling aroused as he continues to press the other boy against the wall. He feels Bertholdt's hand in his hair move down to rest on his neck.

Eventually, they had to break the kiss to breathe. Reiner opened his eyes to meet Bertholdt's, and saw how flushed his face was. His eyes were dilated, too. Reiner pants with Bertholdt, their eyes locked, until Bertholdt licked his lips, and then Reiner broke the eye contact to dip his head down to mouth at Bertholdt's jaw line. He hears Bertholdt sigh quietly, and then he tilts his head back a little for more access. Reiner smiles against his skin as he presses kisses. 

Reiner releases his grasp on Bertholdt's sweater as he mouths at the tan skin stretched taut over his neck, eyes falling close as he slips his hands down Bertholdt's torso. He hears Bertholdt breathe softer as Reiner's hand wander down. 

“Reiner..”, Bertholdt murmurs when Reiner gropes his cock through his jeans. Reiner processes he's hard. He pauses when he hears his name spoken, and expects Bertholdt to tell him to stop. Reiner pulls away to look at Bertholdt. Reiner feels another pleasant pull in his gut when he sees the flushed, lustful expression upon his face. But Bertholdt's eyebrows are knit together.

“I don't think we should”, Bertholdt says softly, keeping his eyes on Reiner's. 

Knowing he can't disregard Bertholdt's wishes, Reiner removes his hands and apologizes. Bertholdt gives him a gentle smile and then says a moment later, with his arms still around Reiner's neck, “We can still kiss, though. I like kissing you..”

Reiner smirks at that, and then says quietly, “Knew it.” 

Bertholdt only smiles shyly, and then opens his mouth to say something more.

“Also, can we move to a bed, because its not exactly comfortable being shoved against a wall, you know.”

Reiner laughs lightly at that, nods, and then steps away. He gently grabs Bertholdt around the wrist and guides him over to his bed. As he takes a seat, he raises his eyes to Bertholdt. Bertholdt begins to blush as he takes a quiet seat beside him, facing towards the other.

Raising a hand, Reiner gently holds Bertholdt's warm cheek in his palm and brushes his thumb over the flushed skin. Bertholdt was looking at him with a tenderness in his eyes, and a soft smile on his lips. Reiner gazes into his eyes, enamored with his pretty olive green irises, before he leans in to kiss him again.

Like Bertholdt typically does, he raises his arms to hook them around Reiner's neck. Reiner slips his hand away from Bertholdt's cheek to curl his arm around him, hand moving to rest over his upper back instead. Bertholdt hums into his lips.

Reiner doesn't get an invitation from Bertholdt to use his tongue, so he doesn't. Instead they share lips comfortably, enjoying the warmth and intimacy. They break away to breathe the air together. Reiner opens his eyes to look at the other when he feels Bertholdt's forehead against his. Bertholdt's eyes were closed. Reiner smiles and once he's sure they've caught their breath, he angles his head to softly press his lips to Bertholdt's once more. Bertholdt returns it softly, with gentle purses of his lips as his fingers slide into Reiner's hair again. 

After about ten more minutes of simple chaste kissing, Reiner is disappointed when Bertholdt decides that's enough, and pulls away. They stare into each other's eyes for a long moment. Bertholdt's eyes were searching in his, and it makes Reiner grin lightly. 

“I don't know where this may go”, Bertholdt says gently, eyes falling to Reiner's chest, arms still looped around his neck, “But as long as its mutual, I don't mind where it takes us.”

Reiner nods, not entirely sure what he means. It seems pretty obvious to him, that they both want each other. Why must there be anymore discussion? He doesn't wonder this aloud though. Instead, he remains silent, and watches as Bertholdt draws away from him and offers a light smile. Reiner returns it, and then stands, understanding without words what Bertholdt wants. 

He has to piss anyways. So after escaping into the bathroom, Reiner relieves his bladder. But he pauses, wondering if he should go to bed soon. It was almost ten after the movie, if he wasn't mistaken, so he should go to bed. He was really exhausted anyways. With that thought in mind, Reiner grabs his toothbrush.

After he finished brushing his teeth and washing his face, Reiner leaves the bathroom to find Bertholdt sitting on his bed, now changed into his sleepwear. 

“Bathroom's open if you need it”, Reiner states the obvious, speaking just to clear the tension. Bertholdt raises his eyes from his lap to Reiner, and nods with a small smile, before he stands and walks to the bathroom. Listening to the sound of the door shutting, Reiner approaches his dresser, to retrieve his pyjamas as well. This night was ending a little differently than last night, but Reiner is glad he'll actually get sleep this time.

When Reiner is sitting on his bed, in his tank top and sweatpants with his phone out, Bertholdt emerges from the bathroom. Glancing up, Reiner watches as Bertholdt paces over to the door. When Bertholdt looks over at him, arm raised to the light switch, he opens his mouth to speak.

“Do you mind if I turn off the light?” Bertholdt asks.

“Go ahead”, Reiner replies, and then drops his eyes back to his phone. He thinks this is kind of strange, after making out with him, but this has been weird in general. When the room goes dark and Bertholdt moves onto his bed, Reiner glances back up to watch as Bertholdt pull up his covers and slipped underneath.

“Goodnight”, Reiner hears Bertholdt quietly say.

“Yeah”, Reiner says, and stares over as Bertholdt turns onto his side, facing the wall. Sighing quietly, Reiner drops his gaze and rubs at the back of his neck. He has no reason to be up anymore either, so he puts his phone to sleep, and reaches over to set it on the side table. Then he turns on his alarm with a quiet click. 

He feels like this ended wrong. Incomplete. Something like that. But what could Reiner do, in the end? Nothing, really. And he doesn't want to be pushy. So, silently, Reiner gets under his covers as well and settles into his bed for sleep. 

Things will happen how they will happen. Nothing can change that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Inspiration from: http://mina1914.tumblr.com/post/70183946430/alyssatitties-oh-my-god-the-sexual-tension-from


	25. Chapter 25

“Your elbow is digging into my side. Ow.”

Without an apology, Bertholdt adjusts himself and moves his elbow away from Reiner's midsection. He feels Reiner fidget under him a little, shifting his torso beneath Bertholdt's chest, and then exhales, his breath brushing down over the exposed sliver of Bertholdt's dark skin which peeked out from between his t-shirt and jeans.

Following Reiner's complaint, no other words were spoken. They eased back into the companionable silence that was agreed upon, aside from the occasional page turning or noise heard past the door of the dorm room. Draped sideways across Reiner's bare chest, Bertholdt rests his chin on his fist atop the covers to his bed, eyes drifting back and forth across the page of his book. Reiner had been making attention-seeking exhales the past ten minutes, and it was a little annoying. Reiner must have grown bored with staring at his phone. His hands had been propped on Bertholdt's back, phone clutched in his hands, but now, he was simply pressing random patterns into the clothed fleshy parts of Bertholdt's back.

Another sigh.

“What is it, Reiner,” Bertholdt deadpans, flipping a page with his slender fingers, olive green eyes panning over to look at Reiner's frustrated expression past his shoulder. Reiner slides a hand flatly across Bertholdt's back. It makes Bertholdt's brow furrow.

“I want to touch more than your lips,” Reiner muses, honey eyes sliding up from where his hand resided on Bertholdt's lower back, to his eyes. Bertholdt stares at him, brow raising this time, and then blushes a little. He gives a light glare.

“How suave, Reiner,” Bertholdt says, and turns back to his book. He begins to continue where he left off, face warm. Then he feels the hand on his back slip up under his shirt, over the expanse of his back.

“You know I can be blunt when I want something,” Reiner retorts as he sloppily tugged up Bertholdt's shirt. Bertholdt sighs, and then dog ears his page, shutting his book. He rolls over to face the other, propping up on his elbow. He levels him with an unamused expression. 

“Will you ever let me complete my work? Will I honestly have to go to the library every time?” Bertholdt wonders this with annoyance clear in his tone, as he sits up straight to straddle Reiner's lap. 

Reiner gives him a smug smirk and his hands meander up Bertholdt's half-exposed belly, sliding up his shirt to draw it higher. Bertholdt rolls his eyes, and then grabs the end of his t-shirt to pull it up over his head, momentarily exposing the hair under his arms. He tosses it aside to the hardwood floor. Reiner was staring at his chest and his finely toned abdomen, hands sliding over where his eyes admired, and Bertholdt blushes as he bites at his lip.

As Reiner sits up straighter with the smirk evident on his lips, Bertholdt scoots closer and brings his legs in to situate them around Reiner's waist, like he was crossing his legs. He sighs and lets his arms rest over Reiner's broad shoulders as Reiner's warm hands slide down his sides.

“You're so distracting,” Bertholdt grumbles quietly as he leans in, eyes falling to Reiner's lips as he angles his head. Reiner chuckles in his throat just before Bertholdt connects their lips. 

Although, Bertholdt admits it is pretty nice kissing Reiner. Feeling Reiner's full, slightly chapped lips on his wasn't unappealing in the slightest. Humming softly, Bertholdt lets his hands raise to slide into Reiner's closely cut hair. He feels Reiner's warm hands move across the tan skin of his sides, and it sends pleasant tingles through Bertholdt's skin. 

Its been about a three weeks since Reiner first kissed him the following night upon their return. This was actually the farthest Reiner has undressed him so far. Of course, Reiner had seen him in only his underwear before, but its different when Reiner is the one undressing him. Bertholdt only let the kissing go so far, but Reiner had different intentions.

When out of breath, Bertholdt gently pulls away, hands resting on the slope of Reiner's neck, and opens his eyes to look into Reiner's. With Reiner's hands now on his hips, Bertholdt wonders why he doesn't want the kissing to escalate to something more. Maybe he just doesn't feel that its necessary. People always speak of a hype about sex and touching other people in intimate ways, but Bertholdt thought that it wasn't needed. Couldn't he just simply enjoy Reiner's company without there being a sexual tone to it? Bertholdt preferred just relaxing with the blond in relative silence, enjoying each other. There didn't have to be any kissing. There didn't have to be any sex. 

Bertholdt stares into Reiner's soft honey colored eyes thoughtfully. Why did Reiner always have to make everything avert to kissing? Did Reiner really want him that much? Bertholdt was flattered, but he still wondered if Reiner enjoyed his company in itself as well. 

Smiling a little, Bertholdt then reminds himself that their feelings are mutual. He didn't have to worry as long as he had the other. Reiner had been gazing back at him for a minute, until he angled his head down to mouth at Bertholdt's jawline. Tipping his head to the side, Bertholdt stares at Reiner's bed across the room. He feels Reiner's lips softly mouth at his jaw and neck as Bertholdt thinks about it.

If Reiner really wanted more than just kissing, Bertholdt is fine with doing whatever he wanted. As long as it made Reiner happy, that's all that mattered. He wanted Reiner to be happy, so if it meant letting him get in his pants, so be it. Bertholdt would do almost anything for Reiner to be happy.

Blinking a few times to clear his thoughts, Bertholdt slid his hands lower to let them rest over the bare skin of Reiner's shoulders. He let his eyes close as Reiner kisses at his collarbone. When Reiner softly licks at the skin stretched taut upon the bone, it sends a shiver through Bertholdt. 

Even if Bertholdt didn't necessarily care to let this escalate with Reiner, its not like he wouldn't enjoy it. 

“Bertl,” Reiner says softly, sitting away from what he was doing. Opening his eyes, Bertholdt eyes him warily. Reiner smirks. 

“How often have you done this before? You did mention you had experience..”

Bertholdt blushes a little bit, and then lifts a hand from Reiner's shoulder to rub at the back of his neck as he thinks about it. Well, he did have a boyfriend for a while, and they did have sex a lot, so...Bertholdt was totally unsure. 

He gives a light shrug and a sheepish smile.

“Quite often,” Bertholdt murmurs, dropping his hand from his neck, eyes falling to Reiner's chest. Reiner hums, and then Bertholdt notices that he's leaning in again. Bertholdt lifts his gaze, and shyly watches as Reiner closes the distance to strongly kiss him again. Reiner's compelling hands rested over the warm skin of Bertholdt's cheeks as he kisses him. Exhaling deeply through his nose, Bertholdt melts into the kiss, and draws his hands up to rest them on Reiner's sturdy chest. 

Excited voices echo from the hallway, but they both ignore it, confident with the door securely locked. Bertholdt trembles when Reiner's soft tongue presses into his mouth gently, and Bertholdt meets it warmly with his own. He feels vibrations from Reiner's quiet hums against his lips. 

He liked kissing. It was nice, and intimate, something that could easily be chaste as it could be sexual. Bertholdt didn't mind how it was perceived either way. It still turned him on like fuck, because he was already half-hard. With a rush, he exhales through his nose again and grasps the flesh of Reiner's ~~boobs~~ pectoral muscles in his fingers. Reiner twitches under the touch and it makes Bertholdt smile with amusement. Reiner's tongue slips away, because apparently he's laying back into the bed. His arms were around Bertholdt, so it easily makes Bertholdt follow. 

Leaning over the other, Bertholdt props onto his forearms, gazing down into the eyes of the blond underneath him. He smiles softly. Sliding his hand closer, he draws his fingers up to run them over the side of Reiner's face. Reiner was very handsome. Bertholdt takes a moment to admire him. Reiner must be impatient, gazing up at him with a pouty face, but Bertholdt doesn't pay mind to it. 

Bertholdt muses over the adoration he feels for the other. Fingers caressing Reiner's warm, flushed cheek, Bertholdt gazes down at him with tenderness in his eyes and a gentle smile upon his lips. Bertholdt thinks about how his little crush for the other had escalated to something much more than an infatuation. It wasn't as mild as an _interest_ , but it wasn't strong enough to be called _love_. Bertholdt couldn't fathom his feelings, couldn't capture the entirety of them into words, but the closest description he could think of was an intense adoration. 

With a light smile, Bertholdt rests his fingers over the side of Reiner's head, looking down at his awed expression, before he leans down, angling his head, to kiss him tenderly. Hands slide up his bare back as their tongues thoughtfully meet once again.

Bertholdt's tongue gently presses against Reiner's as he softly caresses his lips with open-mouthed kisses, their chests joined as well. Bertholdt feels entirely warm throughout his body, but more so in his lower abdomen than any other place. He gently grinds his hips down into Reiner's, effectively coaxing a quiet groan from the other. Soft vibrations travel through his lips. Bertholdt props up on his knees a little bit, just so he could slink a hand down across Reiner's tense abs to casually curl his fingers around the girth of Reiner's erection through the pliable fabric of his sweatpants.

He smirks at the corners of his lips when he feels Reiner jerk slightly under him, breath hitching and tongue pausing. Bertholdt thinks its rather cute how responsive he can be. Its encouraging. Bertholdt simply keeps a firm grasp on Reiner's cock as they kiss deeply, Reiner's tongue less controlling and brash. 

It doesn't bother Bertholdt to touch Reiner in this way. In fact, he doesn't mind it at all. Feeling the heat through two layers of fabric is rather arousing, actually. Bertholdt lets his hand raise a little bit, only to slip it under the waistband of his sweatpants. He wasn't wearing underwear.

Breaking the kiss softly, Bertholdt raises his head a little so he could gaze down at the other with a smirk and a raised brow. “Oh, you're so dirty, Reiner. You were planning this, weren't you?” Bertholdt muses as he grabs his cock around the warm shaft. Reiner flushes deeply, and looks away. Bertholdt licks his lips as he processes how truly big he was. Traveling his hand up, he lightly touches around, and then thinks that perhaps the girth makes up for the length. 

“Jesus,” Reiner breathes, and Bertholdt smugly looks down at his closed eyes and furrowed brow with a pleased smile upon his lips. He gives slow pulls finally, and then leans down to continue kissing him. Reiner's lips would falter against his occasionally, pausing as if he could only focus on the sensations lower on his body, but then he would weakly kiss back a moment later.

His hands weren't confidently resting over Bertholdt's back now. Instead, he let them rest on Bertholdt's thighs. Bertholdt knows he himself was hard now, but he didn't bother attending to it. This was about Reiner, after all. He wonders if Reiner is circumcised. He runs his fingers across the head in search of the answer to this wonder. Reiner gasps and his fingers tighten on the flesh of Bertholdt's thighs. Bertholdt licks his dried lips, gazing down at Reiner's tight expression and red cheeks as he pinches around for a foreskin. Nope. There was none. Bertholdt almost laughs when Reiner peeks up at him.

“Stop pinching me. That hurts.”

“You big baby,” Bertholdt giggles and then gives eager tugs to the entirety of his erection again. Reiner deflates as he lets out a heavy exhale, eyes closing again. Bertholdt lets himself watch Reiner's face contort as he caresses at his pectoral muscles again, occasionally teasing at a dark pink nipple while he pulls at his cock. 

Reiner's face was really red, and there was sweat beading at his hairline. Bertholdt feels more adoration than arousal, actually. He likes seeing Reiner come undone like this. And apart from maybe one or two people (Reiner did mention he had received a blowjob before), he was probably the only other person who has seen him like this. It makes Bertholdt feel a warmth surge in his heart. He smiles gently, looking down at the other.

“Fuck,” Reiner hisses, eyes opening with his eyebrows furrowed, gazing up at Bertholdt with a tight expression. Bertholdt looks back down into his lustful eyes, watching his expression. Reiner grasps at Bertholdt's sides with his fingers then, and it makes Bertholdt wince slightly. His fingers were roughly grabbing at the sensitive flesh on his sides, but he tolerates it. Reiner claims he was coming anyways.

After harshly breathing those words, Reiner had shaken like an unstable leaf under him, mouth falling open and head tipping back into the bed as Bertholdt felt a warm, wet sensation meet his fingers and palm. Bertholdt licks his dried lips and swallows thickly, continuing to stroke him with slow tugs, easing the rest out into his hand. When deemed it was enough, Bertholdt slips his hand out. 

Reiner's heavy breathing could be heard from the bathroom, when Bertholdt had left to wash his hands. Bertholdt was uncomfortably hard, and he wanted to touch himself, but not just yet. After he scrubbed his hands clean of the substance painting his skin, he dried his hands on the hand towel, before he left to return to the dorm room. He looks over at Reiner, who was now propped up against the wall with a hand on his forehead. Standing by the foot of his bed, Bertholdt fidgets with his hands, resisting the urge to reach down and relieve the ache in his groin.

“Bertholdt, um. Thanks?” Reiner says, dropping his hand from his forehead to look up at him with a nervous grin. He laughs awkwardly. Bertholdt smiles. Then he takes a seat on the bed beside him, and reaches out to claim the hand that was resting in Reiner's lap. He takes it and then rests their linked hands on the comforter. He strokes his thumb over Reiner's hand.

Reiner was looking at him curiously, head tipped slightly. Bertholdt was about to speak, but Reiner beats him to it.

“Oh, wait, let me return the favor.”

Before Bertholdt can respond, Reiner leans over and boldly grasps him through the fabric of his jeans. 

“Yeah, let me do it,” Reiner demands, eyes raising to meet Bertholdt's. Bertholdt breaks into a nervous sweat, and shakily looks into Reiner's eyes. When Reiner scoots closer to him and slips his hand down his pants, Bertholdt squeaks and jumps away. Standing now, Bertholdt shakes his head as Reiner looks at him with a confused expression. 

“N-no, its okay. Its not a big deal.”

Reiner looks frustrated as he beckons him forward.

“C'mon, dude, seriously, I want to.”

Bertholdt shakes his head again, stubbornly quiet. Reiner gives him an irritated look, but then just shrugs, and sits back. 

“Okay. Whatever you prefer.”

After a long moment of silence and hesitation on Bertholdt's part, Bertholdt finally slips back to the bed and takes a careful seat. He wasn't as aroused as he was before, so its not a problem. He peeks over at Reiner. Reiner was watching him with a set brow and stern eyes. 

Bertholdt tenses up, but doesn't shy away from the stare. Instead, he gazes back into his golden eyes. After a long, tense minute of silence, Bertholdt drops his eyes from Reiner's and sighs. He brings his legs up onto the bed and scoots over to him. Reiner's hard expression softens when Bertholdt approaches to curl his tan arms around his shoulders. 

“Can you still hold me?” Bertholdt whispers, resting his chin on Reiner's head, propped up on his knees. He was embarrassed to ask such a thing, but its what he wants. Reiner could at least do that for him. He doesn't need Reiner to please him in a sexual way. Bertholdt would rather cuddle instead, really. 

Reiner head nods under his chin, and Bertholdt feels warm arms hook around his midsection. He slips down to rest on his shins, now a little more eye level to the other. He smiles sheepishly, with embarrassment, and then leans in to press a sweet kiss to Reiner's cheek. Reiner smiles when Bertholdt pulls back.

Then Bertholdt eases away from the embrace to lay back onto the pillow. Reiner follows, but not as smoothly. He falls down onto the comforter beside the other. Bertholdt laughs much like a gleeful giggle when Reiner grabs him around the waist and tugs him towards himself. Bertholdt grins when Reiner nuzzles his face into Bertholdt's neck.

“Stupid,” Bertholdt muses in a cheerful tone when Reiner inhales his scent obnoxiously. Reiner gives chuckles as Bertholdt turns around in the ring of Reiner's bare arms to press his back against Reiner's chest. He slips down a little bit to fit more snugly against him. Reiner's chest pressed against him with each inhale. It was very comforting, actually. Bertholdt sighs gratefully, and closes his eyes. 

The soft ticking of the clock fills the silence that follows. Bertholdt's smiling face softens to a laxness after a few minutes. He feels sleepy due to the comfort of Reiner's embrace, and the warmth surrounding him. Sighing quietly, Bertholdt realizes that maybe he should go back to his work.

Maybe a few more minutes wouldn't hurt.

\----------

Sitting at one of the many tables in the library with Marco, Bertholdt was focused entirely on the homework his professors assigned, hand buried in his dark locks with frustration. He hated Math. Across from him, Marco was reading a book, his own notebook opened beside his arm on the table. Bertholdt knows Marco was good at Math, but Bertholdt wanted to try and understand it himself. He just really didn't want to deal with it now.

After about ten more minutes of intense self belittling and frustration, he was interrupted by Marco's cheerful voice breaking the long stretch of silence. 

“Hey, you've gotten pretty close with Reiner, huh?”

Looking up from his open book with his hands hidden in the messy locks of his hair, Bertholdt peeks out at him past his raised forearms with a cocked brow. Where did that come from? He searches in Marco's eye for a reason to why he was asking such an abrupt thing. Shrugging, Bertholdt flicks his eyes down to Marco's open book momentarily, before meeting his eye again.

“I guess. We've been roommates for a while. Why?”

Marco was smiling now, eye shining with amusement. He gives a light shrug as well.

“I dunno. Just noticed, I guess. Reiner seems more relaxed around you, is all. That's good!” Marco muses and then drops his gaze back down to his book again, readjusting his hand on holding it down. Bertholdt stares at him for a moment, dropping his hands from his hair, and furrows his brow. Okay, then. 

Bertholdt eventually returns to his goddamn Math homework that refuses to cooperate with his thinking process. 

 

That same day when Bertholdt had returned to the dorm room with a caramel frappuccino in his hand, he was pleasantly surprised to find Reiner sitting on his bed with his laptop open. When he had noisily unlocked the door and shoved into the room, Reiner had glanced up at him, with a grin shortly meeting his lips.

“Hey, Bertl. Welcome back,” Reiner had called as Bertholdt shuffled in. Bertholdt glanced at him and then returned the smile as he quietly greeted him in return. After slipping his key back into his jean's pocket and unraveling his scarf, he locked the door behind him and set his scarf on his desk. He took a long drink of his frap as he paced over to where Reiner was sitting. Gazing down at the other with the green straw situated between his lips, Bertholdt takes notice of how Reiner was wearing his sleepwear already. Looking over his shoulder at the clock on the far wall, Bertholdt reads the time.

Maybe Reiner just didn't intend to go out later. That was perfectly fine with Bertholdt. In fact, that was good. Bertholdt really enjoyed it when Reiner stayed in the dorm room with him, rather than being out with his friends.

“How was your day?” Bertholdt asks lightly as he sets his caramel frap down on Reiner's side table to remove his coat. He glances at Reiner as he walks away to drape his coat over the back of his chair at his desk. Reiner hums as he types something on his laptop.

“It was fine. What about you, babe?”

Pausing, Bertholdt stops mid-step towards Reiner's bed. Reiner noticed what he had said too, and jerked his head up. Then he began to blush and raised his hands to nervously shake them as he loudly says, “Shit! Sorry sorry, pretend I didn't say that. Fuck!” Bertholdt felt his face grow hot with embarrassment and secret happiness as he quietly paces over to Reiner's bed. 

“S'fine,” Bertholdt mumbles with a shy smile on his lips, and holds his hands behind his back as he stands before the other with his foot nervously scuffing at the hardwood floor. Reiner was staring at his screen with a furrowed brow and a flushed face, mouth tightly curled into an embarrassed frown. He occasionally flicked his eyes up to Bertholdt, but quickly dropped them again when he realized Bertholdt was watching him. Bertholdt thought it was cute how he became so flustered over something that Bertholdt actually was happy about. 

“Do you usually call your girlfriends that?”

Reiner snaps his hands up to hide his face behind them. Bertholdt grins with his cheeks growing even more hot, watching Reiner as he grows progressively more embarrassed. Reiner moans against his hands before he miserably mumbles, “Yes..”

Laughing softly, Bertholdt finally takes a gentle seat beside him on the bed, raising an arm from behind his back to slide his fingers into Reiner's hair. When Reiner looks over at him with a red face, lowering his hands, Bertholdt offers a soft smile. 

“I don't mind if you call me that. Its not something to be embarrassed about. Although, don't call me that in public. That would be embarrassing for me, then.”

Bertholdt drops his hand and Reiner glares at him mildly.

“I'm not intending to call you that! I just accidentally let it slip..”, Reiner grumbles, crossing his arms. Bertholdt nods, and smiles a little. He nods, not really minding if Reiner didn't want to call him that. Actually, it was kind of embarrassing on his part too, but whatever. He exhales.

“Do you mind if I sit on your bed with you while I read?” Bertholdt asks a moment later, and Reiner nods without a word. So, with a nervous smile on his lips (he always seemed to smile more around Reiner), Bertholdt stood again and walked over to where he dropped his bag on his bed.

Once retrieving his book, he quietly walked over to Reiner's bed again, and claimed a seat beside the blond. Although, he didn't look at Reiner's screen, of course. Because that is really rude. Bertholdt settles against the wall beside Reiner and opens his book in search of the dog-eared page.

After about thirty minutes of quiet page turning and typing, Bertholdt had wound up across Reiner's lap, with his book raised above his head. Reiner could still see past his arms to his laptop screen, so it wasn't a problem. Reiner had laughed when Bertholdt first draped himself across his thighs, but now they both eased back into a comfortable silence. 

Bertholdt thought this was the more enjoyable way to spend time together. 

And once Reiner had claimed he was tired as hell and he was bored of his laptop, Bertholdt realized it was almost eleven at night, and that he should go to bed like, instantly. So after sitting up from Reiner's lap with a grunt, Bertholdt had stood to approach his desk. After he had bookmarked his page and set it aside, he stretched out his aching muscles with another groan. Then he grabbed his pyjamas from his dresser and began to change as Reiner went into the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face.

In the end, they would up sleeping together on Reiner's bed, in the mess of blankets and pillows, with Bertholdt tucked in Reiner's arms.


	26. Chapter 26

The date of her death rolled by shortly after the return to Uni. Bertholdt had received a text from Annie, but nothing from his dad. Annie was just telling him not to be down about it, as she usually said on this date. As well as saying that at least his mother was peaceful in Heaven, that he should focus more on the good things rather than the bad. 

He's dealt with this date the past many years, so it wasn't that different. Bertholdt didn't have the time to visit her grave, and plus, he didn't want to meet his dad there. He rather solemnly look at pictures of her on his laptop, pictures that he pulled from his dad's camera. Luckily, they all were of her smiling. 

Sitting in class for the day was kind of discouraging, and it was bothering him. He still forced himself to take notes, and he still urged himself to pay attention. And maybe it was a good thing, seeing as it took his mind off of his mother. 

At the end of his last class, he felt kind of tired and dreading. He didn't want to have to dwell over his feelings and memories for the entire day, but he always did, in the end. He did consider getting coffee for both himself and Reiner, but decided against it. His wallet didn't need it, and neither did he. So, he hurried to the dormitory building.

 

He plans on just lazing around in bed as he takes out his key and unlocks the dorm door. When inside, he turns on the light, before quietly shutting the door behind himself. Looking over, he spots Reiner sleeping soundly on his bed, limbs sprawled out. Reiner was sick, so he had missed class today. When he had first gotten ill, Bertholdt had done pretty much the same as Reiner had done for him before. He got him soup, tea, and made sure to be extra quiet as he slept. Reiner was just out the majority of the time he was sick. Maybe he was one of those people that just slept through it.

Stepping into the room, Bertholdt pulls off his coat and scarf, draping them over his chair, before he toes off his shoes and approaches Reiner's unconscious figure on his bed. He pulls up a chair, and takes a quiet seat by his bedside. Sighing, Bertholdt reaches out to draw his fingers over the side of Reiner's flushed face. Then he gently moves them up into Reiner's slightly sweaty bangs. He sets his hand over his forehead. Still warm. It wasn't as hot as it was before, though. That's good.

Bertholdt's eyes soften as he looks over at Reiner's sleeping face, lifting his hand to stroke it over his blond hair. He remains that way for a long moment, propping his chin in his palm, elbow on his knee, and simply watches the other sleep. 

But then shortly, Reiner's eyes wander under his eyelids, brow furrowing. Drawing his hand back, Bertholdt worries he woke him. He must have, because Reiner opens his eyes tiredly to look over at Bertholdt. And this whole time Bertholdt thought he was a heavy sleeper.

“Hey,” Reiner grumbles with a cracked voice, and smiles softly. 

“Hey,” Bertholdt murmurs, gazing down at him with gentle eyes, sitting back a little. Reiner's smile lowers as he gazes over at the other. He props up on an elbow slowly, his blanket sliding down to reveal his bare chest, his golden eyes fixed on Bertholdt's face.

“Bertl, you okay?” Reiner asks gently, eyes searching in Bertholdt's. Mildly surprised, Bertholdt blinks a few times and then gives a light shrug. 

“Were you even sleeping? It usually takes more than just a touch to wake you up,” Bertholdt muses, hoping the topic would change. He hated it when people asked him that. Its like, he has to chose to be truthful, or to just say something positive. Reiner's worried expression lessens at that, and he even smiles a tiny bit.

“I was just resting.”

Bertholdt blushes. 

“And you didn't answer my question.”

Bertholdt frowns.

Reiner watches him expectantly, brows raised and eyes fixed on his. Bertholdt sighs and raises a hand to rub at his brow. Then he drops that hand and huffs.

“I'm _fine_. I'm just not in a good mood.”

“Why's that?”

Bertholdt almost glares at him. Why did he have to be so caring?

“Because its the anniversary of my mother's death.”

Eyebrows raising once more, Reiner's eyes jump back and forth between his own, searching. He then sits up straighter and says with a worrisome tone in his voice, “Hey, I'm sorry. If you didn't want to talk about it..” He looks concerned, with his eyebrows furrowed and mouth in a light frown. Bertholdt offers a soft smile, and shrugs, hands fiddling nervously in his lap.

“Its no big deal.”

There was a long pause, of Reiner watching him, scrutinizing him, and then he sighs softly, before he rubs at the back of his neck. He sniffs a few times before speaking once more.

“..I hope you don't mind me asking..but how did she die?”

Reiner glances warily up at the other, dropping his hand from his neck as he gazes over at him. Bertholdt drops his eyes to his feet on the floor, and licks his dried lips nervously, an unpleasant, nervous heat building in his face. Those distant, fuzzy memories swarm back, and his throat seizes up. He swallows thickly, trying to quell that feeling. Silence remains in the room for a long minute, the thickness of it suffocating. But Bertholdt finds his voice, and sighs.

“She was mauled by a bear.” Bertholdt says, flicking his eyes to Reiner, who was watching him silently and with a set expression. Reiner blinks with surprise at that, sitting back slightly. 

“How did that happen..?”

Bertholdt smiles weakly, before he says, “I went out into the woods as a kid and she went looking for me. We encountered a bear on our way back. I made it, my mother didn't.” Bertholdt blinks away unwanted wetness in his eyes and then shrugs. Reiner was looking rather unsure of what to say. 

“I'm sorry,” Reiner decides on saying. Bertholdt almost laughs wryly, as if he hadn't heard that a million times before, but he holds it back. He only smiles and stands. He hadn't expected to talk about it, but whatever. He doesn't like to be reminded of the fact it was his fault his mother died.

Sighing, Bertholdt rubs at his eyes, before he drops his hand to tiredly look down at Reiner, who was watching him with worry evident in his honey colored irises. “I need a shower,” Bertholdt says in explanation, before he turns to approach the door. Reiner doesn't say anything as Bertholdt pulls on his shoes again. 

\----------

Within three days, Bertholdt eventually stops thinking endlessly about his mother and her death, and moves back into focusing on school and his studies. Reiner is no longer sick by then, and so on the nights they focus on work, he goes with Bertholdt to the library to go over material.

Bertholdt manages to stay focused for the first hour and a half, before Reiner grows bored and starts groping Bertholdt in places he would rather not be groped. After Grope #8, Bertholdt had grown tired of kicking Reiner in the shin, seeing as it wouldn't get the dumb blond to stop, so Bertholdt shuts his book, and stands. Reiner follows after him as he trudges out of the private room with stomps of his feet and a heavy glare upon his features. Bertholdt wasn't only frustrated over the fact Reiner had distracted him from working, but he was also annoyed with the fact he was sporting a rather uncomfortable erection, as they made their way back to the dormitory building.

“You're a dick,” Bertholdt says as soon as they make it to their room, books landing with a loud smack on his desk when he tosses them onto it. Reiner laughs as he shuts and locks the door behind himself. 

“I know you've forgiven me already,” Reiner muses as he sets his books on Bertholdt's bed to his right, kicking off his shoes. Bertholdt turns and approaches him to grasp his hands on Reiner's cheeks, demanding, and quietly says, “Maybe.” Then he rather boldly presses his lips down onto Reiner's. Reiner was grinning against his lips, and it was pissing him off. But what was pissing him off even more was that Reiner got him going like that, and then acted like it wasn't a concern.

Their lips move together, noses bumping and teeth hitting painfully against teeth, until Bertholdt breaks it with a sharp inhale of breath. Reiner was panting too as he smirks up at Bertholdt. Bertholdt stares down at Reiner's kissed lips and then feels Reiner's warm hands begin to pull up his sweater. 

“Bed first,” Bertholdt murmurs, letting his face go and stepping back so he wouldn't corner Reiner against the door. Reiner's hands fall from his waist, and then he moves past him to take a seat on Bertholdt's bed. After pulling off his shoes, Bertholdt follows, and smoothly claims a seat on Reiner's lap. Reiner was still grinning like an idiot. Bertholdt gives Reiner an unamused expression as Reiner pulls on his shirt again.

Bertholdt smacks his hands away and pulls it off over his head instead. He lets it fall to the floor, and then feels Reiner begin to work on the belt to his jeans. Bertholdt lets it happen as he rests his arms around Reiner's shoulders, leaning in to kiss him again. Reiner's lips press back into his as he pulls on the buckle to his belt, and then shortly the button and zipper to his pants. Bertholdt draws his fingers softly into Reiner's short blond hair, kissing him gently as Reiner reaches into his pants. He gives a slight jerk at the hand rubbing him past the fabric of his boxers, but then melts into it. Bertholdt breaks the kiss, and rests his forehead against Reiner's, fingers curling in his hair. Reiner's lips were slightly open, his breath brushing out in quiet pants against Bertholdt's cheek. 

“I want you,” Bertholdt murmurs, keeping his eyes closed. He feels lips against his, so he kisses back softly. 

Bertholdt retracts his arms from around Reiner's neck to slip his hands down. He grabs at the hem of Reiner's t-shirt and draws it up. Reiner breaks away, Bertholdt opening his eyes, and raises his arms so Bertholdt can tug it off. Reiner gives him a smirk and moves his warm hands around Bertholdt's waist, easing down his jeans and underwear with short tugs. There wasn't much room to pull them off seeing as Bertholdt was straddling him, so Bertholdt gets up from his lap, pushing his hands away, and steps out of his jeans. Reiner sweeps his eyes briefly over him as Bertholdt steps up to reach over and work on the belt and button to Reiner's jeans as well. Reiner raises his hands to cup Bertholdt's face, and Bertholdt leans in to knowingly press their lips together once more.

When Bertholdt pulls repeatedly on Reiner's jeans, Reiner gets the hint and lifts his hips so Bertholdt can yank them off. Then Bertholdt gets on his lap again and they're kissing once more. Reiner's warm hands were resting on Bertholdt's sides. Bertholdt was cupping Reiner's cheeks as their lips moved.

After a minute, Bertholdt breaks away with a sharp inhale, a playful grin on his lips. Then he says softly, “This makes me wonder why you're into me.”

“Why's that?” Reiner asks with an equally amused smirk tugging on his lips.

“Well..,” Bertholdt murmurs, sliding his hands down Reiner's neck, eyes glancing over Reiner's striking facial features, “You're you...and I'm me.” Reiner cocks a brow at first, smirk softening, and then he gets it.

“Bertl. Come on,” Reiner begins with an unamused expression, voice blank with displeasure. Bertholdt blushes and ducks his head down a little, biting at his lip. He shouldn't have said anything. Reiner scoffs quietly, before speaking once more.

“You know how attractive you are. So please, don't make me repeat myself.”

Glancing up shyly past his bangs, Bertholdt looks at him, slightly awed and flattered. Reiner was blushing, too, but his eyes were stern. Bertholdt smiles and leans in to give a sweet peck to his lips. Reiner returns it.

“You,” Bertholdt begins a moment later, hesitating, and when Reiner looks at him with a smile, Bertholdt forces himself to finish, “mean a lot to me. I hope you know that.” Reiner grins and laughs softly, nodding before leaning in to kiss him deeply once again. Bertholdt relaxes his tense shoulders and rests his hands over the sides of Reiner's neck as they share lips. 

Admittedly, they spend too much time kissing. Bertholdt doesn't consider going further, this is all he needs, but Reiner seems to want to progress it. He grabs at Bertholdt's erection through his boxers, and it makes the taller boy jerk slightly. Reiner was the one to break the kiss to speak.

“Let me suck your cock,” he murmurs, eyes lustful as he looks into Bertholdt's eyes. Bertholdt blushes up to his ears at that, and his mouth falls open. He doesn't know what to say. At first, he actually thinks about the pros and cons of that suggestion, but really, the pros were outweighing the cons. He then nods silently, blushing, and it makes Reiner grin. 

“Condom, first,” Bertholdt insists, eyes flicking to and from Reiner's, cheeks tainted a delicate pink. Reiner nods, and gestures for Bertholdt to get up. Silently, Bertholdt slips off his lap and takes a seat on the bed. Reiner reaches over to pull open the drawer and reach in. Furrowing his brow, Bertholdt watches as Reiner sits back with a strip of condoms and breaks one off.

“And why do you have condoms in your night stand?” Bertholdt prods with a teasing tone as Reiner returns the others to their previous place. Reiner hums and averts his gaze to him. He smirks, and quirks a brow, “Do you have to ask?”

“Well, I just wasn't aware you had girls coming in left and right, Reiner.”

“Moron, I bought them for us.”

Bertholdt pauses at that, blushes, and it only makes Reiner's grin extend. Reiner pats him on the thigh.

Reiner then moves off of the bed to get on his knees between Bertholdt's. “Don't have high expectations,” he says as he settles between his thighs, ripping open the condom. Bertholdt bites at his lip, and then he lets out a heavy exhale that resembles a laugh. “I don't know what to expect from you, so,” Bertholdt admits as Reiner works on sliding his boxers down his tan, hairy thighs. He feels his face grow really hot when his erection is exposed both to the cold air and Reiner's vision. Bertholdt props back onto his hands as Reiner works on getting his boxers out of the way. Reiner was staring rather obnoxiously at his penis. Bertholdt begins to raise his knees, but Reiner notices and places his hands flatly on Bertholdt's thighs, forcing his knees back down.

“Hey, hey. None of that.”

Bertholdt feels his heart hammer in his chest, fingers curling into the fabric of the comforter as he murmurs, “Okay. Just stop staring so much..”

Reiner looks up into his eyes with a grin on his lips, “How do you expect me not to stare when your cock is really pretty like that?” Bertholdt kicks him in the side for that and it makes Reiner wheeze and then laugh. Bertholdt huffs and looks away.

“Well I think your boobs are pretty,” Bertholdt grumbles back, and Reiner smacks him on the thigh.

“Hey, too far.”

They both laugh, although Bertholdt grows silent sooner when Reiner shifts closer and reaches between his thighs to grab him around the shaft. After sliding the condom on (which fit well enough), Reiner casts Bertholdt a brief glance, before he leans in.

“Oh,” Bertholdt breathes when Reiner draws his tongue up the flushed dark skin. Reiner was already goddamn smirking like the smug dumbass he is, as if that little syllable boosted his ego to the heavens. With the encouragement, Reiner adjusts himself between Bertholdt's thighs and leans in to capture the pink head in his mouth this time.

It seems Reiner isn't dismayed in the least by the fact he was sucking a dick, and gets to work.

Bertholdt doesn't remember Reiner mentioning he had experience with that kind of thing, but maybe he could be Reiner's first when it came to dick sucking. This time Reiner would not be on the receiving end. Why did Reiner even suggest doing this? Did he want to do this? Maybe its obvious. Bertholdt doesn't have time to think about it, his thoughts are wiped clean as Reiner teased him with open-mouthed kisses to the shaft.

Bertholdt was trying to keep his breathing level as he watched Reiner swipe his tongue over the rather sensitive nerves on the head, his hands grabbing tight fistfuls of the covers. Bertholdt gnaws at his bottom lip, trying to repress any noises that threaten to escape. Reiner was trying to take some more into his mouth now. Bertholdt moans quietly, breathlessly, eyes falling shut as Reiner's warm, wet mouth encases his erection. He spreads his thighs wider. Reaching one of his hands up, Bertholdt lightly rests it upon Reiner's head, sliding his fingers into his hair. He gasps when Reiner applies a harsher suction. 

Honestly, Reiner doesn't take much in, but that's fine. Bertholdt understands its his first time, and really, he wasn't that far off anyways. Kissing previously got him hot and bothered, so he doesn't need much. In fact, he worries he might end it too soon. Reiner was looking up at him now, tongue rubbing over the tip so he can catch his breath. Bertholdt hopes his face isn't too embarrassing, but Reiner looks pleased, so it probably is. 

Bertholdt was giving quiet moans now, the pleasure letting his tongue become looser. He eases back onto his elbow, fingers gently sliding through Reiner's hair. Reiner was taking him in his mouth again, tongue rubbing along the underside as he applies a suction that makes Bertholdt crane his head back. As he lets out heavy pants, Bertholdt raises his head again and bites his lip.

“Gonna come,” Bertholdt says softly, gaze fixed lazily down on what Reiner was doing. Reiner's honey colored eyes flick up to him. Bertholdt licks his lips and Reiner backs off a little, keeping just the head in his mouth. He watches Bertholdt as he sucks, one of his warm hands drawn up to curl his fingers around the flushed shaft, giving slow strokes.

Bertholdt comes with a quiet noise in his throat, eyebrows furrowing as his eyes clench shut, hips shifting and fidgeting. His thighs shake. Reiner sits away, and wipes his lips off with the back of his hand, eyes curiously watching Bertholdt, hopeful that he did good. Bertholdt pants heavily, lounging back on his elbows with his head resting against his shoulder. When he hears Reiner stand and walk away, Bertholdt opens his eyes to see Reiner going into the bathroom. He takes the chance to sit up and take off the condom. After shakily tying it, he stands and approaches the bin by Reiner's desk to discard it.

A minute later, after Bertholdt had pulled on his boxers again and took a seat on his bed once more, Reiner emerged after he had supposedly brushed his teeth. 

“Come here,” Bertholdt says, sitting straighter, watching Reiner shyly as he pats the seat beside him. Reiner offers him a smile as he takes a seat beside him. Then Bertholdt leans over and kisses him, a hand resting over one of Reiner's biceps. Reiner returns it and they kiss softly until Bertholdt reaches over and gropes him through his underwear. Reiner pauses in the kissing and when he does continue, its with an eagerness. Bertholdt briefly matches that eagerness, but breaks away after a moment to watch as he pulls down his briefs, revealing his darkly flushed cock. Reiner sucks in a breath when Bertholdt curls a hand around it and gives strong, slow strokes with twists of his wrist.

Bertholdt's lip curl slightly into a smirk as he watches Reiner's face flush and his eyebrows furrow. Reiner was watching him, too. Bertholdt continues the slow pace of pulling on his erection as he leans in to kiss him softly once again. He feels Reiner rest a hand over the back of his neck. 

Suddenly there's loud footsteps running past their door and yelling, and it makes Reiner jump, their lips separating. Opening his eyes, Bertholdt smiles in amusement at Reiner's startled expression. Laughing, Bertholdt stops his hand and grins. Reiner glares at him.

“Hey, do continue,” he grumbles, pulling Bertholdt in for another kiss. Bertholdt thought it was kinda cute how he was restless. Maybe he was just paranoid of being caught. Bertholdt would rather avoid the trouble it would bring, too. He locked the door earlier, anyways. The sounds of their lips moving break the silence as Bertholdt continues to touch him.

Eventually Reiner grows breathless and sits away, panting quietly as he looks down to watch Bertholdt give quick pulls on his cock. Bertholdt looks at him for a moment, enamored with his flushed face and red bitten lips. Then he leans in to mouth softly at Reiner's jawline. 

“Fuck,” Reiner hisses, Bertholdt feeling him buck his hips into his hand. Bertholdt feels a warmth in his belly. Could he honestly get hard again? Reiner was just really sexy, and it was turning him on again. Bertholdt gives one last kiss to Reiner's neck before he looks over to watch his hand move over Reiner's arousal. There was some pre-cum easing out, so it helped with the strokes.

“Bertholdt,” Reiner whispers, earning Bertholdt's shy gaze. Reiner was watching him with hazy eyes and red, sore lips. He leans in, so Bertholdt angles his head so they can kiss properly. Reiner hums into his lips, Bertholdt feeling a hand touch the small of his back. Bertholdt grows breathless just as Reiner slides his tongue into his mouth. He has to pull away to pant, opening his eyes to see Reiner watching him with a flushed face and a furrowed brow. 

Silently, Bertholdt gazes into his soft honey colored irises, hand slowing as he admires his eyes. He licks his wet lips nervously. Reiner doesn't complain about the slowed pace, and only looks back at Bertholdt. Bertholdt lets his gaze linger for a moment, before he slowly leans in to kiss him again. Reiner exhales against his lips before he returns it. Bertholdt's hand had paused as their tongues meet, lips pressed together as their tongues moved.

Then Bertholdt realized he had stopped, so he begins to pull at his wet erection again, coaxing a muffled moan from Reiner. Bertholdt feels Reiner's mouth pause against his, and then a moment later Reiner does pull away to suck in a sharp breath, eyes falling to Bertholdt's hand. Bertholdt pants quietly as he watches Reiner's face. 

Reiner moans again, mouth falling open, before he bucks his hips into Bertholdt's hand. Bertholdt sees Reiner's brow furrow and his teeth clench as a warm, wet sensation meets his fingers and palm. Bertholdt looks down to see Reiner's semen painted on his fingers. 

Reiner's pants are loud and breathless as he sinks back onto his elbows on the bed, head craned back as he comes down from it. Bertholdt smiles lightly at him, before he stands and walks into the bathroom. He washes his hands, and looks up into the mirror at himself. His face was flushed and his lips were red and bitten. His appearance makes him flush a darker pink. He leaves the bathroom after ripping off some toilet paper.

Returning to Reiner, he tosses it over to him. Reiner looks up at him, still breathing rather heavily, and grabs it. He wipes himself off as Bertholdt takes a quiet seat beside him. After balling the toilet paper up, Reiner tosses it at the bin by his desk. It doesn't go far. Bertholdt is a little bothered by the fact Reiner isn't going to get up and throw it away, but whatever. He instead watches silently as Reiner pulls his briefs back up. 

“I think,” Reiner begins, setting his hands on the bed by his sides, glancing over at Bertholdt, “That the others don't need to know about this.” Bertholdt looks at him, quiet, unsure of what to say. Instead, a question blooms in his mind.

“..This?”

Reiner purses his lips and then smiles. He leans in to give a quick, chaste kiss to Bertholdt's lips. Bertholdt lightly returns it, and then warily watches the other when he sits back. Reiner's hand reached out to touch him on the forearm.

“Us.”

Bertholdt nods, eyes dropping to the floor.

“Okay.”

When he feels Reiner kiss his cheek and then stand from the bed, Bertholdt raises his gaze to him. He watches as Reiner walks over to his own bed, reaching over to snatch his sweat pants off of it to pull them on.

Bertholdt glances down at their jeans left discarded on the floor. He should get back to his homework. So, he stands and grabs his pants before he tugs them on. Reiner had left to the bathroom. After pulling on his shirt and a sweater, Bertholdt glances over at the closed door, and then walks over to his desk to grab his books. 

He can just text Reiner. Reiner can come later if he wanted to.

So after casting his eyes back at the door again, hearing the sink running, he pulls on his shoes and leaves the room, books hoisted in his arms. Once he locks the door, he turns and begins down the hallway. Maybe he'll get more work done, now that Reiner won't be pestering him any longer. 

\----------

Apparently, Bertholdt notices, each time they're in the dorm room together for the next week, Reiner comes onto him and they do the same routine of blowing each other and getting each other off. Bertholdt doesn't entirely understand it, because its all they really do, besides occasionally getting coffee or studying together. Sometimes they meet in the lounge room with their friends, and do whatever, but Reiner doesn't really touch him during those times out of the room. Unless it can be concealed, otherwise he turns away from Bertholdt's attempts at a brief kiss when they're sitting at a table in a corner of the library, or eases his hand out from Bertholdt's when they walk side by side to the Starbucks. 

Bertholdt feels disappointed and confused each time Reiner rejects him, but maybe Reiner just was paranoid of being seen. Bertholdt didn't care that much if people knew, but maybe Reiner was worrying about taunts or harassment. But then again, Reiner was seen as straight to others. 

One day during Honors English, Bertholdt almost slipped it out to Marco. He almost told him that he and Reiner were now a “thing”, too. But what thing exactly was that? That's what made Bertholdt pause, hesitating, even when Marco was watching him expectantly. In the end, he said nevermind, and mulled over it for the remainder of the class. He decided that he may as well ask Reiner the next time he sees him. Its not something to discuss over text.

But he reminds himself he should think positively about it all. At least he even had Reiner to begin with. At least Reiner returned those feelings.

At least it was mutual.


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Warning** : Mention of self-harming, scars, etc

Following his decision with confronting Reiner about it, Bertholdt had shortly returned to the dorm room after his last class of the day, but found Reiner missing. It wasn't that surprising. It was Friday, so Reiner was probably out with his friends already. Bertholdt doesn't become too discouraged over it. He has the entire weekend, anyways.

But hours had passed since he came back, and in the end, Bertholdt became too tired and it was getting too late to wait any longer. He did send a text asking where he was, but he didn't get a reply. So, he went to bed, thinking that in the morning he could ask Reiner.

 

When he woke up at nine in the morning, he first blinked the sleepiness out of his eyes, sat up, and ran a hand through his untamed locks as he looked over at Reiner's bed. The recognizable mound of blankets was atop it, a head of blond hair peeking out. Bertholdt sighs and rubs at his eyes as he slips out of his bed. The pant legs to his pyjamas were rolled up to his knees, and it was irritating, but he was more focused on going from point A, to point B. Those being his bed, and Reiner's. 

Approaching the lump of blankets, he nudges it with his hand as he mumbles, “Scoot over.”

He knows that would definitely not wake him, but the blob does shuffle closer to the wall beside the bed. Maybe Reiner was already awake. Thankful he wouldn't have to raise his voice, Bertholdt tiredly slips onto the bed beside the other, and then a wave of blankets swarms him. He squawks and then darkness surrounds him. He hears a pained grunt. Bertholdt had accidentally swung his leg out in surprise. When warm, bare arms wrap around him, Bertholdt blushes, his face growing warm when he's pulled against Reiner's chest. 

“Good morning,” is groggily mumbled by his ear. Bertholdt smiles shyly and remains quiet. After a long minute of silence, save for Reiner's soft breathing, Bertholdt realizes that it is growing rapidly hot under the many blankets. He feels over-heated and the air is thick and suffocating, so he shoves the blankets down, sucking in a breath of fresh air. He looks over and sees Reiner's eyes clenching shut and mouth twisting in a grimace.

“Why do you insist on burying yourself under three blankets?” Bertholdt murmurs as he turns onto his side under Reiner's arm, facing him. Reiner's eyes slowly blink open, short hair tousled and messy, and he gives a weak smile. He leans in, Bertholdt pulling away out of reflex before pausing, and hides his face in Bertholdt's neck. “Its how I've always slept, so I dunno,” Reiner says, voice thick and slightly cracked with sleepiness.

“Even during the summer?”

“Well, not with three blankets, but yeah.”

Bertholdt doesn't say anything more, instead rests his chin over Reiner's head. He hears Reiner inhale deeply through his nose. There was a long pause, and then Reiner scoots back to look down at Bertholdt's chest. Bertholdt watches him warily.

Then Reiner's golden eyes raise to his.

“Are you wearing my hoodie?”

Bertholdt's face warms as he nods. “I wear it when it gets too cold during the night..,” Bertholdt says, eyes anxiously averting from Reiner's. There is a brief pause. Bertholdt worriedly wonders if this upsets Reiner, if he honestly didn't mind if Bertholdt used it, but the concern is brushed away when Reiner presses their lips together abruptly. Bertholdt, startled, makes a noise in his throat as Reiner's full lips try to get a response out of his own. Bertholdt doesn't react at first, hands raising dubiously.

Shyly, Bertholdt eventually kisses back, brow furrowing as he presses his hands into Reiner's chest. Bertholdt hesitatingly returns the kiss until Reiner's tongue slips across his lip, making him jump. He pulls away, face flushed, and meets Reiner's eyes. Bertholdt sighs.

“Can't I brush my teeth first?” he mumbles, licking his lips absentmindedly. He slides his hands up over Reiner's bare shoulders as Reiner gives him a pout. Bertholdt smiles, and relaxes back into the blankets, bringing his hands up to rest them by his head, eyes fixed on the other. Reiner watches him for a moment, before his eyes drift down. Bertholdt feels a heaviness in his eyes so he closes them with a sigh. He just woke up, so he was still drowsy, and he doesn't want to have to get up and brush his teeth just to kiss him. They do it often enough. But, it doesn't change the fact he was self-conscious about morning breath. He kinda felt like going back to sleep, actually..

He feels Reiner shift beside him, and then a hand rests over his belly. Cracking a eye open, Bertholdt sees Reiner leaning over him with a light smile. Bertholdt blushes, gazes up at him, and watches silently as he leans down to softly kiss him once more. Bertholdt doesn't feel like complaining this time. He keeps his hands by his head as he kisses him lightly, eyes closing. Reiner's warm hand slips up under the hoodie and Bertholdt's t-shirt. Bertholdt shifts under him and brings his hands up to hold Reiner's cheeks, brow furrowing when he feels Reiner's hand lightly touch his tummy.

Reiner then breaks the kiss, leaning back to look down at him, and Bertholdt feels embarrassed so he drops his hands and looks away. Reiner then does lean down again, but instead of aiming for his lips, he angles his head to kiss at his neck. Bertholdt makes a slight noise when Reiner bites and then sucks a hickey into the skin.

The hand caressing his belly moves down over the trail of course hair leading from his naval, before groping him through his pyjama pants. Bertholdt jerks under Reiner, and fidgets when the lips on his neck mouth at his jawline. His eyelids flutter a little, unsure and slightly uncomfortable, before he decides to close his eyes. He lets Reiner touch him, biting his lip, but he starts to feel dubious when Reiner slips his hand down into his underwear.

Bertholdt presses his hands gently into Reiner's chest, trying to give him the hint, but Reiner doesn't stop. Bertholdt sighs, and pushes as he says, “Reiner, wait.” Then Reiner does stop touching him, and leans back to look down at him with a flushed face and hazy eyes. 

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks with concern in his voice, brow furrowing. Bertholdt shakes his head. 

“I want to take a shower before we...,” Bertholdt murmurs, and trails off his words, averting his eyes from Reiner's. Reiner removes his hand from him and nods silently. Bertholdt feels kind of silly for wanting to shower before going further, but he would rather be at his most comfortable. He didn't want to be gross when they supposedly were going to do something further than brief touches or kisses. Reiner should understand. Bertholdt slips out from under him when the blonde sits back.

“I'll be quick,” he promises, pausing mid-step, debating if he should give him a small kiss or not. Its not needed. Instead, he spares a light smile when Reiner looks at him and nods, before he paces into the bathroom to grab his usual things for showering.

 

He does try to be quick. There were a few boys in the changing room, and like usual, he's anxious when it comes to undressing among them, but he forces himself to just get it over with. Then he hurries to claim a stall, and once he gets the warm water running, he only takes a few minutes to wash his hair and scrub down his tan skin. 

Then he grabs a towel, dries off (although his hair was still damp, even after ruffling the towel over the locks repeatedly), gets dressed in the pyjamas he came there with, and leaves the changing room with a nervousness building in his stomach. His heart begins to beat a little quicker when he returns to the room. 

Once he pushes into the dimly lit room, he finds that Reiner is sitting on the side of his bed, a hand raised to rub at his face. Bertholdt silently paces in, and shuts the door behind him. He leans against it for a moment, and meets Reiner's gaze. Reiner's lips curl into a smile as his eyes sweep down Bertholdt. Bertholdt wets his dry lips as he locks the door behind himself.

“C'mere,” Reiner says, hushed. Bertholdt feels a blush build in his cheeks as he takes tentative, quiet steps to him. But then Reiner holds up a hand, and Bertholdt pauses in front of him, brow furrowing. He notices that Reiner is looking over him again, a smile growing on his lips.

“You look good in my hoodie, actually,” Reiner muses, and then reaches out to grab him around the wrist. Bertholdt lets himself be pulled into his lap. Bertholdt remains quiet, and adjusts himself on his lap, bringing his hands up to set them on Reiner's shoulders. He does feel his face warm though, a small shy smile on his lips. He watches as Reiner leans in to kiss it.

Bertholdt melts into it, lips moving along with Reiner's, eyes falling close. Yet, he hadn't brushed his teeth yet. Whatever. Reiner doesn't seem to mind, anyways. Bertholdt can be self-conscious, is all.

When Reiner guides him down to lay on his back, Bertholdt latches his arms around his neck and lets him. With his legs draped sideways across Reiner's thighs, his torso was swiveled a little, but it wasn't a bother. Reiner's bare arms were propping himself up, forearms hugging the sides of Bertholdt's head. Bertholdt doesn't really know what to do with his hands, but he doesn't want to leave them by his sides. So instead he brings them up to hook his fingers over Reiner's forearms beside his head, lips continuing to move with Reiner's.

He feels Reiner's hands slide into his damp hair, fingers smoothing through his dark locks. Bertholdt feels enveloped and suffocated with Reiner, which wasn't entirely a bad thing. He could smell Reiner's natural scent, taste him on his tongue, and feel his warm skin against him. Bertholdt's heart was racing and he had to break away to catch his breath, panting a little breathlessly. He opens his eyes to look up at him through the dim light. Reiner's eyes were fixed down on his own, searching for something, and Bertholdt feels his heart clench with adoration.

He lifts a hand to touch his fingertips to Reiner's flushed cheek, eyes watching as he moves them up the side of his face, gentle and loving. He moves them into his short hair. The sleeve to Reiner's hoodie slips down his arm a little bit. Reiner smiles, almost a grin, and then raises one of his hands to grab Bertholdt's. Bertholdt watches with quiet pants as Reiner kisses each fingertip. It makes Bertholdt give a small smile too. 

Then he draws Bertholdt's hand back and lets his bright golden eyes drift down the inside of his forearm. Bertholdt feels a simple happiness, until he notices that Reiner's jaw locks and his brow furrows. Bertholdt's stomach tightens at the realization, and he yanks his arm away like he was burned. Reiner's confused and slightly angered eyes averts to him, and it makes Bertholdt shrink back into the bed.

“Bertholdt, what are those scars?”

Bertholdt looks away and clenches his eyes shut. He hates that question. Hates it so much. His face flushes in fear, cheeks growing uncomfortably hot. Reiner grabs his arm again, and pulls it back out to eye those marks. Bertholdt grits his teeth, opening his eyes, and tries to pull it away, but Reiner is stubborn.

“Is this why you always wear a sweater or a jacket? I thought it was weird when you wore a sweater when it was warm out. I guess this is why. How could I have not noticed until now?” Reiner hisses, letting his arm go. He sounds as if it was a betrayal. As if it even concerned him. Bertholdt tries to wiggle out from under him but Reiner doesn't move, instead staring down at him expectantly.

“Bertholdt, answer me. What are those scars?”

“What do you think!?” Bertholdt snarls, glaring up at him as he pushes at his chest. Reiner's stern expression then softens a little, but Bertholdt doesn't care. He's angry now. Angry that Reiner disrespected him like that. Bertholdt decides this is enough and pushes him off, slipping out and scooting back to the end of the bed. He doesn't leave though. He just brings his knees up and wraps his arms around his shins, putting up a wall like usual. Reiner begins to move towards him, but stops. 

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you,” Reiner says gently, guilt flooding him. Bertholdt doesn't say anything, eyes downcast. A moment passes before he glances up at him and speaks, “Can you just..not. Can we not do this? Please?” He looks a little desperate, brow furrowed and eyes sad. Reiner watches him, hesitating for a long moment, too long, worrying at his lip, and nods slightly. Bertholdt's shoulders relax.

They don't speak for a minute or two, remaining quiet in the dark room, until Bertholdt sighs and drops his arms from around himself. He reaches out and gently grabs Reiner around the wrist. Reiner understands instantly and slips closer, arms spreading in invitation. As if the space was fit just for him, Bertholdt moves into his lap, tucking himself into his open arms. Reiner closes his bare, warm arms around him and rests his chin over Bertholdt's head, feeling the damp locks tickle his skin. Bertholdt exhales heavily, and closes his eyes. 

“Its not like I do it anymore,” Bertholdt mumbles, deciding that's all he'll provide for now. Reiner is quiet.

At least, not with a razor, Bertholdt miserably thinks, the self-loathing steadily building again. Great. This was definitely not how he wanted this to turn out. Bertholdt hears Reiner's heart beat. Its strong and soothing. It manages to distract Bertholdt from his thoughts. He counts the beats, and when he reaches a hundred, he sits back slowly, and looks at Reiner. Reiner's eyes are gentle on his, and when Bertholdt leans in to softly kiss him, Reiner returns it.

The quiet sounds of their lips moving breaks the tense silence. Bertholdt leans away though after a minute, and looks into Reiner's eyes. Then he glances over at the clock on Reiner's side table. It was five after ten. Bertholdt sighs and then spares Reiner a glance before he slips out from his arms and gets up from the bed.

“Bertl,” Reiner begins, but Bertholdt doesn't acknowledge it. He was tired of Reiner always wanting to escalate it. Bertholdt wasn't in the mood anymore, and he knew if he went back to him, he would try to make it go further than a kiss. 

Bertholdt is quick to change into a pair of jeans and a long-sleeved shirt. After pulling on his shoes, he grabs his phone and keys from his desk before looking back at the blond, who had been quiet while Bertholdt got dressed. “I'll be back eventually,” he promises, sees only an expressionless face on Reiner, a face he didn't want to see, before he unlocks the door and steps out.

The air and brightness in the hallway is refreshing. The uncomfortable tense atmosphere in the dorm room was suffocating. He pulls out his phone, leaning against the door. He types out a text with quick presses of his thumbs.

“ _You awake? Can I come over?_ ”

He gets a reply surprisingly quickly.

“ _Sure, Bertholdt! Anything wrong?_ ”

“ _No._ ", Bertholdt casually hides the truth, " _If I would be interrupting anything, I don't have to come over._ ”

Bertholdt begins down the hallway, in the other direction of the staircase. He feels his phone vibrate in his hand. He glances down at it in his palm and opens the text with a swipe of his thumb.

“ _Jean is out, so you're good!_ ”

A feeling of relief floods through Bertholdt. His strides are quicker. He wouldn't be as comfortable if Jean was there as well. When he makes it to the door, he barely knocks softly before the lock on the other side is noisily turned.

The door is drawn open to reveal a half-dressed Marco, with only a pair of sweatpants on. Bertholdt flicks his gaze over his freckled torso and his scarred shoulder (holy shit, can someone even have that many freckles?), before jerking his eyes back to Marco's.

“Bertholdt, hey, come on in,” Marco greets with a bright smile, dimples showing up as he steps to the side and motions in with his hand. Bertholdt dips his head down politely and walks in. He definitely could use a distraction right now. And if knew anyone that would be willing to distract him, and successfully, it was Marco.

“So, any reason to come or do you just want to chat?” Marco cheerfully asks as he closes the door behind himself. Bertholdt bites his lip, watching as Marco takes a squeaky seat on his bed, bright eyes raised to the tall boy.

“I just..want to talk.”

 

In the end, Bertholdt ended up spilling all of it to Marco, about Reiner (which he wasn't too surprised about) and about his stress and even about what just happened. He knew if anyone were to be understanding and considerate of Bertholdt's past self-harming, it was Marco. All Marco did when he showed him the scars was make a soft, crestfallen expression that made Bertholdt's heart clench painfully, but nothing more. He listened and said what needed to be said, and after it all, Bertholdt felt so much better about it.

When he told Marco that he felt confused and unsure about “being” with Reiner, Marco suggested mentioning it to Reiner. That reminded Bertholdt that he _had_ intended to bring it up, but merely forgot to. So, after thanking his friend and awkwardly returning the hug that was given, he said good-bye and hurried back to the dorm room.

Only, he found it empty. Had he really spent that long at Marco's dorm? A crashing feeling of disappointment and exasperation overcame him, and he took a heavy seat on his bed.

Now what was he going to do? He only felt unsatisfied, and incomplete. He needed a stronger peace of mind. Yet Reiner was gone. Again. Like usual. 

Bertholdt ended up bursting into tears like the big sensitive idiot he thought he was. He cried until the distress was gone and he could have the strength and motivation to call Annie and ask if he could come over, sniffing all the while. He didn't even care if Annie could tell he was previously crying his eyes out like a baby. He needed comfort (even after talking to Marco. He was truly pathetic), and if Reiner wasn't there to provide it, he could find someone else that cared more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** I was listening to this song while writing the end of this chapter, and I was like hey, this kinda matches. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZnUYsqw8BA


	28. Chapter 28

“What happened there?”

Glancing over to Connie on the wide couch in the lounge room, Bertholdt's eyebrows raise slightly in question. All eyes avert over to him. It had been previously silent, seeing as a movie was playing and there were other students working at the tables in the back. Even Jean was glancing at him past Marco's shoulder.

Reiner stiffened by his side when he realized Connie was gesturing to Bertholdt's neck. Bertholdt reaches up to absentmindedly touch the bandaid he put there. He breaks into a nervous sweat under all the curious gazes.

“Um. There was..”, Bertholdt hesitates, flicking his eyes over to Reiner's face, seeing his eyes downcast to the floor. “A, uh, pimple,” he mumbles, blushing a little bit. There was a pause before Connie snorts.

“Oh,” he says as he sinks back into the couch cushion. Bertholdt glances over at Jean and Marco. Marco was smiling a little and Jean's expression was of amusement. Sighing, Bertholdt deflates back into the couch and tries to hide his face behind his shoulder. Reiner's arm that was perched behind him on the back of the couch moves away, and Reiner scoots a little bit farther from Bertholdt, a motion almost unnoticeable. Bertholdt's stomach does a kind of uncomfortable, tight twisting feeling and he frowns deeper.

He doesn't see the harm of telling at least their friends about their..thing. Their relationship. Whatever it was. 

And Bertholdt still did intend on asking Reiner about their relationship, but he couldn't get a hold of him until he ran into him at the lounge room when he was searching for him. Reiner was playing table tennis with Connie when Bertholdt had walked in, and as soon as the blond saw him, the grin on his face softened and it all but disappeared. That was rather surprising and unpleasant for Bertholdt, to realize his presence dropped a smile from Reiner's lips, but it probably had to do with what happened the previous night. Bertholdt pulled down on the sleeves to his sweater as he approached the pair.

But before Bertholdt could ask to talk to him privately, Reiner suggested that they watch a movie and everyone mutually agreed, so Bertholdt had no choice but to wait for Reiner, because he definitely was ignoring any texts. 

So Bertholdt and Reiner had remained tense, side by side. Of course they had sat beside each other, because it would make it more suspicious if they _hadn't_. Bertholdt was more than a little uncomfortable, but Reiner seemed to care less than the other. 

Half-way through the movie, Jean and Marco had left, claiming they had work to do (but everyone knew that wasn't the case), and then Connie said he was bored and left in search of Sasha. Eren was just texting away on his phone, sprawled out on the cushions of one of the couches. So without anyone but the other students working in the back, Bertholdt thought this would be the opportunity to ask for a private talk. Eren was distracted with his phone anyways.

“Reiner,” Bertholdt mutters under his breath, reaching out to tug gently on the sleeve to Reiner's hoodie. When Reiner hesitatingly raises his gaze to him, eyes bright and searching, Bertholdt's voice catches in his throat and he panics. He closes his mouth and bites on his inner cheek, eyes fixed down onto Reiner's golden irises, until his anxiety gets the best of him and he sputters, “I-I'm..I'm sorry about...yesterday.” 

He drops his hand from Reiner's sleeve and drops his gaze. Damn it. Why did he have to be so weak? Reiner merely says with a cheerful tone, “Hey, no problem.” Glancing back at him, Bertholdt knows he's only saying that because Eren is here. He would probably ask more questions if Eren wouldn't be in hearing range. Bertholdt swallows down the rock in his throat and sighs. He'll have to wait until they're in total privacy to ask. It might have to be later tonight in the dorm room. 

Thankfully, Reiner doesn't stay around for the ending of the movie. He says a quick goodbye to Eren, who gives a lackluster goodbye in reply, and then grabs Bertholdt around the wrist. He pulls him out of the room, and Bertholdt is more than glad to follow. As soon as they break out into the hallway, Reiner stops and lets his wrist go. Bertholdt watches him warily and pulls down on the cuffs to his sweater with shaky fingers.

“Listen,” Reiner begins, turning to him with a stubborn expression on. Bertholdt tenses up.

“Don't let it be so obvious next time. I mean. A bandaid? On your neck? And when was the last time you even had a zit? You're completely spotless. At least say you hit your neck in your sleep or something. That's more believable because of your crazy ass positions,” Reiner goes on for a bit, giving some exasperated hand gestures that makes Bertholdt fidget and feel discomfort build in his stomach. His face flushes with blood out of embarrassment and with just a general unpleasant feeling. 

“Sorry,” he mutters, dropping his eyes to the floor and hunching his shoulders to close in on himself. He hears a heavy exhale, and then a hand strokes over his shoulder gently, but briefly. Reiner drops his arm against his side with a quiet smack as he says softly, “And I should be more careful too. Next time, I'll try to do it in a place that is easily concealed..”

Bertholdt looks up at him past his bangs. That sparks his question again.

“Reiner,” he begins, lifting his head a little bit, earning those honey eyes, “I..also wanted to ask something..” Reiner cocks a brow, and Bertholdt opens his mouth to begin, but two loud people turn the corner and approach them as they laugh and talk about something with obvious excitement. Bertholdt closes his mouth. He is a little taken by surprise when Reiner grabs his forearm rather roughly and tugs him down the hall towards their room. 

Bertholdt watches silently with a furrowed brow as Reiner shoves into their dorm room, the door previously left unlocked much to Bertholdt's dismay, and pulls Bertholdt inside.

“Ow, Reiner, let me go,” Bertholdt complains when Reiner's grip tightens. Then the blond does relent, and releases his arm. Bertholdt rubs at it tenderly.

The only light is coming through the window above Reiner's desk, and filters into the room, giving a dim light. Bertholdt can see Reiner's shape through the darkness. Reiner then shuts and locks the door, before he flicks on the light. Bertholdt blinks, mouth curling into a grimace at the blaring light, and then he settles his gaze on Reiner, who was standing in front of him with his arms crossed.

“Sorry. What was it you wanted to ask?”

Sighing, Bertholdt feels a little more at ease in here. Reiner would pay attention to him, finally. Bertholdt licks his lips and stares down into Reiner's stern eyes. He urges himself to ask.

“L-look..I've been feeling kinda..”, Bertholdt begins, eyes shifting to and from Reiner's, his palms growing perspired with nervousness. He sighs and then keeps his gaze locked on Reiner's, who was only watching him with patience.

“Unsure. About this. I mean..,” Bertholdt says softly, hesitating, before continuing, “I'm not sure what you want from this. Or from..me. What exactly are we doing?” He blushes and notices how Reiner's brow furrows slightly and he searches into his eyes, as if this was just a joke or something like that. Reiner purses his lips.

“I thought we already established this,” Reiner says, rubbing at the back of his neck as he glances from Bertholdt's gaze. Bertholdt frowns.

“Well. We did say that..we felt..something for each other. I guess. But I don't know what that something is for you.”

Reiner pauses, and drops his hand from his neck. After a moment of staring up into Bertholdt's eyes, Reiner smiles softly and reaches out to take his hand. Bertholdt's blush darkens and he swallows thickly. Reiner says gently, face flushing as well, “I like you, Bertholdt. I told you I have..an attraction. For you. Like. I want you. And stuff. Y'know?” He doesn't sound that confident, a little flustered, but Bertholdt only finds it endearing. He smiles lightly and nods.

“Okay. I'm glad.”

Reiner nods with a grin and leans in to kiss him softly on the lips, hand raised to hook over the back of his neck, and it took Bertholdt off-guard. He didn't expect a kiss. He does return it meekly though, closing his eyes and pressing his lips back against Reiner's. Lifting his hands from fidgeting with the hem of his sweater, Bertholdt clutches onto the sides of Reiner's hoodie. 

They kiss chastely for a minute, until Bertholdt leans away and looks down at him. Reiner gives him a light grin. Bertholdt licks his lips and swallows thickly before he asks quietly, “Are we..are we boyfriends, then?” 

Reiner's grin softens, and his eyes look between Bertholdt's again. He slides his hand down from Bertholdt's neck and gives a light shrug, mouth in a frown. Bertholdt furrows his brow and confusion blooms.

“I...not really. I mean, I like you, but I just want to see how this happens. I'm not entirely confident with having my first..boyfriend. Yet.” Reiner says this a little regretfully, eyes dropping from Bertholdt's. Okay, that wasn't what Bertholdt expected. He thought that this was mutual. Why wouldn't he want to be with Bertholdt yet? They liked each other right? They both want each other and they trust each other. But Bertholdt may as well go with it. He has to give Reiner space anyways. He doesn't want to be pushy.

He silently nods with a frown and drops his hands from Reiner's hoodie. He was kind of suspecting that was the case. Reiner always did reject his affection when they were outside of the dorm room anyways. Bertholdt kind of feels rather sad now. He doesn't want to think that Reiner made him feel sad, so he blames himself. He shouldn't be so sensitive. Why did he let little things get to him like that? Its not a big deal. He was just being dramatic and stupid like usual. He just had to be patient with Reiner.

“I have homework to do,” he says as he steps past the blond and approaches his bed to grab his bag off of it. He hears Reiner turn to him. Reiner says, “Bertholdt, I'm not saying that I'm not into you, because I am. I just..I can't see myself being your boyfriend yet.”

“I know,” Bertholdt remarks as he glances back at him, hooking his bag onto his shoulder. Reiner appeared slightly exasperated and worried, hands turned outwards towards him, but not raised, as if he was hesitating to reach out to him. Then Bertholdt looks away and grabs his coat, before he approaches and unlocks the door.

“Bertl, wait,” he hears Reiner say. Bertholdt shuts the door behind himself and begins towards the staircase. He just needs to be by himself and think about it a little. Why does it have to be so complicated? He wishes in the farthest corner of his mind that Reiner would come after him. 

It doesn't happen.

 

Two hours later, after working in the library for one of them and wandering around campus for the next, Bertholdt returns to the dorm room with no more confidence or certainty. Bertholdt thinks that he shouldn't be so worked up over it as he trudges back up the staircase of the dormitory building. At least he even managed to ask in the first place. But that answer only awakened more frustrating questions.

When he does return to their dorm, he finds the door locked. Good. Finally Reiner remembered to lock it. Bertholdt sighs as he unlocks it and pushes in. The light was off. He turns it on, hears a muffled grumble, and then turns it off again. So Reiner was going to bed earlier than usual. Bertholdt glances at the clock. Almost half past eleven. Maybe not so earlier. Bertholdt drops his bag onto the floor by his bed. 

Bertholdt is quick to change into his pyjamas in the dim light of the moonlight filtering in past the closed cheap drapes of the window. He discards all of his clothing onto his chair at his desk, deciding he was lazy and too tired tonight to deal with it just yet. Bertholdt paces past Reiner's bed to enter the bathroom. In the small space, he quickly brushes his teeth and washes his face.

When he had raised his hands to wipe at the wetness on his face, the sleeves to his sweater slipped down. The prominent scars lining down his tan forearms grasped his gaze. Bertholdt stares down at them silently, mouth turning down into a frown. They were just a simple reminder of his mistakes and it makes him grimace. He grabs the hand towel and dries off his face before leaving the miniature bathroom with a new discomfort. 

He doesn't approach his bed. Instead he paces up to where Reiner lay messily atop his own bed, and nudges him with a hand. Reiner groans, but does roll over. Bertholdt knew he had to have been awake due to his grumble earlier. Reiner's body hits against the wall with a muted thud and he gives a muffled, “Ow.” Bertholdt grabs some of the covers and situates himself below them. It was warm where Reiner previously lay. 

After a moment, Reiner shuffles around and then warm arms curl around Bertholdt's midsection. Bertholdt's tense shoulders relax and he lets out a breath. Reiner nuzzles into his neck. Bertholdt rests his hand over Reiner's forearm atop his belly. 

Bertholdt continues to stare out up at the ceiling for a few minutes in silence. He listens to Reiner's deep breathing. Then the arm around him shifts and retracts. Bertholdt remains quiet as a hand closes around his wrist and draws his arm over to the other.

“What are you..,” Bertholdt begins to question but grows silent when Reiner pulls back his sleeve. His cheeks flush with mild discomfort. He pulls back the covers with a tug to reveal Reiner's messy hair and his sleepy eyes. But Reiner hardened them when he glances up at Bertholdt. Bertholdt's stomach clenches nervously when Reiner averts his gaze to the same stupid scars that Bertholdt only looked at five minutes ago. 

He expects a look of disappointment or more questions or something, but instead Reiner brings his arm up and kisses each mark with soft touches of his lips. Bertholdt tenses up and looks away. He shivers when Reiner moves down the skin with gentle caresses of his mouth. Then it stops, so Bertholdt returns his gaze to him. He watches silently as Reiner kisses his palm. And then Reiner looked up at him. He searches in Bertholdt's olive green eyes before opening his mouth to speak.

“I want you to know that these don't bother me. And you don't have to explain anything. I was out of line demanding answers like that. And I'm sorry.”

Bertholdt swallows thickly, eyes fixed on Reiner's, and gently pulls his arm away. Reiner drops his hand down onto Bertholdt's belly and waits for an answer. Bertholdt isn't sure what to say at first. He furrows his brow.

“Why..are you saying this? You already apologized.”

“I didn't want you to think that I would be bothered by it, is all. It was in your past anyways.”

After a tense pause, Bertholdt nods and drops his gaze. He pulls the sleeve to his sweater back down to his wrist as he murmurs, “Can we just go to bed now?” Reiner nods and then drops back down onto the pillow, previously propped up on an elbow, before shifting closer to Bertholdt. He situates back into the same position, with his arm across the taller boy's midsection, nuzzling close to him.

“You're like a personal heater...”, Reiner murmurs, breath brushing against the skin of his neck. Bertholdt remains quiet, glancing over at him briefly, looking at his closed eyes and full lips, before he closes his own eyes as well. 

“Try not to kill me in my sleep. I don't want to die from a foot to the face,” he hears Reiner say softly in the dark. Then its silent, and within ten minutes, Reiner begins to softly snore beside him. Bertholdt stays awake for the next half-hour, thoughts whirring away and keeping him up, until he grows too tired to stay up and he finally slips into a pleasant slumber. 

\----------

The next day, Bertholdt felt more confident with the relationship. Learning that Reiner didn't want anything definite at the moment made him realize that he needn't stress over it. Reiner definitely wasn't. Bertholdt just had to be patient. He had to let Reiner grow more comfortable with it all. He didn't consider that jumping into a romantic relationship with another boy for the first time could be hard to ease into. Reiner obviously had been straight until meeting him. Its not like sexuality or attraction was a specific thing. It could be flexible. 

Even if Reiner didn't like touching or anything like that outside of the dorm room (unless it was concealed), Bertholdt could learn to deal with it. He did hide his relationships in high school, so it shouldn't be any different. Except he wished it was different. He didn't want to hide anything anymore. Whatever. As long as Reiner was happy with it, he didn't mind. At least he had Reiner in the end.

\----------

Why was it so hard to unlock the damn door? Bertholdt's fingers felt like Jell-O. They just weren't cooperating. He dropped the keys. Both he and Reiner broke into giggles at that. Bertholdt was trying to quell his grin as he reached down to grab them. He stumbled on the untied laces to his shoes and almost fell back into Reiner. Reiner grabbed onto his sides and Bertholdt used the leverage to right himself.

“Jeeesus, you are drunk off your balls.”

Bertholdt laughs much like a drunken seal before he retorts, “I'm not Jesus, dumbass.” Reiner smacks him on the back of the head as he finally slots the key into the lock. Bertholdt shoves into the room after unlocking it with much difficulty. The push results in him falling onto the floor with a heavy thud, and Reiner snorts loudly. Bertholdt rolls to the side as Reiner grabs at his arms. 

“Hey, get up you goof,” Reiner says as he tugs at his arms. Bertholdt whines and then gives a hyena laugh as he yanks Reiner down onto him by the arms. It wasn't that hard. Reiner was drunk too. Reiner falls on top of him with a muffled grunt and his legs get tangled with Bertholdt's.

Reiner's hand press down onto his chest to lift himself and Bertholdt wheezes.

“You're fat,” he groans, and tries pushing him off. 

“Idiot, its muscle.”

“Yeeeaah right. All you ever do is sit on your butt all day.”

Reiner looks down at him, hands set on the hard wood floor on either side of Bertholdt's head, propping himself up. He makes this kind-of puckered grimace that made him look like he was constipated. Bertholdt giggles under him, eyes squinting and mouth twitching with his grin. Reiner leans down to messily kiss his lips. Bertholdt makes a noise and his hands shoot up, smacking Reiner in the stomach unintentionally. 

“Damn it, ow,” Reiner grumbles, pulling back to glare down at the flushed Bertholdt. Bertholdt pats him on the stomach with apologetic hands. He juts his bottom lip out and says, “Sorry.” Then he grins, revealing his teeth, and grabs fistfuls of Reiner's hoodie at his chest and pulls him back down. Reiner makes a startled noise, taken off-guard, before he rights himself and presses his lips back to Bertholdt's.

Bertholdt hums into the kiss and tries to return it. Its kind of just their lips sloppily mashing together. It wasn't really sexy or anything, and it only made Bertholdt want to laugh again. He begins to giggle against Reiner's lips, until he can't hold it back. He brings his hands up to push at Reiner's face to get him off. He then laughs when Reiner complies and leans away. 

“Why are you laughin'?” Reiner demands, looking down at him with a flushed face and a furrowed brow, eyes dilated. Bertholdt's upper body jumps with his laughter, eyes clenched shut and tearing up. Reiner's hand lifts to delicately play with a lock of Bertholdt's hair. Bertholdt swats at that hand and continues to laugh, but the laughter grows softer until he stops and only sniffs a few times.

“Your breath stinks,” Bertholdt murmurs, gazing up at Reiner. Reiner plays with his hair, sliding his fingers into the black locks, honey eyes searching in Bertholdt's. Reiner gives a grin, teeth revealed. 

“And you smell like sweat,” Reiner says, “But I like that.” 

Bertholdt makes a face. Reiner laughs.

“I can't reach your lips from down here,” Bertholdt softly says, eyes drifting down to said lips, and it makes Reiner snort. Reiner nods sarcastically, trying to think of a snotty reply. Nothing comes to mind, so instead he leans down and kisses him more gently. Bertholdt's sweaty hands grasp at his shoulders as their mouths move. 

It goes on for a while until a voice breaks their little make out session.

“Are you guys back? How was the party?” A voice asks as it grows louder, the person approaching their open door. Reiner's hands in Bertholdt's hair move down to prop himself up on the hardwood floor. Bertholdt pushes at Reiner's shoulders. 

“Why is your door--”

When the voice is more apparent, Reiner jerks away from Bertholdt, and glances back. Bertholdt looks past Reiner's arm to see Marco standing there at the doorway, eyebrows raised, his dark hair messy atop his head. 

“I--shit. Sorry,” Marco begins, blushing, and then he laughs a little, turning away as he grabs the doorknob. “Its lucky it was me who caught you. Close the door next time, okay guys?” he says sheepishly before clicking the door shut after himself. Bertholdt lifts his gaze to Reiner, heart thudding heavily in his chest, and licks his lips.

“...Well he took that easily,” Reiner muses as he drops his eyes to Bertholdt's. Bertholdt smiles, before he giggles and nods.

“Has he known this entire time?” Reiner asks with a furrowed brow, his lips dropping into a frown. Bertholdt nods again with his grin softening, hands sliding down Reiner's arms. Reiner purses his lips thoughtfully, and then sighs.

“And how does he know?”

“Because I told him about it. But I think he knew before even we did.”

Reiner looks a little upset about Bertholdt telling Marco, but then he makes a confused expression.

Bertholdt laughs lightly, and thinks back on it as he says, “He sent me these real questionable texts like, “Someone likes you”. Or something like that. Or like. Asking me real weird questions like “So how's it going between you and Reiner?” Shit like that. Like, he was laying it on real thick and stuff.” Reiner's face becomes unreadable by that point. 

A moment later, Reiner sits back on Bertholdt's legs and crosses his arms. Bertholdt props up on his elbows, which kinda hurt because the floor was hard. He watches Reiner warily.

“Well, Marco has always been kinda per..perceptive? Smart. He's been kinda smart. So I guess that's expected. Huh..” Reiner says this as he rubs at his chin, brow furrowed with thought. Bertholdt nods quickly before he says with a stressed voice, “You're hurting my legs, get off.” Reiner was really heavy. Reiner processes this and sputters a quick apology as he gets up onto his unsteady feet. 

Bertholdt bends his knees a few times, wringing out the pain and then he reaches his hands out, shaking his wrists, asking for a hand. Reiner reaches out and grasps his hands. He tugs and pulls Bertholdt up, but not without stumbling back onto Bertholdt's bed. He falls onto it with a 'oof' and grows lax on it, sinking into the plush comforter. 

“Dumby,” Bertholdt slurs, a laugh following, and climbs onto the bed beside him, with his shoes and coat still on, his scarf barely hanging off his shoulders. Reiner grabs him around the waist and pulls him down. Bertholdt cries out with a laugh and pushes against him with weak hands, feet pressing into Reiner's shins. 

Reiner makes 'raaaawr' noises as he pinches at Bertholdt's sides. Bertholdt bucks with a shrill laugh and shoves his hands against him, scrambling to get away. Apparently Reiner decided to start tickling him. Reiner gets on top of him and continues to tease him with a grin, watching as Bertholdt wiggles around under him. 

“Stoppit!” Bertholdt shouts and presses a hand against Reiner's neck. Reiner relents with laughter and instead gently grabs his hand from his neck and kisses the palm. Bertholdt pauses, panting, and looks up at him with a flushed face. 

Reiner smiles down at him. Then he lets his hand go and falls onto his side beside Bertholdt on the bed with a bounce. Bertholdt tries to catch his breath as he smacks Reiner on the hip. Reiner laughs again and scoots closer to the other. 

“Don't do that ever ever ever again,” Bertholdt demands, smacking him on the shoulder this time. Reiner nods continuously as he hooks his arms around Bertholdt's midsection. Although, after a moment, he retracts a hand to tug off Bertholdt's snowflake scarf. He tosses it onto the floor and then pulls at the zipper to Bertholdt's coat.

“Hey, don't just throw that on the ground, that was from you, y'know,” Bertholdt complains, beginning to sit up so he can look over the edge of the small bed to see the poor discarded thing. But Reiner tugs him back down and unzips his coat.

“Its alright,” Reiner shushes him and pulls his coat off his compliant arms. Bertholdt frowns weakly and wonders how the scarf is doing down on the cold floor as Reiner throws his coat off as well. Then Reiner pulls him close again and nuzzles into him. 

Bertholdt hums and turns over to face Reiner, bringing his legs up to tuck them in close, situating himself closer to the other. He brings a hand up to card his fingers into Reiner's short blond hair. Reiner kisses him on the collarbone and it makes Bertholdt smile. Reiner sighs against his skin and then whispers softly, “You mean a lot to me as well, you silly drunk tree.”

“Why am I tree? I thought I was Jesus.”

“Because you're tall. Now be quiet and let me hold you.”

“Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Yes! Jeez. Shut up.”

“Okay.”


	29. Chapter 29

Bertholdt was so done with the damn stairs. Aren't college dormitories _supposed_ to have elevators? He lived in the goddamned United States, and if one of it's colleges didn't have elevators in the dormitories, then there definitely was something wrong with the economy. 

Of course, Bertholdt was just mentally bitching as he trudged up the never ending steps, hoisting his sports bag over his shoulder, basically his entire body aching in protest. He was already breaking a sweat, and it was even more unpleasant because Bertholdt had _already_ been dirty and sweaty. Sighing, he readjusts the bag and reminds himself there was only one more floor to ascend.

He hears another set of footsteps quickly going down the stairs above him. He keeps his eyes to the steps when that person passes. 

“Hey, Bertholdt!” 

They called his name. Who the--? Bertholdt glances over his shoulder. It was Eren. 

Bertholdt furrows his brow. Why would Eren bother addressing him? The only times they've talked was when Eren asked for some advice regarding his girlfriend (even though Bertholdt wasn't the greatest person to ask when it came to girls), or when he asked for the time. He assumed Eren would have just passed him.

Eren was looking at him with his bright stern eyes, mouth in a tight line. He pauses, before speaking.

“You know where Reiner is?”

Bertholdt frowns. Of course he just wanted something from him. He shrugs.

“I've been out the past two hours so I wouldn't know. Have you tried his cell?”

Eren lifted his hand and waved it, showing his phone in his grasp. He nods with a light smirk on his lips. Bertholdt blinks, and then asks, “Is that all you wanted?”

Dropping his hand, Eren hesitates, and raises his free hand to rub at his neck, much like Reiner typically does. He shrugs, so Bertholdt turns and continues up the staircase “Hey, wait,” Eren calls a moment later, so Bertholdt does wait, and looks back at him.

“I just...I wanted to say,” Eren begins, stern eyes softening. He scuffs his shoe on the concrete of the step below him as he speaks, eyes downcast, “That I didn't really say much to you through this year, of course. But I don't want you to think that I'm like, ignoring you or something. I think its cool how you're close with Reiner. 'Cause it definitely keeps that jerk off my ass.”

Bertholdt pauses, staring down at him with a curiosity and slight confusion, before he slowly nods, unsure of what to say. This was weird. Out of all of the places and times..

“O-okay. Well. Likewise, I suppose. Thanks.” Bertholdt blushes, embarrassed by his own awkwardness. What was he even supposed to say to that? Eren lifts his gaze to Bertholdt and smiles lightly. He drops his hand from his neck and nods. 

“Catch you later then,” Eren says with a smile. Bertholdt nods. He watches as Eren waves and then turns to hurry back down the staircase. Bertholdt stares after him, still processing what happened, before he sighs and begins back up the steps. Well, whatever that was, Bertholdt appreciated it. Kind of. It was mostly out of the blue. He just wants to take a damn shower, really.

\---------

“Hey, stop picking at the pepperonis!”, Bertholdt complains as he smacks at Reiner's hand. The blond retracts his hand with a mild glare, but lets it be. He just liked the pepperonis, okay. 

Sitting side by side on Reiner's bed, they had a medium-sized pizza box resting on Bertholdt's lap. With his legs crossed, Reiner propped his laptop on their knees. They had agreed to take a break from working with a movie. Bertholdt let Reiner choose, because he frankly didn't care. He just was tired of Math and he wanted something else to stare at.

“Really? _Fight Club_ again?” Bertholdt says with exasperation, when the opening scene begins. Reiner nudges Bertholdt with his elbow, saying some muffled words around the pizza in his mouth. Bertholdt rolls his eyes as he takes a small bite of his own piece. 

They watched in silence as they ate at their pizza. Reiner manages to eat more than half, and Bertholdt only has two pieces. Bertholdt expected as much. Reiner moans about a stomach ache near the middle of the movie and Bertholdt tells him its his own damn fault. And of course, twenty minutes before the movie ends, Reiner places his laptop aside and tugs Bertholdt close to kiss him on the mouth.

Bertholdt doesn't really complain. He just wants to brush his teeth first, but Reiner has different intentions. He goes with it though, even if the voices continue from Reiner's laptop and he realizes that he has to pee really bad too. After about a minute of rather tame kissing, Bertholdt can't ignore the persistence in his bladder and pulls away.

“Give me a second,” he says as he stands from the bed, casting Reiner a glance over his shoulder as he steps into the bathroom. Reiner was closing his laptop and setting it aside when Bertholdt shut the door behind himself. 

Bertholdt is quick to brush his teeth after relieving his bladder and washing his hands, his heart beating quickly in his chest with his excitement and equal nervousness. He could hear Reiner moving about past the door. He should probably floss because pizza bits isn't a pleasant thing to find while kissing. But he doesn't bother. Maybe it would be an effective way to stall, though. Bertholdt doesn't have the patience, in the end. After putting his toothbrush away and rinsing his mouth out, he checks his teeth before leaving the bathroom.

He finds Reiner looking down at his open notebook with a curious and confused expression. Bertholdt smiles a little when Reiner grabs it and stares down at the complicated Calculus notes with a furrowed brow and an expression that became progressively more confused. Bertholdt snickers as he approaches and takes it from his grasp.

“How the hell?” Reiner asks, looking up at him. Bertholdt laughs quietly and sets the notebook aside, climbing onto Reiner's lap, straddling his thighs. He brings his hands up and sets them on either side of Reiner's neck, looking into his eyes as he says, “Its complicated.”

“I can tell. It was like another language!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bertholdt brushes it off, rolling his eyes. Reiner's hands rest on his waist, fingers curling tightly. Bertholdt leans in, angling his head slightly so he can kiss Reiner's lips without their noses bumping. Reiner's full lips press back against his own. Bertholdt matches the movements of Reiner's lips, returning the kisses when they become open-mouthed. Their tongues meet half-way, drawing a pleased hum from Reiner. 

Bertholdt curls his fingers into his short blond hair as their lips touch and their tongues embrace, eyes briefly flicking open to look at Reiner's closed eyes. Bertholdt wonders if Reiner can taste the mint in his mouth. That's probably a given. Bertholdt can't really taste anything in Reiner's. The fresh mint overrules any other taste. Bertholdt closes his eyes. 

He knows he took a shower about four hours ago, after coming home from the gymnasium. So. That wasn't a concern. Bertholdt wishes in the back of his mind that he wasn't so paranoid or self-conscious about things like that. Reiner was hardly experienced at all, and it seemed like he didn't care much about it.

Reiner pulls away to catch his breath. Opening his eyes again, Bertholdt licks his lips as Reiner looks at him with a flushed face and dilated eyes.

A smile tugs at the corners of Bertholdt's lips when he reaches down to grope Reiner through the pliable fabrics of his shorts and underwear. He was already hard. That was kind of cute. And flattering. Reiner looked flustered and embarrassed. Bertholdt kisses him on the corner of the mouth as he touches and rubs at him through his shorts. Reiner's moan is caught in his throat, bit back. Bertholdt would rather hear him, but he doesn't bring it up. He begins to softly mouth at Reiner's jaw as he slips his hand past the waistbands, fingers brushing down the course hair there. 

Reiner shifts and slightly bucks under him when he grabs onto his erection. Bertholdt smiles to himself and gives one, two, three pulls before he removes his hand. Reiner sighs, deflating a little under him. Bertholdt sits back. Reiner looks disappointed, but he only watches the other as the taller boy stands from his lap and pulls his sweater up over his head. Then he works on the buttons to his white button-up shirt, looking down at the blond's flushed face as he does so. 

After he undoes all the buttons he pulls it off and drops it to the side.

“What are you doing?” Bertholdt asks as he works on the belt to his pants. “Why am I the only one undressing right now?” Reiner's eyes widen a little, and then he jumps into action. Bertholdt tries quelling his amused grin when Reiner pulls off his shirt with a quick tug, arms lifting momentarily, revealing the hair under them briefly. His finely toned chest and abs are revealed as well. Bertholdt licks his lips, openly appreciating, as he steps out of his jeans. Reiner smirks, noticing his stare, and then tugs his shorts off. 

“How do you even keep that body?” Bertholdt asks as he steps back up to him, clad in only his boxers. Reiner tosses his shorts aside and beckons Bertholdt forward. 

“I'm always out, right? Well sometimes I go to the gym. Like, basically every day,” Reiner explains as Bertholdt takes a seat on his lap again, setting his warm hands on his hips. Bertholdt hums and then leans in to kiss him on the lips again, hands resting around his neck. Reiner closes his eyes and moves his lips back against Bertholdt's. When a hand grasps at Bertholdt's cock through his boxers, the taller boy pauses in the kissing, and then sighs against Reiner's lips. Reiner rubs at the outline of his shaft as they continue with the embrace of lips.

Bertholdt begins to circle his hips down into Reiner's thighs, rubbing against him and eliciting a quiet moan from his throat, head tipping back, breaking the kiss. Reiner watches as he pants, sore, kissed lips slightly open, hands sliding up Bertholdt's tan skin of his sides.

“Lay back,” Bertholdt murmurs, letting his gaze meet Reiner's again, chest slightly heaving with his heavy breathing. He slips off of Reiner's lap, waiting for him to move. Reiner licks his lips and grabs Bertholdt by the wrist. Bertholdt follows as Reiner gets up onto the bed and lays back against his pillow. He straddles Reiner again and smiles down at him. Reiner turns his grasp around on his wrist to run his fingers up Bertholdt's forearm, feeling the dark hairs as he touches. 

Silently, Bertholdt leans over, propping himself up by his forearms as he presses his lips down onto Reiner's. Sounds of their kissing breaks the quiet of the room, and then their breathing mixes in when Bertholdt leans away. He looks down at Reiner's flushed face and dilated eyes as he begins to rock his hips down into him, effectively grinding his erection against Reiner's through the two layers of thin fabric. Reiner's eyes flutter close and he moans. Bertholdt coyly smiles, bringing himself up to his hands for more leverage. He drops his head as he gives deeper rolls of his hips, mouth falling open.

The heat radiating from Reiner and himself keeps them warm in the otherwise cool room. Bertholdt felt sweat slip down the curve of his back. Reiner's hands grasp at his hips then, hips rolling back up into Bertholdt's movements. It coaxes a moan from Bertholdt, his olive green eyes drawn down to Reiner's face.

Reiner was biting his lip, head tilted back slightly, neck exposed and eyes closed. Bertholdt leans over, back curling, and mouths at his flushed neck as he rubs down into him. One of the hands on his hip slides up his lower back and drags his blunt nails down the flesh there. Bertholdt bites on his collarbone in retaliation and sucks a hickey into the taut skin there, deciding he may as well return the favor. Reiner makes a noise in his throat that makes Bertholdt smile.

“Jesus, just touch me already,” Reiner says breathlessly, pushing his hips back up into Bertholdt's, earning a gasp from the other. Bertholdt then laughs quietly, and leans back to look at him, asking with an amused tone, “Are you going to start begging, Reiner?”

“No. I'm demanding.”

“Well that isn't polite of you. Maybe if you use the magic word..”

“Idiot,” Reiner grunts when Bertholdt plays with the head of his cock through his underwear with light fingers. He shifts under Bertholdt and lets out a sigh of exasperation. Bertholdt smiles softly and eases back down to kiss him. Reiner's lips are more needy, mouthing against his hungrily. Bertholdt easily matches it and lets Reiner's tongue slip into his mouth when it touches his lip. Bertholdt feels a hand slide into his locks. He grasps a fistful tightly and it makes Bertholdt gasp. Reiner tugs Bertholdt's head back, earning his olive green eyes.

“Please,” Reiner hisses with his piercing honey eyes fixed on Bertholdt's. Bertholdt grins down at him. His eyes fall close as Reiner's fist tightens in his hair, the pleased, amused grin on his lip extending. Then Reiner lets go and Bertholdt opens his eyes to look down at him, grin softening to a smile.

“Since you were so kind,” Bertholdt muses, scooting back, and reaches down to tug Reiner's briefs down his thighs, revealing the dark hair there and his flushed cock. Pre-come had already built at the slit on the head. Bertholdt flicks his eyes up to Reiner's face, seeing his mouth open and brow furrowed, and then returns his gaze to his erection. Bertholdt reaches over to stroke his fingers delicately over the tuft of hair there above it on Reiner's lower belly. Reiner's thighs shift under him, to open wider, when Bertholdt plays his fingers around.

The pre-come slipping down the shaft was rather enticing. Bertholdt licks his lips and finally runs his fingers up to touch the pink head. Reiner sucks in a quick breath when Bertholdt's thumb rubs against the slit, wiping around the clear substance. Bertholdt watches Reiner's flushed expression as he begins to give slow strokes with the wetness of his pre-come. Reiner was biting his lip with his brow furrowed, his eyes closed. 

Bertholdt feels Reiner begin to fidget under him after about two minutes of touching him in this way, thighs shifting and hips raising slightly off the bed. Bertholdt removes his hand and is given a weak, annoyed gaze. Reiner begins to complain but Bertholdt presses a hand over his mouth. 

“I'm not done yet,” Bertholdt murmurs in a promise, staring down into Reiner's hazy golden eyes. Reiner gives a slight nod, so Bertholdt removes his hand and gets up from straddling him. Reiner sits straighter, watching silently, breathing a little heavy, as Bertholdt approaches his bed across the room. Reiner realizes what he's getting from his nightstand, and as Bertholdt breaks off a condom, Reiner pulls off his underwear entirely and lets it join their clothing on the floor.

Reiner thinks the silence was kind of tense as Bertholdt comes back to him. Instead of joining him on the bed though, Bertholdt opens his own nightstand and digs around inside the drawer to grab what appeared to be a small bottle. 

“Why would you buy condoms but not lubricant? You think I can self-lubricate like girls?” Bertholdt asks as he climbs back onto the bed. “Well,” he says as he hands Reiner the condom, “At least I had some, luckily.” Reiner pauses, realizes he was foolish to think that, and then he laughs a little nervously, feeling kind of stupid. Then he does actually process why they would need lubricant and looks up at Bertholdt.

“You..you want..”

Bertholdt just levels him with an unamused look as he opens the bottle and squeezes out some clear substance that builds in his palm. Reiner swallows and looks back down to the condom in his hand. Well. He hopes he won't be disappointing. He opens the condom wrapper and plucks it out. 

Silently, Bertholdt spreads some of the lube over his fingers and then reaches around himself, propped on his shins, and rubs the excess over his anus. He blushes, knowing Reiner was watching, and hesitates. Glancing over at the blond past his bangs, Bertholdt sees him, indeed, watching him with his mouth slightly ajar in awe. 

Sighing, Bertholdt urges himself to get it over with and slips a finger in. He ducks his head down, and raises his hips a little to give himself more room. Reiner was quiet as Bertholdt moves the finger a little. When he adds a second, he hears Reiner ask, “Does...does it hurt?”

Bertholdt resists the urge to roll his eyes. He expected him to ask that. He glances up at him, face warm, and mutters, “Not really.” It just felt kind of uncomfortable. He is quick to finger himself, rubbing his wet fingers around to coat the lubrication around. The last guy he's been with, the older blond guy from the bar, had a pretty impressive size. probably the largest he's had, so Reiner wouldn't be too much. He didn't need to use a third finger. And he wasn't that excited over preparation beforehand, so his erection was starting to soften a little.

He removes his fingers and then looks up at Reiner.

“Lay back. I'll do the work, since this is your first time with a man,” he sternly says, getting a little impatient. Reiner swallows thickly and nods. He does as he's told, pulling himself entirely onto the bed, and props up on his elbows to watch him. Bertholdt notices Reiner had put the condom on. That makes it easier. Bertholdt grabs the lube bottle he set aside and squeezes out a small amount. He places the bottle back on the nightstand, and reaches out to stroke Reiner a few times to wet it. Reiner shifts his hips. Bertholdt straddles his thighs, and raises up onto his knees. 

Gazing down at his..not-boyfriend, his roommate, Bertholdt angles his cock against his entrance with his wet hand, and eases down onto it. His previous preparation helped with the give. Bertholdt slowly sinks down onto him, until he's sitting on him. Reiner knocks his head back against the bed, and lowers himself down onto his back. He moans.

Bertholdt pants, face flushed and brow furrowed. Reiner was definitely bigger than he expected. He reaches down to stroke himself with his wet hand, and adjusts himself by propping his feet on the bed, knees raised. Biting his lip, he looks over at Reiner when he lifts himself back up. Reiner raises his head to watch Bertholdt. His face was flushed as well, mouth open and chest heaving with his breaths. He licks his dried lips before speaking.

“Fuck, that is totally different--”

“You better not talk about vaginas when I'm riding you, Reiner.”

Reiner laughs breathlessly, and props up on his elbows again. Bertholdt gives a slight swivel of his hips when he sits back down. Reiner's eyes clench shut, breath hitching, hips fidgeting. Bertholdt feels Reiner's cock pass over his prostate with a brush each time he lowers himself. He gives quiet moans each time. He stopped touching himself, knowing his erection wasn't going to wane, and reaches over to set his hands on Reiner's belly. He gives quicker lifts of his hips, using his leverage to the best of his ability.

Moaning rather shamefully, Reiner reaches out to grasp at Bertholdt's thighs, blunt fingernails digging in. Bertholdt wasn't one to close his eyes during sex, an absentminded thing, so he keeps his eyes fixed on Reiner's expression, gazing at his flushed cheeks and bitten lips, his eyes clenched shut and mouth agape. Bertholdt couldn't hold his heavy breathing back anymore. He pants breathlessly as he moves. His thighs shake with the strain. He wants Reiner to take over, but by the looks of it, he won't last much longer. 

He was shaking too, and his fingers were grasping at Bertholdt's flesh rather painfully. Bertholdt tightens around him purposefully, seated down onto him entirely, and watches as his face contorts, looking like he's in pain. Reiner groans deep in his throat and tries thrusting up into him, but Bertholdt was sitting on him, so it was hard. Bertholdt situates his legs to prop up on his shins, raising himself to give Reiner that room.

Reiner begins to buck his hips up into him, hands moving up to grasp tightly at Bertholdt's sides, fingers digging in as he thrusts up into him with their skin meeting loudly. Bertholdt lets out a moan that was the loudest from him so far, head tipping back.

“Can't—can't hold it,” Reiner growls, eyes barely open as he looks up at Bertholdt. After a moment, he presses up into Bertholdt entirely and then trembles throughout his lower body, fingernails biting down into Bertholdt's tan skin without control. Bertholdt barely feels his cock softly twitch inside of him. Their panting mixes together as Reiner's hips drop back down onto the bed. Reiner only lasted about six minutes, but that was expected. Bertholdt slips off of him with a heavy exhale and almost collapses back onto the bed. But he has the strength to pull himself to the wall, turning a little.

As he catches his breath, Bertholdt watches Reiner sit up and bring his legs off the side of the bed. Reiner pulls off the condom, ties it, and disposes of it before he returns to the bed and collapses back down onto it, making Bertholdt bounce slightly. He buries his face into Bertholdt's pillow. Bertholdt sighs.

“Hey, come over here and get me off,” Bertholdt says, nudging Reiner on the side with a foot. Reiner makes a muffled noise into the pillow, seemingly about to fall asleep, so Bertholdt kicks him this time, until Reiner sits up and rubs his hands over his face. He drops them to look over at Bertholdt with rapt attention, blond hair messy and honey eyes bright.

“Alright. What do you want me to do?”

“Finger me.”

Reiner's confident and interested attitude evaporates at that. After a pause, he scoots closer to him, looking a little hesitant and unsure. Bertholdt is so close and he just wants Reiner to make him come, and this guy was making it so much more difficult. He feels like punching him. Reiner rests his hands gently on Bertholdt's thighs, feeling the dark hairs there, and looks up at him with a slightly furrowed brow and a careful look in his eyes.

“There won't be any..like...”

“Reiner, are you serious.”

“Hey, I just don't want anything on my fingers.”

Bertholdt glares at him, “I'll just do it myself then. Jerk.” He opens his thighs wider, with Reiner sitting before him, and reaches down to rub at his hole with his wet fingers. He shivers, and drops his gaze, feeling actually kind of embarrassed now that Reiner was watching. Reiner grabs his wrist.

“No, I want to do it.”

Looking back up at him, Bertholdt sees a look of determination in Reiner's eyes. He almost smiles out of amusement. It was rather endearing, actually. He nods and draws his hand back, placing it on the bed by his side instead. Reiner shifts closer on his shins, swallows noisily, and brings a hand in to grasp Bertholdt around the balls abruptly.

Bertholdt clenches his teeth, and his hips give an unintentional jerk. He almost complains, but Reiner doesn't hold him there for long. Reiner moves on and rubs at the skin between his balls and his entrance with the knuckles of two fingers. Bertholdt wonders what the heck he's waiting for, but then he moves his fingers lower. Bertholdt sighs, not out of impatience, but with relief, when Reiner's fingertips play with his wet entrance. Reiner pauses, flicking his eyes back to Bertholdt's flushed face. Bertholdt makes a noise in his throat, jutting his chin out a little, silently telling him to just get on with it. 

Without a word, Reiner pushes in his middle finger with ease. Well, his fingers were definitely thicker, Bertholdt muses when Reiner begins to move it slightly.

Reiner adds his ring finger and moves the two back and forth, eyes raised to watch Bertholdt's face. Bertholdt's face showed no sign of pleasure, but his cheeks were pink and his eyes were dilated. And his cock was still hard, so at least that was a good sign. Bertholdt sighs.

“Do you know where the prostate is?” He asks, eyes fixed on Reiner's face. Reiner purses his lips, and shakes his head. Bertholdt's back was starting to hurt against the hard wall, but he neglects it, and readjusts his hips on the bed.

“Press up towards my stomach and just run your fingers along the inside until...well, until you see me react I guess. It isn't too far up,” Bertholdt says softly, eyes dropped to where his flushed cock lay against his belly. Reiner shifts closer to him, his knees meeting the skin of Bertholdt's hips, and wets his lips nervously. He does as he's told, pressing his fingertips up into him and gives touches against the inner wall. Bertholdt was breathing quietly, watching Reiner's face. When Reiner's honey eyes lift to his, Bertholdt drops his gaze to Reiner's toned abdomen instead. Just as Reiner reaches down to grasp his cock tightly, he feels him press against his prostate.

Bucking his hips slightly off the bed, Bertholdt's breathing hitches. 

“Th-there,” Bertholdt desperately says, reflexively reaching down to grab onto Reiner's forearm. Reiner moves his fingertips back down and harshly presses up into that same spot. Bertholdt moans suddenly, and knocks his head back into the wall. Shit, the room next to them could probably hear. If they haven't already, they definitely heard that. Reiner is mildly concerned, but if they asked or something, he could just say he brought a girl in or something. He returns to the task at hand, and gives continuous rotations to that spot as he tugs tightly at Bertholdt's dick, seeing a thick bead of pre-come build at the slit.

“F-fuck,” Bertholdt breathes, clenching fistfuls of the sheets below them, sweat building on his brow. “More. Give me another finger,” Bertholdt says, voice tight and stressed. Reiner obliges, easing in his index finger. It took a moment for his entrance to give. Bertholdt bites his lip, and feels his thighs shake when Reiner presses back up into his prostate. Reiner leans in to kiss him fully on the lips, nose bumping against his. Bertholdt returns it equally, hands raising to grasp into Reiner's hair, fingers tightening on the short blond strands. 

Reiner tightens his fingers around the leaking head of Bertholdt's cock, and that just pulls Bertholdt right of the edge. Breaking away from the kiss, he arches his back off the wall with a tight gasp, head knocking against the solid wood again, and the ropes of his come lands across Reiner's hand and his lower belly. Bertholdt slumps back against the wall and catches his breath, hands falling from Reiner's hair. Reiner removes his hands and looks at Bertholdt's flushed face before he stands from the bed and paces over to the bathroom.

As Reiner washes his hands, Bertholdt sits up and tiredly looks down at the semen caught in his pubic hair. He grimaces with disgust. He'll have to take a shower now. He looks up when Reiner paces back into the room, still rather naked of course. Reiner grins, looking over at him, and then climbs back onto the bed and it's messy, unraveled sheets. Bertholdt watches quietly as Reiner leans over and grabs him around the bicep. He lets himself be pulled into an embrace. He blushes, cheek on Reiner's shoulder, facing his neck, and timidly drapes his arms around Reiner's waist. Reiner sighs and pulls him close.

“Let me hold you for a little bit,” Reiner murmurs. Bertholdt doesn't find a complaint close to his thoughts. He closes his eyes, breathing in Reiner's scent, and grows lax in his arms. Reiner gently pulls him down to lay together on the bed. Bertholdt's legs are tangled with Reiner's, and its kind of uncomfortable, their position, but whatever. Bertholdt doesn't complain. His lips press against Reiner's neck, over his jugular vein, and feels his heartbeat against his mouth. He smiles lightly and aimlessly counts his heartbeat as Reiner strokes a hand lazily over his tan back.

“So you're the cuddly type after sex?” Bertholdt murmurs against his skin, adjusting himself against the other, trying to find a comfortable position that doesn't have his arm pinned under himself. Reiner hums and Bertholdt realizes his heartbeat is slower than before. He was probably tired now. Lifting his head to peek at the clock on the wall, Bertholdt thinks that maybe it would be a suitable time to go to bed. But just for Reiner. Bertholdt intended to take a shower and finish his homework.

He lets this go on for another ten minutes. Bertholdt listens to his soft breathing while he traces patterns into Reiner's belly that slowly rises and falls. When he does grow sleepy, and his eyelids grow heavy, he snaps out of the comforting daze and tiredly sits up. Reiner's eyelids slowly open, revealing his jaded honey eyes. He looks up at him. Propped up on his hands, Bertholdt gazes down at him as well, and searches in his irises. Reiner sluggishly lifts an arm, and Bertholdt doesn't move his gaze from Reiner's when a hand delicately caresses his cheek, thumb stroking over the flesh as he cups it with his palm. Bertholdt smiles, and leans over to kiss him on the lips sweetly.

“I'm going to take a shower. You can sleep on my bed,” Bertholdt whispers, leaning back to look at him. Reiner smiles tiredly and nods. Bertholdt thinks he is rather cute and affectionate when he's sleepy. Does he honestly always get tired after sex? Maybe its just this time. Bertholdt doesn't think over it much. He sits back and then stands from the bed. He pulls the comforter out from under Reiner, the blond barely lifting his hips, before smoothing it over him. He blushes, despite his newly gained confidence. This was kind of silly, but a good silly. Here he was, tucking in a naked Reiner, his roommate that he's been crushing on for months. 

He shakes his head to himself as he enters the bathroom to grab his body wash and scrub. Oh. He'll also have to get dressed before leaving. Sighing, Bertholdt sets his things down again. He will have to wash off the dried come then. He turns on the sink, and then hears Reiner's loud snoring begin. That was quick. Bertholdt smiles to himself, listening to his snores as he wipes the come off of his belly with a hand towel.


	30. Chapter 30

Summer break was only two months away. This fact urged Bertholdt to go to the class he hated most, to finish that paper that had pages in the double digits, and to even get up in the morning. He was finding it harder to make it to class on time. Maybe it was the winter. He always had a mild version of seasonal depression. 

Bertholdt was going over his notes for a paper he was working on, when a few knocks came from the closed door of the study room he was in. Glancing up, he sees Reiner through the glass, giving him a grin. Bertholdt sighed, despite the small spark of excitement in his stomach, and set his pen down. He gets up, swallowing nervously, and smooths out his shirt as he approaches the door.

He unlocks it and pulls open the door.

“Hey!”, Reiner greets, stepping in and clapping him on the shoulder. Bertholdt notices some books in his other hand. Bertholdt frowns, looking down at him, and shuts the door again. Reiner crosses the room to take a seat at the table, loudly pulling out the chair before dropping his books on the desk with a loud smack. Bertholdt rubs at his brow as he returns to his own seat.

“What are you doing here?” He finally asks, picking up his pen again, determined to not let Reiner distract him this time. Reiner was shifting through his books as he answered, “I assumed you were at the library, and what d'ya know.” He gives a bright grin to the other, before returning to his books. Bertholdt continues to frown.

“That doesn't answer my question.”

“I just thought I could hang with you,” Reiner says truthfully, his grin softening to a smile. Bertholdt quietly looks at that smile, and then lifts his gaze to Reiner's. Reiner's eyes were fixed on him. Bertholdt nods slightly, watching the other warily. He hopes Reiner didn't come here for 'entertainment'. Bertholdt really doesn't need that right now. He has work to do.

He almost says as much, but may as well give Reiner a chance before jumping to conclusions. Maybe Reiner did really intend on working.

Twenty minutes in, and that's not the case. It had grown peacefully silent for while now, and Bertholdt was deep in his thought process, staring down at his open notebook with a hand on his furrowed brow, bangs hiding his face as he glares down at the mess of words. The only time he remembers Reiner is even there is when he sniffs or shifts in his chair. Bertholdt wonders if Reiner got sick again, because he will not stop sniffling and its bothering him. He lifts his head to complain, but as he does that, so does Reiner.

Reiner stares at him, and then he lifts his book. Watching silently with confusion, Bertholdt squints at him when he holds that book up, keeping it open with a hand. Reiner fixes his honey colored eyes on him when he says quietly, lips curling into a smile, “Bertl, c'mere. I wanna tell you something.”

Bertholdt stares at him, and opens his mouth to question it. But its Reiner. Bertholdt knows he'll keep bugging him if he doesn't relent. So as he rolls his eyes, Bertholdt sets his hand on the table and leans over towards the other, until their faces are hidden behind the book. He blushes, eyes looking over Reiner's features, feeling his heart beat faster despite his mild annoyance with the other. 

“What?” He hisses, lips in a light frown. Reiner grins. Bertholdt wonders if he noticed his blush.

Really, he should have expected it, but then again, Reiner usually doesn't do stuff like that in public. Reiner leans over to kiss him, head tilted and eyes closed. Bertholdt had recoiled a little at first, surprised, but then returns it lightly, mildly confused and happy at the same time. Bertholdt's heartbeat really does pick up then. Inside his chest flares a warmth and giddiness that he knows is much more than just simple attraction.

He scoots his chair closer, but Reiner presses a hand to his chest. Bertholdt gets it. He doesn't want it to seem even more suspicious than it already was. Bertholdt is kind of disappointed but at least he's given this kiss in public. 

So Bertholdt keeps his distance as their lips move, his hand curled into a fist in his lap. He feels Reiner's lips separate, so Bertholdt slips his tongue out to meet Reiner's half-way. Reiner hums into his mouth as their tongues softly embrace. Bertholdt then feels a hand run up his thigh, grasping tightly. Bertholdt shifts, spreading his thighs apart with invitation. Well, fuck. He didn't mean to let Reiner distract him like this. It just kind of happened. Bertholdt, in all honesty, loved kissing his not-boyfriend anyways. Yet, he does have to get back on track.

So before it could go any further, Bertholdt breaks away with a quiet sharp inhale. He opens his eyes to see Reiner looking at him with a flushed face and a cheeky grin. Bertholdt leans away from behind the book with an unamused expression, despite his quick heart and fluttering stomach. Reiner sets the book down.

“So is that why you really came here?” Bertholdt asks as he licks his lips, sitting back in his chair, brushing Reiner's hand off his inner thigh. Reiner laughs lightly, before he says, “No, really, I came here to get work done. Sorry, just couldn't stop looking at your lips.”

That makes Bertholdt blush deeper. He nods, and picks up his pen again. He drops his gaze back to his notes, intending to focus again despite the warm feeling in his chest and stomach. Reiner returns to his own work as well, but not before pressing his knee against Bertholdt's. Bertholdt props his chin in his palm just so he can hide his happy smile behind his fingers. He would rather avoid being teased by his lover.

\----------

Reiner's books noisily clattered onto Bertholdt's desk, and Bertholdt is about to complain about the mess he made with the strewn about papers, but he's shoved back against the locked door before he can speak. He drops his bag to the floor as Reiner grasps his shirt in his hands, pulling him down to his level, and kisses him harshly on the mouth.

Bertholdt gasps in surprise, which Reiner takes as a perfect opportunity to press his tongue into his mouth. Bertholdt's brow furrows, the taller boy taking a moment to get in sync with Reiner, hands grabbing onto Reiner's forearms that were pressing him into the door. 

When Bertholdt feels those forearms lower, hands pressing down over his chest and his belly, he trembles and slips his hands up Reiner's arms to grasp onto his shoulders. Reiner's hands slip around to grope his ass in his jeans strongly, fingers dipping into a place that made Bertholdt jerk and make a noise into the kiss. Reiner's hands knead and grope his ass, Bertholdt feeling a rush of arousal in his belly. Bertholdt grows breathless, face warm and thoughts muddled and fuzzy. He can't keep up with it all. 

He presses his hands against Reiner's chest, turning away from his lips. Reiner instead leans in to mouth at Bertholdt's jaw and neck. Tipping his head back, Bertholdt says breathlessly, “R-Reiner, bed first.” His hands curl into Reiner's blonde hair nervously. Then Reiner steps back, Bertholdt noticing how his face was flushed and his mouth was red and kissed, before he grabs Bertholdt around the wrist and tugs him over to his bed. Bertholdt narrowly avoids tripping over his feet.

Rather impatiently, Reiner pushes Bertholdt back onto the bed as soon as the taller boy takes a seat. Then the blond straddles him. Blushing, Bertholdt feels his heart pound in his chest, and looks up at him with wide, pretty green eyes, hands splayed out by his head. He watches as Reiner leans over to kiss at his mouth again. Bertholdt shuts his eyes as he feels Reiner's hands hastily unbutton his jeans. Bertholdt lets him slip his hand into his jeans as their lips move. He trembles under him when Reiner grasps onto his dick through his underwear. He makes a muffled noise against Reiner's lips as Reiner gives tight squeezes.

Then Reiner leans away, so Bertholdt takes the chance to catch his breath. Bertholdt blushes when Reiner tugs up his long-sleeved shirt with his free hand, revealing his chest and dark nipples. Bertholdt doesn't have time to be embarrassed when Reiner pulls it off of him entirely. Reiner does sit back though, legs hugging the sides of Bertholdt's thighs, and gazes down at him with a sly smile as he runs his hands over his chest. Bertholdt blushes, still not quite used to this, and then says quietly, “Why am I the only one half naked right now?”

Reiner grins, eyes lustful and bright, and gropes at Bertholdt's chest, grasping the breast tissue and his nipples between his fingers. Bertholdt trembles a little as he gives him a light glare. Reiner hums, and draws his hands back.

“You could have just asked,” Reiner jokes as he grabs the back of his collar and tugs his t-shirt off in a quick movement. Bertholdt stares up at him and his dumb muscular arms and his broad shoulders and nicely defined chest. Reiner gives him a stupid cheeky grin as he tosses his shirt aside.

“Like what you see?” 

Bertholdt lifts his gaze to Reiner's amused honey eyes.

“I hardly see enough,” Bertholdt murmurs boldly, cheeks growing warmer, and smiles lightly. Reiner blinks a few times, laughs, and then muses in a teasing tone, “Is that so?”

He leans over to kiss him on the lips. Bertholdt closes his eyes, feeling the bed dip on either side of him, and moves his lips with Reiner's. He lifts his hands to hook them around Reiner's neck. Reiner's teeth bite at his bottom lip. Bertholdt opens his mouth willingly, feeling Reiner's soft tongue press into his.

Bertholdt feels Reiner move on top of him, and then hands run down over his sides to grab at the waistbands of his jeans and underwear. Bertholdt lifts his hips when Reiner tugs them down. Breaking the kiss, Reiner sits back, and gets off of Bertholdt's lap to pull his jeans and underwear off. Bertholdt press his knees together when Reiner tosses the clothing onto the floor. Reiner tsks.

“C'mon,” he says as he stands from the bed, flicking his wrist at Bertholdt's legs, “Open 'em up.” Then he reaches down to unbutton his own jeans and steps out of them and his briefs, eyes fixed down on the other, who seemed rather meek.

That makes Bertholdt blush darkly, mouth pressing into a tight, embarrassed frown. He glances to and from Reiner's naked body, before settling his gaze on his own belly. Reiner simply crosses his arms and quirks an eyebrow at him, standing before him without any shred of decency. Bertholdt turns his head away when he slowly spread his thighs, hands grasping at the blanket under him. Reiner smiles brightly, pleased, and climbs back onto the bed, situating himself between his legs.

“That wasn't so bad, now was it?” Reiner muses teasingly, honey eyes gazing down at the other fondly.

Bertholdt peeks at him, face flushed, and hesitatingly settles his legs around Reiner's hips. Reiner sits back on his calves and bluntly situates Bertholdt's tan legs around himself, making Bertholdt even more flustered. Bertholdt is this close to hiding behind his hands but he fights that urge. Reiner would only tease him.

He remains quiet as Reiner sets a hand on his inner thigh. 

“R-Reiner, this is embarrassing,” he mutters, knees pressing into Reiner's sides in a vain attempt to close his legs again. He wasn't that comfortable with being completely exposed like this to his partner, and sadly, Reiner was one to openly “appreciate”. Reiner merely smirks down at him, and then reaches his other hand in to grasp onto his cock that was curled around a tan thigh. Bertholdt bites his lip.

“Aw, you're already kinda hard for me,” Reiner says cheerfully as he gives slow strokes, playfully disregarding his words. Bertholdt does then lift his hands to hide his face behind them, shaking his head side to side. Reiner watches as he gives tighter pulls, squeezing around the head. It makes Bertholdt tremble visibly. Reiner notices how his belly dips when he tenses up. He was acting rather cute, and it made Reiner smile widely.

“Let me see your face, Bertl.”

Bertholdt quickly shakes his head. Reiner can't help but grin now. He almost laughs. Reiner reaches his other hand up to curls his fingers around Bertholdt's wrist. He gently pulls, and Bertholdt lets him bring his hand down. Then he drops the other to his side once more.

Bertholdt was blushing a dark pink, his eyes downcast and mouth curled into an embarrassed frown. Reiner hums, and slides his fingers up that same wrist, into his hand to lock his fingers with Bertholdt's. He pins his hand on the bed as he leans in to softly kiss him on the mouth. Bertholdt makes a small noise and meekly kisses back.

“Much better,” Reiner murmurs with a smile, pulling back slightly to meet his olive green eyes. Bertholdt is mesmerized with his golden irises and stares, silent, until Reiner leans in to kiss him again. 

He softly returns it, feeling that same warmth in his chest due to Reiner holding his hand lovingly on the covers. Bertholdt lets his knees fall from Reiner's sides, no longer trying to close his legs. He moans softly against Reiner's mouth when Reiner continues to touch him with a secure grasp, fingers moving tightly around the sensitive head.

After a minute, Reiner does stop touching as soon as Bertholdt begins to fidget under him. Instead he grabs his other hand and threads his fingers with Bertholdt's. With his hands pinned onto the bed, all Bertholdt can do is move his mouth with Reiner's.

Bertholdt feels something rather stiff poke into his thigh. He grins against Reiner's lips, amused. Reiner sits away a moment later. Opening his eyes, Bertholdt looks up into his golden lustful eyes with a small smile. Reiner licks his lips, eyebrows furrowed in an unspoken question. Bertholdt shakes his head, trying to repress his grin. Reiner cocks a brow and then smiles himself. Bertholdt drops his gaze out of shyness. Reiner laughs quietly as he lets his hands go.

“We're not out of lube, are we?” Reiner asks as he props himself up on a hand, leaning past Bertholdt to reach his night stand. Bertholdt cranes his head back into the bed to watch Reiner pull open the drawer, answering quietly, “No, I don't think it would run out after four uses..” It was a new bottle, after all, Bertholdt adds mentally.

Reiner looks down at him past his arm with a grin as he grabs the bottle.

“You've counted?”

Bertholdt frowns, before he says, “Reiner, I'm in Calculus. I think it should be easy for me to keep track.” Reiner laughs again as he sits back with the lubricant in his grasp. “Good point. Just thought you wouldn't.” Bertholdt almost rolls his eyes, but instead he just gives him an unamused expression that makes Reiner grin. 

When Reiner squeezes some into his own palm, Bertholdt pauses, and then asks, “You're going to do it?” He makes an incredulous expression when Reiner nods. 

“Thought I could do it this time.”

Bertholdt was kind of hesitant, not mostly because of the embarrassing factor, but because Reiner might do a shitty job. But its not that hard. Bertholdt watches quietly as Reiner coats his fingers with the lube.

“Uh,” Reiner begins as he scoots back a little for room, lowering his hand, “Just...tell me if it hurts.” Bertholdt does roll his eyes that time.

“As long as you don't jam them in, I'll be good. Just go slow.”

Reiner nods with a slight smile. 

Bertholdt sits up a little bit, propping on his elbows, and watches Reiner's expression when he presses a wet fingertip to his entrance. Bertholdt remains silent when Reiner pushes that finger in. Reiner glances up at him. Bertholdt drops his gaze to Reiner's hand and shifts his hips, silently urging him to go on. Reiner moves that finger a little bit.

Reiner hadn't done the preparation before. Sadly, it was a necessity, so Bertholdt had to deal with the embarrassment of Reiner watching him finger himself four times. Which was getting tiresome, so honestly, Bertholdt was relieved he finally decided to offer a hand. 

When Reiner adds a second, Bertholdt bites his lip and glances up at the blond again. Reiner was looking down at what he was doing with a furrowed brow. Bertholdt not only bites his lip because of the sensations, but to hold back his laughter too. He looked too concentrated for this. When Reiner glances up at him, Bertholdt tries to suppress his grin unsuccessfully. 

“What?” Reiner asks, his fingers stopping. Bertholdt lets out a shaky exhale, trying not to laugh.

“Nothing..you're just putting too much effort into this. Just hurry up and fuck me already.”

He surprises himself that he said that, but its what he wants. Reiner blinks a few times, and then he grins a little bit. He nods and lifts his free hand to press it down on Bertholdt's belly. Bertholdt feels him begin to move his fingers a little more confidently. 

Reiner decides that's good enough three fingers and a few minutes later, and removes his fingers. Bertholdt relaxes a little more into the bed. He silently watches as Reiner reaches past him to grab a condom out of his nightstand.

As Reiner puts on the condom, Bertholdt scoots back and then turns over onto his belly. He also wanted to do something other than missionary or cowgirl. With his legs still on either side of Reiner, he settles down onto his chest and belly, forearms folded in front of him. He glances back to see Reiner staring at him, the condom still in his hands.

“You should also apply more lube, once you decide to actually put the condom on,” Bertholdt says, despite his growing blush, ears hot and his heart racing. He felt even more embarrassed than usual during sex, for some reason. Maybe it was just Reiner. He wonders if it had to do with something other than his self-consciousness. Bertholdt doesn't want to think about it now. Instead he knocks his calf into Reiner's side when the stupid blond still stares down at him.

That makes Reiner move again. He's quick to pull on the condom with shaky fingers, that Bertholdt barely notices. Then Bertholdt passes him the lube bottle. Over his shoulder, Bertholdt watches silently as Reiner coats his erection with the lubrication. Bertholdt shifts his hips a little so he can gain some friction on his dick against the covers. He was getting impatient, and watching Reiner touch his cock turned him on.

“Hurry up,” Bertholdt grumbles as Reiner situates himself behind him. Bertholdt brings himself up on his knees slightly, getting up on his elbows a little bit as well. Bertholdt continues to watch as Reiner grabs him around the hip a little roughly, handling him with a strength that always made Bertholdt hard. 

Bertholdt bites his lip as he watches Reiner grab his cock and press it against his entrance. When he eases the thick head in, he raises his golden eyes to Bertholdt's. Bertholdt's eyes falter a little when Reiner slides in with a slow push, but he keeps his gaze locked with Reiner's when he presses into him entirely. 

As Reiner pulls back out, Bertholdt drops his head onto his forearms. A small groan escapes his lips when Reiner pushes in, hips pressing down into Bertholdt's. Bertholdt gives small circles of his hips back against Reiner's, wringing a gasp from the other. 

Bertholdt licks his dry lips, and summons the confidence to demand with a flushed face, “Faster. Give it to me.” Reiner is quiet as he begins to move his hips again. His warm hands keep tight grasps around Bertholdt's waist as he obliges, his hips colliding back down into Bertholdt's repeatedly with a more confident tempo.

Moaning, Bertholdt tightly grabs onto the covers, head tipping back a little. Their skin meets a little too noisily in the room. Bertholdt feels a warmth spread steadily through his body, making him grow perspired. The majority of the heat builds in his belly.

Reiner's hips are heavy and quick against him, putting a strain on Bertholdt's thighs. It was growing harder and harder to keep himself up. Reiner was pressing his hand down onto his back, keeping him still as he pounds into him, his thrusts more erratic and harsh. The bed springs creak boisterously, but there's not much to do about it. It would be all too obvious what was happening. They weren't being too careful.

Bertholdt's fingers were shaking in their grasp, his waist now being pressed down into the bed. Feeling Reiner's weight on top of him both suffocates him and gives him a thrilling feeling that Bertholdt wasn't used to. He also noticed he was drooling onto the bed, a thin rope of his saliva falling from his bottom lip, his mouth agape with a silent moan. 

Not only was it all overwhelming and hot, Bertholdt felt Reiner's cock head press against his prostate each time he thrusts back into him. He was a trembling, moaning mess in the midst of it all, and only did he notice he was being noisy when Reiner's hand clamps over his mouth. He moans against his fingers, eyebrows furrowing tightly.

“C-Christ Bertholdt, be quiet,” Reiner mutters behind him, his voice breathless and tight. Bertholdt's muffled groans grow softer at Reiner's demand. A moment later, the hand moves from his mouth and props up by Bertholdt's shoulder instead. Bertholdt buries his face into the comforter, biting onto his lip as Reiner forces his hips down into the bed, pressing deep into him. Bertholdt's knuckles are white with how tightly he's grasping the blanket.

Only when he feels lips kiss at his neck does he relax his hands. He presses his hips back up into Reiner on top of him, and brings his head up to pant. One of Reiner's hands presses down between his shoulder blades, keeping him still as he kisses his shoulder. He begins to move his hips again.

“Mmh, Reiner,” Bertholdt breathes, mouth falling open. Reiner bites the tan skin of his shoulder as he starts a harsher pace of fucking Bertholdt into the bed, his hand heavy on his back. Bertholdt reaches his hands back over his shoulders automatically, grasping fistfuls of Reiner's short blond hair. Reiner grunts behind him.

“Going to fucking come,” Reiner growls, giving a few more quick snaps of his hips. Bertholdt eyelids flutter when he feels an intense orgasm rip through him, his leaking cock caught between his belly and the comforter. Reiner's harsh thrusting gave the stimulation Bertholdt needed, the movements making Bertholdt buck against the bed.

He silently comes against the covers of his bed as Reiner stills, pressing down into him as he lets out a deep groan. 

After that, panting is what fills the silence, as well as a few single creaks when Reiner gets off of Bertholdt and collapses beside him on the bed. Then a moment later he gets up to take off the condom. Bertholdt remains face down on the bed for a long minute, until he sluggishly turns over with closed eyes, bangs matted to his forehead with sweat. His hands remain splayed up by his head. He gasps for breath as Reiner takes a heavy seat beside him again, jostling him and the bed. 

“Jesus, that surely let the entire dorm know we're fucking,” Reiner mutters, rubbing a hand over his face as he sighs. Bertholdt mumbles something in reply. Reiner glances over his shoulder towards his partner, who looked utterly fucked out. Bertholdt feels eyes on him, and cracks his eyelids open to look over at the other. He tries to catch his breath, a slow lazy smile drifting over his lips.

“Best out of five,” he mumbles, before he closes his eyes again. Reiner laughs lightly, and reaches over to brush Bertholdt's sweaty bangs back. Bertholdt feels that hand rest over his forehead, before it moves down to touch his flushed cheek gently. Bertholdt leans into it with a smile. 

He opens his eyes once more, and gazes over at Reiner's soft expression, a suffocating feeling of adoration blooming around his heart. Bertholdt opens his mouth. Words he can't decipher teeter on his tongue. He closes his mouth. A moment later, Reiner leans over to kiss him gently on the lips.

 

The next day, Marco was glancing at him repeatedly during English. And Bertholdt's ass hurt like he used a cactus as a dildo.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** Thought I could share the songs I listened to while I wrote this part! 
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uA36tQuJ1II
> 
> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJ9rUzIMcZQ


	31. Chapter 31

“So its kind of obvious now,” Jean says in a prodding tone, breaking the previous brief silence. Reiner had left to use the bathroom, so Jean took it upon himself to confront the socially awkward boy sitting across from him.

Bertholdt's entire body tenses up. He raises his gaze to Jean, who was sitting on a loveseat with Marco. Marco was looking over at his friend with an expression of concern, biting on his lip. Eren and Connie were pretty much sprawled out on the largest couch. Their attention diverted to what Jean had said.

“So are you and Reiner a thing now?” Jean bluntly demands, adjusting his arm that was behind Marco on the couch. Marco nudges him and says he shouldn't be so rude. Jean keeps his eyes locked on Bertholdt's. The atmosphere grew tense almost instantly. Bertholdt breaks into a sweat and lifts a hand to lightly bite at his fingertips. Marco's face hardens. So he drops his hand and sighs.

“Just..don't let Reiner know that you know,” Bertholdt miserably mutters, the noise of the TV too quiet to overlap it. His fingers fidget in his lap. Jean looks mildly triumphant, and then asks, “Why?” Connie is sitting up straighter, and Eren actually puts his phone away. Marco remains quiet. 

Bertholdt worries at his lip, before he quietly answers, “I believe he's afraid of what you guys will think..”

“Well, that's stupid!” Connie speaks up, crossing his arms. Bertholdt looks over at him silently. 

“It doesn't matter if he likes guys, he's still my friend,” Connie says, glancing around the group. Eren nods and Marco quietly agrees. Eren adds, crossing his arms loosely as well, “And plus, if we're cool with Jean and Marco, we'd be fine with you two being together. It isn't a big issue.” Bertholdt glances at him. He has a point.

“You fuckin' better be cool with us,” Jean mutters sourly. Marco nudges him harder this time, earning a pained grunt. 

Bertholdt looks back to Jean and remains silent. He isn't sure this is his place to talk. They should be saying that to Reiner, not himself. Bertholdt opens his mouth to speak, but pauses, noticing how everyone had grown rigid and silent. He glances over to see Reiner walking over. 

He collapses onto the loveseat next to Bertholdt, and casually drapes an arm behind him on the couch. He glances between everyone. He simply quirks a brow, doesn't comment, and returns his attention back to the game that was playing on the TV. Bertholdt tenses up all over again when Reiner situates himself closer to him.

\----------

The next time Bertholdt visits the gymnasium, he debates whether to tell Reiner the truth about his friends knowing. Even if he told Jean not to tell him, Bertholdt wonders if it would be the right thing to do. 

He's already done his routine on the diagonal bar and the mat, so he was doing some easy exercises on the balance bar. Despite the ache in his muscles and the unpleasant sweat on his skin, he continues with the workout, mind focused both on his balance and Reiner. Really, he is glad that Reiner's friends knew. It meant that they didn't have to hide anything, but how would Reiner react to it? Would he end the relationship, whatever it was, simply because it was out in the open? Its not like it was hard to guess anyways. People probably assumed they were together before they even became a thing. 

Bertholdt is full of sighs as he gets off the balance bar and begins his cool down stretches. 

Within twenty-five minutes, he changed into his clothing, started his car after two tries, and drove back to the campus. 

It was rainy again today, so the pavement was wet and dark. Small puddles splash around his feet as he hurries over to the front door of his dormitory building. He knows that he definitely does not smell pleasant, and his hair was sticking to the back of his neck both with sweat and the rain, so he has to take a shower. He just wanted to get back as soon as possible, so he didn't consider taking a shower back at the gymnasium. 

Bertholdt trudges up the stairs with his bag hoisted over his shoulder, brow furrowed. He was still unsure as before. Maybe telling Reiner the truth would be better than keeping it to himself. And there was also the factor that Jean or Connie would let him know despite Bertholdt asking them not to (he assumes Eren wouldn't). Bertholdt worries at his lip as he approaches the door down the hall.

Sighing for the hundredth time that night, Bertholdt withdraws his keys and unlocks the door. He pushes it open, and glances in. He smiles when he sees Reiner at his desk, scribbling in a notebook, his head bowed. Bertholdt quietly enters and shuts the door behind him with a soft click. It earns Reiner's gaze, and a smile.

“Welcome back. How was it?”

Bertholdt sets his bag down. He locks the door as he lifts a foot to tug at the laces of his shoe. 

“It was alright. I was kind of distracted.”

Reiner quirks a brow, and a cheeky smirk slips over his lips, “With what?”

Bertholdt almost instantaneously breaks into a nervous sweat. He drops his gaze to his foot as he pulls of his converse shoe. He tries to think of an alternative to the truth as he works on getting off the other. He wobbles on his one foot as he tugs the other shoe off.

“Stuff and things,” Bertholdt answers lamely, giving Reiner a sheepish smile. Reiner laughs lightly, nods, and then says in an amused tone, “Stuff and things? Alright then.” Bertholdt blushes a little as he approaches the other with quiet steps. Then he pauses, realizing he still reeks from his work out, and steps back. Reiner blinks and then asks, “What?”

Bertholdt hesitates. Reiner shouldn't care. He shakes his head and steps up to kiss him softly on the mouth, setting a hand gently on his shoulder. Reiner hums and returns the short kiss. Bertholdt, blushing, leans away.

“I have to take a shower. I won't distract you anymore,” Bertholdt says, pats him on the shoulder, and then turns to approach the bathroom to grab his things for said shower. Reiner calls after him, “Y'know, I think I need to take one too!”

Bertholdt grins to himself as he grabs his brush and scrub.

Pacing out, he replies, “I think you need to focus on your work. That's what you need to do. I'll be quick, anyways.” Bertholdt offers a light smile when Reiner pouts. He gives him a wave, earning a grin, and then slips out of the room into the chilly hallway, making sure to lock the door behind himself. He knows Connie likes to disrupt Reiner no matter what he's busy with.

 

When he first steps under the warm spray of the shower after getting undressed, he exhales with gratefulness. He begins to wash his hair, enjoying the soothing water slipping down his sore limbs. 

 

Bertholdt tries not to spend too long. His back was hurting and he wanted to get back to his bed in the dorm room. He was ready to pass out as soon as his head hit the pillow. When he returns to the dorm room with his hair damp and skin no longer smelling like sweat, he finds Reiner sprawled over his bed, flipping his phone in his hands. He looks up, head craned back against his plush pillows, and gives a bright grin.

“Hey, Bertl. Didja touch yourself?”

“No, you perv,” Bertholdt replies as he shuts and locks the door behind himself. Reiner laughs as Bertholdt crosses the room to enter the bathroom. He puts his stuff away and then walks out to where Reiner lays on his bed.

“What are you doing on my bed anyways?” Bertholdt asks, setting his hands on his hips, looking down at the blond who was grinning up at him with amusement. Reiner stops toying with his phone and sets it on his chest.

“Am I not permitted to lay on it?”

“Well...as long as you don't do questionable things, I guess its okay.”

Reiner snickers, and then reaches a hand out. Bertholdt rolls his eyes, knowing Reiner should still be working (and truthfully, so should he), but he decides he could use some cuddling right now. And maybe a back massage. But perhaps that's wishful thinking. He takes the hand and climbs onto the bed. Reiner smiles and pulls him close a bit roughly. Bertholdt grunts when he's confined in Reiner's strong arms. He gives Reiner an unamused expression that the blond only laughs at.

When a soft kiss is pressed to his mouth, Bertholdt returns it weakly, but then fidgets in his hold. His back was hurting. “Reiner, let me go,” Bertholdt grumbles against his lips. Reiner finally obliges and loosens his arms. Bertholdt lets himself lay on Reiner's chest, now that he wasn't painfully pulled close. He sighs, setting his head down on Reiner's shoulder, and closes his eyes. His feet were dangling off the end, but it can't be helped. It was so warm and comfy, anyways..

Reiner strokes a hand over Bertholdt's back, which definitely did not help with Bertholdt's attempt to stay conscious. He was slowly slipping under. What time was it again? He mumbles the same question.

“Ten twenty-two,” Reiner answers, after glancing at his alarm clock. Bertholdt hums and nuzzles into his chest. He sighs.

“Tired?” Reiner softly asks, bringing his hand up to stroke it over Bertholdt's damp locks instead. Bertholdt nods sleepily. Reiner's chest moves when he laughs lightly. It grows silent then for about ten minutes, save for the humming of Reiner's open laptop left on his desk. Bertholdt is about to slip under when Reiner shifts and turns them on their sides. Bertholdt grumbles and cracks his tired eyelids open to watch Reiner climb over him, slipping off the bed, which also jostled it. 

“I'll turn off the light,” Reiner explains, giving Bertholdt's tired glare a light smile. He pats his head and then steps past the headboard of his bed to flick the light switch. The only source of light comes from Reiner's laptop. Bertholdt had turned onto his belly, so his arm was dangling off the side, fingers resting on the floor. He feels Reiner lift his arm and tuck it by his side. The covers were crumpled up in the corner of the bed (probably from Reiner's doing earlier), so Reiner pulls them over Bertholdt.

“Thanks,” Bertholdt grumbles into the bed. Reiner hums and smooths it out, and then rests his hand on Bertholdt's back. Bertholdt distantly wonders why he's just standing there for a moment. Then he feels a light pressure on his head, and realizes it was a kiss. He turns his head into the bed to hide his dark blush. Reiner says goodnight and then turns to take a seat at his desk. 

Shortly, Bertholdt hears him begin to type. He falls asleep within ten minutes to the lulling noise.

\----------

Rain falls in sheets down onto the pavement and wets the grass and trees, as well as Reiner's hair. Of all the days he chose not to wear a hoodie. He sighs as he jogs over to the entrance of the Starbucks. It was April, why was it still raining so much? Reiner grumbles as he tugs open the front door and paces in. Glancing over, he spots Bertholdt sitting at their usual table, head bowed down as he types out something on his phone. Reiner also notices their usual drinks in front of him. Grinning, Reiner steps up to the table. Bertholdt raises his head at the sound of footsteps. He smiles up at Reiner.

“Hey, sorry for being late, Mr. Smith gave me a big lecture after class,” Reiner sheepishly says, rubbing at the back of his neck. Bertholdt sure looks cute when he smiles. Bertholdt shrugs and then gestures to the steaming coffee across from his caramel frappuccino. 

Reiner's grin widens, and says, “How thoughtful.” He takes off his coat, revealing his tight t-shirt that he knew accented his sexy as fuck chest (he knows Bertholdt stares, too), while Bertholdt smiles shyly. After he shakes off the water droplets, he drapes it over the back of his chair. Reiner takes a squeaky seat across from the taller boy and wraps his pink tinted hands around the warm cup. Sighing, he sinks back into his chair and smiles lazily over at Bertholdt.

“So, about time the rain stopped, huh?” Reiner muses, glancing over Bertholdt's features. He was definitely blushing easily lately. Reiner wonders why. Bertholdt typically doesn't get flustered over normal greetings and stuff. Maybe his face was just cold. Reiner takes a careful drink of his coffee.

“Yeah, maybe a few more weeks,” Bertholdt replies softly, taking a sip of his frap as he stares over at Reiner. Reiner sighs and shakes his head, “Wish it would end now.” Bertholdt offers a light smile and sets his frap down.

“What was Mr. Smith lecturing you about?” Bertholdt asks.

“Uh,” Reiner begins, twirling his cup around on the surface of the table, “He was going on about how I need to focus more. That since I'm paying for the class, I should consider paying attention.” He rolls his eyes. Its not like _he_ was paying. His parents just pressured him into taking Business. Bertholdt purses his lips, but doesn't comment. Reiner assumes he thinks the same thing as Mr. Smith. Its not like Reiner had trouble focusing, its just he didn't care to. He has no idea what he intends to do after college, so..he feels that its pointless. 

That was definitely selfish, seeing as it was costing his parents sums of money, but that's what he was. He was selfish. And his parents _wanted_ him to go to college. To take _these_ specific classes, so. Whatever. Reiner is tired of thinking about this, and sighs, running a hand through his wet hair.

Bertholdt was watching him with soft eyes, appearing to be concerned. Reiner offers a weak smile. 

“How was class?” Reiner asks, hoping to distract himself and provide conversation simultaneously. He takes a drink, looking over at Bertholdt with interested eyes. Bertholdt pauses, glances down at his frap and the caramel painted over the whipped cream, saying, “Um..it was fine. Marco asked how you've been, since you guys hadn't talked in a little bit.”

Bertholdt looks up at him with curious eyes. Reiner blinks and then recalls, yeah, he hadn't talked to Marco in a few days. Had been busy with papers and such. He hums and strokes thoughtfully at his chin. It coaxes a light smile from Bertholdt, which makes Reiner grin in return. He shrugs as he drops his hand.

“Tell him I've been busting my ass trying to get in contact with him and see his beautiful freckled face,” Reiner says with a joking tone of voice, batting his eyelashes as he delicately sets a hand over his cheek. Bertholdt snorts and then asks, “Should I tell him you're being sarcastic or..”

“He'll know,” Reiner replies with a sharp nod, grinning. Bertholdt shakes his head with a smile and brings the straw of his drink to his lips. Reiner gazes over at the other and his smile as he takes a swig of his own coffee. Reiner wonders how he even landed such a cute guy. Not that's he particularly “landed” any other guy, but still. Bertholdt was really frickin' adorable at times. Like right now. He's got that little blush going on and that meek smile and those soft, gooey eyes that are so pretty in the sun. Not that its particularly sunny right now. Reiner blinks, realizing he's gushing over Bertholdt's appearance, and blushes himself. He looks down when Bertholdt looks up at him.

“You're flushed,” Bertholdt comments softly, “Are you sick from the rain?” 

“I'm sick _of_ the rain..” Reiner grumbles, trying to duck his head down. He hopes Bertholdt drops it. When he hears Bertholdt shift, he glances up. Bertholdt was reaching out to him. He slides his hand over Reiner's forehead. Reiner, stunned, stares over at him. Before he can react Bertholdt withdraws his hand and furrows his brow.

“No fever..” Bertholdt muses thoughtfully. Then it clicks and he makes an amused expression. Reiner sighs and hides his face behind a hand, elbow propped on the table. His ears were burning, too. Damn it.

“Are you _blushing_ , Reiner?”

“No,” Reiner mutters behind his hand. Bertholdt giggles, _giggles_ , and then Reiner feels warm fingers gently wrap around his wrist, trying to pull it away. Reiner huffs, and lets him lower his hand. He looks down at the table.

“You _are_. Lemme get a picture,” Bertholdt says as he withdraws his phone. Reiner smacks his hands over his face, and hisses, “Bertholdt! C'mon, don't do that.” Bertholdt laughs cheerfully again. Reiner hears him set his elbows on the table, and then his fingers tapping over his phone.

“Reiner, that's not fair. You have those pictures of me, so I get one of you.”

Reiner tenses up, and drops his hands to look up at him with wide eyes. He _knew_ about those? He notices Bertholdt's triumphant smile, and then realizes his phone is raised. The tell-tale click of the camera goes off. Reiner stares at him blankly, and then reaches over to snatch it before he can pull it back. Bertholdt sputters.

“I'm gonna delete it!” Reiner claims loudly as he hurriedly opens up the camera roll.

“Hey, hey! Not fair!” Bertholdt shouts as he jerks across the table, arms stretched out to swipe at his phone that was lowered in Reiner's lap. Reiner lifts his hands away, keeping the phone out of reach, and desperately hits the trash bin icon. Why wasn't it working?! 

“Reiner!” Bertholdt growls, trying to reach it, jostling the table. Reiner laughs with evil delight when the damn phone finally registers it. The photo slides into the trash bin icon with a schwooping noise that Reiner only can describe as “schwooping”. Hopefully the employees won't kick them out because of the shouting. 

Bertholdt finally snatches his phone away. His elbow cocks out when he sits back into his chair, knocking over his caramel frap. Reiner's reflexes are typically fast, and despite reaching out, he isn't fast enough. It explodes everywhere on the tile of the floor. The five other people sitting around and the employees are probably staring. Reiner curses as Bertholdt makes a stressed out noise sounding like a 'meep'. 

“Reiner..” Bertholdt mutters in a tone that suggests he is heartbroken over his spilled caramel frappuccino. Reiner rubs at his forehead as he gets up. “Sorry. I'll get you a new one,” Reiner says gently, looking over at Bertholdt's slightly disappointed expression. He turns and approaches the table by the front counter that holds napkins and utensils for the cake they sell here. He grabs a wad of napkins and approaches the remains of what used to be Bertholdt's Caramel Frappuccino #4894. He crouches down to begin cleaning it up. Bertholdt gets down on his knees to help too.

“Didn't know you were camera shy,” Bertholdt says quietly as they wipe it up. Reiner laughs lightly as he shoves a few more soaking napkins into the empty Starbucks cup. “I'm not,” he says as he wipes away the rest of the drink, “Just..I didn't want you to have a picture of me blushing, of all things. That's it.” Bertholdt snorts. Reiner glances up at him. He was grinning a little.

“You're so stupid sometimes, y'know that?”

Reiner huffs, and then grabs the cup. Bertholdt flinches with his hands raised when Reiner pretends to fling it's contents at him. He laughs when Bertholdt smacks him on the arm. He knows the other customers must be staring, but whatever. He stands and then grabs the hand that Bertholdt raises. He tugs him up easily and then turns to approach the trash bin by the counter to throw away the mess.

 

After he returns to the table with a fresh caramel frappuccino, he sets it down in front of Bertholdt, and then takes a heavy seat across from him. He lets out a deep exhale as Bertholdt quietly thanks him and then takes a drink, pinching the straw absentmindedly between his fingers. 

Reiner smiles at the other. Bertholdt blushes, again, and drops his gaze, still sucking on his straw. Reiner leans over and sets his elbows on the table.

“So..how'd you learn about the pictures?”

Bertholdt lifts his eyes to him again, the dark green in them capturing Reiner's fascination once more, and then he smirks a little around the straw. He sets the frap down and crosses his arms. 

“I don't know of any pictures. I just assumed you had some, and I used it as an excuse. So, what pictures are _you_ talking about?” Bertholdt says this with a smug expression. Reiner stares at him with raised brows. Then he raises a hand to rub at his face with a groan. He can't believe he fell into that. He laughs lightly, shaking his head, and smacks his hand down on the table. He takes a long drink of his latte, giving a light glare over at Bertholdt's amused smile. 

“Alright,” Reiner begins, setting his drink down and holding his hand up in a 'listen' gesture. Bertholdt prompts him with a jut of his eyebrows. Reiner laughs nervously and brings his hand in to rub it over his chin.

“Well, I may have...kinda...perhaps...took pictures of you when you were sleeping.” 

He looks at the other sheepishly. Bertholdt's face goes blank and then he laughs lightly. He keeps his arms crossed as he leans in a little, asking, “And when was this?”

“Uh..” Reiner begins, furrowing his brow as he thinks about it. “November..ish?” He waits for a shit storm to retaliate. Bertholdt stares at him. Slowly, a blush spreads over his face. Reiner grins, relieved he wouldn't be angry, but rather embarrassed. Right on. Reiner won't be smacked for it then.

Bertholdt exhales deeply, and then he laughs. He shakes his head and snickers a little bit. Reiner watches, grin extending. Bertholdt looks at him with a smile, his face pleasantly flushed.

“You're an idiot. Show me.”

Reiner gives a nonchalant shrug, grinning, and lifts his hip off his chair to dig out his phone, saying, “Alright.”

 

In the end he's smacked on the head because he refused to delete them when Bertholdt demanded it, insisting he looked stupid in them. And he was drooling too! The horror! 

But Reiner only thought he was cute. That was the reason he took them. 

This time when they walk back to the dorm, he lets Bertholdt hold his hand. But only because he let Reiner keep the photos. It could be seen as a friendly thing, anyways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **A/N:** I'll have you know that Bertholdt didn't really have 4894 caramel frappuccinos so far, Reiner was just exaggerating (only because he's bought him like...a lot). 
> 
> Also really, really lovely fanart for this fic by the talented hanatsuki89!:
> 
> http://hanatsuki89.tumblr.com/post/80246764238/some-reibert-fanart-i-did-because-im-totally-and

**Author's Note:**

> esidisi-kars.tumblr.com


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